Chapter 7

…I walked straight into the arms of Ashley Davies. Flustered, I instantly pulled away from her, feeling embarrassed. Hoping she wouldn't notice my flushed cheeks.

"Hi Ashley," I said awkwardly as she surveyed my body with hungry looks.

"Hey, Spence, I was just going to come look for you," she said in her usual loud confident tone. "You ready?" she said, turning away from me. God, she looked gorgeous today in her extremely short skirt and midriff baring top. But then again, Ash would look great in anything she wore, or anything that she didn't wear. Oh dear, here I go again, I thought but this time I was not more disturbed by my thoughts, or rather my feelings, for Ashley than I usually was.

"Yeah, sure thing," I replied, shaking off my deep trail of thought.

"You say 'sure thing' a lot," she remarked as we walked back into the living room. Chelsea and Clay immediately stopped talking as we walked back into the living room. Making me wonder what they were talking about.

"You look nice," Chelsea said. But she wasn't looking at me when she said it. Instead she was giving Clay another meaningful look. Seriously, what was up with those two?

"So, we are going now then," I queried suspiciously. They were behaving way too sane in front of a major celebrity. But then again, they'd never been as obsessed with her like I was. Chelsea was always into her strange old country music and Clay didn't really listen to music. At all, really. Plus he didn't really read gossip magazines. Clay was all about the newspapers.

"Bye, then," I cautiously said to them.

"Nice meeting you, Chelsea and Clay, of course," Ashley said politely. Actually, come to mention it, what was up with her? Ashley usually had the manners of a feral wolf. An extremely cute wolf but a wolf all the same. It was official the whole world was behaving weirdly, well, my world anyway.

We walked in an awkward silence downstairs back to her car. I tried to start a conversation a few times but the words were on the tip of my tongue and stayed there. So in silence we stayed.

It was only when we reached the car park and Ashley motioned to the bright red convertible sitting there, that I couldn't help talking.

"Oh, my God, is that your car?" I exclaimed rather loudly.

Ashley smiled at me and replied with a nonchalant 'yeah'. This only made me more embarrassed.

"That is probably the most expensive looking car I've ever seen. How much did it cost?" I instantly regretted this as I realised how stupid and money orientated it sounded.

Ashley shrugged as a response and quickly changed the subject.

"So are you going to get in the car or not?"

"Sure thing," came my reply.

"You really do say sure thing a lot," Ash observed. Again.

"I dunno. I just do."

"Okay, calm down Spence. I wasn't demanding an explanation." I blushed at the use of my nickname as I felt my cheeks grow hot with something other than embarrassment.

Ashley pulled out of the crowded car park and I smiled at the feeling of the wind hitting my face. Ashley turned to look at me, watching my simple enjoyment of the car ride.

"Ash," I said quietly.

"Yes," she replied, still looking at me.

"Might wanna keep your eyes on the road."

"Oh, right," and now it was her turn to blush as I intently watched the red creep into her cheeks while she focused on her driving. She quickly reached over to turn the radio on. It always amazes me how she loves to be the centre of attention all the time. Yet she still gets self-conscious sometimes. I loved that about her.

One of Ashley's songs comes on and I immediately started singing along. Incredibly badly, of course. Ashley laughed at me good naturedly, shaking her head at my tuneless singing voice.

But after a glare from me, she quickly stopped laughing at me and started to quietly sing along. She sang so beautifully, I had to stop myself from gasping out loud. I had been to a few of her concerts- and by a few I mean a lot, but this was raw and pure and completely perfect. It was like nothing I'd ever heard before. The song playing was one of the few slow songs that Ash had done and with her singing along it was just about the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. It was so... I couldn't even think of a word to describe it. Thankfully I didn't have to.

Ashley had noticed me staring at her open mouthed and smiled at me, embarrassed. I looked away for a moment, feeling her eyes on me, and noticed we were in the more upper class part of LA that I had little occasion to visit.

"Are we nearly there yet?" I enquired, just wanting to break the awkward moment between us, not realising I sounded like a petulant child.

Ashley laughed.

"You sound like a little kid, Spence. But yes we are."

And in just a few more moments we were. Ashley pulled up at a huge grand looking building. But I had learned my lesson and faked nonchalance as I followed Ashley. We walked into a hallway that looked more like a fancy hotel lobby to me. I continued to follow as Ashley strode confidently into the elevator and motioned for me to follow. So I did. I was still in awe of the whole place when she inserted her key into the elevator and we rose in silence to the penthouse apartment.

Then we were in her apartment, which was beautifully furnished, but by now I wasn't paying much attention to the room. I had spent the whole ride up staring at her lips and wondering what it would be like to kiss them. But most worryingly I was pretty sure that she had seen me staring at her.

Ashley twirled around the room, "Welcome to my humble abode."

"Humble, my ass."

"Language, Spencer Carlin," Ash teased, whilst grabbing my arm and leading me to the sofa.

"So do you want a drink Spence?"

I smiled formulating my reply.

"Sure thing."

Ash grinned.

"What do you want?" she said leaning over the pretend bar in the corner of the room, revealing more of herself than she meant to. Or maybe she did mean to.

"What have you got?" I replied flirtatiously.

"Anything you like," Ashley replied, flirting back.

"Some Coke please, Ash," I said, ruining our interlude and leaving Ashley looking just a bit disappointed. As she poured me a drink followed by one for herself, she seemed somewhat subdued as she sat down next to me. Close. But not close enough to touch.

"So are you going to do this interview thing, or not?" Ash questioned, irritable. I flinched at her harsh tone. And reluctantly pulled my camcorder from my bag.

"Sure," I said, turning my camcorder on. "And remember, I want to get to know the real Ashley Davies. The person that you are not the person everyone else sees. I want the Real You."

Ashley seemed more than a little disturbed by this suggestion.

"Okay," she eyed me suspiciously.

"So, first question," I picked an easy one this time, not wanting her to get scared and run again. "When did you first realise that you wanted to be a singer?"

"I dunno. I guess I have always liked music and my dad was in the industry and so I just followed in his footsteps," Ashley spoke this confidently and looked rather pleased with her answer. I sensed that this was a well-practised and learnt answer but that wasn't what I wanted. So of course, in true professional journalism style – I glared at her until she continued talking.

She continued reluctantly, "I guess singing was the only place that I truly felt safe. Like I could be myself, you know? Like I belonged somewhere."

I smiled at Ash. And reached out to hold her hand, like I had before. It was sort of impulsive and totally unprofessional. But I just really wanted to hold her.

But instead I pulled my hand away and watched as Ashley looked at me, hurt, before wiping her face of all emotion. Stay professional, my brain said. But all my heart was saying was screw professional, just kiss her already.

So anyway, next question, "So do you have any inspiration, in terms of other artists, I mean, Ash?"

Ashley grinned again. I wasn't sure if it was because I had called her Ash or for some other reason.

"Well, my dad obviously was a big inspiration for me growing up," and then I thought I saw her eyes well up at the mention of her father, but perhaps it was just the light. "I mean, he was never around much - my dad. I'd probably only seen him a couple of time since I was five. When he left. But he always believed in music and I guess that he passed that onto me." She looked around, searching for the right words to say. "He believed that music could change the world." She laughed sadly, "That music was the most powerful thing that existed, second only to love." I could really see tears glistening in her eyes now. So against my better judgement I reached across to hold her hand again. I couldn't stand seeing her in so much pain. Seeing her hurting, it hurt me.

"We can stop now if you want." I needed more for my project but I didn't really care about that anymore. All I cared about was her. Plus, I knew that the end of my project marked the end of my friendship with Ashley. Was friendship the right word? Were we friends?

Ashley nodded gratefully and watched as I turned off the camcorder, subtly trying to wipe the tears from her face.

We sat there for a while talking about unimportant things and enjoying each other's eyes. I don't remember what we talked about, like I said, the topic wasn't important. What was important was her.

We joked and chatted. Our laughter hiding the more important and confusing fact that our hands were still intertwined. Pretending that we were just friends, but we weren't even that. I was just a girl, an ordinary, plain girl. Who was in love with one of the greatest singers of all time. I was just a girl, one of many, who so happened to have fallen in love with Ashley Davies.

It was this fact that I knew for certain as I felt pain in my heart as she dropped me back outside my flat and drove away. I ached that I could no longer pretend that it was something it wasn't. And perhaps I imagined it but as she kissed me goodnight, her lips lingered on my cheek a few seconds too long. Because some silly romantic part of me knew that deep down she loved me too.