Chapter 7
If there is any more touchy feely crap, I'm going to kill her.
I can't speak to him. Not here. Not with mobians around to see me. I'm pretty sure no one noticed me watching, or following him, but I can't risk it.
So I'll eavesdrop instead. He's sitting in the middle section of the bleachers with Sally, and my stomach drops into my feet making it hard to walk. Why are they together again? I sneak around back and hide underneath the bleachers and try to keep my footsteps silent, though it's really hard wearing pumps. And no way am I taking them off with all the trash on the ground. Yuck.
"Are you seriously giving me the silent treatment?" Sally sighs and stares Sonic down. She's wearing a skirt so I can see straight up it, giving me full access to blue granny panties. I cringe and try to keep my eyes on Sonic. I guess it's better than a thong though. I'd rather not see a full moon.
"What?"
"You're not talking because you're upset about her, right?"
Sonic shrugs.
"And you're taking it out on me?" She moves closer to him, and I feel like yanking her hair down.
"Sorry." He moves his backpack so it's rested between them. He's pretty smooth about it, but I can tell he doesn't want to be close to her.
"You know I hate it when you shut me out."
I hear a grinding noise and it takes a minute for me to realize it's my teeth. How long has she been his "go to" girl?
"Sorry," he says again. "I know." Sonic picks at a loose thread in his sweater, and it's quiet for what seems like an eternity. "I thought, after this weekend, things were getting better."
This weekend? Does he mean after I did a fugitive move out his bathroom window?
"Sonic…" She inches closer still, almost sitting on top of Sonic's backpack. I really want to scream at her to take the hint.
"Don't."
"What?" Sally's hands are on his forearm now.
"Don't say it."
"Say what?"
"You know what."
She lets out a huge breath from her nose. "I don't get why you let her do this to you."
"She just gets to me!" Sonic's arms fling up and Sally pulls away. "I don't know why either, but she does. And I don't know how much more of it I can take."
"Then don't take it anymore!" I see Sonic's stunned as Sally shouts back. I have to admit, I've never heard her voice this loud either.
"But…" He can't seem to finish his sentence.
"Come on. She's not worth this and you know it. You have to drop it." Her voice softens. "She's not your friend anymore. You have to let her go." She rubs his back to comfort him.
"Don't you think I've tried? It's harder than it looks." He shrugs her hand off, and I can't help but feel happy he keeps rejecting her touch. If he hadn't, I probably would've gone all Erazor Djinn on her even though I have no claim on the boy.
Sally's face darkens, flushing to the color of a tomato. "I guess if you're into shallow girls who sleep with every guy they see, I suppose she would be hard to get over. But I thought you were different than that. Better."
Holy Chaos. Maybe I'm not entirely popular with everyone. I've changed almost one-hundred percent and people are still talking about me behind my back.
My cheeks blow up, and I try not to let tears fall.
Breathe, Amy. Breathe! You have to breathe!
I can't, though. It hurts too much. It's like it's those years ago again, and I'm right back to where I was. Being insulted and gossiped about. It doesn't matter that Sally's one of the loser girls. It feels close to the same as it did before. Only this time, she's making fun of someone I'm trying to be, and not who I really am.
I guess that's not as bad.
I'm breathing again.
I'm also trying not to notice Sally said "get over." I had no idea he had to get over anyone, let alone someone who hasn't given him the time of day since middle school. Someone like me.
"Don't believe everything you hear. I know she's not really like that."
There goes my heart again, pumping so loud I wish I could turn it on silent.
"You keep saying that, but I think you're in denial."
"She's not like that." His voice isn't mean, but it gives the impression he's done talking about it.
How the heck does he know I'm not really like that? Just from this weekend? Or do I always go back to Freak Amy around him?
"Well, you need to face facts," Sally says, standing. She stumbles a little and Sonic reaches out to steady her. When she gets her bearings, she folds her arms. "She's changed. She's a slut who doesn't think about anyone but herself. She doesn't want anything to do with you because you like things that aren't 'socially acceptable'." With every syllable of her air quoted words, she tilts her head to the side. I'm about ready to reach up and yank her skirt down, just to watch her face get redder. See how she feels when someone makes of her. But that would make me a major hypocrite. "It's stupid and shallow and weak. And you deserve better than that." She pauses to catch her breath. Sonic looks at the football field, seemingly lost in thought. "I hate to be the one who has to keep knocking sense into you, but someone has to."
He nods.
Crap. He's not defending me this time. Why would he? Sally's right.
She's right.
Oh my gosh.
I am a huge-ass hypocrite.
Stabbing pains shoot all over my body. I'm about to fall over, but the ground is so nasty.
Sally stomps down the bleachers, leaving Sonic alone. Should I say something to him? How do I do that without him knowing I was here this whole time?
The warning bell rings, and I know I have to go. I can't be late for my last class, but my feet aren't moving. Sonic punches his backpack before picking it up, and stomps off after Sally.
x.X.x
Mina gives me a ride home. I'm so glad I found her before I found Shade. I don't want to act anymore, and though I still have to hide everything in the Secret Rings closet in my mind, I can at least somewhat be myself with Mina.
I stuff my Chemistry book between my legs as I buckle in. I haven't spoken a word to anyone since lunch, and Mina eyes me with a tentative smirk.
"I heard about Shadow." Mina is anything but indistinct.
I nod.
"Does he taste as good as he looks?"
I nod again. I'm not interested in gossip, and I'm way beyond putting up my false persona. I want to get home and erase the conversation I overheard.
"Could you feel it?"
Oh my gosh, is she serious? I give her a look and she's stifling a huge grin. "Are the rumors about him true?" She's laughing now, and I finally break down in a fit too.
"I really have no idea how big his wang is since I wasn't paying attention."
"Ah! I knew it!" she says slamming her hand on the steering wheel.
"Knew what?" I still can't stop laughing.
"I could get you to crack a smile." She winks. "Now tell me what's wrong."
I'm a freaking horrible person who made out with some random guy before stumbling after a guy who I'm face-over-feet for and I don't know why. And I just… I miss being me.
I end up shrugging and looking out the window. Would Mina understand? Or would she be the next person to spit out a bunch of stuff behind my back?
"Did you get the curse? You're really quiet, girl."
"Sorry." And then using her question as an excuse I say, "And yes, I'm on my period. So I'm just a little out of it today."
"I guess I'd be upset too if I was PMS-ing on top of breaking up with my boyfriend, my sister crashing my super cute sports car, and then getting grounded for… how long was it?"
Oh that's right. I'm "grounded."
"Who knows? My dad didn't get to that part."
"I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"
No.
Well, maybe.
"Give me a hug?"
She smiles as she pulls over bumping against the curb. "Whoops," she says, her face flushing. Even if she did drive stick, I don't think I'd ask her to teach me.
We hop out and she pulls me in her arms. I guess faking to be someone else has worked. I know I wouldn't have her if I still hung out with Sonic and all the other S.S.B. players.
We pull back, and I smile.
"Thanks for the ride, dirty skank."
She laughs and socks my arm. "No problem, slut. See ya tomorrow."
She drives off, leaving me standing in my front yard, heels sinking into the grass. I drift my eyes to my new car and puff up my face.
If I was a nice person, I'd leave Sonic alone. Ignore what I overheard today and move on. Do what I've been doing. Be friends with Mina, keep getting the attention I want, and minimize getting tormented by all the kids in school.
But I'm not a nice person. I'm an egotistical, stuck-up, selfish beast. That's who I've become. And all I can think about is what Sally said. "You have to drop it. You have to let her go."
I don't want Sonic to let me go. Not when I just found out he had to. The problem is, I don't know why I feel like this. It's not like I can be his friend without suffering the consequences.
I let out the air stuck in my face and walk down the sidewalk. I'm going to talk to Sonic. And this time, I won't crawl out his window to get away from him.
x.X.x
To make things clear, I don't hate Sally. (She's just a cartoon character, come on people!)
And I actually don't think she's bitch. Put yourself in her position. She's just really honest about her feelings and likes the guy. Wouldn't you do the same?
Ugh stupid storm N stupid school makng us go when theres warnings everywhere N I live a few miles anyway. Darn. -_- wish me luck!
