Disclaimer: What do you think?
A/N: Lalala… ok, bad language in this chapter, so sorry about that! and, this may be the last chapter for a while (like two weeks or so) cuz school's almost over(8 MORE DAYS, not counting weekends!) So yeah, we have like A BUNCH of tests plus finals!
A/N 2:I think I have a thing for mental breakdowns in bathrooms (see 6th Period Nightmare) lol.
Chapter 7: Tears You Inside-Out
I sat in silence the whole cab ride back to the loft.
Shit. Shit. Shit. F-ck. Shit. F-ck! Not good! Seriously f-ck! I hate this. I can't believe this happened. I can't tell them, not yet at least, I thought my life was turning around; come on Kaila, your life can't turn around in two weeks. I thought that I wouldn't have any more problems with him, but now he has to f-cking haunt me. He has to haunt me so I can't f-cking escape him. As if what he did to me wasn't enough.
When the cab arrived outside the loft, it took me a good two minutes to get out of my weird daze before I followed the others up the steps. I walked into the room and immediately sat on the duct tape covered couch, staring straight ahead.
"Uh, hello? Earth to Kaila," Maureen swished her hand in front of my face, causing me to blink and break my odd trance.
"Yeah, what?"
"You were like, looking really creepy and just staring at the wall, you okay?" Collins asked, sitting down at the metal table.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied quickly.
"Sure," he said with a 'yeah right' attitude. He picked up a newspaper from the table and pretended to read it, but I knew he was just using it as a shield to hide his eyes so I wouldn't see him studying me, trying to read my mind.
I didn't have time to care; my focus was on getting Brad out of my head. It had been two weeks since I ran away, two weeks since I saw Brad's face, two weeks since I saw Luke's. I felt a tear run down my cheek as Luke entered my mind. Get a hold of yourself Kaila! You can not break down, especially here.
"I need to use the bathroom," I said, lying.
"Second door on the right," Collins said, pointing in the general area of the hallway. I got up and walked down the hall, leaving them in the main room.
Oh God, why am I here? Why? Cause I'm pathetic. I couldn't last three more years, only three, maybe only two if I took extra credit classes. I'm pathetic because I was scared-scared of Brad, scared of getting hurt, both physically and emotionally, and scared of love. Oh f-ck, why am I like this? Why am I being punished for someone else's mistakes? I didn't have the time or the courage to think about my past right now.
I entered the bathroom, locking the door behind me and sliding to the floor, crying.
You know what? I bet they're out there talking about me right now, saying things like "what are we going to do with her?" or "how can we keep her? We don't know anything about her?" 'Keep,' like I was some pet or something that had no f-cking clue of what was going on. Like I was happy and completely content to have somewhere to live, no matter how temporarily I stayed here.
I probably stayed there on the floor crying for a good seven minutes. I warily stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. I look like shit. My face was red and wet and my eyes were puffy. I turned the faucet on cold and let the water run over my face, relaxing myself to face them. I wiped my face with the cleanest towel I could find, and looked at myself again. Better. I unlocked the door, and went back into the main room and took back my seat on the couch.
Collins was still at the metal table reading the newspaper, Joanne was sitting at the window sill, and Maureen was sitting on a chair next to the couch. Everyone was silent. I knew they were thinking about the same thing though. They wanted to know my past. All of them-Collins, Joanne, Maureen, Mark, Mimi and Roger. They wanted to know what happened to me. I just wasn't ready to go blabbing my life story to them. It would get complicated, very complicated.
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