Chapter 7 – Personal
At some point, they managed to pull the covers off to lay properly on the king size bed and the sheets lazily pulled up to cover their legs. The lights are off but the city lights seeps in, illuminating the room and their tangled bodies.
Santana is snuggled up to Brittany's side, a tan leg thrown across one of Brittany's legs and her left hand resting comfortably on Brittany's stomach. Brittany has an arm underneath Santana's head and her fingers lightly running up and down Santana's arm.
"Any siblings?" Santana asks, her raspy voice ringing through the darkness.
"I have a younger sister, Sarah. Freshman in high school. My parents and everybody say she's a lot like me but that munchkin is definitely a lot smarter than me," says Brittany. "Back in high school, I struggled to keep my grades up because back then all that mattered to me were dance and theater. I was lucky enough to even graduate. But Sarah?" Brittany shakes her head. "She's book smart. She's got her priorities straight, a good head on her shoulders even when she's an annoying little brat."
Santana smiles. She doesn't need to look above to her know that Brittany is proud of her sister. She can hear it in her voice and even though it's dark, she knows Brittany is smiling at the memory of her sister.
She envies it but doesn't let it get too far.
"You?" Brittany asks her and suddenly the smile on her lips fades away.
Brittany must have felt her tense up because Brittany's hand stops moving against her arm. "Sorry. That was incredible insensitive of me."
Santana shakes her head, placing a small kiss to Brittany's neck. "It's fine," she sighs before snuggling even closer to Brittany. "I don't have any siblings. Now that I think about it, I'm kind of glad that I don't have any siblings."
She feels Brittany move above her, probably to look at her in question but she doesn't move and just keeps her head nestled into the crook of Brittany's neck.
"I had a shitty childhood. I didn't want a brother or sister to go through the same thing. Sure I would have protected and took care of them, but to have them go through what I did? I wanted to save them from that kind of hell." Santana had begun drawing imaginary circles on Brittany's stomach, trying to distract herself from not letting tears from falling. "I turned out pretty okay, but who knows how my little sister or brother would have turned out."
She lets the words sink in between them but more for herself. She's never really discussed this topic before with anyone, not even with Mercedes. Sometimes when she would see families of four or more, she would look at them and feel like she was born at the other side of the coin. She'd see complete families who loved each other and so happy that sometimes it disgusted her, and then when she would look at hers, she only sees the shattered pieces of her family. Pieces that had cut her and damaged her in more ways than one that she had to rebuild herself with thicker skin, build up walls and put new pieces of herself back together.
To be able to live day by day without falling apart, she had to learn how to do it without her grandmother by her side because if anyone were to pull any of her pieces, she'd fall apart so quickly that she wouldn't know how to recover from it.
"I think you would have been a great older sister."
Santana lightly scoffs at Brittany's sentence finding it rather ridiculous. "Why do you say that?"
"Because like you said, you would have protected them."
She props herself up by her elbow looking at Brittany to elaborate. "Continue."
Brittany's lips quirk into a small smile and places her hand on the small of Santana's back as she continues. "Going by anything I know about you so far, you would have kicked someone's ass if they ever did anything to your younger sister or brother. And they would have turned out just like you because you were there to take care of them and love them and give them something your parents couldn't give, much like what your grandmother gave you," she pauses trying to see if Santana knew where she was going with this. It doesn't seem like it when the brunette furrows her eyebrows, so Brittany continues. "She gave you something to dream about and something to be passionate about. She gave you a future and that's hard to come by. So yeah, I think you would have been a great sister."
Something about what Brittany says strikes a chord in Santana and her stomach sinks because ever since the first words the blonde has ever spoken to her, she feels the pieces of herself that she's put together and the walls she's built were being pulled one by one and torn down so easily.
It scares her to the bone because she's never felt like this. The feeling of giving herself entirely to someone whom she's just met, leaving herself completely open to be hurt. But she's never felt this enamored before either. It filled her heart with such joy and warmth that it crawled in every part of her body and gave her a sense of life.
Brittany brought color into her world and she's going to savior every moment of it because she knew she's lucky to have found Brittany. She's lucky to have found something that's rare to come by.
So she leans over and touches Brittany's lips with her own, inhaling the blonde's scent and breathing into her mouth as she smiles when Brittany kisses her again.
"Thank you," she says when she pulls back.
"You're welcome, hun." Brittany quickly places a kiss on the tip of her nose. "Can I ask you something though?"
"Sure," she rests her chin on her palm, her left hand on the middle of Brittany's chest. "What is it?"
"You don't have to answer it, I mean, it's a sensitive topic for some people."
"Britt, we've pretty much talked about everything so ask away."
Her hand that was resting on Brittany's chest follows the rise as the blonde takes a deep breath. "Did your parents… ever… you know, physically abused you?"
Her eyebrows knit together as if to ponder the question and dig into her memory. After a moment, she shakes her head. "No, they never did. I mean, I'd get like a smack in the ass or the head or a pinch to the side but not to the point where they've severely beaten me that I needed to go to the hospital. What they did to me was more of an emotional abuse."
"Do you still talk to them?"
"No." she simply says because she really didn't want to talk about her parents anymore and somehow Brittany got the hint because she just smiles at her in understanding.
She sighs, her fingers lightly tracing the freckles that ran from Brittany's chest up to her neck, feeling the blonde slightly shiver at her touch. The skin on her back starts to burn again when Brittany's index finger walks the length of her spine.
"I'm guessing you speak to your family frequently then," she asks.
"Yup. I was actually on the phone with my mom this morning when I bumped into you."
She instantly mirrors the smile on Brittany's lips remembering it.
"She's probably checking on you to see if you knocked someone up," she jokes.
Brittany briefly laughs with her but then the hand on her back stops and the laugh fades when the blonde suddenly realizes something. She watches the changes in Brittany's expression and raises an eyebrow.
"Shit…"
"What?"
Brittany turns to her, eyes wide. "We didn't… we didn't use a… please tell me you're on contraceptives…"
All she can do is grin at the blonde, amused at how panicked Brittany is. She knows she shouldn't laugh at it because pregnancy isn't a laughing matter. But the longer she looks at Brittany with a pout on her lips it was becoming difficult for her. She found it adorable. She didn't want it to disappear but she didn't want the blonde to worry about something she shouldn't worry about either.
"Yes, I'm on the pill."
Brittany's head falls back on the pillow and a sigh of relief escapes her while her free hand comes to fall on Santana's hand that was on the blonde's chest.
"But you do get yourself tested, right?" Santana fires back her own concern.
The blonde lifts her head back up narrowing her eyes at her and it's another thing she finds adorable about Brittany.
"Of course I do. What do you take me for?"
She turns over Brittany's hand and threads her fingers with the blonde, an eyebrow quirking as she continues to tease the blonde. "Well, I heard you were with a model for a while and I know for a fact that models get around."
Brittany turns to look at her. "And how do you know that?"
"I dated a few models here and there," she simply shrugged. "They've told me stories and I definitely did not like that whole scene so after I slept with Cara Delevinge under a drunken state, I swore to never go there again. That's why I took off the other way when she was at the party earlier."
"I don't think I really want to hear about who you've slept with," she looks to see Brittany with a disapproving pout. She smiles, giving their hands a light squeeze. "Kind of ruins the bed talk."
"Okay," a light chuckle is under her breath before moving to sit around Brittany's waist, tossing the bed sheet off of them. Her hand ghostly climbs on the pale stomach that begins to shiver at her touch. "What do you want to talk about then?"
Brittany's hands had found themselves on her hips, Brittany's thumbs rubbing her hipbone in circles. There's a hint of a grin on thin lips and Brittany pulls herself to sit up kissing her softly. It takes her breath away just like any other times the blonde has kissed her. It makes her mind swim, her senses tripled, and causes her stomach to drop. The hands on her hips travel the length of her bare back making her skin burn all across her body.
She sighs into Brittany's mouth when the blonde momentarily pulls away just to kiss her again, the hands on the back of her shoulders pulling her closer as hot tongue explores the inside of her mouth. A moan escapes her and her hips begin rutting against Brittany's stomach. She feels the smile against her lips before her bottom lip is being pulled by pearly whites.
Brittany lets her lip go before assaulting her neck with open mouthed kisses and flicks of the blonde's tongue.
"This isn't exactly bed talk," she sighs rolling her head back. "Not even close."
Hot breath tickles her neck when Brittany chuckles against the skin but still continues to pepper her with kisses. "A minute ago you would have told me to stop talking and get on with the sweet lady kisses."
She laughs, loud, feeling it vibrate from her throat and stills her hips. "Sweet lady kisses?"
Brittany detaches her lips from her neck, peering up at her. "Yes, sweet lady kisses."
They stare at each other for a moments, a grin plastered on Santana's face as she combs through Brittany's hair. "You are something else."
A perfectly shaped blonde eyebrow raises and Brittany shrugs. "Yeah, I was totally banking on being one of a kind to impress you."
She shakes her head at the sarcasm, smiling as she kisses Brittany again. "You didn't need to."
"Yeah?" Brittany questions moving her hands down back tan hips.
"Mmhmm," she hums into Brittany's mouth as their tongues laced together.
Her hips picks up the motion again and she hears the groan that builds up within Brittany because hands are now gripping her ass. She has an inkling suspicion that Brittany wants the motion to be a little lower so when she frees her left hand from the blonde locks to reach behind her, she feels the hardened member in her hand. Brittany sighs into her mouth at the contact and she gives the head a light squeeze.
Brittany chuckles against her lips not expecting Brittany's hand to move to cup her wet center. She feels the blonde grin wider as she breathes at the way Brittany starts running fingers between her folds. She whimpers when Brittany flicks her clit with a finger. It was retaliation. And when her hand began to slide up and down Brittany's shaft, the blonde would match the rhythm with her fingers eventually slipping two fingers inside of her.
Every time she squeezes the head of Brittany's member in an upstroke, Brittany would curl her fingers deep inside her. It doesn't take much until her walls are squeezing Brittany's fingers as an orgasm rolls through her. Brittany gives her time as she pulls out her fingers. She catches her breath and watches as Brittany laps up her fingers that was coated with her juices and just like that, another round of arousal courses through her.
She raises her body, propping up by her knees. Instantly picking up on her motives, Brittany grabs hold of her throbbing member and guides it to her entrance. Slowly, she sinks her waist down letting Brittany stretch the inside of her walls again. And just like earlier, their eyes never break from one another moaning at the connection.
She trembles at the way Brittany's completely inside her, another orgasm threatening to come through but she wills her body not to, not just yet. Even her lips tremble as she kisses Brittany again, her body falling into the blonde's but Brittany's there to catch her as they fall back onto the bed.
Still on top of Brittany, she slowly starts to lift her hips up and sinks back down in repeated motions. She picks up the pace, pushing herself up with her arms and placing it on Brittany's breasts, feeling the fullness of them in her hands. Even through all the moaning, heavy breathing and between sweaty bodies, she feels Brittany's rapid heartbeat which she was sure matched her own. Its beating a million miles a minute and she thinks how is it possible to even feel this amazing.
Glazed winter blue eyes are still on her, her own brown eyes looking at them, and then Brittany's grabbing her ass again as the blonde meets her in a thrust. A loud gasp escapes her because Brittany's hitting that spot again and it's starting to make her entire body shake. Her upper body topples over but catches herself by holding herself up with her arms, her hands now mixed with the pool of blonde hair on either side of Brittany's head as so does her brunette hair cascading down.
Brittany groans as she continues to meet her rolling hips with thrusts, skin slapping on skin mixing with the moans leaving their lips. And then her walls are clenching around Brittany's member, her mouth agape before Brittany swallows her moans in a heated kiss as she comes. Her hips are still writhing, her walls clenching, and Brittany continues to push through and keeps hitting her deep.
She pulls away but Brittany's hand is quick and is grabbing a fistful of brunette locks to keep her in place, her mouth hovering over Brittany's.
"Ah, fuck!" she moans, thankful that Brittany is holding her up because her arms are ready to buckle beneath her as another orgasm is coursing through her quickly. "B-Brittany…"
Brittany's shaft is slick inside her, knows that their covered with her releases but her hips are still in their motion and Brittany shows no signs of stopping her deep thrusts. It makes her dizzy, feels her lungs burn because with every thrust, her breath gets knocked out of her.
She puts her weight in one arm as she reaches to frame Brittany's face that all sorts of contorted in pleasure just as the same as hers, and runs a thumb over the swollen bottom lip. Brittany kisses her thumb, it's a small gesture but it has her heart melting again and she's there to steal a breathtaking kiss from the blonde.
She hears Brittany moan through every other beautiful sound between them and feels Brittany's other hand that's still on her behind clutch even tighter. Her other arm finally gives out, her weight now completely on Brittany's as she feels her body beginning to feel that all familiar high again.
She rests her forehead against Brittany's, their mouths taking in every breath and every sound as the blonde wraps arms around her tightly. Her hips had drastically slowed down since then, every bit of her energy had gone the moment she collapsed in Brittany's arms. As did Brittany's thrusts, but they're long, drawn out and pushed back inside of her deep that hits the spectacular spot.
She knows that Brittany's close at the way pale arms are grasping her tighter. And then it all happens. It's like a bright light flashes behind her eyelids and her hot core hugs Brittany's shaft in pulses as she rides out another high. A mixture of a moan and a grunt comes from the blonde below, matching the volume of her own, as Brittany comes hard inside of her. The warmth fills her up, her hips bucking and Brittany still rolling her thrusts as the walls squeeze her dry.
They come back down with a groan, both breathing heavily, both completely spent. Santana's head had drifted down to the nook of Brittany's neck; Brittany's arms are limp around Santana's body.
It's not moments later when one of them finally moves as Brittany disconnects their joint bodies and Santana already missing the connection. Brittany then turns to steal away a soft, long, unhurried kiss from her, reviving her senses and she's there instantly to kiss Brittany back. Her hand frames Brittany's face, kissing her again and feels the blonde run a thumb on her cheekbone.
They pull away, only inches apart, and only looks at each other in silence as blissful smiles are etched on their lips. There are words are at the back of their throats but neither say them. But in some way, deep down, they both already know it.
"Is this how you planned your New Year's to be?" Brittany says instead.
"No, definitely not," Santana chuckles and shakes her head. Then her smile grows wider, a spark brighter than any gems in the world can match the glimmer in her brown chocolate eyes. "It's so much better."
That same glimmer is evident in crystal blue eyes also.
