Can You See Me Through Your Lens


Chapter 7.

Stiles had arrived a good twenty minutes early, he had received a text message from Derek the night before asking if Stiles could come by the next day. The text not saying anything else. It was short and direct. Typical Derek.

Not really having anything to do that day, Stiles had awoken early, made breakfast for himself and his dad leaving a plate for when the man woke up, showered and finally left for the loft once dressed.

He hadn't expected Derek to welcome him at the door, dressed in light sweatpants and a light purple Henley. Once again, Stiles thought to himself that Derek had really changed since the first time they'd met. Stiles asked himself if them working together, getting closer each time they spent hours with the other, caused a bit of that change? If in his presence Derek felt relaxed enough to let go and be himself. Be himself as in wearing sweatpants and a colored Henley.

All Stiles knew, was that, after his massive breakdown - he didn't know how he hadn't had a panic attack that night? Maybe because of how safe he'd felt, wrapped up in Derek's warm embrace? - it felt like whatever was holding him back, whatever had kept him from telling Derek his most intimate fears and secrets, was nearly gone now. Yes, he still felt shy and embarrassed. Yes, he still had apprehensions, but those were nothing to what they had been in the beginning, back when Derek had confronted him at the Hale house.

When he looked up next, twenty minutes had passed and Stiles still didn't know why he was there. Derek had let him into the loft before disappearing into the bathroom downstairs. Stiles had quickly climbed the spiral staircase, heading for the studio, wanting to look at Laura's photo book again.

As he looked through it again, Stiles noticed a figure was present in a lot of the ones Derek had taken while he and his sister lived in New York. Stiles noticed because that one figure was also in numerous pictures he'd seen when searching for Darheel Kee. The man with piercing blue eyes, tattoos, and light brown hair was familiar to the point Stiles wondered if he'd been more than a model and friend to Derek. The idea bugged Stiles greatly, the lick of jealousy burning through his body.

Stiles lifted his head when he heard Derek climb the last stairs to the studio.

"Lost in Laura's pictures again?" The man asked, coming near Stiles.

"Yeah. Again."

"Are you pining for my dead sister?" Derek asked, sounding really serious. The question had Stiles looking at him alarmed, exclaiming quickly,

"What? Of course not! That's... That's just wrong, dude. I'm not pining for her at all."

Derek stayed silent a long minute, his face blank of any expression. Then a big smile cracked his face, his eyes shining brightly.

"I would have smelt it on you, if you were!"

"Freaking Sourwolf!"

"Shut up, you like it and you know it."

"What did Cora do to you during those six months away? You've become such a bitch..." Stiles said, rolling his eyes dramatically.

Derek, acting offended, slapped a hand against his chest, and exclaimed,

"Me? A bitch?"

"Yes, you! You heard me, old guy!"

"Ow, now you're just hurting my feelings, Genim."

"Don't call me that, I hate that name!" Stiles said, blushing slightly, his index fingers pointing in the brunette's direction. The gesture wanted to be intimidating, though Stiles knew his intimidation tactics had never worked on Derek.

Smiling, he said in a low voice,

"Oh really! Then why do you shiver every time I say it?!"

Derek sat down on the ground before him. He grabbed the photo book, his fingers brushing deliberately against Stiles' as he took it from his hands, his eyes falling on the picture of Laura wrapped up in the arms of the same blue eyed man.

Stiles couldn't stop his reaction to that touch. He felt it so deeply, so intimately, burning against his flesh. His breath caught in his throat, and it left him feeling dry and suddenly very thirsty. His hands shook but he tried to hide them from Derek's gaze. And when he met the mans eyes, he was left speechless for a while, hypnotized by how wet Derek's lips looked now that he'd licked them.

"So who's the dude in the picture with Laura? He's in a lot of pictures in the other books, too."

"Why, does it bother you?"

"What? NO! Nope, not at all, I'm just asking cause he's in a lot of pictures. Though, to be honest, it does seem like you had a thing going on."

"And what if I did...?" Derek asked, his eyes boring into Stiles'.

Stiles felt small under that stare, naked. The thought of Derek and that guy... It troubled him. Bothered him to think of them, together. It was something he didn't want to know and had to, at the same time; something he didn't want to think about but that would cloud his mind day and night now. That's why he heard himself say, unable to stop his mouth from spitting the words out,

"Do you have a habit of sleeping with your models?"

"What if I do? What would you do, Stiles?" Derek asked in a low, charming voice that came from deep in his throat.

"I... I don't know... Did you? Did you... sleep with him? At least tell me that, please..."

Derek looked at him closely, keeping silent and Stiles worried he wouldn't answer. Then he felt the brush of the mans left pinky finger on his own, sending shivers though his body and making him feel warm, wanted!

"No, I don't have a habit of sleeping with my models. But yes, I was with him. He was my... I don't really know what to call him. Not a rebound, he was so much more than that, but at the same time I always knew it wouldn't last very long." Derek told him.

His gaze was lost somewhere Stiles knew he couldn't reach him. And that thought pained him. So he wrapped his pinky around Derek's, holding tight, secretly wanting the man to come back from his memories and be here with him, only him. Crazy, how Stiles already felt jealous and protective of the small thing that was his!

"What's his name?" Stiles couldn't stop himself from asking.

"Liam."

"How long did it last?"

"A little over a year. It was two years after I started getting known for my photographs, so about three after... Well, you know."

Stiles shook his head a little, understanding Derek's unsaid words.

"Was it worth it, even if it didn't last?!"

"It was, yeah. Every day spent with him was worth it."

"Then... Why? How?..."

Derek looked at him, understanding shining in his eyes, and said,

"One day, we woke up and it was over. Just like that. Just like a lot of relationships end, because the road you were traveling on has separated and became two and you're not following the same path of life anymore."

"Do you still have contact with him?"

"No. Not anymore." Derek's eyes grew sad.

"Why not?"

"He never told me when we were together; he had a very rare illness attacking his body from the inside, consuming him slowly. Laura and I, we never even smelt that he was sick. And then one day we were having a spaghetti night over at the apartment and the next morning we got a call from his brother saying that he was gone. Just like that, he went to sleep and just never woke up."

"Derek, I'm sorry!" Stiles whispered, hurt by the story. He felt guilty for having been so jealous of the poor guy who clearly had enjoyed life to the fullest and had a smile so bright it seemed to light every picture he was in.

"It's okay. Of all the losses in my life, Liam is the only one I could accept and grieve for. Because it's life, you know, sometimes it's like it's just meant to be that way."

Stiles said nothing, what could he say really, every word in the world would be pointless to that. So he kept silent. He felt like a gesture only could console Derek, show him he was there and grateful Derek had opened up to him, shared something so intimate with him. Slowly, his touch made of tenderness, he cupped the left side of the mans jaw, his thumb caressing the barely there stubble under it. Derek had been shaving more since coming back, and most of the time looked like he had when they'd met in the preserve two years ago. Soft and hard at the same time.

Derek let himself go for a second, leaning into the touch, eyes closed. Oh, how he'd dreamt to feel Stiles' hands touch him like this. But, he still couldn't give in. Not now. He had to wait, Stiles was still too fragile. What they had was still too fragile. And things were still too... Raw, to let go of right now.

So he looked into the boy amazing eyes one last time, then got up to go to his computer.

"Last night I was looking at the 'Masquerade Elements' set we did and there's still one picture we need to take for it to be complete!"

"Fire."

"Yeah, fire."

"Okay." Stiles whispered. He'd known when Derek had suggested an elements theme, that they'd have to talk about using fire, but he wasn't sure how to bring the subject up. He took a breath then said,

"If, and I'm only saying if, we were to take pictures for that element, it would involve some real fire at some point, right? Just like the other elements? Would you be okay to work like that? Would you be able to, you know, watch me play with fire?!"

His eyes locked on Derek', searching for answers he wasn't sure he'd find in those pale greenish orbs. Derek kept silent, the moment dragging on for what seemed like forever, until the man turned away, going to put Laura's photo book back on the shelf in its usual place with all the others. His fingers lingered on it's leather cover, a shuddering breath escaping the mans mouth before he said softly,

"I guess we just found the real work we have to do for me!"

Stiles felt goosebumps creeping over his skin, slowly, like he was trying to tame a wild animal. Walking towards Derek, he stopped a few inches from him. Lifting his hand he put it gently on the mans shoulder, a flashback of that same gesture months ago clouding his vision for a fleeting second. He felt the warm skin under his touch, the muscle tightening before going loose, and he could also feel the rise and fall of Derek's breath.

"I miss her, you know. I miss them all. Everyone I lost!"

"Derek..." he whispered, stepping closer.

"When you came by that night, you looked so frightened, so broken and I couldn't help it. I was scared for you. It felt like if I didn't take things into my own hands, if I didn't take care of you, then you would disappear too. I'd wake up one day and you'd be gone... Just like everyone else. That's why I couldn't say no when you came to ask for my help."

Stiles let out a shaky breath, he'd never imagined those were the reasons Derek had agreed to do this. He hadn't thought he meant that much to the man.

Shaking, a tight ball growing in his gut, he let his hand wander down Derek's arm, caressing the bare skin of his forearm. He felt the goosebumps under his fingers, felt the hair on that arm raise just because of his touch. He took a step and found himself pressed against the muscular back of the man. His left hand, moving on its own it seemed, lifted to rest on Derek's left hip. He moved closer, so that he could press his nose in between Derek's scapula and take a deep breath of the unique sent that was Derek Hale. The tips of his fingers brushed against the top of Derek's hand, and finally his fingers linked with the mans. His left hand tightened its hold on Derek's hip bone.

The moment felt like it was stuck in time, like the world had stopped turning on its axe and the only thing that mattered now, was them, together at that very moment.

"You're precious, you know!" Derek said softly, his voice sounding tighter than usual, like his emotions were all trapped in his throat, in his words.

"You are too, Derek. You're very precious to me!" Stiles said back, his voice muffled by Derek's shirt.

Derek turned around, his eyes met Stiles', then lingered further down on the teens face, absorbing every detail before coming to rest on his rosy lips.

Excitement filled Stiles, his heart beating quickly, furiously in his chest. He felt like, this moment, was the turning point of their relationship, and Stiles would go crazy if something didn't happen in the next five second.

Derek let his senses be overwhelmed by Stiles scent, the feeling of his skin touching his, the sound of his raging heartbeat and shuddery breathing. The next thing his senses registered, his hands were cupping Stiles' face, the thinner body pressed tightly against his own and their lips meeting halfway…

Stiles had never felt like this, so awake, so fragile yet strong at the same time, like he owned the world. It was like being sad and extremely happy both at the same time, and everything else disappeared leaving only him and Derek... Kissing!


And that's it for chapter seven wolvies.

I'm sorry i'm a day behind on my usual Thursday post, but i wasn't really feeling well yesterday plus i'm in the middle of exams, so right now my life kinda sucks.

Anyway, hope you guys liked this chapter.

Let me know in a review.

xoxo

P.