Chapter 7. Ok, guys. I'm not kidding when I say that this is very emotional and TRIGGERING. Hope you'll like it.
*WARNING: THIS STORY IS VERY TRIGGERING. INVOLVES SELF HARM, DEPRESSION, AND SUICIDE. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
- - - - - - HIGHLY INTENSIVE CHAPTER. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! - - - - - -
May 21, 2016
Blossom's POV
The next week went by like a blur, my mind erasing all of the pain I'd been through and ignoring the stares aimed at me day after day. After my outburst, I had become bombarded by questions and rumors from all sides; surrounded by the whispers and lies.
Before now, I had never realized how many people were in my school. Wide-eyed students lined the corridors, curious members of any cliques watched me at my usual lonely table in the cafeteria. Even the teachers and staff had heard of the cruel joke played on me, keeping me behind after lessons to ask if I needed any support. It seemed that there was only one person left who wasn't dying to know all of the details or ask for my opinion on something- Brick.
Even hearing his name brought tears to my eyes, and walking home wasn't an ideal place to cry. There was still a week left until I could finally leave high school forever, yet the gossip and teasing made it so much more difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I slipped down a dark alleyway, choosing to avoid the busy streets and take the long way back to my house. It would add an extra 20 minutes onto my walk if I went around the town centre, but this way I would only pass one popular hangout for high school kids on a Friday afternoon. There wouldn't be anyone at home to miss me, and now didn't seem like a good time to be harassed by more teenagers on the street.
There were still people who gave me a second look as I passed by, all wondering when I'd finally have the breakdown they had been waiting so long for. It was true that I still hadn't really cried over this, I simply chose to push myself forward and hold myself together with a smile and a wave at those who least expected it. The best revenge is to kill them with kindness.
Shouts came from the other side of the pavement, words like "freak" and "loner" piercing my mind. How did it get like this? Before the incident, name calling wasn't a huge problem. Obviously there were bullies, there are in every school, but it was suddenly as if the entire student body was against me. Then again, Brick was captain of the football team; a popular jock who anyone would stick up for, especially against someone like me.
Sneaking a glance across at Paul's Pizza Place, I almost choked on a breath when I saw the familiar faces of the football team. Mitch and Mike were the first to turn and watch me as I passed, still proud of their stunt. Their cheers and shouts increased, now aimed at me, but I simply flashed the boys a smile and looked away to hide the tears still threatening to fall.
I noticed that he wasn't with the group as he usually was. Though Brick never did torture me with the rest of his friends, he never said a word to stop it, hurting me even more. Couldn't he just torment me with everyone else? At least then I'd feel like the pain was worth something; I would know he's the same as the others.
What felt like a thousand years later was actually just a few minutes, and I was finally on the path leading towards my house. All that surrounded me now was trees, leaves and the open air, following me as I meandered back to my own safe haven. Though my family were rarely at the house, it still made me feel like I had somewhere that I could be myself. I could scream, cry and rant as much as I want, even if I had nobody to hold me and tell me it would get better.
Wandering through the door, I was met with the same emptiness and silence that had been my only company since I was a small child. My dad had been nothing more than strangers to me, occasionally sitting me down for dinner or buying me a cheap gift from a convention somewhere far more exotic than the plain, boring Citiesville. I wanted to hate them for abandoning me, but who could blame him? I wouldn't trade a lifestyle of fame, money and traveling for anything. Besides, after the events that have occurred on August 29, 2014, I couldn't blame him.
Flashback, August 29, 2014...
The Professor was at home, washing the dishes. I came in the room when he looked at me.
"Blossom, do me a favor and go to the grocery store. I have a feeling we ran out of tomatoes." I laughed as I kissed the Professor's cheek. He was always the sweet one. Being the busy scientist he was, he had bags under his eyes, and looked like he was going to pass out.
"Yes, sir! I will be back with the freshest tomatoes ever! But, you should get some rest, Professor. You look tired." He laughed as he kissed my cheek. Considering I was only sixteen years old, I had always had the creative mind. I was on her way to the store, on foot. It was a good thing I wasn't wearing sandals.
It was Friday and many people are out. I haven't seen my sisters, Bubbles and Buttercup, for a while. They were everything to me. Other than the Professor, my sisters practically revolved around me. They were on vacation, and were in Los Angeles because of a concert. I couldn't wait for them to get here. Today was the day they were supposed to come back.
As I made my way, I saw a huge Toyota truck ramming into a passenger's side of a car. It rolled over several times, breaking glasses and inflating the safety bag. Blood was pouring out of the car. I was watching the entire incident as I flew my way towards it. It was a pretty traumatic accident. Many people were shocked as they made their way towards it. I heard the wailing sirens that many people dreaded. Being the superhero I was, I needed to help people who needed saving, and in that moment that's when I saw it.
There were two girls in the car, and their arms were bent in a weird position. I was confused by how it got that way, but it didn't look very pretty. It was hard to see what kind of car it was because of the damage. Its trunk was open, and it appeared to be suitcases falling out. I knelt down in front of the driver's seat to take a closer look. Horror overwhelmed me as tears reached my eyes.
I was screaming, and desperately calling for help. Everything seemed like a blur as the police officers grabbed my shoulders, telling me to calm down. I felt like I was falling apart, piece-by-piece.
I cried, not because a citizen died (Well, I would've, but not as anguished as this as this), not because the car was ruined, not because my ears felt like they were bleeding.
I cried, because that was when I saw the familiar friendship bracelet that was always worn by my green-eyed sister, on the driver's arm.
I lost both of my sisters that day, and that was when everything started going downhill. I didn't even bother to use my powers anymore.
End of Flashback...
Reaching the entrance to my house, I stared at my reflection in the mirror, looking closely and pickling apart every single flaw I could see on my face. All of the blemishes, scars and mistakes that were permanently etched onto my face were countless, and only made my mood worse.
"Look at me," I laughed. "I'm nothing. Why would anyone really love me?" My smile was faltering, finally being about to leave my face as the mask I put on everyday was torn away for good.
"No more pretending." I whispered, and there was no time to stop myself before my fist came into contact with the second image of myself, staring back at me in the glass.
The sound of shattering could be heard from across the building, and shards of glass were tossed around like it was nothing. I could hardly feel the pain coming from my feet as I walked through the broken pieces, feeling numb and weightless, letting my body lead me wherever it wanted to go. I couldn't hear myself think over the voices in my head, screeching and causing mayhem in my brain.
My feet carried me up the stairs, and I could see the journey of my life in pictures, lining the corridors. It was painful to see; photographs of me as a child laughing and smiling with my dad and my sisters, playing dress up with my childhood friends, the images only getting lonelier and darker through the years. Over time, my family began to leave the frames and my friends were books and dreams rather than real people.
My back hit the door as I slammed it closed, locking me in the white room as if someone was coming to save me, and I wanted to ship them out. However, the truth was that nobody wanted would come to my rescue, I was alone as ever with only mind and thoughts to keep me company. Not that the voices in my head were good friends- all they did was break me apart, piece by piece, telling lies and giving me false hope.
I had lost every part of the happy child I used to be. Now what am I? The empty body of a girl who died years ago? I'm the paranoid teenage girl you hear about in the movies, tired and waiting for freedom in death. I'm the long, confusing book you read once for class, and never opened again, left on the shelf to gather dust for years to come. I was stuck in a constant was with the world and everything in it, trying to blend in, but at the same time, wishing I could stand and scream for help from the top of the tallest building
"Stop crying," I said to myself. "You're being pathetic."
My head raged with the storm, anger pulsating through my body. Why did this always happen to me? I had always lived a good life, and no matter what disasters were sent my way, I remained the happy, positive girl on the outside my family longed for me to be. The thing is, I was never the person anyone wanted. Never pretty enough, funny enough or popular enough. Never good enough.
Thoughts and images swirled through my mind, a lifetime of bullying and torture slamming into my brain. Suppressed memories forced their way back inside and broke every will I had built around my heart.
Is this what my life had become now? An endless cycle of putting on a fake smile, facing myself to get better than being knocked right back down?
My heart stung with the memories of the best times we had together. Before the fallout, Brick was my best friend, and I could never erase the happiest moments of our friendship. Thought it was his fault I was more broken than ever, every real smile I had allowed onto my face and every laugh that escaped my lips in the past few weeks were all down to him. Flashbacks filled my brain and took me back to better times.
The unexpected storm that happened only a week after I'd decided to let him in, when he forced me into the street to dance together. The day I spent at his house baking in the kitchen, which turned into a full on food fight, which we rushed to clean up before his parents got home. Visiting the winter fair, running away from angry security guards when we broke in to the park after hours, hiding in the bushes from our classmates, who we both agreed were more annoying than anything.
With each memory, my heart broke even more. The mere though of him being by my side again was enough to tear every rope I had wrapped around my broken pieces in an attempt to hold them back together. I had never fallen apart so much. My screams echoed through the house, only accompanied by the sobs falling from my mouth. I prayed for this to be a dream, for everything to end. I clutched my head, keeping my eyes shut in the hopes that when I opened the, my best friend would be back at my side, promising it was all just a nightmare.
In a matter of weeks, I had grown so close to Brick, and it took complete heartbreak and hour of crying to realize that I never needed to be fixed by anyone else. I couldn't trust anyone, not anymore. I had myself, and that's all I would ever have. I needed to trust myself and stop falling for stupid tricks and lies, which is exactly what I'll do
It would be so easy to force my fingers down my throat, or drag a blade across my skin once again, especially for a guy who messed me up just to have fun. Brick would only be getting what he wished for.
Maybe tomorrow would be bad, and that day after that and the next few weeks, but after that, who knows? One day, things would be good, but for now, all I could do is break down and cry for help. For now, I can blend in and hide in the shadows, eating alone everyday.
For now, I can be invisible, because nobody else would want to fix someone who had to handle the heaviest pieces.
Chapter 8 is coming up. Hope you liked this chapter!
