AN: My apologies for the rediculously long delay in publishing Episode 2. But life got in the way. And while it is still getting in the way, I would very much like to put the rest of my story out there to counteract some of the negative Chris/Lorelai karma that's floating around right now. And while this story might not make you feel better immediately about that whole mess, I hope that you enjoy it anyway.
And now, the beginning of Episode 2 of my own personal season 7. Read, review and enjoy...
It is dark in Lorelai's bedroom and we can only see her by some moonlight shining in through the window. She is in her pajamas, under the blankets, in bed…alone. She is on the phone and from the slight smile on her lips, she appears to be enjoying her conversation. "But they were just poking at it, and the kid would kick or itch just depending on where they touched," she explains in a rather disgusted, high-pitched voice. "And the kid was talking the whole time. He would say "That's a light bulb" or "my nose itches" just like everything was normal."
"Uh huh."
"But his head was off!" Lorelai talks animatedly, her free hand explaining her obvious disgust with wild gestures. "The whole top of his head had been detached from the rest of him and they were poking at his brain!"
"Well, I'm not a doctor," Christopher responds reasonably, "But I believe that in order to perform brain surgery, you must have access to the brain. Which, in most people, and again, I have no medical degree to back this up, is located in their head."
"I know that," Lorelai says, somewhat impatiently, "That's not the point. He was talking coherently, awake, and could feel his nose itch, but he couldn't tell that his head was off!"
"I'm sure he was on some crazy drugs, Lor."
"Ok, but what if my head is off, and I just don't know it?"
"Because of all the drugs that you did in your crazy youth?" Chris asks with a laugh.
"Well, I can feel when my nose itches. And I can talk coherently-"
"That is the subject of serious debate in psychological circles," Chris interjects.
"And I can identify a light bulb!" Lorelai continues, pointedly ignoring him. "So what if my head is off, and I just don't know it?"
Chris rolls his eyes slightly and answers with the only logical response he can come up with. "Alright, no more House for you."
"But what else am I supposed to watch on Tuesday nights?" Lorelai asks sullenly.
"You could always try just going out and doing something instead of watching medical dramas." Lorelai scoffs at his suggestion. "Lorelai Gilmore, certainly you of all people could find something interesting to do," Chris mock-chastises her.
"But not nearly as interesting as-"
"Infinitely more interesting than diagnostic medicine." Chris responds firmly before she can even finish her sentence. Lorelai doesn't respond and she is looking somewhat distraught. After a moment of silence Chris asks, "Lorelai? Lor, you there?"
"Yes," she answers, her voice wavering.
"Lorelai," Chris says authoritatively. "You're head is not off."
"Are you sure?" Lorelai whines as she reaches up to check.
"Yeah, but you better sleep with your head under the pillow to make sure it stays that way," Chris teases. Lorelai clutches her skull firmly, smashing her hair down into her face. After a long pause while Christopher laughs he asks, "What were they poking with?"
"What?" Lorelai asks, confused at the seemingly sudden change in conversation topic.
"What were they poking him with? Sticks? Scalpels?"
"I don't really know," Lorelai starts and clutches her head harder.
"Their bare fingers?" Chris asks with a smirk.
"Ewwwww! Chris!!" She squints her eyes.
"No, you're right. I'm sure they wear gloves." Chris is smiling with an evil glow in his eyes.
"That's it, I'm going now." Lorelai declares.
"It is late," Chris says, glancing at the clock beside his bed. "We should get some sleep. I can do some research and finish this discussion tomorrow night."
"Research? Gonna take a crash course in nuerosurgery? Or just look it up on Wikipedia?" Lorelai teases.
"Good night, Lor. And say hi to Rory for me," Chris says.
"G'night, Chris." Lorelai hangs up the phone, and then slowly puts it down on her bedside table. She carefully pulls the blankets up around her, mashes her pillows to make them more comfortable, and lies down. After a brief second, she pulls a pillow out from under her, lies with her head flat on the mattress instead and holds the pillow protectively over her head and hisses, "Damn House."
(Roll Intro)
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