Thank you for all your wonderful comments, so glad your enjoying it here is a little more xxx
Morning had finally arrived after an extremely restless night, Kate sighed loudly she had so wanted to go after Caroline but she didn't want to make this harder for her. If she wasn't ready to accept what she felt or to accept her sexuality this wasn't going to be plain sailing. Kate went back to her phone where she had taken a photo under mock annoyance of a very drunk Caroline, she had spent half the night staring at it, talking to it as if it was the real thing. She had never felt this strongly for anyone before it's scared her, and she was terrified if Caroline was scared they might never get the chance to see how amazing they could be. It was a fine balance of encouraging and not pushing Caroline, she would have to prepare herself for a bumpy ride, even more so than she was possibly used to in previous relationships. Her eyes glued to Caroline's picture once more she felt her heart rate rise, her breath heavier her stomach churn she didn't have a choice. She was already head over heels in love with the Magnificent Caroline Elliot, she grabbed her phone and began to text.
"Hi Caroline I'm sorry I know it's early but I just wanted to check you were ok, and to apologize if you felt I over stepped the mark. I don't want to loose our friendship, please forgive me. Kate x".
Caroline rolled over she had hardly had the best nights sleep she had ever had, now as she began to sit up she cradled her head feeling the shooting pain and simultaneous throbbing pain hit harder, now upright. "Shit!" Caroline slumped into the bedcovers again leaning over to the side draw to pull out the pain killers, always prepared was Caroline. She laughed at the irony she hadn't been prepared for last night, although she knew it's was coming, She gulped them down with the glass water shed placed on the side. Slowly she looked down at her attire realizing she hadn't even managed to undress herself Last night, as she looked over at the empty wine bottles.
Caroline groaned loudly and rose from the covers and headed to her en suite, she turned on the shower looking at herself in the mirror god she looked a mess. Thank Christ she had an en suite and could avoid everybody else looking like this, she couldn't face questions like are you ok? Where did you go last night?
Her head throbbed relentlessly as her mind clouded once again to the image of Kate last night, her hand descending into unknown territory the euphoria at the feeling. She closed her eyes gripping the sink as images of Kate's fluttering eyes and whispered groans ringed in her head. She had tried to dispel them last night but had failed and this morning they once again plagued her mind, controlling her as they flashed a monologue of sexy eyes and seductive smiles as she had touched Kate. She flung her head up opening her eyes the image so raw so real she almost couldn't face it, couldn't withstand it's power.
Caroline stumbled into the shower feeling the hot water cascade over her naked flesh, the washing away of impurity of innocence. She had crossed that line with Kate her body meeting hers and there was no return all denial washed away. Her ability to walk away gone her need and desire given an opportunity to clench its thirst, her walls let down herself been left open. She placed her hands against the shower screen as the water almost scaled her flesh as she tried to regain some composure some understanding, the tears slipping freely from her eyes under cover of water. She felt so exposed so terrified the only defense she had ever had was to ignore these thoughts to deny who she was and she had done it so well shed almost succeeded. Now Kate had undone all this she felt anger at Kate, at herself for undoing her she now had to face these feelings, physical and emotional and now she'd let them in she wasn't sure she'd have the strength to shut them out again.
She had spent her youth being isolated she had never trusted anyone with how she felt other than a few sly comments testing the water as other friends came out, and then became to frightened bolting down the hatches. It had killed her to deny it she would go out at night clubs desperate for men to talk to her, because she had no interest in initiating or chasing she just wanted an easy target. She had often slept with men she had met that night just to build up the reputation around her , that she was definately a flirt and loved men even though she never had boyfriends or relationships. She had buried herself in her work, it had only been when the urge to marry and have children as she got older forced her to marry John. He had been nice, easily managed but never pressed her buttons in any way, she had over the years steered clear of any woman she had though was pretty to avoid any old feelings possibly resurfacing.
So as she stood naked the hot water running over her pale skin, she cried... Sobbed even for all the years of isolation, all the years of missed opportunities, for not knowing love, not knowing sex, not having someone who made her complete who made her feel alive. She had slowly let life suffocate her from the inside out shutting down anything that might give her chance to be herself scared of the repcussions. So she cried for the past for herself, but also for the present for herself now the decisions now to be faced, for the boys. This feeling finally released and so powerful she feared it would swallow her hole, the feeling so intense so raw like nothing she could have imagined... Kate had set her free. But now was the hardest choice to run from it shut it down before more damage and live with the consequences of having a glimpse at her other life. Or to finally stand tall and admit, confront herself give Kate the chance to get close, let herself feel her skin on hers, her body free aroused, to finally be loved And to love...
