Hi, guys!
I'd like to know if you like how the story is going and if you don't I'd like to know how do you like it!
Have a great Sunday and enjoy the reading!
the old phib
Chapter seven: Let It Rain
17th September of one year before, some time later:
I suppose the worse thing of that morning, worse than the quarrel, worse than her words, was that during that night I had deceived myself things could go better…you know…you can be mad to someone you really love, you can because of a tons of reasonable reasons, but when that someone gets hurt or feels bad or whatever, well…it's like all your stupid rage suddenly vanishes…and all you can think in that exact moment, when you hold that someone in your arms trying to comfort her and hoping someway your love is enough to make her feel better – even if in the deep of your brain you perfectly know love by itself sometimes can't fix everything – is that you can't bare her pain, that you need she needs you, that you live just for her.
But then Matt…God…still Matt…maybe someway he was necessary, but…who knows…who knows…maybe her doubts…her founded doubts, I must say…founded because of me…because of my fuckin' mistakes…her doubts might become reality, right like a nightmare, so that then I could show her she might not fear anymore…not fear…
"My lovely miss Pierce!" Brittany heard saying as soon as she put her hand on the handle of Santana's office in order to enter, she inexplicably felt blushing and slowly turned herself back.
"Hi, Matt. I'm here for the…"
"Sure. Come. I'll show you where it is." he interrupted her with an engaging smile opening the door instead of her and waiting for her to go inside.
In that moment his look made her feel just uncomfortable…
"I hope you don't think I'm inappropriate, but I must say this dress fits you wonderfully." he continued without moving away his eyes from her.
"You're kind, but I think you might…just…you know…" she started to stammer. He seemed totally proud of himself.
"Anyway…that's what you come for. The keeper of all my and your boss' secrets." he said giving her the i-Pad case and locking his green eyes into hers.
"She's not my boss, she's just…well…it doesn't matter…thank you and…"
"Let's have a coffee, miss Pierce." he interrupted her.
She looked at him for a couple of seconds, then she gave him her hand in order to say goodbye.
"Thank you, but I don't think it's a good idea. And in addiction you might work there. So…goodbye, Matt."
He didn't loose the hold and strongly kept her hand.
"You know how they say: while the cat's away the mice will play. And you know also I'm not accepting your refusal. I know she keeps you in a short, but just a coffee, miss Pierce."
The blonde was still giving him her back, for some moments she stayed in silence, then she closed her eyes:
"Just a coffee."
Just a coffee…God…how much I would it was just a coffee…when we sat at one of the tables of a random cafeteria near the record company I couldn't hear what he said…I'm sure his speeches were smart and brilliant and engaging and whatever, but my mind was still full of what he had said to me before…"my and your boss"…"she keeps you in a short"…"your boss"…"your boss"…why the hell did he use that expressions? I thought. So is this the way people sees our relationship? Is this the way goes our relationship? He spoke, spoke and spoke and I nodded, nodded and nodded, I also smiled once in a while, just to pretend I was listening, but…I wasn't…I totally wasn't…because the only reason I was there was to prove to I don't know who the things he had said before weren't true…I was there just because I was angry. It's fool sometimes…our pride…our stupid pride…how many mistakes we do everyday because of our stupid pride…
When they went out of the cafeteria it was raining.
"Do you want a lift under my umbrella?" Brittany said while his hair became to wet giving to him a strangely hot experienced air.
"No, thanks. I love the rain. Sometimes it's the only thing that helps us washing away our control and doing what we really want to." he answer with confidence, then he came near her, with the hand pushed away her umbrella so that the rain began to wet her too and before she could protest he kissed her on the lips.
I don't know why I didn't rebel to that kiss…I don't know…maybe I wanted it too…maybe I was just mad at Santana…maybe there's not a reason…
"You see? It's just the power of the rain! Goodbye, my lovely miss Pierce." he exclaimed when their kiss ended, then with a little bow he turned back and went away leaving her there under the rain while her umbrella was still lying at her feet.
Now:
When Brit's cell phone vibrated it was nearly 4 o'clock p.m.
"I'm not angry because of your surprise, I'm angry because it reminds me how much perfect it was. But thank you. Delicious. Like it used to. San"
Like it used to…God…
"In the deep of my heart I'm totally sure it can be like that again. It took to me too much time and it took to you too much pain so that I can understand that, but I'll do all that I can and also all that I'm not able to yet to convince you it can. Brit-Brit"
That was the point. That was her point. All that she could and also all that she wasn't able to yet. Continuity. She needed continuity. She needed to show her that she didn't want to go away. She wanted to remain aside, right there near her 'till the moment she would say "yes, you can come in now", "yes, I'm ready now" , "yes, you can help me now".
Five past 5 o'clock p.m. Monday evening. Rainy evening. But the blonde had her umbrella. Like always. She never forgot to bring it when the weather was uncertain. Instead Santana did. She never remembered to bring it when the weather was uncertain. I perfectly knew that and so if I had some free time I went to the record company with my umbrella and when she stopped working I was there waiting for her to give her a lift so that she didn't wet.
And so I'll do, she thought that rainy Monday evening. And so she did. And so it was five past 5 o'clock p.m. when the blonde saw the brunette who hardly hid a spontaneous little laugh as soon as she caught the sight of Brittany waiting for her right out of the sliding glass doors of the record company with her stupid pink umbrella that Santana gave her eight or nine years before. Joey had said she would like to own an umbrella like the one of Mary Poppins so that she could fly where she wanted but Britt had commented that it had been a very sad kind of umbrella to fly around with it, pink would be better.
In that moment I felt just…don't know…right. Me, my pink umbrella, San, her kind look, her tiny smile…right…just right…
"Tell me you learned the lesson and you don't need my pink umbrella!"
Santana's look was sad in the deep, but she cutely smiled anyway.
"I'd like to, but I must say some things never change." she answered with her hot voice, then they looked at each other with waiting, but they both didn't seem to be in a hurry.
"Please, miss Lopez." the blonde whispered then raising the elbow of the hand that held the pink umbrella so that she could take her arm. For a couple of seconds the brunette stared at her with an indecipherable look, then she bit her lower lip and sighing made a step towards to her taking her arm.
One year passed. One entire year passed since the last time they had touched. One year. One year. But she didn't forget the sparks. A touch. A simple light touch was enough to bring her back in time. Santana…just Santana could make her feel like that…a touch, holy Christ! A touch! And she felt she was free to die now, now that she reached perfection…her soul was shaking inside her body…it's like her heart physically recognized the touch of something belonged to it…it's like her heart wanted to say her "don't let her go!"…
"I've never liked the rain." Brittany could finally say while they started to walk.
"I know. You said it's not fair someone else can decide instead of you that you have to wet."
The blonde laughed a little:
"I'm glad to see this time you studied, miss Lopez." she ended. Then they arrived at her car.
"C'mon, I give you a lift."
"Uh…no, you-you…you don't have to…if-if…" the blonde started to stammer thinking maybe she could feel forced.
"You know if I don't want to I won't." she pronounced clearly going inside her black car. Brittany imitated her no discussing. Santana started the engine and they left under the rain.
No one seemed to know what they were supposed to say and so they stayed in silence until they reached the first red light. Santana turned to the blonde who was staring at her. That look seemed to make her a bit embarrassed.
"What are you thinking 'bout?" she said in order to break the silence.
"I was thinking that you're so beautiful, right like the last time I saw you, but I see you also very very tired…aren't you?"
The brunette swallowed trying in a second to understand if she was the same person to she had said everything. The light became green.
"Yeah. I am."
In that moment I didn't know if I was supposed to touch her, but…who cares…
Brittany raised her left hand and kindly put her dark hair behind her ear, then she went down with her hand on the back of her shoulders and she began to make slow circles caressing it. Santana closed her eyes for a moment and suddenly two tears crossed her cheeks.
They went on simply like that, Santana silently crying and Brittany kindly rubbing her back. Twenty minutes later Santana parked near the footstep in front of the flat where the blonde lived. The brunette dried her eyes with her hands, Brittany was still looking at her like she had done during all the travel.
"I know I pissed all off and I made a thing that call the hugest mistake of my life would be a stupid euphemism, but the only thing I want you to know now is that now I'm here for you. I'm here, even if you don't trust me, even if you don't want me, even if you don't know what you wanna do. I am here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here and here I'm staying, waiting for you to make of me all you want to." the blonde firmly said, then before the brunette could neither open her mouth she abruptly went out of the car under the rain and she walked around the car until the driver's door, she opened it and the water started to wet Santana too, who didn't understand what the blonde was doing and looked at her with question. The rain careless fell down and the noise caused by its pouring forced the blonde to shout:
"One day someone said to me the rain sometimes is the only thing that helps us washing away our control and doing what we really want to! So come here now!"
The brunette a bit unsure obeyed like pulled by an invisible strength and for a couple of moments they stayed there under the rain pouring staring at each other. They were both crying melting their tears with the drops of rain. Then the blonde hugged her holding her light body tightest she could.
Ten minutes after Brittany came inside her house her cell phone vibrated one more time:
"I tried to forget you with all the strength I have, but now I can't bare anymore my unsuccessful attempts and all I'd like is forgive you. Help me 'cause I can't do it on my own. San"
Let me say now...I began to read "Color" and all I can think is that if people like its author is Glee's author maybe I'll like it more than I do!
RIB! Give us more Brittana!
;)
