DISCLAIMER: Yup. I decided to do it today, instead of the brainless idiots that always do so.
Itachi: I am NOT a brainless idiot!
Who said I was talking about you Chi-san?
Itachi: Uh……….
Uh-huh. See? Ok, well, I do not own Naruto.
Naruto: YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT! No one owns me!!
Bad fox. Sit!
Naruto: Meep…
Also. Barney basher in the end. Yeah. Sort of violent, in a way…ok!
"So, umm…what disease do you want to work on?" Sakura asked.
"I don't care" Sasuke said, emotionlessly.
"How about…um…leukimia?"
"Hn"
"Sasuke…"
"Oh, no chicken's ass comment?"
"Too lazy" Sakura shrugged "Now do you want to do leukimia or not?"
"Hn"
Sakura scowled "Sasuke!"
"Hn. Fine."
Sakura grinned at her small accomplishment.
"Can I use your computer?" she asked.
"Hn"
"I'll take that as a yes" Sakura sighed and sat her butt on the computer seat.
She went online on wikipedia and searched for leukimia.
-
-
-
"Sa—whaa!" Sakura tripped on a tomato…when she walked over to Sasuke. She fell in an awkward position on him.
Her head was on his chest and her arms appeared to be straddling his waist.
He's warm... Sakura thought.
SNAP OUT OF IT AND GET OFF OF HIM!!!
But he's comfy...
SAKURA!!!
Oh crap...what's wrong with me?
"Sakura. Do you mind getting off of me?" Sasuke spoke up.
"Eh? Oh…wait…uahh!!" Sakura quickly sprang up with a heavy blush on her cheeks.
That's almost ador—
NO. I REFUSE! I REFUSE TO ALLOW YOU TO HAVE ANY FEELINGS OF AFFECTION TOWARDS A GIRL!!
But you can't deny the tru—
TRUTH?!! TRUTH?!!!! Oh. Yeah you're right that was the truth.
See? Now go away.
-sticks tongue out-
"You chicken's ass. Mind not staring at me like that? It's making me feel weird" Sakura said.
"Hn? I wasn't staring at you. I was simply staring off in space as I fought with my inner self."
Sakura's eyes widened a small amount.
"You do that too?"
"Hn"
"Dammit! Can we just have a conversation without a 'hn' for once?"
"Hn" Sasuke shrugged, clearly enjoying Sakura's frustrated face.
"Hmm…how about if I told you a secret?"
Sasuke's ears perked up.
Sakura cleared her throat "Oh! Dearest Sasuke! I love you dearly. More than anything else in the world! You are my life! The part of my soul I will die without! Please stay with me until the ends of the universe! Oh!"
Sasuke glared at Sakura, muttering 'fangirl'.
"Hey! I never said that it was my secret. And no. I am not a fangirl. I would rather go back to the Dark Heiress group than do that" Sakura said.
"Dark Heiress group…you were a member?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow "That doesn't seem right. Seeing that they're a group of blood thirsty sluts that prey on men and women alike"
Sakura giggled "Heehee. That was fun. The feeling of blood on your skin. What's more. It wasn't your own"
"I heard a rumor that there was a member that killed without hesitation or regret. A master at hand to hand combat. She had a tremendous strength. And she was an expert on medical duties." Sasuke spoke. A lot. Whoa.
"Yep. That's meeeeee" Sakura grinned.
Sasuke looked at her strangely.
They've known eachother long. But how could he not know that she was a Yankee. Probably another secret that she kept. He remembered, barely, that when from age 9 to 13, Sakura didn't hang out with Naruto and them as much as she did.
"You?"
"Oh, yeah. Why was there a tomato in the middle of nowhere?" Sakura blushed slightly, recalling the 'incident'.
"Uh..." Sasuke hesitated.
How should I tell her this...?
"I like tomatoes"
GREAT! FLAT OUT SAY IT!
Sakura laughed.
Wow. She has a cute laugh.
Pssh...what happened to'STOP IT! I will not allow you to display affection to a woman' or something like that.
Oh, now you decide to talk.
Hn.
You're completely hopeless, you know that!??!
Leave.
Hn right back at you buddy boy!
"Sasuke. You're staring again." Sakura blushed "Inner fight?"
He didn't reply.
"COME BACK HERE BOB!!!" Itachi cried as he ran and looked into Sasuke's room.
"Oh his Sakura." He paused "SAKURA!!!!" Itachi did something un-Itachi like. He glomped Sakura, embracing her tightly.
"-chokes-gasps-can't breathe-choke-losing air-turns blue-"
"Oh! I'm SO sorry Sakura!!" Itachi cried and quickly released.
Sakura could have sworn that he…The GREAT Uchiha Itachi…blushed.
What's he doing hugging MY Sakura?!! I'll kill him!!
She's not yours...
ADMIT IT! YOU WAAAANNNNTT HER!
No I don't. Now go away before I make you.
"Chi-san? What's wrong?"
Itachi fake anime cried.
"BOB RAN AWAY!!! AND HE ATE DEEDEE!!"
Sakura gasped and cried with him "Why would Bob eat a chicken?!!"
"I-cry-I don't know!!" he managed to get out.
"That's…that's so terrible!!" Sakura hugged Itachi as they cried their hearts out, like Naruto and Kiba had when they found out that Sakura had Orochimaru as a teacher.
"Now I'll never be able to wash your chicken!! NEVER!!" Sakura bawled.
Insane maniacs... Sasuke thought as he watched the 2 crying teens on his bedroom floor.
He was suddenly attacked by an invisible force on his head.
Hey, what the—
"Sasuke? What's wrong?" Sakura wiped a tear and watched. AMAZED.
"Some, oof, things biting at my head" Sasuke winced.
"Bob. Bob is eating Sasuke's head since it looks like a chicken's ass!" Sakura gasped and pointed.
Itachi turned and faced his brother. His eyes widened like saucers.
"BOB!! STOP HARASSING SASUKE!!" Itachi ordered.
"What are you talking about?!!" Sasuke turned around but didn't see anything.
Then slowly an image carved itself into his mind. He knew in reality, there was nothing there, and he was just growing insane. It was a UNICORN.
"AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(and so on)
-------------------------------------------
Hello my super awesome coolio readers!
Naruto: RAMEN RAMEN RAMEN!! Oh hey, Kakashi-sensei.
Kakashi: Naruto. –glares- Have you seen Fred?
Naruto:…Who's Fred?
Kakashi: The cow –scowls-
Naruto: Uh…no…
Kakashi: AHH! FRED!! COME BACK HERE! ALL I WANT TO DO IS SLICE YOU UP WITH THIS BUTCHER'S KNIFE!! –takes huge knife out of nowhere-
Kakashi-san…what are you doing?
Kakashi: I think that oversized DALMATION, took my Paradise Series!! AND ATE THEM!!!
No…
Kakashi: Yes!
No…
Kakashi: YES!
No…
Kakashi: YES!!
No. The cow couldn't have taken them. Since I've got them right here –shows books- they're pretty interesting. But I think I'm going to burn them now.
Kakashi: -super SUPER SUUUPERRRR glare- RARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh crapskys…AHHH!!! -runs away-
Kakashi: COME BACK HERE!! ALL I WANT TO DO IS SHOOT YOU WITH THIS BAZOOKA!!!
Naruto: Have I been completely forgotten here?
Itachi!!! HELP ME!! –hides behind Itachi-
Naruto: Apparently, yes. –goes away and sulks-
Itachi: What's wrong?
I'm hiding from Kakashi. He wants to kill me! Help me PLEASE!!
Itachi: Sorry. I just got my nails done.
Deidara: Yup! Me too, un.
-whimpers- TRAITORS!!!
Itachi: Eh…
-cries- Fine! Then I'm going to make Butt eat the Icha Icha books and then Kakashi will kill him instead of ME.
Itachi: -gasps- You wouldn't.
-smirks evilly- I would.
Itachi: NO!! BUTT!! STAY AWAY FROM THE EVIL GIRLLLLLL!!!!!!
------A LITTLE CUT FROM THIS SCENE.
Itachi – 4
Deidara – 3
Itachi: You actually got that close to my score? But I'm super prettyful and hot!
Deidara: Well so am I, buddy.
Itachi: Hn…we'll see. BUTT! Get over here and smash Deidara's face!!
Itachi! Stop it! You owe your loyal fans kisses! You too Birdy-chan!
Deidara: YAAAAAYYYY!!! First kiss is to xSuicidalTendenciesx –kisses and blushes-
Itachi: -Looks away and kisses xSuicidalTendenciesx too-
Next!
Itachi and Deidara: -Give kisses to Atome Hanyou-
Itachi: I was called hot by Atome-chan.
Deidara: Pssh. So was I. Yeah.
Itachi: I'm hotter.
Deidara: I'm hottest!! YEAH.
Itachi: YOU WANNA TUSSLE PLAYDOH?!!
Deidara: Can't. Nails. Un.
Itachi: So very true…
Er…ok? Well, next kiss is to Puritimen. From Deidara!!
Itachi: Someone else voted for him? No way.
Deidara: Like Puritimen said. DEAL. WITH. IT. Yeah.
It's ok, Chi-san! I think you are VERY pretty and I vote for you!
Deidara: -gives a kiss to Puritimen and giggles idiotically-
Don't mind him Puritimen-chan. Birdy tends to act like a freak.
Deidara: HEY!
Itachi! Where's my kiss!?
Itachi: Fine…-kisses quickly and looks away-
NYA! I ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Sasuke: Idiot.
Hey! Go away! You didn't make it past the pretty round!
Sasuke: I shouldn't have either. I completely pass the drop dead gorgeous round and fall into godly.
You're so cocky. Now go away. Chi-san and Birdy owe kisses!! 33
Sasuke: Itachi…kiss? It's the sign of the apocalypse.
-sighs- Sakura?
Sakura: What?
Can you take Sasuke away and knock him unconscious?
Sakura: Sure.
Sasuke: What? But you're supposed to love me Sakura!
Sakura: Idiot. This isn't the anime or manga. –knocks Sasuke into 3 trees and K.O.!!-
Let's resume shall we?
LAST KISS!
Tari Shiro!! Itchi. Get over here before I drag your ass by force.
Itachi: Hey! Don't drag Butt into this!
I wasn't talking about Butt! Now get over here!!
Itachi: -sings Barney-
I love you
You love me
Let's get together and kill barney
With a great big pnch and a kiss from me to you!
Won't you shoot him with your pistol too?
Here you go Tari-chan! Itachi will kiss you. AND he wants to, right Chi-san?
Itachi: Yeah, sure, why not.
That's not how you tell someone that you are willing, baka!! –smacks weasel in the back of the head-
Itachi: Oww…
Get on with the cute lil kiss. I don't have all day you know?
Itachi: Yes. Ok. –kisses Tari Shiro-
OKIE!!
Um…new competition!!
Who is the cooliest person ever?
Naruto.
Kiba.
Shika?
Chouji.
The Chicken's ass.
Sasuke: My name's Sasuke, dammit!
Whatever…er…
Itachi.
Birdy. A.K.A. Deidara.
Kisame.
ORRRRRRRR…
ME!!!!!
You'll have about 1 week to vote!! I think…yeah. Ok!!
THE END.
