Slow Burn – Chapter 7
Jed walked into Rachel's hospital room, spotting Tom still asleep in the armchair, his fingers laced through Rachel's. He was shocked at the state of them both, Tom had bags under his eyes the size of packing trunks and Rachel was pale as a sheet, evidence if it were needed of the blood loss she'd sustained as a result of her shooting. Ashley and Sam cast fearful glances at the pair and their Grandfather, looking for reassurance from someone that their father and the woman whose company they'd come to enjoy would be ok. Jed noticed the uneasy glances the children had cast between the sleeping pair and himself, and bent down to their level, enveloping them both in a hug.
"Hey now, quit worrying!" Jed told them firmly "Your dad and Rachel are two of the strongest people we know; they're going to be just fine"
"But Grandpa, someone shot Rachel!" Ashley replied "She...she looks so small, so pale"
"I know sweetie – but I spoke to the Doctors on our way in, they said Rachel's regained consciousness, and she's doing really well" He returned "Sure, she's going to need blood transfusions, and a lot of physio, but she's a tough cookie!"
"But what about Dad?" Sam asked, still worried
"Rachel's a good friend of your Dad's, and he's been really worried about her" Jed told the boy "He's just tired, and he's not long had surgery himself, probably pulled a few stitches saving Rachel, but he'll be fine – Doc Rios said they'd checked him out after Rachel was out of surgery"
The children nodded, apparently reassured for now and walked over to the sleeping pair, touching them gently, being careful not to jostle Rachel's injured shoulder. Tom stirred and smiled broadly as he saw who'd wakened him, hugging the two children firmly, before standing and repeating the gesture with his father.
"Boy am I glad to see you guys, when did you arrive?" Tom said happiness colouring his tone as he hugged the three of them again, as if needing the reassurance they were really there.
"We got the first transport we could outa Norfolk, Mike saw to that, knew we'd be worried once we heard the news" Jed replied, watching the consternation on Tom's face.
"News? Word's got out already?" Tom asked incredulously, surprised to hear than even with communication still so spotty in places, that news of the assassination attempt on Rachel had already reached the East Coast.
"The Ham radio network's been busy, you guys aboard the James? You're heroes to most people now" Jed told him "Folk have been stopping by the hospital asking for news apparently"
Tom sat down, Ashley and Sam still wrapped in his arms as he took in the news that he and his crew had become "celebrities" of a sort, and heartened by people's concern for Rachel. He hoped that the news would encourage someone to reveal the shooter's location, although given he'd barely left Rachel's side since the shooting, the man could've been tried, convicted, and sentenced by now for all he knew.
"Have they caught the shooter? Mike hasn't been by, so I just assumed he was co-ordinating the hunt?" Tom asked "I've not left Rachel since the surgery, didn't want her waking up alone"
Jed could see the love in his son's eyes, and it gladdened his heart to see it; he'd noticed Tom was opening up more about Darien's death, and had told him he'd had his own "funeral" in private for her. It meant Tom was finally letting go of his grief, and was ready to begin the process of moving on, his son wasn't a man meant to be alone. Jed had taken a liking to the feisty British Doctor when he'd had the chance to speak to her, and listening to his son speaking about Rachel in their weekly chats, he knew Tom cared deeply for Rachel, deeper than even Tom had realised.
"Yeah son they got him – he was tried, sentenced, and convicted pretty quickly, the President didn't want it dragging on" Jed replied "Not sure how legal a trial it was, but I'm not sure many folks cared"
"I certainly don't, spares me the ordeal of having to testify against him" A scratchy voice piped up, causing every head on the room to swing in her direction. Tom smiled tenderly; glad to hear her voice, rusty as it was from disuse.
"Morning sleeping beauty" he said softly, caressing her face gently, he would've said more but two small voices interrupted him excitedly.
"Doctor Rachel!" Sam and Ashley cried in unison "You're awake!" The two children dashed over to Rachel's bedside and hugged her gently, being careful not to knock Rachel's injured shoulder.
"Hello luv's!" Rachel said, genuinely touched they'd come to see her. "How are you? I swear you've both grown!"
She'd taken a shine to Tom's two children, especially Ashley who reminded her a lot of herself at that age. All except for their father – not for the first time she wished her own parent had possessed half the parenting skills Tom Chandler did.
"I've grown a whole 2 inches!" Sam crowed happily, beaming.
"Have you indeed? Well perhaps your Grandpa had better cook for me then, help me get better quicker" Rachel replied, ruffling Sam's hair affectionately.
"I'm glad you're ok Dr Rachel, maybe I can come back tomorrow and read the rest of Pride and Prejudice with you? We never did get to finish it" Ashley said hopefully, smiling happily.
"Well if you can get your Dad or Grandpa to bring you over sweet girl, I'd love to – good company and a good story will pass the time better than counting spots on the wall!" Rachel joked, enjoying the sound of Ashley's childish laughter.
"Sweetheart, I'm real glad to see you're going to be ok – and I'd be happy to bring Ash over, if you're sure it won't be too much?" Jed told her, glad to see Rachel awake and talking.
Rachel returned Jed's smile, thinking how different the Chandlers were to her own dysfunctional family. She was truly touched at the way they'd seemingly adopted her into their circle, and the sincerity of their affection for both her and each other.
"I'd love the company, it will be a refreshing change from the physioterrorist's I understand will be gracing me with their tender ministrations" Rachel said, not looking forward to the promised visit of the physiotherapists Tom had quietly informed her would be coming to oversee her recovery now she was awake.
"Dad, kids, Rachel needs her rest and you guys still need to unpack" Tom reminded them "Say your goodbye's kids, you can come back and visit tomorrow ok?"
"Ok Dad – bye Dr Rachel, see you tomorrow" the children chorused as they followed a smiling Jed out of the hospital room. Tom returned a few minutes later, an apologetic smile on his face.
"Rachel, I need to take my Dad and the kids to our new house – they're exhausted from the flight and don't know St Louis at all" Tom told her ruefully "I'll be back as soon as they're settled. Kara, Danny, and Bertrise said they'll be coming to visit in about an hour, will you be ok till then?"
Rachel smiled and reached out a hand to squeeze his, trying to quell the rising sense of fear she felt, unable to grasp where it had come from.
"I'll be fine Tom, Nurse Thomas and her colleagues are right outside, and I've got my call bell if I need anything" she replied, waving the call bell in Tom's direction " I'll be just fine"
Tom nodded, noting uneasily the panicky look he'd seen so briefly in Rachel's eyes, it made him wonder what psychological scars Rachel would have from her attack. He leaned down and kissed her slowly, resting his forehead against hers for a moment, before stepping back and walking out of the room. Rachel closed her eyes and touched her fingers to her lips, which were tingling from Tom's kiss and delighting in the giddy, joyful feelings coursing through her body. It was these emotions she tried to cling onto, rather than the sense of fear, unease, and helplessness that kept threatening to overwhelm her. They made her feel as if she needed to be on guard, against what Rachel couldn't say, her attacker according to Jed had been caught, and the guard who had been so briefly withdrawn had been swiftly replaced along with another. She recognised both Miller and Wolf from the James's crew, so no-one else would even get close enough to harm her whilst she was recuperating. Rachel picked up her copy of Pride and Prejudice, well thumbed from many re-readings, but found herself unable to concentrate on the story she normally found herself able to lose herself in easily. When Danny, Kara, and Bertrise finally arrived after an hour, Rachel would've leapt out of the bed to greet them had her legs not been so weak from disuse.
"Hi Doc, good to see you awake!" Danny hugged her gently, followed swiftly by Kara and Bertrise, both of whom had tears of joy in their eyes.
"Geez gang, do I look that bad that its making you cry? And Its Rachel, please – Kara I can't believe how big you've gotten! You're blooming sweetheart!" Rachel laughed, happy to see the three people she considered to be her closest friends aboard the James, after Tom and Tex.
"Rachel...we nearly lost you, the whole crew's been praying for you, heck Bacon's been tearing St Louis apart to find Camomile Tea for you, the XO's been wearing a hole in the floor pacing, and the Captain...he's not left your side since the shooting" Danny told her, smiling "You're one of us, Doc, we care about you, and we're damn glad you're ok!"
"Danny's right, and I'm glad you're ok 'cause no-one else is delivering this kid except you, so hurry up with the recovery!" Kara laughed "As for blooming, that's one word for it!"
Bertrise hugged Rachel again, adding "You've been like a mother and sister all rolled into one for me; my life wouldn't be the same without you".
Rachel could feel the tears forming in her own eyes, touched at Danny's words that the crew had been so worried about her. She'd never been quite sure how the crew had perceived her after the Sorensen incident, and had missed the sense of oneness, of belonging she'd felt prior to it. It cheered her beyond words to know she hadn't lost their goodwill, they were remarkable people, family even – to know she hadn't lost that made her heart lift.
"Well if that's the case, can I ask a favour?" Rachel asked the trio.
"Name it" Kara replied firmly.
"Could someone take me to the shower and help me wash? I want to get out of this damn bed and into something other than this wretched hospital gown!" Rachel said tugging at the unisex gown she was still wearing "Danny, any chance you could get me something other than hospital food? Please?"
The trio nodded, relieved to have something they could do to help their friend after the helplessness they'd felt whilst Rachel had been asleep. They'd all hated the sense of frustration they had all felt, unable to do anything but watch, pray, and talk to her unconscious form, and support their Captain as he watched over his beloved Rachel. Danny left Rachel in the care of Bertrise and Kara, whilst he drove the short distance back to the hotel the Nathan James's crew had taken over whilst the ship was in dry dock. Tracking down Bacon, he'd relayed Rachel's request to the cook and his team, who needed no prompting to carry out Rachel's request. The Hotel's kitchen staff had been more than willing to assist them, knowing this woman was the reason they all had hope for the future. Back at the hospital, Kara and Bertrise had helped Rachel to the shower using the bathing chair that had been helpfully supplied by a kindly healthcare assistant, Hayley, who had also demonstrated how to assist Rachel without hurting her. Despite her frustration and annoyance at having to rely on others to do what she so desperately wanted to do for herself, Rachel nevertheless delighted in the simple pleasure of a shower, clean clothes, and being out of bed. She sat still; enjoying the simple pleasure of having her hair brushed and plaited by Bertrise, knowing it wouldn't be long before she could do it for herself again.
"Thank you, both of you – it's so nice to feel...human again" Rachel said "Hope Danny hurries back with that food, though!"
Kara and Bertrise laughed along with her, glad to see Rachel smiling and laughing, after days of watching her lie so still in that bed, not knowing if she'd make it. Kara though watched Rachel closely; she hadn't missed the tense set of Rachel's shoulders as they'd wheeled her into the hospital corridor, a tenseness that had remained until they'd returned to her room. Serving in the armed forces meant Kara had seen post traumatic stress before, and knew there was more than a good chance it could affect the doctor she'd come to see as a friend and ally. She resolved to speak to the Captain, no Chief of Naval Operations – she had to think of him as that now, about it though chances were he'd considered it himself. The sound of the door being swung open caused Rachel's head to snap up, her whole body tensing before relaxing as she recognised Danny returning with the food she'd asked for. Danny noticed the slightly fearful look in Rachel's eyes that had vanished as soon as she'd recognised him, and a glance over her head at both Kara and Bertrise told him they'd noticed it too.
"Here you go Rachel, it's just something simple, but Bacon and co were only too happy to help out, they send their love by the way" Danny told her "I passed several of the James's crew on my way back, they all send their love too, glad to know you're ok"
The four of them chatted and laughed their way through the food Bacon had sent, as Danny, Kara, and Bertrise brought Rachel up to speed with all the gossip, developments, and news she'd missed. Danny noticed the apprehensive look that appeared suddenly on Rachel's face, and decided to test their new friendship with a little advice.
"Rachel, I've been in your position before, but I'm military, so I've no idea what it's like for you, being a civilian" Danny paused, before plunging on "All I'll say is if you need anything, we're here for you, all of us – you're one of us now, and the Nathan James's crew stick together, we're family now"
Rachel looked down for a moment, touched beyond measure to know that the crew, especially these three wonderful people, considered her one of them, considered her family. To have the Chandlers, and now the James's crew bring her into their family was a gift she'd treasure, and something she'd been looking for all her life. Now Rachel realised she had to find a way to get past the walls she'd spent a lifetime building, find a way to reach out and trust them, because she'd never found anything she'd wanted more.
"Thank you, so very much, I'll remember that" Rachel told them, tears threatening to fall.
"You do that, Rachel, we're here for you" Bertrise told her, Kara and Danny nodding in agreement, reaching over to squeeze Rachel's hand gently.
"Hey you three, I thought I asked you to cheer Rachel up, not make her cry!" Tom's voice broke into their consciousness, making all three break into laughter again. No-one missed how Rachel's face lit up like a beacon at the sound of Tom's voice, her eyes shining with the love they all knew she felt.
"Oh hush you! They were being good friends Tom!" Rachel chided him gently, grinning happily. Normally, she'd never have displayed her feelings so openly, but Rachel knew she could trust her friends, knew they wouldn't judge her or Tom.
"Captain...sorry Admiral, can Danny and I have a quick word before we go?" Kara asked her former CO "Bertrise, we'll just be a minute, but we'll walk you back to the hotel, Rachel we'll see you tomorrow, if it's ok to come and visit again?"
"Of course it's ok silly! It'd be lovely to see you again, and thank Bacon and the crew for their kindness" Rachel replied, accepting the hug Kara gave her as she left, Danny followed suit and followed his fiancée out of the room with Tom in tow.
Tom followed Danny and Kara out of the room, wondering what exactly they had to say that couldn't be said in front of Rachel. He had an idea though, feeling it was more than likely related to the look of fear he'd seen so briefly in Rachel's eyes, along with other small "incidents" he'd witnessed himself since Rachel had awoken the previous night.
"What's up you two? Is there something wrong?" Tom asked, his face creased with a frown.
"Sir, it's...well it's nothing concrete, but there were a few things today that made us think Rachel...well she could have PTSD" Kara said softly "When Bertrise and I arrived, Rachel asked us to help her shower, she can't do it herself with her shoulder. When we took her out of her room, along the corridor, she was tense, almost hyper alert, really until we got back to her room"
Danny picked up the story as Kara finished, relating the small incident they'd all witnessed.
"When I came back into her room tonight, she was startled, afraid when the door opened until she saw it was me sir" Danny said "I guess she's more relaxed now, since she didn't show the same reaction when you came in just now"
Tom nodded thoughtfully, it fit with the things he'd witnessed, such as the way she'd nearly jumped out of her skin when the night staff had come in to administer her night time medication. He'd been afraid that this might happen; Rachel had never directly been in the line of fire, despite her experience of war zones as a doctor.
"Thanks for telling me, I appreciate it" Tom replied "It fits with some things I've seen myself, the hardest thing is going to be getting Rachel to admit she has a problem and agreeing get help, she's a proud woman"
Danny and Kara shared a speaking glance, before Kara spoke up again.
"It'll come better from you sir, the three of us, we're her friends, but you're the one she loves...sir" Kara replied, blushing at her words, hoping the Captain would take her words in the spirit they were intended. Tom noticed the blush, but knew it was a mark of how much things had changed, had brought them all closer that both Kara and Danny felt comfortable enough to bring such personal issues to him.
"Thank you both, it's good to know Rachel has friends that care for her" Tom told them "And you're right, I do love Rachel but I hope you understand if I ask you to keep that to yourselves, the crew, my family... are aware of how things stand between Rachel and I, won't judge us but others...might not be so kind"
"We understand sir, and you're right, we'll keep it in the family for now" Danny replied.
"One more thing, as you know the President wants me to take up the position of Chief of Naval Operations, and for that I'll need a good assistant, someone smart, well organised, good with people" Tom paused "I know you're fast approaching the point where you'll have to leave the James Kara, so I was wondering if you'd be willing to accept the position?"
Kara stared at Tom for a moment, before her face broke into a huge smile and she nodded speechlessly, hugging herself with joy. Tom smiled back, Kara had been a brilliant TAO, and he had no doubt she'd be equally brilliant at running his office, he'd hate her to be wasted on a make-work position. He turned to the young SEAL who reminded himself so much of himself at the same age, Danny was perfect for the first stage in his plan to deal with the PTSD he'd begun to suspect himself Rachel might be developing.
"Danny, I need you to put together a few individuals to train Rachel in self defence, I don't ever want her to be so helpless again" Tom told Danny "If there's one thing this whole shooting has taught me, Rachel's a target, something we should've though of ourselves, but I'll be damned if she'll be so again!"
Danny nodded in agreement, he could already think of a few crew members who'd be perfect for this plan. They both shook hands with Tom before returning to Rachel's room to collect Bertrise, and say good night to Rachel before they left.
Tom followed them in, sitting down beside Rachel, taking her hand in his and lacing his fingers through hers, squeezing her hand tenderly. He knew damn well Rachel would realise something was up, the question was how much to tell her? Tom knew if he told Rachel what he, Danny, and Kara suspected she'd deny it with her last breath, he knew his lady love well enough to grasp that fact. From reading her bio, and chatting to Kelly Tophet, Tom knew Rachel was very choosy about who she allowed close to her, and had grown up with a family that was dysfunctional to say the least. Still, he was damned if he'd allow this PTSD to crush his and Rachel's growing relationship, not when they'd just found each other, and had the courage to take a chance on each other, not without a fight!
