Title: Worst Case Scenario VII

Author: TracyT

Rating: T

Category: Angst, Romance

Summary: In the blink of an eye it all went horribly wrong.

Spoilers: None.

Archive: Yes, please

Feedback to:

Disclaimer: Not mine, but I wish they were. No profit will be made on this. It was a labor of love.

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"Gone?' Kate's heart clutched painfully. Jesus God, Alexis couldn't mean…? "Alexis, what do you mean, gone?" She couldn't keep the horror from her voice.

"I went to the rest room and came back and he was gone. He must have pulled out his IV himself, there was some blood on the bed. His clothes are gone and no one can find him," she sobbed.

Kate was on her feet, relief making her almost dizzy. "Why would he do this? Where would he go? Why would he leave?" Her mind was still in shock and not processing this information very well.

"He was really upset after he talked to you today. For some reason after that, he stopped using his pain pump. Neither Gram or I could talk him into using it, and he just got worse and worse. We could tell he was in pain, but he wouldn't take the pain meds. At one point Gram reached over and tried to push the button for him, but he snatched it away from her and told her not to do that again. Later he tried to sleep, but I don't think he really was. Since he's been doing a little better, Gram decided we would take turns spending the night with him. It was my turn, but Gram was going to stay tonight, anyway, since he was in such bad shape, but he told her to go. He wasn't very nice about it." Alexis sniffled.

Kate was moving around her bedroom trying to get dressed. "I'm sure the pain had something to do with that."

"That's what Gram said. Kate, where would he go? "

"Would he go back to the loft, do you think?"

"I don't know, I don't know" Alexis sounded frantic. "Kate, what should I do?"

"Have you tried to call him? Does he have his phone with him?"

"No. After he talked to you today he was so upset he threw it at the wall and broke it."

Kate digested that silently. She took a deep breath.

"Listen, I'll take care of it, Lex. I'll find him, I promise. I'll call you when I do."

"Kate, no, I can't just sit around and do nothing." She was calmer now, but to Kate's ears she was still very shaken.

Kate sighed. "Okay, I'll come get you. I'll be there soon." She ended the call and fought back a wave of panic. He didn't have his phone. There was no way to trace him. In his condition he could be lying injured someplace and they would have no way to find him. Where would he go? Dear God he could be…

She tried not to give in to the tears, breathing heavily. She got her shoes on, grabbed her phone and wrenched her front door open—and there he was, leaning against the outside wall, looking like death.

They stared at each other silently for a few seconds and then she moved forward and took him in her arms and held him as tightly as she could, relief making her weak. "Rick." She wanted to sound stern, angry, but it came out in a whimper.

She felt his good arm come up around her. After a moment he said huskily, "You're shaking."

She pulled away from him to look into his face. 'You scared the hell out of me. What were you thinking? You're in no shape to be leaving the hospital like that. "

"I won't let you push me away, Kate." He looked into her eyes with an almost grim look. Before she could answer, something passed across his face. He grimaced, leaned forward to put his forehead against the door jam and ground out, "Ohhh, fuck." He closed his eyes against the pain.

"Rick," Kate felt a little helpless. She hovered near him but she was afraid to touch him in case she hurt him more. When the spasm of pain seemed to have passed, she took his arm and led him to the couch, helping him down onto the cushions.

"Lie back," she tried to help him, but he shook his head.

"No. Not yet. Hurts too much." He was breathing a little heavily

"God, Rick, look at you. You need to be in the hospital. Why would you stop taking your pain medication?"

He looked a little surprised. "How do you know about that?"

"Alexis called me when she found you gone. She was hysterical, by the way. Nice thing to do to your daughter. I'll call her as soon as I call an ambulance for you." She took her phone out to make the call when his hand closed over her wrist.

"Yes, to Alexis, no to the ambulance," he said.

"Rick…"

"Kate, I didn't drag myself all the way over here to be taken back to the hospital before I can even talk to you. Besides, you call an ambulance to your address at this time of night and the press will be all over it."

He was probably right. Kate gave him a look and dialed Alexis's number. Alexis was so relieved when Kate told her that Rick was there, she broke down crying again. Kate let Alexis talk to Rick, who tried to sound better than he was. He promised he'd come back to the hospital after he talked to Kate, apologized profusely for scaring Alexis, and finally ended the call.

Kate watched his fist clench against his leg and knew he was hurting again. "You never answered my question. What's with not taking your pain meds?"

Rick looked at her silently for a few moments. "After I talked to you today, I knew I had to see you face to face and I would have to be the one to come to you. The morphine makes me sleepy and out of it, so I stopped taking it to get it out of my system before I made the big break, so I could function."

Kate shook her head, astounded at what he'd put himself through just so he could see her. "You are unbelievable."

He reached over and took her hand. "I mean it, Kate. I'll do whatever it takes so you don't shut me out. I know you're scared, but I'm not letting you go. You're way too important to me."

Kate sighed. "Rick, you think you're not just as important to me?" He just looked at her, so she took his arm. "You are. If you weren't, I wouldn't have done what I did today."

"Yeah, about that. I seem to recall someone telling me we were going to grow into little old people with a gajillion kids and grandkids around us, and suddenly you're walking away?" He tried to sound flip, but couldn't hide the hurt in his voice.

She leaned her head against him. "The important part is you living long enough to become a little old guy," she said. "It's my job to keep you safe until then."

"No," He said softly. "That's not your job. I can look after myself."

She glanced at him. "Clearly."

He smiled for a moment at the sarcasm in her voice, and then his smile faded. "Something happened to change things, didn't it? What is it?"

Kate sombered and in fits and starts told him about the bullet that had passed through him and injured her. She couldn't keep the horror from her voice or the tears that rolled down her cheeks. He pulled her to him and held her. "So that's what scared you so badly. Kate, honey, I'm so sorry."

Kate pulled back and swiped a hand across her face. She lay her head back on his shoulder and said softly into his ear, "Rick, listen to me. You want the truth? Here it is. When my mother was murdered it nearly killed me, too. I was only 19, but it almost did me in. When I decided to join the police force, suddenly I had a purpose in life. A mission to help people who had been though what I had gone through, and it saved me, it really did, but at the same time, all the hopes and dreams I had for my future were pushed to the side so this new purpose could take their place. For a very long time, my life was a very serious matter. I lived for my job and any personal life took a back seat to my career.

Then one day," she said slowly, smiling against him. "This crazy clown came into my life and insisted I have some fun, whether I wanted to or not. Darn him, he wouldn't take no for an answer." She felt the breath he huffed against her. She pulled back to look into his smiling eyes. She gave him a mock frown. "I was very angry at this, that someone would upset my carefully established life, but…"

"But?" He raised an eyebrow.

"But eventually I found myself giving in to this clown. I did have some fun, and you know what? I kinda liked it."

He smiled at her. "You did?"

She nodded. "Mmm hmm. Pretty soon, I found I started to really like this crazy clown, too. He became very, very important to me. Indispensible, really. And you know what? All those hopes and dreams I'd pushed aside all that time ago? They started to come back into my life. I thought they were gone for good, but they really weren't. The clown brought them back with him when he came waltzing into my life."

Rick turned his head and kissed her cheek. "And may I say how important you are to this crazy clown as well."

Kate became serious again. She took his hand and brushed the side of her thumb back and forth across it. "You remember what I said at the beginning of my story about my mother's murder almost killing me?" She felt him nod against her head. "Well, I survived, but it was a close call. It's been ten years and I am still reeling from her death. The reverberations are still buffeting me every day, but I'm still here." She gave him a watery smile. He squeezed her hand.

"Rick, I survived losing someone very important to me, but I don't know if you realize how precarious my position still is. You say you know how scared I am. I don't think you do. I love you so much. You are so important to me, if anything happened to you, if I lost you, I …" She looked into his eyes and shook her head. "I wouldn't survive it this time. I wouldn't want to survive it this time. It would destroy me."

Rick pulled her close and just held her. After a few moments he said, "No. No it wouldn't. I fully believe you would survive because of who you are." He pulled back to look at her. "Kate, I could be hit by a bus on the way to get coffee tomorrow. We can't predict what's going to happen when we get out of bed every day. The most we can do is live our lives to the fullest and hope for the best. I love you, too, and I plan on spending as much time as I have left on this planet with you, showing you how I feel about you. We have to pack in as much time together as we can. We can't sit around trying to cheat fate, and we especially can't do it by being apart. Don't you see?"

Kate leaned against him again. "How can I go to a crime scene from now on and not be scared to death that something will happen to you?"

"By just doing it. After the first one where nothing happens, it will get a little better, after about twenty of them, it will just be routine again. You can't keep me safe 24 hours a day, Kate, I can't keep you safe all that time, either, although I want to. You have to realize this was an odd, isolated incident." He grunted, and his face screwed up in pain again as he doubled over.

Kate felt helpless. "Rick, tell me what to do. I don't know what to do. You need to be back at the hospital where they can give you some pain medication."

Rick pointed at something on the table. The tequila bottle. Poor man's pain killer. Kate got up and grabbed it and started to pour it into a shot glass. Rick shook his head. "Just give me the bottle." He took it and took a swig. After a few more, he felt good enough to lie back on the couch. Kate covered him with the quilt and sat down by his feet. She put her hand on his covered feet and said, "Rick, you really need to be back at the hospital." She repeated herself.

Rick took another drink. "Listen, I have a friend who just happens to own a private ambulance service. If you call him he can be very discreet. I'll show you his number on my speed dial. Oh, wait."

"Yes, I hear you smashed your phone against the wall today, Mr. Castle. Very mature." Kate raised an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah, I seem to recall something had really upset me." She pinched his leg gently.

"He's in the phone book, too. His name is Jeremy Bleaker." He took another drink and closed his eyes.

Kate sat quietly just watching him. She was happy to see him fall into a doze after a while and reached over to gently remove the tequila bottle from his grip. He opened his eyes. "Kate," he said softly.

"Hmm?" She put the bottle back onto the coffee table.

"You're really beautiful, you know that?" His words were a little slurred.

"Okay, enough tequila for you. You're hammered."

He grinned. "I kinda love you, you know."

"Yes, and you love the tequila bottle and the coffee table and the lamp, too, right?"

Playing along, he said, "Why, yes, how did you know?" Kate grinned and leaned down to kiss him softly on the mouth.

"But not as much as you." He added.

"Good to know. I can't believe you did this tonight." She shook her head in disbelief.

"I told you. Whatever it takes."

Kate sighed. "Go back to sleep. I'll call your friend in a few minutes. Are you warm enough?"

"Ye…no." He shook his head adamantly.

"Okay, which is it?" She put her hands on her hips.

"I'd be warmer if you'd lay down with me." He waggled his eyebrows. Kate narrowed her eyes.

"No funny business, honest." He said.

"I don't think you're up to any funny business, mister."

"See? Perfectly safe."

Kate looked at him doubtfully. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't. Hammered, remember?" He turned back the quilt in invitation.

Kate took off her shoes and carefully settled against him. They both sighed. Kate remembered her wish earlier tonight to hold him again. Unbelievably, her wish had come true. She lay her head on his good side and breathed him in.

"Is this okay?" She asked softly.

"Perfect." He kissed her head.

They lay quietly for a bit, and Kate thought to herself that his behavior tonight was clear evidence that the wild little boy Martha had described to her, the one who dove headlong into trouble at every turn, was still very much present today. Lord, what was she thinking? What about the much more recent incident with the police horse and Rick au naturel, not to mention some other stories he'd told her? She really needed to get the details from him about that sometime. Thinking about his earliest escapades, though, she murmured, "So, Spider Man swim trunks, huh?"

Rick frowned at her. "I'm sorry. Non sequitur. I know I've had a bit to drink but I have no idea what that means." Kate explained to him that Martha had told him the story about his jumping off the garage roof.

Rick laughed. "Oh, well, Spider Man is da bomb, you know. She told you that?" Rick smiled.

"And about the tower you constructed." Kate murmured. She thought it best not to bring up the time he got beat up.

"That, too? Wow, she really was worried about me. Did she tell you about the home-made zip-line I made using the clothes line that was strung between our third story apartment and the one next door?"

"God, no. What happened?"

"Oh, not much. It was just a minor concussion."

"Lord, your poor mother." Kate shook her head. Without thinking she said, "I wonder if our kids will be like that?"

Rick grinned. "Well, there's just one way to find out." He leaned over to kiss her, but pulled back with a slight grimace. "Ow. Maybe not right now."

Kate put a hand on his chest. "Yeah. The moves will have to wait until you're a bit better, Casanova"

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"Kate," Rick's voice woke Kate sometime later. She drew in a deep breath as she awoke and looked up at him. He was clearly in agony.

"Rick." She nearly fell off the couch in her haste, trying to get off of him. "Okay, it's time, I'm calling your friend."

"First give me the bottle." Rick reached out for the tequila bottle again.

Kate frowned. "I don't know if you should have more liquor."

"Jesus, Kate, this is killing me. Please?"

Because she couldn't bear to see him suffer, she handed him the bottle but worried she was doing him more harm than good. She went to the kitchen and got the phone book and looked up Rick's friend. In the yellow pages she looked up the section for ambulances, and there it was, 'Bleaker Medical Transport.' She called the number, and although it was 4:15 in the morning the phone was answered on the first ring by Jeremy Bleaker himself.

"Mr. Bleaker, my name is Kate Beckett, I'm a friend of Richard Castle."

"Oh yes, Detective Beckett. Please call me Jeremy. How can I help you?" 'Detective Beckett?' He seemed to know a lot about her. She explained the situation, and Rick's current condition, and Jeremy asked for directions to the back entrance to her building and promised he'd be there in ten minutes.

Kate disconnected the call and went back to Rick. "Jeremy said he's on his way, but he told me to stop you drinking any more tequila. He said the combination of the pain killers he's bringing and the alcohol could produce some very nasty side-effects."

Rick looked almost gray in the face and he was shaking. "'Kay." He held the bottle out to her and she took it, then she took his hand and held it.

"How bad is it?"

He tried to smile. "On a scale from one to ten? Ten being the worst? A fifteen."

She squeezed his hand and brushed the hair from his brow gently with her other hand. "I hate to see you suffering like this. There's a reason you were in the hospital, you know."

"I know, but I had something very, very important I had to do tonight."

Kate shook her head. "What am I going to do with you?"

He raised his eyebrows. "Ooh, do tell."

She gently smacked his hand. "Okay whatever tequila you managed to get down is clearly in effect if you're twisting my words into something sexual."

He grimaced for a moment, squeezing her hand tighter and said, "Just trying to take my mind off things."

Just then there was a soft knock at the door. Kate gave Rick's hand a pat, and got up to open the door. A man in his late thirties with smiling blue eyes and curly blonde hair greeted her with a grin "Detective Beckett? I'm Jeremy Bleaker."

Kate smiled. "Nice to meet you face to face, Jeremy. Rick's just in here."

Jeremy pulled the gurney into the room, followed by two men with EMT badges on their jackets. In no time they had Rick's vitals taken, and had him up on the gurney. Jeremy gave him a shot of a pain killer he promised was "the good stuff." Holding Rick's hand, Kate could see the tension leave his face as the pain killer took effect, and his hold on her hand relaxed as well, although he didn't let go.

They took him down in the elevator, and then headed for the back entrance to Kate's building. Rick never let go of Kate's hand.

It was nearly dawn, the early light of day. As the doors to the ambulance were opened, no one noticed the photographer hunched down behind a nearby dumpster, or the whirring of his camera as he took multiple shots as Rick was loaded into the ambulance, Kate following close behind.

TBC