Chapter 7: In Which Severus Loses an Argument
It's true that some mistakes can never be amended no matter what you do, but that doesn't mean it's all right to give up before you even try. - Noriko Ogiwara, Dragon Sword and Wind Child
"You know the forbidden corridor in the third floor?" said Ron, apropos of nothing.
"It's forbidden," Draco said shortly. Succinct (and unnecessary) as this statement was, it only made Ron more determined to say his piece.
"Fred and George – the twins, you know – say there's something exciting up there. They heard it snoring."
"Fred and George are the worst tricksters to plague Hogwarts in years. Professor Snape told my father so."
Yet again, Harry found himself stopping a fight breaking out. "Maybe they're right, but what were they doing on the third floor anyway?"
Ron shrugged. "Didn't ask. Don't want t' know, either."
"Well, Fred and George can have the third floor corridor, and they're welcome to it." Draco's tone practically dripped contempt for Weasleys in general and those two in particular. "What about your bet, Harry? Are you going to admit defeat?"
"Bet? What bet?" Ron asked immediately.
Harry winced. He'd almost forgotten about the bet. "I bet a hundred Galleons that I'll sail around the lake in a cauldron by Hallowe'en."
Ron's eyes did an excellent impersonation of dinner plates. "You're crazy! The teachers'll skin you alive if you try it! Even the twins haven't tried that!"
Draco glared at Ron. "He made a bet, and he'll keep it or Merlin help him!"
"Don't suppose you've got any ideas on how I could do it?" Harry interrupted, giving Ron his best "puppy-dog-eyes".
The other boy hesitated. "Well… You could use Wingardium Leviosa on it t' keep it above the surface, s'ppose, but it'd be dangerous an' you'd best know how to swim. Or you could use a Bubblehead charm, but those're pretty advanced. An', if you don't want to get in trouble, you should do it when no one's around to see 'cept us."
Draco bristled. "Us? Who said you were invited?"
"If my friend's goin' to do something like that, I'll be there to watch," Ron retorted, planting his hands on his hips and looking her straight in the eye.
"Excuse me?"
Once again, Ron and Draco's enmity towards each other was diverted in the face of a greater enemy: Hermione Granger. The Ravenclaw stood behind them with a stack of books in her arms, ink stains on her face, and her hair even wilder than usual.
"I couldn't help overhear what you were saying, and I think it's shocking that you could even imagine doing something so stupid! Don't you know how many things could go wrong? You could drown, or catch hypothermia-"
"What's hyper-term-eeah?" Ron wondered aloud.
"-or be caught and expelled!"
Draco drew herself up to her full height – which was just an inch taller than Hermione – and gave the Ravenclaw the iciest glare she could manage. "I fail to see how what we do affects you. Even if we are caught and expelled, you had nothing to do with it. You could even say you tried to stop us. But if you even think of sneaking on us, I'll demonstrate a hex that removes a person's mouth."
Hermione looked outraged. "You can't do that! I've read about that hex; it's considered Dark magic!"
Ron snorted. Draco raised an eyebrow. Harry sighed.
"Look, Hermione, we're not breaking any rules, so there's no reason to worry about us."
Hermione's eyebrows shot up. "Of course you're breaking the rules!"
"Is there a rule that says 'Thou shalt not use cauldrons for boats'? Then how can we be breaking the rules?"
"There's no rule that forbids us hiding a man-eating lion in the Headmaster's office, but I don't think that excuse would let someone who tried it off the hook," Hermione retorted.
Ron guffawed. "Who'd hide a lion in a school?"
"Your brothers," Draco said under her breath.
Harry tried to get the conversation back on track. "It's nice of you to be so worried, but it's really none of your business."
"That means go away," Draco added.
Hermione sniffed and stalked away.
Minerva paced the length of the staff room impatiently. Pomona had asked her to come here, but there was no sign of her or any of the other staff, and if there was one thing Minerva hated, it was being kept waiting.
The door creaked open. Minerva spun around, expecting Pomona.
"Good afternoon, Minerva!" Filius squeaked cheerfully. "Pomona isn't here yet, I see."
"Why did she ask us here?" Minerva didn't hold out much hope that the Head of Hufflepuff had enlightening Filius about the reason for this meeting, but the possibility existed.
"Haven't the slightest idea. It's probably another mix-up with the class schedules."
Minerva shuddered. Class schedules were the teachers' worst nightmare. Compared to the horror they caused, You-Know-Who was a toddler throwing a tantrum. Not only did each teacher have to work out when each year would have its lessons, they had to ensure their schedule didn't clash with another teacher's, and there was no spell that did all the work for them.
"If it's anything to do with the schedules…" she began.
The door opened again and in stepped Pomona, Molly and Arthur. Minerva took one look at them and stifled a groan. The only reason Molly and Arthur came to Hogwarts during term-time was when the twins did something particularly outrageous, like that time in their first year when they conjured flashing signs saying "We're all DOOMED! It's true though I'm never right!" over Trelawney's head.
"What have they done this time?" the Head of Gryffindor asked wearily.
If they were lucky, it would be nothing worse than glamouring the doors so the other students thought the library was the Great Hall and the Charms classroom was Filch's office. If they weren't lucky, it would be something dangerous and life-threatening that would make the school look irresponsible, like sneaking onto the third floor corridor and being mauled by Fluffy.
"Hello, Minerva!" Arthur greeted her. He hadn't looked so upset since Charlie announced his intention to work with and live among the most dangerous creatures alive – and no, he didn't mean his brothers. "Mauled by Fluffy" began to look more and more likely. "Awful, isn't it? Can't imagine what Dumbledore's thinking!"
"That poor boy!" Molly agreed, looking furious and on the verge of tears all at once. "If he thinks he's going back there, I'll owl St. Mungo's and tell them the stress of the war has affected his mind!"
Minerva blinked. She got the feeling she was missing something here, and she didn't like it.
"Of whom are we talking?" she asked.
"Severus isn't here?" Pomona looked around the room as if she expected to see the Head of Slytherin hidden in one of the cupboards (which always stood half-open since an incident in '52 involving Dumbledore, Flitwick, and a Zonko's product). "Funny, that; I was sure – Ah, here he is now!"
Sure enough, Severus had just arrived, followed by…
"Remus! What are you doing here?"
Dear Mother and Father,
Hogwarts is just as you said it would be. Pansy Parkinson is one of my roommates and she does her best to drive me to St. Mungo's, but the other Slytherins give me no trouble.
As you may have already heard, Harry Potter is in Slytherin. He isn't bad for someone so infamously Light. Some of his behaviour is downright odd; he had to be ordered to eat a decent meal and I have it from Blaise that he has violent nightmares. Should I investigate?
That brings me to another detail. Harry Potter is a Parselmouth. So far, the only people who know are his roommates, me, Professor Snape, and you. How should I deal with this? Should I bring the subject up?
Give Aunt Bella my love.
Sincerely, Draco.
"No. No. I am not going in there. This is a terrible idea. You are not talking me into this. A herd of stampeding hippogriffs wouldn't make me go in there."
Ron glared at Draco. "Quit whining and open the door!"
Draco folded her arms. "I don't want to die horribly; my father would be most displeased."
Ron looked to Harry for help.
"You just have to open the door. You don't even have to look in if you don't want to," Harry said pleadingly. He didn't really care about what was on the third floor corridor, but Ron was determined to find out if his brothers invented their story or not, and Draco was the only one who knew a spell to open locked doors.
"No. I'm not going in there and I won't help you two do it, either. I'll tell a teacher."
"If you do I'll owl your parents and tell them you're friends with a blood traitor," Ron threatened.
"We're friends, are we? That's news to me. Resorting to blackmail; what a remarkably Slytherin tactic for a Weasley. Are you sure you're really a Weasley and not a random orphan your parents picked off the streets?"
Ron's face went white, red and purple in quick succession. Harry intervened, afraid the other boy might have a heart attack if this continued.
"Look, let's just leave it for now. Fred and George were probably making it up, anyway."
"Finally come to your senses, I see," Draco said.
Ron looked at the locked door longingly, but he was outnumbered and he didn't want to find out what was on the other side so badly that he'd go up against two Slytherins.
"Stupid idea anyway," he muttered, following them down the hall.
That was when Filch appeared around the corner. There was no time to hide.
As the caretaker frogmarched the three of them down to the staff room, Harry couldn't help wishing Dumbledore had never mentioned the third floor corridor.
"You must be joking!"
"I think it's an excellent idea," said Filius.
"You've already proved how devoted you are to Harry," Pomona said.
"You meet your own criteria," Minerva admitted grudgingly.
"I'd take him in, but the Ministry wouldn't allow it," Remus said apologetically. "But You-Know-Who himself couldn't stop me from helping you look after him."
"And we can look after him during the summer and winter holidays," Arthur said. Molly nodded her agreement.
Severus looked at the occupants of the staff room with the same horror he'd felt for the Dark Lord and his fellow Death Eaters. They wanted him – him! The spy! The ex-Death Eater who'd escaped Azkaban by the skin of his teeth! The dreaded Potions Master who'd reduced scores of teenagers to tears with a single word! – to look after Potter. His worst enemy's child. Who looked exactly like his father.
"No. Find someone else; I am wholly unsuitable for a host of reasons."
"But you're his Head of House; of all the teachers he'll be most inclined to trust you." Pomona apparently didn't realise that Slytherins had vastly different personalities to Hufflepuffs.
"We need to have a feasible plan decided on before we confront Dumbledore, or he'll reject our concerns and send Harry back to the Muggles," Filius pointed out.
Severus gaped at him. "And what is wrong with him spending his time between the Weasleys and Lupin?"
"We'd love to take Harry in," Molly began.
"They have seven children of their own; do you honestly expect them to take in an eighth?" Minerva interrupted. "And Remus is a werewolf. The Ministry would intervene if they found out Harry was spending any length of time with him, and he'd end up in the care of a family like the Malfoys."
The Malfoys, if it wasn't for their ties to the Dark Lord, would have been an excellent choice. They had plenty of room, were the second richest Wizarding family in Britain, Draco and Harry got on well, and Lucius and Narcissa would have dearly loved another child. It was just a pity Lucius took his mother's blood purity ideas too much to heart when he was a teenager and was too afraid for his wife and daughter's lives to get out when he came to his senses.
"It would only be during the school year," Filius said, "and even though you'd be on record as his guardian, we'd all help equally."
Nods all round. Severus felt he was caught in a trap he'd made for himself and he hadn't even realised it until now. All this time he'd been trying to find someone to look after Potter, his colleagues and their friends were twisting his words until he had to look after Potter.
He had a choice: he could continue arguing and lose spectacularly (and wouldn't Minerva gloat when he did?) or he could acquiesce and spend the rest of Potter's school years essentially raising the brat (shudder). Maybe he could go to St. Mungo's, give Bella a wand, and tell her he was a traitor; she might be so incensed she'd Avada him on the spot.
"Fine, but don't expect me to treat the boy any differently from the other students," he snarled.
For some extraordinary reason, everyone in the room looked smugly satisfied with themselves.
The door burst open and in charged Filch, pushing the youngest Weasley, Draco, and Potter in front of him.
"There you are, Professors," the Squib said with a grim smile. "Caught these 'uns on the third floor, trying to break into the forbidden corridor."
