A.N.- sorry that it takes me so long to up date. Should I start writing 'previously' and giving a summary of the last chapter on each new chapter? I'm not sure if folks remember what happened last time or not. A lot of stories I like take a while to get up-dated and sometimes I totally forget what happened in previous chapters, so let me know if you want that. If it's any consolation, there's been good reasons for my up-dating so slowly. I work full time and recently we all got assessed and stuff, it was pretty stressful. Then there was a family situation I can't discuss because it's pretty private, and then recently I was really down because everyone forgot my birthday. Like seriously, even people on facebook said nothing (facebook tells you when it's someone's birthday, what the hell?) I got one birthday comment from someone off deviantart, and that was it, so, yeah, pretty upset. I'm ok now though, just get on with it don't you?
This chapter is nothing like the stuff in The Model Wife (at a stretch I could say that it's about realising you are a bad person, or that you've let yourself down in some way, which happens to the main character in that book, but, as I say that would be a stretch.)
This chapter is just a plot point I wanted in my fanfic because I think it's interesting,and it helps set up later issues.
Lawliet stood amongst the ruins of the kitchen. His chef's hat was slumped mournfully on his head, his apron covered in flour and sauces. Even his outfit was depressed.
Slowly, he bought his thumb up and popped it into his mouth wishing to god that there was a magic pill to make this feeling go away. 'Light Yagami tricked me.' He could imagine Light out there now, chortling to himself was sipping a rich brandy and smiling at his cloyingly smug girlfriend whose name Lawliet couldn't recall.
'I shouldn't have been fooled,' he picked up the chair he had thrown in a fit of rage before walking to the sink and filling it with hot water. 'I should have known it would all go wrong. I should have known not to trust him at all.' He imagined his sister's face when she returned home. His heart sank and he in like fashion slumped to the floor, his fight all gone. He had failed. All he had to do was make a stupid meal to give his sister a break and maybe make things up to Ray for his past misdemeanours, and he had failed.
The jingle to a Katy Perry pop song began to screech out joyfully. His mobile was ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket after the song died after whoever had been calling had hung up.
It had been Naomi.
There was a whoo-ho-ho-hoo-ho! as his ever happy phone now whistled that she had sent him a text message.
Lawliet gulped. He didn't even want to know what she had sent to him. It was probably something loving and kind, maybe her saying how much she was looking forward to her meal...maybe her saying that she loved him and that she loved Ray and was now glad she wouldn't have to choose between them thanks to this lovely meal he was preparing.
Biting his bottom lip so hard that it bled, he opened the mobile and read the message.
Hey Lawlipop, I'm sorry but Ray cancelled tonight : ' C So, I thought I'd take your advice and have some fun. : ) Me and Hal are going out for the night! So fun right? I feel like a kid! Anyway, I'm so, so sorry please save me some dinner, or invite your reading buddies over and eat it yourselves. Love you more than the moon! Xxx
Lawliet let out a sigh and leaned his head back onto the cupboard. He never had felt so relived! He almost wanted to cry from relief and joy, but hot water from the tap he had left on poured on to his face, spurring him back into action.
It was time to clean up and put this horrible night behind him. But he would remember that Light Yagami needed to pay!
Meanwhile, Mello was skulking about on the cold, dark Manchurian streets with his red-headed friend.
"For fucks sake Matt, put that thing away I'm trying to talk to you."
Matt blew a bubble with his gum and continued to press the noisy buttons on his game consol. "Fuck you," he responded calmly, "I can still hear your bitching with the game going."
Mello rolled his eyes and pouted in vexation. He wanted to tell Matt that he was a piece of shit friend and storm away, but that would be a lie; Matt was a good- and Mello's only- friend and they both knew this.
"Have you got any money?" Mello asked, "we could go the chippy?"
Matt nodded and they slunk towards the brightly lit chip shop. Teenagers buzzed around the shop like flies around a light.
"Hey look!" cried a familiar voice from school, "it's the bum-buddies!"
Everyone cackled like hyenas. Matt put up his middle finger as their only response (not even looking up from his game), before they stepped inside. The shop was owned by a large sweaty man who always wore a vest with a filthy apron. His shoulders were covered in black wiry hairs and it was always a bit of a Russian roulette whether one would end up in your food or not. However, it was the closest shop in their area that was still open at 10:30 at night.
No-one knew the guy's name, he was just called 'Hairy Chippy Bloke', but the 'Hairy Chippy Bloke' never bothered learning any of his customers names either.
"Ginger and tranny, what you want?" he growled through his bushy moustache.
"Better grammar from you," snarled Mello but Matt elbowed him in the ribs and said over him;
"A large bag of chips and two fishcakes, ta."
Hairy Chippy Bloke began to dish up their food declaring, "this is why you I like, Ginger, you are ugly, but have much manners. You," he pointed at Mello, "are an aberration against god," he kissed a greasy sweaty crucifix that was on a necklace he was wearing.
Matt took the food and smiled tightly whilst Mello scowled at his necklace, "I don't think your god would like you wearing an image of him dying. If he had been shot by a gun would you all wear a bullet-ridden corpse around your neck?"
Hairy Chipped Man whirled around to glower furiously at Mello, throwing the bag of chips in their faces and screaming, "get out! Insolent pups! Get out of my shop!"
Matt sighed and dragged Mello away by the hand muttering, "you always take things too far."
"I take things too far?"
"Yes," they stopped outside (ignoring the gaggle of teenagers' comments about them holding hands,) "it his religion man. I know he's ignorant but you can't say shit like that to people."
Mello pulled his arm away, "I'm entitled to say what I want. I had to deal with his nonsense. Everyone wants Freedom of Speech, but only when what's being said is something they agree with." He sighed angrily, feeling boiling fury stirring in his stomach, "it's like when people complain about any nicety being expected of them being 'liberal nonsense', it's always liberal nonsense until you expect people to treat you in a nice way. It's all bullshit, I can't stand it."
The pair sat down on a bench and opened up the bags. They ate silently for a moment before Matt tentatively asked, "you said once, a few years back, that you believed in god. You were mad at me because I said it was stupid. Has that changed?"
Mello remembered that day. They boys had been thirteen years old. Mello had just been to church for the first time in his life. It was back when his mam was still around. It had been the last nice thing she'd ever done for them. She had taken him, Misa and Wedy to a large cathedral in town. Misa liked the style, but little else, and Wedy had been bored and complained the whole time, but Mello had been amazed. The pictures of Jesus on the walls, the massive stained glass windows of the apostles, the white statues of the saints inside contrasted to the gargoyles and demons outside had all impressed upon him the importance and weight of religion as a whole and all the questions it bought with it on morality, and what it was to be human, and the universe itself.
He had decided to be a catholic that day. He wore the rosary around his arm and the crucifix around his neck for years, but then...
"I don't want to talk about it," he said quietly.
Matt watched him for a while. He couldn't remember when Mello stopped wearing all the religious paraphernalia. Matt had never paid too much attention, being an atheist and holding some anti-theist views, but as they sat in the dark eating chips, he berated himself for not paying attention to another important change Mello had probably been dealing with. Was it something to do with the gay thing maybe?
Matt pulled out his game and began to play again, his fingers moving quickly but his mind focusing on Mello. He didn't know what to say. Mello was volatile and difficult. Sometimes, Matt had learned, it was better to just be quiet and allow Mello to be alone with his thoughts.
It was around two in the morning when Mello snuck into his home. He wandered into his bedroom only to see Wendy sitting on the bed. He stood very still, startled into temporary submission.
Her eyes were red with tiredness.
"I have to be in work in less than four hours," she said quietly, "what on earth were you playing at, leaving for this long?"
Mello crossed his arms defensively and refused to look her way, "maybe if I had a mobile you could have called me..."
"And how could we afford to give you one?" she bit out immediately. "How? Me on me cleaners wage and you dicking around at school? How could we afford it?"
"I don't dick around! What, do you want me to leave school and get stuck in some dead-end job like you?"
"No!" she all but screamed, leaping to her feet, "no! I want you to recognise the fact that I am in a dead-end job, that I have sacrificed any chance of leaving this pit of poverty and unhappiness so that you and Misa have a fucking chance in this world! I recognise your intelligence and I do what I can to appreciate it, so the least you could recognise what I do for you instead of spitting in my face and sneering at what little I am able to give you! All I ask is that you give people such as me or your sister just a modicum of the respect you give your friend, just a little."
There was a pregnant pause.
"But evidently that is too much!"
She stormed past him, knocking his shoulder on the way out.
Mello stood for a while, biting his tongue and shaking slightly. He regretted what he had said. He regretted nearly everything that came out of his stupid mouth at any given time. He always found a way to hurt people. It was like his special talent; hurting people he loved the most. Matt needed to stop being friends with him, Mello would probably get him killed one day.
He sat down on his bed and rubbed his eyes. He wasn't crying, just tired. He then looked up at the ceiling and thought about god. If there was a god, he probably didn't love Mello anymore. No one did. Which was just as well, as he didn't deserve their love anyway.
