Author's Note: Hey everyone! Here we go for another chapter! This one's the one that contains the slight yaoi that I warned you about at the beginning, but as I said, it's nothing major, I guess. I'm putting up another RenxHoro one-shot today as well, called 'My Reason for Living'. If you're interested, I'd really appreciate it if you could take a look!


- CHAPTER 7 -
Control

"Hello?"

"Good afternoon, Horokeu. I trust I find you well?" came the voice from the receiver.

Anna, who had answered the call, was stood watching him expectantly. The look on her face made him feel anxious. He turned his back.

"Uh… yeah, yeah. Listen, who is this?"

The voice on the other end sounded shocked to have been forgotten. "Tao Jun, of course."

His eyes widened. How had he not recognised her voice? "Oh… sorry, Jun."

"It doesn't matter," she told him, gently. "Horokeu, I'm calling regarding Ren."

His heart sank. He should have expected it. Glancing behind him to see Anna's watchful face, he moved the receiver closer to his mouth and lowered his voice. "Go on."

"A week from now, the Tao family will be holding the traditional funeral rites for Ren here in China," Jun explained. "His family members are all obliged to attend, considering his status within the family and all."

Horo felt tearful, hearing her soft voice quieten as she spoke of her younger brother. He wanted to say something to comfort her, but could think of nothing. Instead, he remained silent, waiting for her to continue.

"I was asked by my mother to extend an invitation to you. Traditionally, the deceased's lover is required to attend, but because you do not follow Chinese customs, it isn't necessary. Whether you wish to attend or not is entirely up to you."

"Jun, I… I can't."

"Is something the matter? If it's an issue of expenses, you needn't worry; we have private jets to bring you over here, and you are more than welcome to stay with us."

"No, it's not that… thanks and all, but… I can't."

"Very well," she sounded somewhat disappointed. "I have passed on details to Anna of how you can contact me should you change your mind."

"Okay."

"Well… I shall speak to you soon, Horokeu. Best wishes."

"Thanks, to you as well."

With a click, the line went dead. Horo put down the receiver, turning with a sigh to see Anna staring at him harshly, tapping a foot on the wooden floor. "You turned it down, didn't you?" the Itako demanded.

"Yeah, I had to, Anna, I-" he cut off, shaking his head. "You wouldn't understand."

Before she got chance to pry any more, he took to his heels and dashed back to his room. He closed the door firmly behind him.

He rested his back on it, sighing once more. No, she wouldn't understand. No one could. Ever since the incident with Chocolove two days back, Horo had isolated himself, only stepping foot out of his room when he needed to.

He was too scared for the safety of his friends should he be around them too long. It seemed as though the spirit of Ren was eager to harm them as much as he was the Ainu. And although being alone made himself even more vulnerable to Ren's insults and torment, he decided that he alone being hurt was a lot better than any of the others suffering. They were innocent, he was not. The more the ghost told him this, the more he began to believe it – he himself was partly responsible for the death of his love. Nobody else should suffer but him. This was why he could not face attending Ren's funeral – being around Ren's family, putting them in danger should the spirit decide to act against him, didn't seem like a logical idea to him. And also… seeing the sorrow of Ren's mother, his father, his sister, his grandfather, his cousins… and knowing he was responsible for every tear they shed. He couldn't bear that.

"There you go again, lamenting like a fool."

He looked up, knowing what to expect. The sudden appearances of Ren's spirit came so often now, they had ceased to surprise him.

"I see you were too afraid to accept my sister's invitation."

"I just didn't feel like it," he said, irritated, and took a step away form the door.

Ren moved fast, reaching out a hand as if to push him back.

Though there was no contact, Horo felt a force push at him, as though Ren was somehow manipulating his movements. His back slammed against the door, sending pain searing up his spine.

Ren came close – very close. Where Horo should have felt the body of the Chinese, he was met instead with a chilly sensation.

Their eyes were only a few centimetres apart – had both had physical forms, they would have been square against one another. Horo almost felt as though Ren's weight was holding him against the door, though he knew it was not possible.

His terrified eyes watched Ren carefully as he felt the icy sensation of what would have been a hand on his bare chest. He did not feel the touch, just the chill as Ren's eyes fixed into his, hardened as steel. Not once did the Chinese break eye contact.

"Ren…" he started, losing the words before he even began to speak them.

The spirit said nothing, just stared back into the Ainu's obsidian eyes, his gaze cruel and uncaring. Then, in one slow, calculated motion, Ren ran his translucent hand down Horo's chest.

Horo bit his lip. It felt as though Ren was sliding a frozen blade over his skin, slicing it effortlessly… so painful. His eyes were closed, not wanting to see the cruelty in Ren's golden irises as the freezing, burning touch reached his stomach.

Horo was breathing heavy. So much fear, so much pain…

"You know, Horokeu," came the seething voice of the spirit. "Even now, I still have absolute control over you."

Horo could tell by the feeling of cold breath on the side of his face that Ren's lips were right against his ear, his words whispered quietly, but harsh.

"No matter what…" Ren's hand lingered on his bare skin for a moment, then traced a line, down and down further still, towards the inside of his leg. "…I'll always be what rules you."

Horo winced, almost screaming in pain. "Get off me!"

He took what would have been a shoulder-barge into Ren's body. With an echo of taunting laughter, Ren disappeared. Horo fell to the ground at full force.

Ren reappeared again, behind him this time, laughing still.

Horo recoiled from the impact; curling into a ball on the floor, skin still tingling with agony.

"I told you, you're nothing without me. Your life is mine."

Horo's mind span, remembering the last time he had heard those words. Your life is mine… Hao had said to Ren, just before he had… "What do you want from me now?" he said, fighting through his cries of pain. He buried his head in his hands, knees tucked up to his chest.

"I know you're afraid. You're terrified I might make you do something to your so-called 'friends'." Ren mocked, enjoying the sight of Horo curled up so defenceless on the floor.

"I…"

"I know that's why you're no going to China with my sister. That and your guilt, of course."

He began to shiver, more and more uncontrollably as the frosty touch of the spirit came over him again. He didn't dare to look, though he knew already what was happening – Ren was on top of him, pinning him down to the floor.

"I know your guilt consumes you," the spirit whispered harshly, once again into his ear. "But I also know how you can escape it."

Suddenly, the pain of the cold rushed away from him, eyes shooting open, staring into his palms. "You… do?"

"Yes, of course. And in fact, it is quite simple."

"What do I do?" Horo asked, turning his eyes to glance Ren's twisted smile, face level with his own.

Ren leant closer in, his legs straddled either side of Horo's waist. Almost inaudibly, he whispered his plan into the Ainu's ear. He moved away to admire the expression on Horo's face at the notion of this scheme.

Just as he expected, Horo's eyes were wide, face marked with realisation, but also with doubt. "What…? I… I couldn't…"

"Oh, believe me, you could. Don't you have enough reason?" he placed a ghostly hand on the side of Horo's face. "Just remember… why is it that you cannot feel this touch? Why has this been taken away from you?"

"Because…" Horo trailed off, tears stinging as he tried to touch Ren's hand, only to find his fingers slip right through.

"You know the reason. What life would you have if you carried on ignoring it? Do you think that you can live with your guilt?"

"No… it's too hard as it is…"

"Then, you must do it. I think you realise that you have no choice."

Horo was silent for a long few moments. During that time, he studied Ren's golden eyes carefully, missing their liquid-like state, and the way his violet hair fell into his irises, making the great Tao Ren look so graceful and gentle… slowly, the feeling of the burning ice came back, pressed down now on every inch of Horo's body. How he longed to reach out and touch the one he loved…

"When… should I do it?" he eventually asked.

Ren's smile was satisfied. "We will start tomorrow."


Author's Note: So Ren has put an evil plan in Horo's head. Wonder what it is? Find out next chapter!
Thanks everyone for your support, especially to Shattered's biggest fan, Godfather's Sweetheart - I'm sorry I'm killing you with suspense!