Dear Diary

What a horrible, horrible day I've had today. Not only did I absolutely freak Harry out by having a nightmare, but also I told him he reminded me of Tom Riddle. Who would want to hear that they reminded you of one of the most powerful dark wizards of our time's younger self? Oh it's too terrible.

I get squeamish when I think about, but thankfully, I haven't had to worry about seeing Harry today. My colds got a million times worse and I've decided to stay in bed all day. I haven't seen his since I ran out of the room last night, and I don't want too ever again. Oh what am I talking about? Of course I want to see him again, I just wish that last night never happened. Maybe there's a spell around that can do it?

It's worth checking out, but at the moment the solitude of my room is perfectly satisfactory. I can't wait to get to Hogwarts so I can avoid him, this house is so claustrophobic sometimes. I still can't believe I was so stupid. I probably said one of the most hurtful, nasty things to someone I've ever said - and it was to Harry.

Oh god, kill me now, please.

I've got to go.

Love Ginny.

I put my pen down and swiftly hid my diary and snuggled down into my bed, wrapping the thick folds of material around my bunged up head. Why oh why did I say that last night? It was so obviously Harry - how could I be so stupid?

'Knock Knock' came a cheerful voice on my bedroom door.

'Hmmm' I said, opening my eyes slightly to look at the person who had just walked into my room.

'Hey Ginny, I got you some soup' said Hermione, kneeling down by my bedside.

'Thanks' I told her, propping myself on my elbows.

'God you look terrible' said Hermione, before blushing, 'No offence I mean, you've just that sickly look to you, and there's a whole set of luggage under your eyes.

'Oh gee, thanks Hermione' I said sarcastically, not bothering to tell her the eyes weren't from the cold, it was from the whole night I had spent awake.

'Don't worry, your mom's found the cure, she's cooking it up right now, you should be able to come downstairs in half an hour. You can help me beat Harry and Ron at chess' said Hermione playfully.

'Uh uh, no way, I'm staying in bed' I said, spooning the thick chicken soup into my mouth, grimacing at my sore throat.

'Aw come on Gin, Harry'll be there' Hermione wheedled.

'Exactly' I muttered, instantly regretting it.

'Gin, you don't need to be embarrassed about him now. I think Harry's really made a friend in you this holiday' said Hermione knowledgeably, 'Anyway, he's a bit down today, he could do with some cheering up'

I nearly choked on my soup, as I looked fearfully at Hermione - had Harry told her? I sighed in frustration and bit my lip as I thought about last night. Against all hope and prayers my eyes started to get blurry with tears, and unfortunately Hermione was still in the room. Before I could stop myself the salty tears began to trickle down my face, and I drew in a shuddery breath, trying to control my emotions.

'Ginny? What's wrong? Oh come here' said Hermione anxiously pulling me into a hug. I shrugged her away and wiped my face forcefully with the back of my hand, cursing myself for being such a baby.

'I'm so stupid' I scolded myself.

'Ginny - your not stupid. Never think that' Hermione reprimanded me, looking intently into my eyes, 'What's wrong?'

'I did something really stupid Hermione' I said gloomily, picking at the fraying edge of my pillow, willing Hermione to get up and leave.

'What?' 'I said something incredibly, amazing stupid and hurtful to Harry last night. I didn't mean to, it just came out and now-' I whispered, struggling against my tears again.

'Come on Ginny, you can tell me' said Hermione, settling on the bed in front of me, obviously not about to go away.

I took a deep shuddering breath, and launched into the story of what happened last night, starting with my dream, and waking up and then what I said to Harry. I felt my face flush an impossibly deep shade of red when I told her what I'd called him, and what he'd said.

'Oh Hermione, what am I going to do?' I cried after I finished, clutching my face in my hands with fresh tears pouring down my face.

'Oh Ginny, it's not as bad as you think. You apologised, I'm sure Harry doesn't hate you. He been called a lot worse than that you know' said Hermione, shocked at the state I was in I think.

'It is as bad as I think, nobody ever said he was like Tom did they? I can't believe I said it, I was so upset, and it's been hovering in the back of my mind for ages. What's he going to think of me now?' I cried.

'Don't worry Ginny, he has a lot more important things to think about, we all do. You wait and see, it'll all be forgotten in a few days, and we'll laugh about this' said Hermione consolingly.

I gave a watery smile, hoping against all hope that Hermione was right.

'That's better, now you eat your soup, and I'll bring up your medicine in a minute. I'll go and speak to Harry, and we can go down and have a game of chess' said Hermione brightly.

She gave me an encouraging smile, and walked out the room. I ate a few more spoonfuls of the soup, and then poured the rest of it down the sink. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I'm anorexic or something - I just can't stand the huge meals that everyone eats in this house.

Half an hour later Hermione came in, smoking goblet in hand, forcing me to drink every last bitter drop.

'Lets face the music' said Hermione pulling me out of bed. I threw on a pair of jeans, and donned a baseball cap Bill had sent me after a visit to America. I loved the cap because it always smelled of him, and the long peak could be a useful aid when you wanted to hide your eyes. It was a favourite for long family picnics and long lost relative meetings as I could safely sleep while looking as though I was merely shy.

The potion began to take effect and my nose was getting a lot clearer as I stumbled down the stairs, feeling as though my legs were under the jelly legs curse. I walked into the living room, and realised that Harry was there - sitting right next to Ron. My stomach gave a horrible guilty churn as I watch my feet doing the walking. I could feel his eyes on my back, and I flopped into the seat furthest away from them regretting coming out of the warmth and security of my bed.

'Are you feeling better Ginny?' came a voice from the opposite side of the room. I looked up, and my eyes met a pair of startling green ones looking right at me, accompanied by a small smile. I felt the familiar feelings of a flush creeping up my neck, and felt like I did when I first knew him - shy and stupid.

'Ginny? Are you ok?' he asked again - apparently worried by the amount of time it was taking me to answer.

'Uh yeah, I'm fine now' I said stupidly a few moments later - why can't I put together a normal sentence? I sat in my chair, acutely aware of Ron's bewildered stare, Hermione's beaming smile, and Harry's thoughtful expression.

I gave an uncomfortable squirm and I wished they would stop staring at me and do something. While secretly wondering if Harry had really forgiven me, or whether Hermione had put him up to it. Finally the three got down to their own work. Ron and Harry were playing chess, and Hermione came and sat by me, and we played exploding snap for while. The sun was sinking and soon I could hear mum rattling pots and pans ready for dinner.

'We should go and help your mum make dinner Ron' said Hermione, urging Ron away from the room for no reason I could imagine.

'Yeah ok' said Ron grudgingly abandoning the game and following her out of the room.

I laughed to myself at Hermione, but inside my heart was thudding uncomfortably, again I was all alone with Harry - but I wish I was just on my own. My thoughts returned to last night, and I covered my face with my hands in horror of the thought. I wonder is Harry really had forgiven me, or am I asking too much? The seconds crawled by, and I fidgeted nervously, aware of the uncomfortable silence in the air. The whole house seemed still, even the twins were being quiet, and it was if the whole place was holding its breath, waiting for something.

'Listen Harry about last night...' I started, keeping my eyes safely hidden beneath the cap.

Forget it, it's not important' said Harry bluntly.

'It is though. I'm really sorry, I didn't know what I was saying I was so distracted by my nightmare and it was dark and I couldn't see you, I was just being paranoid' I tried to explain, trying to make him understand my completely stupid blunder.

'I understand. Really I do. Now lets just forget about it ok?' said Harry, obviously uncomfortable with the conversation.

'No, I want you to understand that truly you aren't like him at all. Your the exact opposite to everything he stands for, you just look a little alike that's all' I finished meekly, realising my apology wasn't really going the way I wanted it to.

'It's ok Ginny, you don't need to be so apologetic. The same thoughts went through my head after the Chamber of Secrets and everything - even he said it. It's just one of those strange things' Harry told me.

I looked up for the first time, and saw that he was toying with a hole that was in the couch arm, pulling the fluff out of it. And it made me suddenly think, out of all the people in the world, were the only one's who ever knew what really happened in the Chamber, were the only ones that met Tom Riddle there. Sure, people had heard what had happened in the chamber, and people must have known Tom at school - but we were the only ones that were really there, and saw what he was capable of. I couldn't help but wonder, what Harry would have said when Tom told him they were alike, did he believe it? Did he accept it? Or did he fight back? I'd probably never find out, it was between Tom and Harry, he wasn't the kind of person to go around talking to people about things like that.

'You know, you think you get over something, but you don't really - it haunts you, comes back when you least expect it, and the smallest thing can trigger it off' I said to myself quietly but apparently loud enough for Harry to hear.

'Yeah well we've been through more than other people have, but you just have to let go Ginny. Accept it, deal with it and get over it. Tom can't hurt you anymore, you seem to live your life on edge, expecting him to turn up any minute' said Harry looking at me quizzically.

'I know. I do.' I said heavily, 'Do you do that though? Accept it, deal with it and get over it?'

'I try' shrugged Harry, 'You don't have to be afraid anymore Ginny'

I stared at him in wonder, as he got up and walked over to me, offering a hand to help me up.

'You really are nothing like him Harry' I said, as if suddenly realising something that was in front of my face the whole time.

'Thanks' he said, apparently accepting my earnestness as the final word.