Unsure of when the ghost was going to be back, Erin and Holtzmann moved as quickly as they could to get their packs. They both felt much better with their equipment back, Holtzmann checking to make sure nothing was damaged or altered, though her diagnostics had to be abbreviated by Erin, who reminded her they were on a time crunch. She made sure, at the very least, that Erin's pack was in working condition, giving her a thumbs up. Her own pack would have to get a check up later, but she was comfortable knowing that at least Erin was armed and able to protect herself.

The basement of the library was large and mostly empty. The walls were made of stone, with large, thick pillars that supported the old, Victorian building above. It was cool and dark, with only lights strung together and draped through the rafters to light small pools in certain areas where things were stored. It was interesting to see the way the library had not added any new features or electrical lights in the basement, and seemed to work around the darkness by only storing things under the limited lights. They had so much more space, but most of it was wasted.

There was probably a reason no one ventured into the darkness.

Having met that reason, and finding him very unpleasant, Holtzmann was not interested in going out and finding him again in that moment. Once they were out of the basement, which seemed to be his domain, and back up where they could gain some footing back, then she would start thinking about how to catch him and make sure he was locked away for good.

"The stairs," Erin pointed, and Holtzmann followed her up the stairs. They expected to find a door into the library at the top, but instead were greeted by a wall that matched the rest of the basement. Erin put her hand on it, but it was solid.

"Give it a proton blast," Holtzmann said, elbowing Erin's pack, "if it's a projection or a manifestation of that jerk's power, the pulse will disrupt it."

Erin nodded, stepping back and making sure Holtzmann was behind her before firing a small burst of her proton gun at the wall. She did not sustain the beam long, just enough to see that it was doing nothing more than charring the rock of the wall. It was otherwise unchanged, and Holtzmann clicked her tongue behind her teeth in disappointment.

"Really wanted that to work," she sighed, leaning on the rail of the stairway and looking back into the basement. The far end was completely shrouded in darkness, giving the space an endless feel. She did not want to have to make a trip down that way, but something told her they were still being led around by the nose by this ghost.

He let them reunite, and was not bothered by the idea of them getting their gear back. He was testing them, or simply playing with them. Either way, he was still in control. She looked up, contemplating the ceiling, and the chances of successfully blasting a hole through to the other side. It would be impossible to climb out, even if they could somehow generate enough power to blast through, and there was always the risk of hurting someone on the other side. If there was an other side.

"There's got to be another way out," Erin said, moving back down the stairs. She was sticking to the light, as the library workers were apparently prone to do, but Holtzmann walked through the gaps in the pools of light without any apparent anxiety. She was tired of being afraid of this ghost, and carried herself fittingly.

"What do you want to bet the only way out is that way," Holtzmann cooed, pointing toward the dark end of the basement. Erin frowned, but nodded her head, thinking the same thing. He made a show of retreating that way, and she could recognize a trap when she saw one. Most of the time, anyway. She was just hoping that maybe he was not as thorough as he seemed, or talked a big game without any follow through. So far, it seemed like he was as good as he wanted them to believe.

"But what else is going to be that way," Erin asked, though it was meant to be rhetorical. Holtzmann strode by her, patting her on the butt as she went, jarring her out of her musing and making her blush furiously. She quickly realized that was the intention: somehow, Holtzmann was making this feel normal. Like any other mission they went on. It made her feel a little more comfortable, and a lot more confident, and she was thankful for that. Somehow, Holtzmann always knew when to pull her punches, and when to show her strength. Even if, sometimes, Erin had trouble knowing which was which.

Erin followed Holtzmann into the darkness, focusing on the red glow of her proton pack and using it as a light source as she fell into step only a foot or so behind her friend. The further they walked, the darker it became, and Erin quickened her pace as the light from Holtzmann's pack began to fade even as they remained the same distance apart. Even as she felt like she was getting closer, Holtzmann vanished from view.

"Holtz?" she called, but her voice felt dampened even as it left her throat, and faded in the dense air around her. She came to a stop, not sure if she should continue forward or try to turn back. Holtzmann had not stopped or turned around, or if she had Erin had not been able to see it. Erin was torn between the two choices, debating with herself and chewing on her lower lip uncertainly for a longer moment than she realized. She decided to keep moving forward at length, taking a step and being greeted by a burst of bright yellow light.

She winced, lifting her arm to cover her eyes, casting shadow over her face. The light was above her, streaming down. She felt the warmth of it now, and bumped into something as she continued her step forward. Closing one eye, looking down and letting the other one focus, she saw a podium, with a small microphone sitting on it, and cue cards with scrawled letters that looked very similar to her own handwriting. Looking up again, she found the light had softened, though the warmth had grown, and she looked up to see stage lights angled toward her from a catwalk above. Below, row and row of seats filled with well dressed men and women. They were all on their feet, clapping, and the sound reached her ears as soon as she realized she had not heard it.

Blinking, she put her hands on the podium just to steady herself, noticing now that she was no longer wearing the gear she'd left the lighthouse with. Instead, she was wearing a beautiful black dress, and her hair was pulled up into a styled but that was likely far more expensive to have done than she would ever see herself spending, but always dreamed about doing. She did not own a dress like this, either, and her breath caught in her throat as she caught sight of the necklace and jewelry she was wearing. It was all beautiful, and made her feel like she was some kind of princess.

No, this was not some sort of pageant, but an award ceremony of some kind. She saw the statuette sitting on the podium now, where it had not been before. An award in science, from thousands of colleagues, all of them clapping for her as a unique mind in the field guided by the true practice of the scientific method. Her hand shook as she reached for the trophy, and as her fingers lightly traced its base, the crowd quieted and sat down.

They watched her, expectant, eager, murmuring happily and in excitement as she stood there dumbly.

"I…" she watched them, wondering if it was too late to start imagining them in their underwear. Her nerves flared to life, and she struggled to pick up her cue cards, fumbling with them and almost dropping them. The audience laughed jovially, and someone shouted that she could do it. She smiled sheepishly and waved, which resulted in mild clapping, and she cleared her throat as she read over the first cue cards. "I am honored to be receiving this award for my work in the application of particle and quantum physics to the Paranormal-"

"Where's Doctor Yate?" a voice from the audience called suddenly.

Jarred, Erin looked up, wide eyed and confused. The audience was bathed in lights, and she could not make out faces or the source of the call.

"I don't believe she's coming… to the uhm. Paranormal…"

"What about Doctor Holtzmann?"

"Again, this is my award…"

"Yeah, but they're the real scientists, aren't they?"

Erin's heart hit her stomach at those words, and the crowd's murmuring turned darker. Whispers, unsure and almost accusing, filled the air. Erin shook her head, looking at her cue cards for help but finding them blank. She cleared her throat again, though this time it felt like she was forcing a thorn bush back down.

"I'm a real scientist, too. I've always been a real scientist. It's my work that we use to help us track and capture ghosts, to protect the city. A city, I'll remind you all, that laughed at us before we-"

"But doesn't Dr. Holtzmann build the equipment?"

"Yes, she does, but she uses the science and math that I developed with-"

"Dr. Yates, right? Weren't they building things together without you being there? While you were pretending this science you're not getting an award for didn't exist, and laughing at it just like the rest of the world? Wasn't that what you were saying?"

Erin squinted into the lights, desperately wanting to find the source of the voice, so she had something concrete to yell at. If he was wearing an ugly suit, she could at least have something to fire back at him with. She felt helpless and vulnerable, taking shots with no way to defend herself. Maybe that was because she felt what he was saying as true, and she had no defense for the cutting remarks. There was no defense.

"Y-yes, they were, but we only started hunting ghosts after I came back to…"

"Stop her from embarrassing you. Which she did anyway, and you got stuck with them. Isn't that what happened? How can you be proud of any of the work you do, when it's all based on lies and shame? You weren't considered a real scientist before, and you're still not one now. I don't think you'll ever be. You have no right to call yourself one."

"Who… who is that? How do you know any of that? This… this is just my mind. This is… this is my doubt, my lack of confidence… I'm not going to let you shake my-"

"I don't need to. You and I both know you have no faith in what you're doing. You know you're going to fail, you're going to let them all down. You're going to get them killed. You almost let Yates get hurt, in the library, didn't you? A subway worker had to take command, because you could not muster the strength to do it. You lack the skills. You're not a smart enough scientist to keep up with Yates and Holtzmann, and you're not even a powerful enough leader to support someone like Tolan. Even Kevin does a more important job for the team than you do, and he thinks the answering machine actually answers any questions left on it, and doesn't call them back."

"He does do that," Erin mumbled wistfully, though she grimaced at the idea that even he was doing more work than she was. Important work, that actually helped the team. Recently, she had been wondering just what she contributed to the team, if anything at all, and seeing them working so hard, day after day, only made her wonder if she was good enough to be a part of their team. Or if she was holding them back, pretending to be someone she was not. And never could be.

"Excuse me, not to butt in, but," a new voice joined the conversation, this one getting closer and cutting through the haze that had settled over Erin's mind. She searched through the lights of the cat walk and saw a familiar form making her way down the aisle between the seats. She stopped in the orchestra pit, which was empty, and stared up at Erin defiantly. "Jillian Holtzmann, Radio Times. I just wanted to get a quote. Why do you give a cat's tight ass what these bastards think?"

Erin stared at Holtzmann, breathing hard and realizing she was gripping the podium so tightly her knuckles had turned white, and the particle board was groaning in protest. She let go, shaking her head and wrapping her arms around herself instead.

"Because they're right-"

"No, Erin, they're not." Holtzmann said it so flatly, so seriously, Erin could hardly fathom how deep her conviction ran. She had absolutely no doubt in her voice, which was a feeling Erin rarely experienced. If ever. Confidence was not her forte, but it certainly was Holtzmann's. "And you're not, either. Stop moping and shake off this dream, or I'm going to come up there and shake you out of it myself."

"You don't understand, Holtzmann. You're a genius: you have no reason to doubt your abilities, and you can build a nuclear bomb out of a discarded dinner plate and a paper clip. I… it's different for me. I… I don't know if I can keep up with you guys any more. You and Abby work so well together, I never-"

"We don't work without you. No one does. This team doesn't. Erin, you are one of the most amazing people I know. One of the smartest. And I know myself, so that's not an easy feat. You're beautiful and you're funny. Sure, you think too much and you talk yourself out of doing anything fun, but that's just part of your charm. You're our heart. Without you, Abby and I would become super villains, and Patty would probably go back to the Subway. Except she'd be meaner, and scarier. She'd be like everyone else. You make us special, and you make us happy. Abby only does this because she's doing it with you! You know that! You never saw how sad she was, whenever she mentioned you. And it's your math that inspires me to make every crazy thing I come up with: I've never seen science leap off a page the way yours does. You have no idea, because you don't let yourself see it. You hide away from everything because you somehow think you don't deserve all this love and praise we want to give you, but you do. So shut up, get down from there, and let's go catch this goddamn ghost!"

Erin had never heard Holtzmann say so much at one time before, and she struggled to process every word. Yet each one had hit their mark, sinking deeply into her and making her shudder time and again. Holtzmann spoke with utter belief in what she was saying, not matter how abrasively she was saying it, and Erin stepped back from the podium. She looked at the trophy, then down at Holtzmann, who was unwaveringly staring at her. Seizing the trophy, Erin hurled it as hard as she could up at the lights that relentless beamed down on them, hearing something smash. She was already running to the edge of the stage, though, and leaped off of it, toward Holtzmann, as the lights collapsed and everything crashed into darkness again.