A/N: Yay! Finally the seventh chapter! Sevens' a lucky number, so I'm hoping this chapter will be good! And I know you were all anticipating Nozomi to start "screaming and spazzing." I apologize, but that would make L even more suspicious of her, so she will not be doing either…in front of L, that is. (Evil smirk)

Some of you might have noticed that the chapter name is "Screaming, Tennis and Concussions". I'm just here to inform you that, yes. All of those will occur in this chapter.

Nozomi Yagami's Wonderous Life of Doom

Chapter 7

Screaming, Tennis, and Concussions

Okay. This isn't so bad. I just asked L out on a date is all…GAH! I'M TOTALLY SCREWED!!!

"Really? If you're telling the truth, then you have nothing but my respect and admiration," I said, smiling. But on the inside, I was screaming.

"Thank you," he said.

I tried not to look completely nervous. I had on a bright smile, trying to look like a was doing nothing less than vomiting sunshine, but all I wanted to do was go jump off a building.

"I did NOT see that coming!" Ryuk gasped, beginning to laugh. "What do you intend to do about this, Nozomi?"

"Please excuse me for a moment," I mumbled, heading towards the bathroom. Once in there, I took a deep breath and screamed as loudly as I could. I used to think soundproof bathrooms were stupid, but I'm glad they really do exist. If they didn't, the entire stadium of people would be able to hear me screaming "WRAAUGH! THAT MOTHER [CENCOR] BASTARD! I'LL [CENCOR] HIM UP SO BADLY, HIS [CENCOR] WILL BE STUCK IN HIS [CENCOR] LITTLE [CENCOR]!!!! OH, THIS IS JUST [CENCOR] GREAT! [CENCOOOOOOOOOOOR]!!!!!!"

"Ooh, language, Nozomi," Ryuk cackled as I left the bathroom quietly.

"Now where were we?" I asked, sitting down next to L again, a bright smile painted on my face. "Oh, yes, you're L?"

"Yes. The reason I chose to reveal my identity to you was because I think you will be of some help on the Kira investigation," he said.

If Hideki Ryuga is L---no, even if he isn't L…I…I can't DO anything to him! If what he's saying is true, that must mean he's already shown his face to my father. If he died right after revealing his identity to me, it would only confirm their suspicions. And it's obvious that Hideki Ryuga is only a stupid alias. Even if I get lucky and it isn't an alias, if I write his name in the Death Note, I might accidentally think of Hideki Ryuga the pop idol. If Hideki Ryuga the pop idol dies, then that would also confirm their suspicions. Does he already suspect me of being Kira? Why else would he tell a detective's daughter that he's L? Does he still suspect the people that Raye Penber was investigation? That must be it…Wait. I'll look too freaked out. I just need to clear my mind…

And suddenly, the melon boobies from the porn I accidentally bought the previous month popped into my head.

"God dammit!" I hissed under my breath.

Hideki turned to me. "Is something wrong?"

"Um, no!" I said nervously. "I'm just, um, PMSing!"

Wait, why the hell did I say that?!

He didn't seem to be fazed by the random information on my womanness and turned back to the stage. I sighed. This would be a long ceremony.

DNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDN

"God, I didn't think that would be so interesting," Ryuk said to me as we exited the school.

"Hey, Nozomi!"

Aww, frick.

Ryuk chuckled. "Hey, Nozomi, there's your new boyfriend."

"Shut the [CENCOR] up, Ryuk!" I hissed quietly. I suddenly smiled and turned to the strange man I had had a crush on no less than an hour ago. "Hi, Hideki!"

"Nice meeting you," he said.

"You too."

He went over to a car. But not just a car---a flipping limo.

"Nice…car…" I managed to say, slightly twitching in anger. So he was my mortal enemy, was hot, and had an awesome car!? Where the hell was the justice!?

"I'll see you around campus," Hideki said from the back seat of the limo.

"Uh, yeah. Take care," I said with a wave as the car sped down the street.

"Oh, I hate him. That sexy son of a bitch could rot in the fire pits of hell for all I care," I whispered bitterly.

"If you hate him so much, then why did you just call him sexy?" Ryuk cackled.

I blushed. "Shut up! He's so not sexy!"

"Then why were you yelling 'Take me, 162! Take me!' last night in your sleep?" Ryuk asked, howling with laughter.

I ignored the shinigami. I ignored him on the train. And I ignored him when I got home. After trudging up the steps to my room, I locked the door and sat at my desk.

"Hey…Nozomi?" Ryuk said.

"…"

"Nozomi?"

"…"

"Nozo-"

"Dammit! He got me!" I yelled, slamming my fist down on the table. "I've never been so humiliated in my life!"

"Hey, why don't you just do the shinigami eye deal? Then you can kill him, no problem!"

"Yeah, but what if he isn't L!?" I snapped at Ryuk. "Then that'll just show the real L that I am Kira! God, I can't believe I thought I loved that sick son of a bitch no more than two hours ago!"

And I just broke down.

"What? Hey, Nozomi! Aww, crap! I didn't mean to make you cry!" Ryuk said. "God, how do I turn you off!?"

It was true. I thought I did love Hideki Ryuga. I know it sounds stupid, but the moment I saw him at the entrance exams, I just…I couldn't stop thinking about him. I tried my hardest to remember his face because I didn't want it to fade from my mind. I didn't even write very many names in the Death Note because I was fantasizing about him too much. I didn't care about the Death Note at the time, all I cared about was 162!

But now…

I wanted him to rot in the fire pits of hell.

The thought of him dying made me laugh. I was laughing even harder than Ryuk did half the time. "No, this is perfect! Hideki Ryuga wants my friendship? I'll give it to him, then! Then one day, when he trusts me and I'll get the information I want! But for now…" I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were sparkling red with evil. "Let the games begin, Hideki Ryuga. We'll be…bestest friends."

DNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDN

Tennis…that weirdo wants me to play tennis?

"Good luck Nozomi-chan!" Minami called from the sidelines.

"Kick his sexy ass!" Saku-chan yelled. I rolled my eyes. Saku-chans' crush on Hideki Ryuga was getting to be a bit retarded. She didn't know he was my mortal enemy, of course. If she did, she would totally back off.

Keiko merely clapped.

"I'll admit, Hideki, I was a bit surprised when you asked me to play tennis," I said, adjusting my pink sports bra and sports skirt. "I'll bet you didn't know how good I was, though." I winked.

"I won't worry about it," he said, walking out to the court with me. "I was actually the junior British champion when I was younger."

"Oh. Are you from the United Kingdom?" I asked.

"I lived in England for about five years, but that won't really say anything about L's identity."

Crap!

Once we were on opposite sides of the court, Hideki served the ball beautifully. It was fast and steady. Ryuk actually jumped out of the way of the ball, even though he knew it would just go through him.

"Wow! That was flipping sweet, man!" I yelled, forgetting I hated him.

That was a very interesting match that day. He got a point. I got a point. He missed the ball. I missed the ball. I was beginning to wonder what he expected of me. If I won the game, it might be more of a suspicion. But it'll be obvious if I throw the match. But either way, I wasn't going to let

Him

Win!

My tennis racket and the ball collided, sending the yellow sphere over to Hideki. He tried to hit it, but it went past with great speed.

"Four to four," the referee yelled. "Yagami Nozomi to serve!"

I got the ball and smirked. I might have been insane and clumsy everywhere else, but I was flipping amazing on the tennis court.

You think that by this game of tennis, we'll somehow be closer. No way in hell, man. If I want to defeat you…what do I do?

And that's when it hit me.

No, seriously. The tennis ball actually hit me. Square in the forehead, actually. I fell on my back, feeling something wet near my head.

"Oh, crap, Nozomi! You're bleeding!" Ryuk yelled.

I was wincing in pain as I suddenly felt someone feel my pulse before holding me. "Are you alright?"

"H…Hideki…" I mumbled. "Owwwwie…it hurts like hell…"

"Someone get the nurse!" I heard Keiko yell. "She's bleeding!"

"If I die, it's all your fault," I whispered to Hideki bitterly.

"You won't die. I promise. Can you see how many fingers I'm holding up?"

I winced, trying to see clearly. "Um…your hand is shaped like a giraffe…" And everything went black.

DNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDN

"Nozomi-chan?…are you awake?"

I groaned before turning on my side. "Whaaaaat?" I whined.

"Okay. That's good. At least you're alive…"

I suddenly recognized the voice. "Hideki…" I mumbled, turning to look at him. I was in the infirmary bed, an ice pack on my forehead. "You…you bastard! You hit me with the frigging tennis ball! Why the hell would you do that!? And where are my friends?! You didn't kill them with tennis balls too, did you?!"

"Um…in order…it was an accident. Your friends had to go back to class. And no," he said.

I sighed, throwing the ice pack off my head. "Sorry. I just feel like crap." I extended my hand. "Congratulations on winning."

"What? You won, Nozomi."

I raised an eyebrow. "Huh? But the tennis ball gave me a concussion."

"Yes, it did," Hideki said. "But the ball bounced off your forehead to the other side of the court; my side. Seeing as I was trying to make sure I hadn't killed you, I couldn't get the ball. So, yes. You won."

"Sweet!" I got up from the bed and straitened my top. "Come on. Let's take a walk."

"Um, the nurse said you should rest for at least another two hours…"

"Screw it! I feel fine!" I reassured him. But I didn't tell him that Scooby Doo and Napoleon Dynamite were standing behind him. Yeah. I was a little delusional. I suppose that's what happens when you get a concussion from a tennis ball.

Note to self: NEVER play tennis with Hideki again…

So we left the nurses' office and went outside the building. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom and the wind was blowing, so the petals were floating everywhere. It was so beautiful, I almost felt like grabbing Hideki's hand.

Almost.

"Hey, I'm hungry. Wanna go get some food?" I asked him.

"You're always hungry," Ryuk mumbled from behind me.

"Okay," Hideki answered. "I'm sure you want to ask me a few questions. But before that, I should tell you…I suspect you of being Kira."

Correction from earlier in the chapter. Now I was screwed.

"What? You think I'm Kira?" I asked with a chuckle. "But that's retarded! You know I'm far too clumsy and dumb to pull of being Kira."

"Oh, dumb is something you're not, Nozomi," he said, which somehow made me blush. "And once I can be certain you're not Kira, I'd like you to help me with the investigation."

"Um…okay…"

We only had to walk a block before reaching the coffee shop I had in mind. I didn't like it for the coffee. I liked it for the awesome cake that was only 200yen a piece. God, I loved cake. I loved all sweets. Once in the coffee shop, it appeared to me that Ryuga enjoyed sugar as well.

"…And I'll take regular black coffee, extra sugar," I continued after Ryuga had ordered. "And a piece of white cake with a lot of frosting. You want a piece too, Ryuga?"

"Oh, certainly. Thank you."

After the coffee and cake arrived, I also realized that Ryuga was totally OCD. He stacked the little packs of creamer once they were empty. It took all my willpower as not to knock it down.

"God, I loooooove cake," I hissed happily as I continued to devour the delicacy.

"Nozomi, you're starting to look carnivorous," Ryuk said.

"Yes. I enjoy cake as well," Ryuga said, taking a bite. That was the one and only thing I liked about Hideki Ryuga. No matter how unladylike I seemed to be, I was still Nozomi to him. He obviously didn't think less of me when I ate that cake like it was my last meal ever, and he didn't think more of me because I was smart. I was just Nozomi to him. That was never going to change. You know, unless he decided to drop the suspicion of me being Kira.

Once I was done with my piece of cake, I glanced around. "This is why I like this place. It's so pretty and quiet. And we're in a place where no one can hear us, or make a fuss about the way you sit."

"I don't sit like this because I want to, Nozomi, but because I have to," He said, sipping his coffee. "If I don't, my deductive skills will decrease by at least forty percent."

"Hmm…" I suddenly remembered what he had called me when I was in the nurse's office. "Hey, did you call me Nozomi-chan earlier?"

He looked up at me. "Oh, yes. You're father refers to you as Nozomi-chan all the time, I suppose I just got used to it. Would you rather I not call you that?"

"No, it's fine," I said. "But only if I can call you Hideki-kun, okay?"

"Alright, then," he agreed. "So, what did you want to ask me about?"

"Oh, it's nothing," I said. Seriously. I forgot what I was going to ask him. "Let's just talk about whatever you want."

"Well, you're under no obligation to do this, but would you mind taking a test of you reasoning deductive skills?"

"Sure? Why not? It sounds like fun." It most certainly did not sound fun.

Hideki-kun handed me three photographs. He explained what they were, but of course I already knew. I did write them, after all. I made it look as if I was carefully looking them over. "Hmm…it appears that Kira made a message in these, as if to mock you. See, if you arrange the photos this way, it looks like it says 'L, do you know? Gods of death love apples.' But if you put it the way the numbers on the back say, it would be 'L, do you know? Love apples, gods of death.' That wouldn't make much sense, would it?"

"That's incorrect."

"What?"

"You see, Nozomi-chan, there were actually four pictures."

That lying bastard!

He pulled out a picture that said 'have red hands' at the top.

"Well, yeah, but I had only three pictures to work with, so my deduction was perfect!" I said, trying not to snap at him.

"No, it wasn't," he continued. "You never considered that there might be a fourth picture. You knew the message with the three pictures was incomplete, yet you still decided to go with the three. I wonder why that is…"

Frick! He's trying to trick me! If I keep falling for this, I'll be doing nothing less than organizing my own death!

"You got me there," I said with a chuckle. "I didn't think of that."

"Nozomi, if you were me and you were faced with the possibility that someone was Kira, how would you go about establishing their guilt or innocence?"

"…"

"Well, if I were you, I'd probably have a [CENCOR], so it's kind of hard to think like you."

"…"

"Right. Sorry."

"Nozomi, now I am three percent sure you're Kira," he said. "But even if you did end up being Kira, it would still be a benefit to have you on the task force. Do you know why I say that?"

God, what's with the questions?

"I don't know. Maybe you think I'd be a help with the investigation?" I said with a shrug. "Or maybe I'd admit that I'm Kira. If I was, I mean. But, then again, I don't know if you yourself aren't Kira. It hardly seems fair to only have one of us be a suspect. I would probably be convinced that you're L if my father were to confirm it. If you can't do that, then I'm afraid I won't be able to help you."

Hideki-kun was about to answer me, when his cell phone rang. "Excuse me," he said, answering the phone. "Yes?"

Mine suddenly rang as well. "Yo?"

"Nozomi-chan!" Hideki-kun said. "You're father…"

"Had a heart attack…" I finished in a small voice.

My day was just getting suckier and suckier, wasn't it?

DNDNDNDNDNDNDNDN

A/N: Thank you for reading the seventh installment of Nozomi Yagami's Wonderous Life of Doom. Next time, a second Kira has been discovered! How will Nozomi respond to who she calls "Beta Kira"? Find out next time!

PS: thanks for all the kind reviews! :3