"I see nothing has changed too much," Spinelli grumbled, sitting down next to TJ and Gretchen. She set her tray down and stared at her pizza. The Ashley's always bothered her, ever since she could remember. They were stuck up and prissy, and for the longest time, Spinelli always thought that was the reason why she hated them. But what if they were right?

Why did my parents name Ashley in the first place? Spinelli groaned out loud and went to slam her head on the table. She would have face planted in her pizza if TJ hadn't have moved her tray out of the way fast enough. A loud thud echoed through the cafeteria, making heads turn in their direction.

"You know, if you're trying not to get noticed, you're doing a terrible job," Gretchen whispered next to Spinelli's ear.

"I know," her voice muffled.

"Oh look, she's trying to hit herself out of existence!" Ashley A. laughed as the posy walked by their table.

"You're doing it all wrong Spinelli," Ashley B. said, flipping her long braid over her shoulder.

"Yeah, it'd be easier on everyone if you just died," Ashley Q. huffed.

"Yeah," Ashley T. laughed. The four walked off, leaving the three of them in shock.

"They've never been this mean before," Gretchen said, taking a bite of her tofu salad.

"Don't listen to them Spin. I need you in my life, and don't you ever think twice about it." TJ reached out and squeezed Spinelli's hand, making her feel a lot better.

The bell rang for the end of lunch and the three of them stood up to dispose of their meals.

"We'll I'm off. I'll see you guys after school, right?" Gretchen asked, hoisting her bag over her shoulders.

"Yeah, of course," TJ and Spinelli said together.

"Great, see ya," and like that, Gretchen was off, leaving the two best friends alone to walk to their next class.

"TJ, I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but what the Ashley's said, about me dying, I don't know, it's bothering me pretty badly."

TJ stopped dead in his tracks and stared at her. She shuffled her feet and suddenly felt ashamed for what she just said. He took her hands and pulled her into a hug, wrapping his strong arms around her waist.

"Don't ever leave me." He whispered in her hair.

She felt like crying. No one ever cared this much about her, except Joey.


Spinelli looked up into the sky, feeling the warm September breeze on her face. She tried to be thankful for what she has, for her friend and family, for TJ. But Ashley Q.'s words bounced in her head. It'd be easier on everyone if you just died. She sighed, telling herself over and over that they were just words and that she was in control of her own life.

At that moment it went dark. Someone put their hands over her eyes.

"Guess who."

"Gretchen." Spinelli answered, giggling.

"Are you kidding?" The hands pulled away to reveal TJ standing behind her.

"Yeah I'm kidding, geese." She laughed.

"Want to walk home or is Joey picking you up?"

"He had a thing after school so I can walk home," She said, adjusting the strap of her back pack.

"Great."

They started to walk down the street alone, talking about their new classes and their new teachers. The elementary school thought it would be a stressful transition for students going from only one teacher to six. They made it seem like a big deal. But TJ and Spinelli continued to talk and both agree they would much rather see six teachers for only an hour each than to see one teacher for six straight hours.

"Well, first day of middle school wasn't too bad," TJ said, stopping at Spinelli's drive way.

"Yeah, I guess," Spinelli kicked a rock that bounced off her mail box.

"Are you still thinking about what the Ashley's were saying?"

She turned red with embarrassment and looked away.

"How many times am I going to have to say it?" He took her hand into his and put it up to his chest. "You are my best friend. They have no idea what they're talking about. They don't know you like I know you. And you need to believe in me when I say you are very special."

She was at a loss for words. She didn't want this moment to end. TJ was being so kind to her and she just didn't want it to end. Everything around her seemed to stop, everything except her and TJ. She could feel his heart pound under her hand, easily syncing up to her own beat. It grew faster and faster until she finally pulled her hand away.

"Are you okay?"

He called me special.

"Yeah, I'm just tired."

He called me special.

"Okay, well, I'm going to head home,"

He called me special.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow,"

He called me special.

"Don't forget what I said Spinelli."

"I won't."

TJ waved good-bye and turned to head home, cursing himself for not doing what he really wanted to do. Spinelli turned on her heals and headed inside her house. She threw her jacket and bag in the closet and walked down the hall to the kitchen. She pulled out a bar stool and sat down, watching her mother cook dinner.

"How was school sweet-pea?" She asked.

"Fine," Spinelli replied.

"Go wash up for dinner, your brother will be home soon and dinner will be ready in five."

"Okay," she stood up and walked down the hall to her bedroom. She kicked off her boot and slipped her feet into her fuzzy bear slippers. All she wanted to do was flop onto her bed and pretend these feeling didn't exist. TJ was her best friend. If she grew feelings for him, what would that do to their friendship? How weird would it be fore the other guys? What would happen to the group if they couldn't work out at fight? What if they weren't really meant to be together? She grabbed a pillow and screamed into it. Why were feelings so complicated? She threw the pillow back onto the bed and walked out into the living room. Her dad was sitting on the couch watching tonight's wrestling match.

"Tonight's the Crusher's last match. He's retiring after this." Bob said, taking a sip of his beer.

"Huh," Spinelli said, sitting next to her father.

He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into a hug. He smelt like a dad, musky but in a good way. Comforting.

"How was my Pookie's first day of school?"

"It was fine," She said.

The front door opened and Joey walked into the house. He had a big grin on his face and his walk had a bit of a bounce in it.

"What's up with you?" Spinelli asked.

"Nothing, just the best day ever!"

Spienlli followed her brother into the kitchen who was then followed by their father.

"Well, tell me about it? How'd the interview go?" Flo asked.

"Great! They're going to check up on my references and I should hear something back in about four weeks."

"Interview? Interview for what?" Spinelli looked around at her family. They weren't telling her something.

"I had an interview with Yale. Your big brother's going to be a lawyer!" Joey yelled with excitement.

An anvil landed on her heart. Yale? That's on the other side of the country. Why would he want to go so far away?

"Good job..." Tears welled up in her eyes. She stood up and headed for the bathroom.

"Sweet-pea, are you okay?" Flo asked.

"Yeah, just got an eye lash in my eye. Go ahead and start dinner without me."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," Spinelli closed the bathroom door and sat on the toilet lid, letting the tears fall. Her big brother, the one person in her life who could do no wrong to her, who always stood up for her, who had always been there for her, is leaving next year for Yale. How could he do this to her? Didn't he love her? Didn't he love his family? If he did, then he would have applied somewhere closer. Her chest tightened as she cried more. Then a thought came to her; what if he doesn't get in? It was, in fact, just an interview. He said he would hear back in four weeks, maybe they'll deny him. But that would break his heart.

God damn it! Why was everything changing?