Disclaimer: The only things I own of Glee are the DVD sets of seasons 1 & 2.
Author's Note: Yeah... that was another long wait, wasn't it? I'm really sorry about that. I've been settling in to a new place and getting back into the swing of university life after being away from school for at least a year and a half. Throw in sleep deprivation and you have a very lazy author. Plus, it was really hard to make and resolve Brittana angst. Not cool, yo. :P I hope this makes up for the wait though.
Author's Note 2: I just want to give a quick thanks to everyone who reviews. I know I send a message to everyone who reviews with a thank you but I just wanted to reiterate my gratitude here. For those of you who reviewed anonymously, I'll reply at the bottom of this chapter. Anyway, you guys are awesome for putting up with me. I promise I don't take forever to update because I want more reviews. I am just a perfectionist so it takes me a long time to get chapters exactly how I want them.
A big thank you to killercereal, my lesbro for life (even though we're both girls), and whatistheretoponderabout (aka wittpa) for putting up with my ranting and for listening to me bounce ideas around. You're both awesome and make me feel so much better when I'm close to going crazy.
After Azimio's party, the weather quickly turned from the subtle warmth left over from June to the sweltering and suffocating furnace of July. With it came a rather heated letter from Coach Sylvester demanding that all returning Cheerios attend a cheer camp starting the third week of July. That was how I found myself standing in the McKinley High School parking lot with eleven other bleary-eyed cheerleaders at five in the morning during what was supposed to be a relaxing summer vacation. I was in a mob of red and white practice uniforms, surrounded by faces I hardly recognized even though I had cheered with the same girls for little over a year. The only two faces I could point out in the small crowd were Brittany and Quinn, who were huddled together at the front of the group.
My fingers twitched when my gaze landed on the hand that rested on Brittany's shoulder; my hand should have been there, not Quinn's. Yet when Brittany looked over her shoulder and caught me in that piercing gaze, I crossed my arms over my chest, squared my shoulders, and narrowed my eyes. I watched her body sag and her eyes drop to the concrete before she turned her head back towards the charter bus. I rolled my eyes when Quinn started to rub small circles against the taller blonde's back.
I tried to convince myself I didn't care she was upset. After all, she was the one who hadn't called me since the party. What right did she have to be upset when she was the one who had chosen to avoid me? She was the reason I had spent the last two weeks lying on my couch with my cellphone resting on my chest, willing it to ring but never dialing the familiar number myself.
"Alright, ladies! It's time to prove you are all worth the prolonged suffering I go through to coach you all year!" The familiar, amplified screech brought me back to the present, which was a dark parking lot in front of the high school. Coach Sylvester stood on the top step of the bus with her trusty bullhorn obscuring most of her face.
"For those of you who are new to the Cheerio Boot Camp experience, I'm about to drop some knowledge on you. Our destination is two hours away by bus so if you think you are going to give up halfway through the training camp, I suggest saving yourself some walking by going home now." No one moved a muscle; not even after she lowered the bullhorn and stared down each and every one of us. I almost missed the twitch of her lips as she tried to hold back a smile at our dedication before she raised the megaphone once more. "Outstanding. Now get your lazy carcasses on the bus. And don't touch the driver; I don't want any of you catching failure!"
Single file, every girl in the sea of red and white clambered up the steps of the charter bus. Our shoulders were bare of backpacks and none of us carried suitcases. Sue had promised in the letter she would provide everything we needed for the two week camp. The corner of my lips dropped into a frown as I slipped into the first empty row I could find and took the seat closest to the window. Knowing Sue, we would all be wearing matching track suits for the duration of the camp.
The horrendous image disappeared from my mind when I felt the material of the seat next to me sink slightly as a warm body filled it. I looked over to find Brittany staring at the seats in front of us and my gut twisted at the blank expression covering her face. The last time I had seen that same blank stare had been in her bedroom the morning I asked her why she had slept with me. Guilt gnawed at the walls of my stomach and my hand started to act on its own, reaching towards Brittany to wipe away the neutral expression that seemed so out of place on her.
I realized what I was doing before my fingers could brush across that smooth, freckled skin and I pulled back. My fingers curled into a loose fist as I lowered my hand and let it rest at my side, my body hating me for denying the touch it was so used to giving; the one touch it needed and ached to give. I forced my gaze to focus out the window instead of on the girl sitting next to me as the bus lurched forward. It was easier said than done since the silence between us was roaring in my ears louder than the bus engine that sputtered in the background.
"Shouldn't you be sitting by Quinn?" I asked as we pulled out of the parking lot. The hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention and I turned away from the window to find her staring at me with her head tilted to the side. "Well?"
"Coach told me to sit here. She wants us to fix her chain," she explained, her voice void of emotion. Her bright blue eyes never left my face and I momentarily squirmed under the gaze before I remembered exactly who I was. I was Santana Lopez and no one was supposed to be able to make me squirm; not even Brittany. So, I matched her intense gaze with one of my own which made her sigh and look down at her lap as she drew patterns on her bare thigh. "Can we stop being upset now? I miss you," she asked in a voice just above a whisper and my eyes widened slightly.
"You miss me?" There was a slight nod of her head but she didn't look up from her legs. "If you missed me so much, you could have shown it a little better and called or texted. Hell, Brittany, you could have sent a letter. But you didn't do any of those things," I pointed out as I turned back to the window and watched the dark buildings pass by.
"Santana-"
"Don't. Just don't, okay?" I cut her off before she could list off whatever excuse she had planned. Mainly because I knew I would believe anything she said and I would forgive her for dropping out of my life after the party. "I obviously wasn't good enough for you to talk to after I slept with Puck so don't try talking to me now."
Silence floated between us once more and I could hear her shifting in her seat, most likely turning away from me. It took half an hour for her to break the silence with softly spoken words.
"You never called me either." I doubted I was supposed to hear her. Brittany most likely thought I was asleep since I had my head pressed against the window pane and my eyes were closed. She proved me right when the smooth skin of her fingertips brushed against my forehead as she moved some of the bangs out of my face. I resisted the urge to lean into that small touch I had missed since we had been apart. Her warm breath suddenly tickled my neck and the inside of my ear as she whispered, "I just want to be us again," and then pulled away once more. I fell asleep trying to ignore the way my skin still tingled in the places her breath had caressed.
I was painfully awakened when my head bounced against the window after the bus hit a large pothole. I couldn't stop the Spanish curse from tumbling out as I rubbed my forehead and tried to chase away the stinging sensation. Not long after I recovered from the blow to the head, the bus jerked to a stop and Brittany and I were thrown against the seats in front of us. Judging by the sound of shrieking girls and several swear words filling the air, we weren't the only ones who had been thrown from our seats. After I pulled myself back up, I looked out the window to see where the idiot bus driver had brought us.
At first, all I saw was a dirt road surrounded by woods. I started to wonder if we had blown a tire or run out of gas since we were in the middle of nowhere. Then I spotted the golf cart chained to one of the sturdier looking trees. My stomach dropped when I saw a sign that read "Property of the One and Only Sue Sylvester," in large, block letters resting on its hood.
"Off the bus, meat bags! Hustle!" Sue's amplified voice echoed through the bus and each girl hurried to do as the woman commanded. We unloaded in the same single file manner we had boarded with Quinn leading the group. Once everyone was off, we came to a halt and stared at the broad side of the bus. Coach Sylvester had opened the suitcase compartment and it was filled with several large, dull green packs. I watched as she pulled one out and shoved it into Quinn's chest.
"Strap this on, Q, and show these girls what they will be helping me carry to the campsite," she commanded and Quinn quickly did as she was told, slipping the black straps over her shoulders with ease and stepping in front of the line of girls. She paraded in front of us, turning every so often to show off the whole accessory.
What I had assumed was just one large pack was actually three packs connected to each other. At the bottom was a tightly rolled up sleeping bag. On top of that, I noticed a long, overstuffed backpack. The last part of the ensemble was another small, horizontal pack.
"Ladies, each one of these holds a tent and all the other essentials you are going to need to survive this week." Quinn twirled to show it off once more before falling back into her spot at the head of the line. "I suggest you don't lose yours on the way to the campsite. If you do, it's going to be a very uncomfortable week for you," she warned before stepping aside so we could each grab a pack of our own. While we searched for our cargo, Sue unchained the golf cart and climbed inside. By the time she had maneuvered it to the dirt road, we all had our packs on and were waiting for further instructions.
"The last five girls to the campsite better get their abdomens ready for a work out!" With that, she started driving down the dirt road. There was a moment of hesitation before Quinn started jogging after her, followed by me and the rest of the girls. I heard the bus start up behind us and I looked back to see it pulling away, taking our last chance of escape with it. I pushed that thought out of my mind and focused on the sound of my feet hitting the ground instead of the heavy weight pressing against my back.
I had no idea how long I had been running when my legs started to burn from the exertion. Sweat seemed to cover every part of my face and my eyes burned from the droplets that slipped down into them. My chest was on fire with every breath I took and the weight on my back seemed to double with each step. I shook my head, trying to fling some of the sweat off my skin but I only succeeded in making myself slightly dizzy from the movement. The only bright side to my situation was that I was nowhere near being one of the last five girls in the group.
Quinn and I were both leading the herd of cheerleaders and I glanced over to see she was just as exhausted as I was. Her face was red and some of her hair had started to fall out of her hair tie. I doubted I looked any better. What caught my eye most, however, was that Brittany was not at her side; nor was she right behind her. My eyes narrowed and my brow furrowed as I tried to figure out where the taller girl could be. I looked over my shoulder at the pathetic girls trailing behind us and searched for the lanky blonde. I didn't find her until I looked towards the very back of the pack. She was one of the last five runners and I had to do a double-take just to be sure it was her. Brittany was one of the fastest runners I knew. So what was she doing way back there?
"You are the slowest wastes of skin I have ever seen! And I once saw a group of elderly citizens go on a march for better tapioca pudding in their nursing home!" Sue's voice echoed out from the three speakers on top of the golf cart driving beside us. I forced my gaze in front of me once more so I could pay attention to where I was running. The last thing I wanted to do was trip over a rock I didn't see because I was too busy looking back at Brittany. Looking away from her, however, did not stop me from thinking about her. Annoyed that I couldn't figure out why she was so far behind, I slowed my pace. Girls sped passed me and some of them glanced back to see what in the world I was doing.
Soon I was at the back of the herd as well and running alongside one of the taller senior girls. Her dark brown curls were matted to her forehead with sweat. Whatever strands weren't trapped against her skin were frizzing out of control because of the humidity. I couldn't remember her name but I did recognize her. Despite her height, she was often at the back of the group whenever we were forced to do running exercises so it didn't surprise me that she was so far behind.
"Is there a reason you're slacking off back here, Brittany?" I asked even though I hated myself for wasting my precious breath on something as stupid as words. Especially since the girl I was talking to didn't even acknowledge my presence. I growled slightly before I dropped back even more to run right beside her. "I asked you a question, Pierce." Her last name was a foreign word on my tongue but using it had grabbed her attention.
"It's her last year her, San," she replied as she nodded towards the senior in front of us. "I wanted to make sure she didn't have to do at least one set of crunches this year," she explained and I rolled my eyes. Just because I was mad at her didn't mean I wanted her to do crunches because of some slow-ass cow who couldn't handle Sylvester's pace. Unfortunately, there was no convincing Brittany to change her mind once her heart was set on something. So, I did the only thing I could think of. I kept running next to her.
"Don't think that just because I'm doing this means I forgive you for dropping my ass after that party," I warned her after several minutes passed by. Luckily, she didn't ask why I was doing it because I wouldn't have had an answer for her. Instead, she nodded her head and focused all of her attention on the road ahead of us. I did the same and tried to forget that my only reward for reaching our destination would be an indefinite number of sit-ups.
The sun was high above the trees by the time Coach Sylvester stopped her golf cart in the middle of a large field. We came to a halt a few feet behind her, each one of us resisting the urge to collapse. My own legs felt as if they were two twigs holding up a tree house and I prayed they wouldn't give out until Coach gave us permission to sit.
"Those of you who were the last five girls to finish, come forward," Sue commanded. Brittany and I reluctantly walked to the front of the herd followed by four other girls. The older woman looked between us with her arms crossed over her chest. Finally, she settled her gaze on me and I resisted the urge to take a step back. "Selena! Has Malibu Barbie been rubbing off on you or did they forget to teach you how to count before you hopped the border?"
"Coach, we finished together," I said as my hands balled into fists. "And I'm Puerto Rican, not Mexican," I reminded her but she had already stopped paying attention to me in favor of lifting the bullhorn to her lips.
"Take the packs off, ladies, and start setting up camp. You'll find not all of you have tents because you'll be roughing it with a designated partner whose name is on a slip of paper in your bag," she announced. "Those who don't have a tent in your pack, bring the bricks that I put in there instead to the front of my cabin." She nodded her head towards the large log cabin that stood near the tree line. Once she was sure every girl had gotten the message, she lowered the bullhorn and settled her gaze back on our small group of six. "I believe you girls owe me some crunches," she reminded us.
I bit back a groan as I slid the heavy pack off of my shoulders and let it fall to the ground. It wasn't long before I was lying on my back in the grass next to it with my legs bent. I stared up at the bright blue sky for a few seconds as I tried to prepare myself for the torture I was about to put my body through. Those precious moments did not last long enough because Sue's voice was ringing in my ears far too soon. My body responded out of pure reflex when Sue started counting out each perfectly synchronized abdominal crunch. One hundred crunches and several insults later, she finally lowered the bullhorn and I was able to fall back against the hard ground without worrying about pulling myself back up. I blocked out whatever closing insult she threw at us and closed my eyes, wishing she would leave so I could get up without her seeing how sore I was.
Once I heard Coach Sylvester's retreating footsteps, I slowly got to my feet and unzipped the top part of the pack I had been carrying. To my dismay, I found a collection of dull, red bricks instead of the pieces to a tent. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Brittany had opened her bag as well and was now struggling to attach two poles to one another. I watched her for a few seconds longer, almost smiling at the look of concentration on her face, before turning back to my bag.
I had to dig all the bricks out of my pack before I could find my partner's name. My stomach tightened when I removed the last brick and saw Brittany's name scrawled across the slip of paper that had been buried beneath the heavy blocks. I read over it three more times before sighing in defeat and slinging my pack over my shoulder once more. I trudged over to Brittany, who had already assembled the frame on her own. I dropped my bag to the ground when I reached her side and the sound made her jump.
"Sue made us tent buddies," I said with a sneer before I picked up the cover and threw it over the dome-shaped frame. I could see the small smile on her face out of the corner of my eye as I fought with the stakes and the strings. "Can you stop smiling at me like that? It's not like I asked to be partnered with you," I reminded her in a gruff voice as I tightened the rope around the plastic stake and moved on to the next one. Once every group was finished setting up their tent and securing them with the stakes, the week from hell really started.
Every cheer practice I had been to during my freshmen year was nothing compared to Cheerio Boot Camp. The sweltering heat covered us like a two-ton blanket, making each exercise twice as hard as it usually was. Whenever we did push-ups, it felt as if the entire world rested on my back. Whenever Sue demanded crunches, the air seemed to press against my chest and make it that much harder to fight against gravity. Wind sprints and suicides were done until each Cheerio had lost the contents of her stomach all over the grass. The worst part was, I didn't have Brittany by my side to take my mind off the grueling exercise.
We may have shared the same tent, but the last two weeks had left us awkward around each other. We were out of sync and it showed. Dance practice was a disaster since we couldn't seem to synchronize our actions, which threw off the entire squad. Aerial stunts were worse and often ended in a tangle of limbs. The worst drill of all came in the middle of the week when coach broke us into two groups of six so we could form two pyramids.
"Ladies, by the end of this week, you will have something you will find very valuable in the future," she announced once we were in our groups. Her hard, blue eyes scanned over each girl as she continued speaking. "I am going to give you the competitive edge you will need once you are thrown to the wolves in the real world. I am going to give you the will to win no matter what." When those cold eyes landed on mine, I refused to look away. She subtly nodded her approval before moving on to the second group and saying, "The last group standing is exempt from tomorrow's activities."
After she lowered the bullhorn, we hurried into formation. My own group consisted of three junior girls at the bottom, Brittany and me in the middle, and Quinn at the very top. We were a shoe-in to win since Quinn demanded nothing but perfection from anyone she was partnered with. Unfortunately, the promise of a day off was enough to spark a competitive edge in the other group as well. I realized the competition was going to be much harder than I thought when the girls across from us were still in a pyramid formation after an hour had passed. A wobbly, sloppy pyramid but a pyramid nonetheless.
By the time the sun started to sink, my arms and legs were starting to feel like over-cooked spaghetti noodles. Grey clouds had taken over the sky and the humid heat they brought with them did nothing to ease my aching, worn out body. Sweat was trickling into places I dared not think about and I was pretty sure I had gotten sunburned on my face.
"Santana! Keep your leg straight!" I jerked out of my thoughts when I heard Quinn hissing orders at me from above. I glared up at her even though I knew she couldn't see it before focusing on keeping my legs strong. It was easier said than done. Once my attention was drawn to the quiver in my leg, it became harder and harder to keep it locked in position. It was as if the more I thought about keeping perfectly straight, the harder my body fought against me. Just when my knees were about to buckle, however, I felt some of Quinn's weight lift from my hands.
I glanced over to see Brittany had straightened her posture a little more so she could take on more of Quinn's weight, giving me a chance to regain some of my strength. It was something we often took turns doing for one another during practice the year before. Unfortunately, the sun was starting to get to me and I took the action the wrong way.
"I can pull my own weight, Brittany. You don't have to do it for me," I snapped at her as I tugged on Quinn's leg.
"I'm only trying to help."
"Well, stop it. I don't need your help right now," I assured her in a clipped tone. "And when I did need your help, you weren't there."
"San, I wanted to be there."
"Then why weren't you? Why did you abandon me after I slept with Puck? Was I not good enough for you after that?" I asked, not noticing that my grip on Quinn's leg was starting to slip.
"Would you two figure this out later? Now is not the time to have an argument over that stupid pig you call a boyfriend!" Quinn shouted from above.
"Shut it, Fabray! This is none of your business!" I responded before returning my attention to Brittany, who was struggling to keep a grip on the foot resting in her hands. "Would you stop trying to help me? I told you I don't need you," I said before pulling on Quinn's leg once more. I quickly found out I pulled a little too hard when Brittany lost her footing and started falling sideways. Fortunately, she was able to regain her balance before she toppled over. Quinn, on the other hand, was not as fortunate. With a loud shriek, she lost her balance as well as the fight with gravity, causing a domino effect amongst our group.
She collided with me first, knocking me off my feet with her unexpected shift in weight. Brittany fell when Quinn's foot connected with her chin. Then the girls beneath us fell under our combined weight and soon all six of us were in a pile rather than a pyramid.
"It would appear we have a winner," Sue announced through her megaphone. "Those of you still standing, feel free to dismount in a way that will not make me lose my lunch and head to your tents," she told the group of girls who were still in formation before turning her attention on our mess of twisted limbs and bruised body parts. "You girls, on the other hand, owe me six sets of suicides. One set for each waste of skin that hit the ground," she announced before heading over to the familiar patch of grass I had grown to hate over the last few days. Quinn was the first to get up and, after suppressing a groan, I got up and followed her over. The other four girls reluctantly trailed behind me.
Six painful sets of suicides later, I struggled to navigate my aching body over to my tent. My slow footsteps came to a sudden stop when a hand grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. I found myself staring into Quinn's dark hazel eyes that were dangerously close to my face. I was about to tell her to choke on a breath mint but she cut me off before I could even open my mouth.
"Whatever is going on with you and Brittany, you need to fix it and fast," she ordered, jabbing her finger into my chest as she spoke. "I will not have the two of you messing up my chances of becoming head Cheerio just because you can't be civil to one another!"
"First of all, Q," I started before grabbing her wrist just as she was about to poke me again. "Keep your hands off of me. Second, whatever is going on between Brittany and me is just between the two of us, not the three of us, so keep your pristine ass out of things that aren't your business!"
"Well when you drop me on my pristine ass, things start to become my business," she argued after she yanked her hand out of my grip. "Fix it, Lopez. I don't need a depressed dancer and a stubborn bitch making me look bad," she said with narrowed eyes before shoving past me and heading for her tent. I would have chased after her and given her a real piece of my mind but my legs were already burning. I didn't want to risk them falling off altogether so I settled for cursing her under my breath as I continued my slow journey to my tent.
When I unzipped the entrance, I found that Brittany was already inside sitting cross-legged on her sleeping bag and studying the tent's thin wall. It was something she had started doing after I snapped at her for staring at me the first night we were together. I hadn't meant to sound so angry but her scrutiny had made me uncomfortable so I lashed out at her. Ever since, she made it a point to look at anything but me. Despite my abrasive attitude though, she would scoot her sleeping bag closer to mine every night when she thought I had fallen asleep.
Sometimes she would use the opportunity to just stare at me without the fear of being yelled at. She wouldn't say a word the entire time she looked me over. Instead, she would reach her hand out and lightly run it over my skin. It took a great deal of willpower to stop myself from twitching at the familiar contact. Other times, she would talk to me as if she knew I was awake; mostly about what we had done during the day and her theories on why Sue was always so angry. It was almost normal between us whenever she thought I was asleep. Unfortunately, that normalcy disappeared each morning and avoided us all day, replaced with an awkward tension instead.
That night was no different and the familiar tension enveloped us as soon as I zipped the tent shut and went to my sleeping bag, too exhausted to do anything more than pull my hair out of my sloppy ponytail before I stretched out on my sleeping bag. Even staring at the top of the tent was too tiring and soon my eyes were slipping shut. Before I knew it, I was falling asleep to the quiet sound of Brittany breathing in and out as she stared at the side of the tent.
I awoke later that evening to the sound of rain slapping against the canvas covering of the tent. A strong, howling wind whipped against our shelter, threatening to tip it over even with us in it. I jumped when a loud clap of thunder shook the ground. The noise that was closest to me, however, was the soft, tuneless humming coming from across the tent.
"Brittany, are you awake?" I asked even though I already knew the answer. The humming stopped but I didn't receive an answer. A few minutes later, I rolled over onto my side and saw Brittany's sleeping bag pressed against the wall of the tent. She had hidden herself inside and covered the opening with her pillow. When another clap of thunder echoed through the air, a whine came from the other sleeping bag and I saw the lump inside it curl into a ball.
"Britt, I heard you humming. I know you're scared," I called out to her when she didn't answer my question. Silence was the only response I received and I rolled my eyes at her attempt to give me the silent treatment. "Is this really how you're going to be then? Pretend everything is alright when you think I'm sleeping but when I'm awake and trying to talk to you, ignore me?" I asked, unable to stop the hurt from leaking into my voice as I spoke. "Fine. Go find Quinn if you're scared since I'm obviously not good enough," I said as I rolled onto my back and stared up at the dark roof.
Several minutes later, the sound of a sleeping bag sliding across the floor interrupted the sound of the rain. When I felt warm breath tickling the exposed skin of my neck, I turned once more so I was facing Brittany again. I opened my mouth to tell her she had missed her chance but the words caught in my throat when I noticed how hard she was shaking.
"I think we can connect the two sleeping bags," I suggested instead, my anger deflating altogether when I saw the way her eyes kept darting back and forth. She quickly nodded her agreement and reached towards her camping pack. She pulled out the electric lantern Coach had packed for us and turned it on so we would have a little bit more light to work with. After fumbling with the zippers a few times, we managed to get our two bags zipped into one. Soon after the small triumph, I crawled into the enlarged sleeping bag and scooted towards the edge so Brittany would have enough room for her longer frame.
"Thank you," Brittany murmured before ducking her head inside so she could avoid seeing the bright flashes of lightning that sporadically illuminated the tent. I couldn't help but smile at the action before dimming the lantern and closing my eyes so I could fall back asleep. My plans were interrupted by a soft sniffle coming from inside the sleeping bag.
I tried to ignore it. I told myself I had already been civil enough to her by offering to share my sleeping bag. I didn't need to do anything more than that. Another muffled sniffle followed it, however, and I felt my resolve crumble before I slipped further inside the conjoined sleeping bags.
"Brittany?"
"I'm okay, Santana."
"I'd find that a little easier to believe if your sniffling wasn't stopping me from getting my beauty sleep on," I pointed out. There was a long moment of silence between us before I heard Brittany shift so she was on her side facing me. It was hard to see under our covers but I could still make out Brittany's hands fidgeting in the darkness.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to keep you up," she finally whispered. I could still see her fingers playing with one another, however, so I knew there was something else on her mind. It was just a matter of coaxing it out of her.
"And?"
"And what?"
"Brittany, your fingers are fidgeting so much it looks like they're playing an intense game of tag. That usually means something is bothering you," I pointed out. The fidgeting stopped and blue eyes glared at the hands that had betrayed her before traveling back up to meet mine.
"You're more than good enough for me, San," she finally said, her gaze never wavering. "You're my best friend and I should have been there for you after Azimio's party. I shouldn't have stayed away for so long," she admitted before a rumble of thunder echoed above us and her body tensed. Even after the thunder died down, she waited a few seconds before letting herself relax slightly. "And I really shouldn't have announced to everyone that you left your underwear at my house," she quietly added on.
"No, you definitely shouldn't have."
"I hadn't actually planned on giving them to you that way to begin with. I was just going to wait until after the party," she explained as she traced a pattern in the sleeping bag's warm interior. "I just… I saw you making out with Puck and my heart was beating so hard I thought it was going to fall out onto the floor," she said before releasing a dejected sigh.
"Puck and I have been making out for almost two years now. It never bothered you before," I reminded her, trying not to think of why it would hurt her so much to see me making out with Puck.
"Yeah, I know. I guess I just thought you would have waited a couple of days after we had sex to kiss him again." The blunt words may have been said casually but I could still hear the hurt behind them. Guilt started to press down on me since we both knew exactly what happened after Puck and I had kissed. Brittany had given me something special and I had tainted it by sleeping with Puck the very next night.
"Brittany, what I did with Puck didn't mean anything."
"That kind of makes it worse, San," she pointed out before rolling away from me. I stared at her back for a moment before irritation bubbled in my chest and spilled over.
"What do you want me to say?" I asked before I grabbed her shoulder and made her turn to look at me. "Do you think I enjoyed knowing what I did with Puck didn't mean anything? That I don't mean anything? Do you think that was easy?" I took a moment to close my eyes and rein in my emotions while the thunder rolled above us. I opened them again when I felt a familiar hand resting on my bicep and found blue eyes gazing back into mine.
"You mean something to me," she told me before placing her hand under my chin and pulling me forward for a soft kiss. I relaxed into the familiar feel of her lips against mine before I remembered I was mad at her and pulled away.
"Then why did you avoid me?" I asked. When her gaze dropped away from me and focused on the ground instead, I started to fear the answer.
"I was still kind of mad at you for blowing me off for Puck," she admitted in a small voice. "I remember when you first started seeing him you told me you weren't going to stop hanging out with me just because the two of you were dating. Then, after we slept together, you told me we needed to stop hanging out while you worked things out with Puck. It hurt."
"I said that in eighth grade! How in the fuck do you still remember that?"
"I remember everything you say, San," she told me before looking up and giving me a small smile. It quickly disappeared when another loud crack of thunder shook the ground. She was about to curl up into a ball again but I reacted before she could and pulled her body against my own.
"I was a little overwhelmed that morning and I'm sorry for taking it out on you," I whispered in her ear to distract her from the sound of the storm. I frowned when I realized I could still feel her trembling in my arms. "If it makes you feel any better, I was really fucking bored during those two weeks you weren't around," I told her as the beginning of a plan started to take shape. Talking to her wasn't distracting her from the storm so I decided to try a different tactic. "See, without you around, I wasn't able to do this."
I placed a kiss against her neck as I brought my hand up to her stomach and slipped it under the white tank-top that covered her torso. My index finger started tracing circles on her abdomen as I continued to plant small kisses against her skin. I felt her muscles slowly start to relax as her focus was drawn away from the sounds outside.
"What are you doing, Santana?" she asked in a breathless voice when my hand stopped tracing patterns and started traveling towards her breasts instead. I responded by kissing a sensitive part of her neck just beneath her jawline and I smiled when I felt her whimper.
"I'm taking your mind off the storm, Britt-Britt," I told her once I pulled away from her neck. "Unless you have a problem with that?" She quickly shook her head in response and I smiled at the answer. "Good, because I really missed doing this," I said before rolling her onto her back and positioning myself so I was straddling her legs.
I leaned forward and brought my lips to hers while my hand snuck under the fabric covering her breast and started gently massaging the soft skin hidden beneath. A low whine came from the blonde before she brought one of her hands up to my face and pulled me in closer. I felt pale lips part beneath mine before a soft tongue grazed against my lower lip. I parted my own and my eyes closed as she deepened the kiss.
I couldn't stop myself from moaning when she arched into the contact and her bare thigh slid against my center. The sound was drowned out by another loud crack of thunder and I felt Brittany tense beneath me. I quickly took her mind off the storm by slipping my free hand beneath the waistband of her blue short-shorts. I spent the rest of the night giving her body a different reason to tense up even after the storm was long over.
I wasn't sure how long we spent wrapped up in one another whispering 'I'm sorry' before Brittany finally fell asleep against my side. Her head rested on my bare chest just beneath my chin and her hair would tickle my skin whenever a light breeze would blow into our tent. My brow furrowed when I felt her bangs tickle my chin for the third time in five minutes. Then I realized there shouldn't have even been a breeze if the door was zipped shut.
Curious, I pulled myself out from beneath her and maneuvered my body out of the sleeping bag. I placed a pillow under Brittany's head so it wouldn't be resting on the hard ground before I crawled over to the zip-up door of the tent. I cursed under my breath when my hand landed in a puddle right next to the entrance. After drying off my hand and getting a closer look at the door, I realized I hadn't zipped it closed all the way. I shook my head at my stupidity before pulling the zipper down all the way and returning to the sleeping bag. Brittany made a couple unintelligible noises when I slipped in beside her but she quickly settled back into a deep sleep once I made myself comfortable.
As I started to drift off into sleep though, my mind wandered back to what we had spent the night doing. To my surprise, I didn't really care that we had sex again. It felt good and was certainly a lot better than the sex I had with Puck. Besides, I had initiated it to stop Brittany from being scared. I kept telling myself that was what best friends were for; to make each other feel better when they were scared or sad or angry.
Just because I had sex with Brittany again didn't mean I was gay. I was just one friend helping out another the same way she had helped me two weeks before. There was a tiny part of myself, however, that refused to believe my mantra no matter how many times I reiterated it. I found it was easier to ignore that part rather than deal with what it was trying to tell me.
Author's Note: I totally almost wrote a sex scene at the end there. I mean, I was even in the middle of typing it up! Then I nearly had a heart attack due to what I was writing so I decided I should probably just do what I did before and fade out. :P So once again, I am sorry. This story is going to remain T because my poor heart cannot handle writing smut. I was also going to do more with the Cheerio Boot Camp but I didn't want to ramble pointlessly. Maybe I'll write a one-shot that goes on to talk about what happened during the rest of the camp. Anyway, on to the Anonymous reviews!
Crimson Joy: Sorry... It kind of was 3 months or so. :P My bad.
Liz: Thanks! I updated as soon as I could. Sorry it took so long.
Hey: Thank you for the review! I'm glad you find it heartwarming. :) As for the lack of a sex scene in chapter 5, the only thing I found anti-climactic about it was that you didn't get to see the girls actually climax. :P I thought I did a well enough job portraying their emotions before and after without actually having to show what was going on. Like I said in that chapter, me writing smut would be a train wreck so it was just better for me to leave it out.
