It Sucks Being the Eldest
Number 91: Sleep Over
"Dick, how come Bruce won't let me sleep over at Stephanie's place?"
"I think he assumes you'll do something foolish."
"I wasn't asking you, Damian." The younger boy rolled his eyes and punched Tim's shoulder, Dick on the other hand was nodding his head thoughtfully.
"Well, you are that age."
"What age? I don't get it." Jason snorted and poked Tim in the forehead.
"Pubescent. With all those hormones running rampant inside you, Stephanie wouldn't stand a chance." Tim's face when from snow white to crimson in two seconds and Jason's cheek was suddenly more purple than a plum.
Number 92: Not My Idea of Fun
Damian was ten years old and one of the youngest Robin's ever to be at Batman's side, regrettably, the young sidekick wasn't the only one who noticed this.
Catwoman liked to pinch his cheeks…A lot.
Huntress would give him this sexy smirk and say "hey there, baby."
Batgirl would just giggle.
Batwoman planted kisses all over his cheeks.
Poison Ivy was three inches from stealing Damian mouth in a kiss.
His mother just liked to squeeze the life out of him.
Damian would like to make one things clear: He is not a teddy bear that you can hug. He is a vicious killing machine and you all are dead for portraying him as…dare he say it, "cute".
Number 93: Questions That Shouldn't be Asked
Damian wandered into the kitchen and lifted himself onto a seat beside Barbara as he finished breakfast, he tapped her arm gently and the redhead looked at him.
"Need something, sweetie?" she took a sip of her coffee.
"Yeah. Um…what does "yuri" mean?" the coffee came shooting out of her mouth and straight into Bruce's face.
Number 94: Crushing
Nightwing and Red Hood walked into the room with relative ease, meandering through seas of faces to get to the far window, Red hated these gatherings because the other heroes viewed him as a traitor despite the fact that he had done a decent job of taking care of Gotham. Superman and his stupid moral compass however, thought Jason shouldn't be a part of the League but a few words from Batman set him straight.
The second Robin pulled off his helmet and he pushed it under his arm, grabbing a class (hopefully filled with alcohol), and took a large sip. He frowned and ran his tongue over his lips, passing the drink to Nightwing.
"Cranberry juice, what are we, children?"
"Trust me Jay, you don't want to see Flash drunk…or Green Arrow…or Booster Gold…You know what? No one looks great when they're drunk."
"Does it look like I care? I need whiskey or something and a damn cigarette. Oh wait, I'm banned from those."
"I'm not allowing you to get cancer, I refuse to lose you." Red rolled his eyes and watched Batman pull Flash away from Starfire, whispering something in his ear that made Flash squirm uncomfortably.
"You don't need to guilt trip me Dickie, I get-" Jay's eyes left his brother and followed a certain blond heroine as she wrapped an arm around Green Arrow. Dick sighed.
"They're getting married, you know."
"What?"
"Black Canary and Green Arrow. Wanna go say "congratulations"?" Red Hood turned around, took the glass and poured it over Nightwing's head.
"You suck."
Number 95: Screaming
He doesn't remember the Lazarus Pit, only brief images that make him want to disappear. If anything, the one thing, the one concrete thing Jason remembers is his own tortured screams, the panic and absolute terror. It was a constant, ragged scream, as he killed Ra's guards and bolted past Talia - the demon brat's mother.
His screams. Just his. Nothing else. The only memory of his resurrection. Just screams.
Number 96: Saint Jason
Although Jason doesn't appreciate the title, everyone knows it's true. Who else goes about Gotham to get druggies off the street and into hospitals?
Number 97: Oh What a Wonderful Feeling
…When Damian kicks Dick in the, well, dick.
Number 98: Little Terror
"Tim, I don't know what's more amusing. The fact that you were fighting a six year old or the fact that the six year old won." Jason walked past Dick and kneeled beside Tim and rolled up his sleeve.
"Just because he likes you doesn't mean he likes us, dick. That and he bites."
Number 99: Bullies
Dick doesn't have to worry because Jason is too intimidating to bully, Tim is smart enough to not piss anyone off, and Damian's just too cute.
Damian: Call me "cute" one more time, I dare you.
Cute.
Number 100: Damian (and to a lesser extent, Jason)
Dick: I'd like to apologize for anything my little brother does or says, he means well-
Jason: Sometimes.
Dick: Shut up, Jay. Anyway, don't worry. He still has a long way to go-
Jason: And plenty of more people to put in the hospital.
Dick: Jay.
Jason: OK, OK. I'm quiet. Pretend I'm not even here.
Dick: Right. Despite his…violent nature, he'll make an exceptional Robin.
Jason: And maybe the first Robin to actually kill someone.
Dick: ...You know what? Both of you are terrible.
Jason: But you love us.
Dick: Regrettably.
