AN: ....Hey there.... *hides behind a shield to protect self from flying rotten fruit and vegetables* Now I KNOW that you people all want to give me a terrible, slow, and hugely painful death that goes on for at least a year, but if you did that, then this story wouldn't be finished... Anyways, I don't really have an excuse... Just every time I tried writing, I couldn't write. I'm sure everyone can relate. So without further ado, let me direct your attention to the disclaimer!
Disclaimer: If Alex Rider belonged to me, I wouldn't be writing something with Disclaimer on it… Not mine people!
Chapter 7
How to Completely Ruin Chances of a Second Date
Eagle stared at Alex.
"What?" The boy snapped.
"Nothing… just wondering how you haven't crashed yet…" The man answered, still staring at his youngest unit mate nervously.
Alex rolled his eyes.
Eagle had lost his keys, and after a frantic five minutes of searching, declared that if Alex found the keys he could drive.
Alex had rolled his eyes, walked to the garage, and looked at the key hook, that was on the wall.
Eagle had swore, and reluctantly let Alex drive, believe that he would die in a car crash that very night.
At first he had covered his eyes, and prayed to a god that he had never prayed to unless to shout out 'Jesus Christ!' when he was shot at on the field.
Then, he had childishly peeked through his fingers to look at Alex, who was driving the car calmly, professionally, and even better than Eagle himself could drive.
"My uncle taught me how to drive when I was around twelve." He answered Eagle's unasked question.
Finally, they pulled up at the restaurant.
Alex turned to Eagle. "Alright, what's our cover story?"
"Cover story?"
Alex rolled his eyes once again. Really. It was becoming a reflex when he was around Eagle.
"Well, we can't just go bursting in there without a good reason!"
The man across from him nodded slowly. He was getting it… he thought…
Alex tried to resist rolling his eyes, but couldn't help it. "Alright. If anyone asks, you're my uncle who's treating me to a good dinner because you're old fashioned and I came out on top of my class. Alright?"
Eagle nodded slowly.
This time, Alex managed to keep his eyes still. "All right. We're going in."
They walked into the restaurant. There was a woman who led them to a table. They sat down and ordered their drinks. A coke for Alex, and just water for Eagle, who would've ordered a beer, but he had realized that he was on a "mission" and couldn't drink. His soldier persona was coming through.
When their menus came, Eagle told his 'nephew', "Don't order anything too expensive. I'm not made of money!"
Alex just chuckled and ordered some parmesan chicken. Eagle ordered a steak. They sat, eating quietly, looking around for signs of Jack.
"There!" Alex exclaimed nodding his head to a table not far off.
There sat Jack, in the inappropriate dress, laughing at what the man across from her was saying.
They both studied the man. Both of them instantly disliked what they saw. Alex saw an arrogant man, who was probably a manager of some random company that no one had ever heard of. The man was moderately handsome, and had the beginnings of a beer belly. He looked like he was moderately wealthy, and probably just wanted a trophy girlfriend.
Eagle thought he looked like a bastard. That was the extent of his body language identification.
The waiter walked over to where Jack was sitting, and handed them the check.
"Damn." Alex said. "It's too early for the date to be over, we have to leave, and follow them to their next place.
Alex quickly paid for the meal using Eagle's credit card, and forging his signature. While Eagle was still whining about not getting dessert.
They jumped out to the car, and Alex focused on following the car. Occasionally shouting out things like "Eagle, keep an eye on them! I need to give the driver who cut me off the middle finger!"
Eventually, they made it to a club.
A very busy club, called Lunar Eclipse that was full of people.
In other words, Alex and co. were screwed.
Alex somehow got in with no difficulty. Eagle was nearly dying with the apprehension, as he thought that Alex would get caught.
But Alex just flashed a fake ID, and when the bouncer asked what the matter with his 'friend' was, Alex just lied coolly "He was in a long term relationship for a while…he hasn't been in the dating scene for a while."
Once inside the club, Alex instantly started looking for his housekeeper, while Eagle decided to enjoy himself, and ordered a vodka with cranberry juice. He had realized that he wasn't going to be driving the car anytime soon…
Meanwhile, Alex had spotted Jack, dancing on the dance floor with her date.
He elbowed Eagle, who was enjoying his alcoholic drink, and hissed "Fire Girl and Rich Dude, 3 o'clock."
"Who what now where?" The older man asked, slightly confused.
Alex rolled his eyes. "Jack and her date to your right."
Eagle looked to his left.
The boy accompanying him groaned. "Your other right."
"Oh!" He looked in the right direction, and saw Jack leaving in the direction of the restrooms, and her date going up to the bar.
"Here's our chance." Alex whispered, and calmly walked over to where the man was sitting.
"What? Hey! Alex! Wait!" The man caught up to Alex. "Just what are we going to do?"
"We are going to start talking about hot girls, and see how he reacts. If he reacts in a 'No way! I'm on a date!' way, we don't kill him. On the other hand, if he seems interested in the girls we point out, we wait for him to drive Jack home, then we call, telling her that we're running late from the football game we were supposed to be going to because of traffic, we tail him back to his house, and give him hell. Got it?"
Eagle nodded. "Operation Protect Jack By Seeing What Her Date Is Like begins now."
Noticing Alex's odd look, he added. "Snake usually comes up with the mission names…"
They arrived to where The Date was sitting.
Cub and Eagle sat down and started looking around. Suddenly, Alex nudged The Date.
"Hey" he said. "That blonde over there seems interested in you… You should go talk to her…"
The Date looked over at the blonde, who was, in actuality looking in his direction (actually, the blonde was quite interested in Eagle, but The Date was vain enough to think she was looking at him). He sighed sadly. "I wish. I'm on a date. A hot redhead. I'm hoping we'll get to second base tonight…"
Eagle clenched his hands into fists at the sound of that, but he refrained from punching the guts out of the man, thinking that if Jack came back from the bathroom at that moment, she would do worse to him.
Alex, on the other hand, just steamed inside, and showed no negative emotion. Instead he said. "Well, you can still give her your number, maybe if things don't work out for you and Red…"
The Date nodded, a smirk spreading across his face. "You're right. If she doesn't put out, I'll just call that girl up. Good idea. I have to give her my number quickly though, my date will be back any second."
Eagle was now choking the air underneath the bar counter, while Alex still showed no emotion, except an encouraging smile.
"Go on."
The Date went, and finally Alex showed some of the raging anger inside him. "That bastard!" He growled, so low that Eagle could barely hear him.
The Date successfully gave the blonde his number, and got hers before Jack came back from the restroom. He thanked Alex, who said "Don't mention it."
And then the teen and Eagle walked out of the club.
The second they got into the car, they quickly drove back to the house, and parked around the corner.
In about thirty minutes, they saw Jack and The Date pull up at the house.
Jack went out of the car, and they scowled when they saw The Date get out as well. Eagle was actually praying that he wouldn't go inside, while Alex thought that if The Date went inside, he might actually have a little target practice…
Thankfully, Jack told him something, and Alex smirked. The Date looked disappointed, but kissed Jack (at this time Eagle crumpled the empty can of soda that he had just drunk, while Alex just sent out a murderous glare that probably should've killed The Date on the spot… sadly, it didn't), and got back into the car, and drove off. Instantly, Alex turned the key in the ignition, and shot after him, always staying a few cars back.
"What do you think Jack said?" Eagle asked the teen.
"She said, 'Well, I'm really tired. I'll call you tomorrow, goodnight!'" Alex said triumphantly.
"How do you know?"
"MI6 made me learn to lip-read."
"Really?"
Alex nodded.
"That's so cool!" Eagle kept enthusing about the awesomeness of lip-reading while Alex tailed The Date.
Soon, The Date pulled up at a house.
"Whoah." Both teen and man said.
It was a huge white manor, with a balcony, and a large fancy French door.
Alex shook himself out of his house admiration phase, and parked a bit down the street.
They waited for a few minutes before walking up the long driveway, and going to the door. Alex looked at Eagle, who nodded, and then knocked on the door.
The Date opened it, and saw them, and instead of being suspicious, suddenly burst out 'Hey! You're the guys from the club! Come in! Come in!"
Eagle was making no attempt to mask his awe at the house, while Alex didn't let anything show.
"Nice place you got here." Alex commented.
"Yeah, it is nice isn't it?" The Date arrogantly exclaimed. "I bought most of this stuff when I was drunker then I am now, but I hired some interior decorators to fix it up. They did a great job!"
Alex nodded. So the man was drunk. That would explain why he hadn't asked them how they knew where he lived.
On the other hand, he had driven Jack home, which made the two of them even angrier at The Date.
Meanwhile, The Date was still talking. "So the Redhead, whatever her name is was 'tired', so I didn't get any relief, so I called the blonde up. She'll be here in an hour. Thanks for hooking me up."
Eagle caught Alex's eye, and nodded.
Alex opened his mouth to speak, but Eagle beat him to it. "See, that's what we wanted to talk to you about. I'm 'the Redhead's' brother. And I'm kind of hoping to beat you up by the end of this hour."
The boy sitting next to him had a sudden urge to bang his head against the table. Could Eagle have been any more blunt?
The Date paled. "W-What's the other guy doing here then?"
Alex smiled sinisterly. "Well, you see, 'The Redhead' is my guardian, and I was kind of hoping to hurt you very much after 'the brother' is done with you."
The Date paled even more. "C-Can't you not beat me up?"
Alex put on a mockingly thoughtful face. "Weeeeell," He drawled. "I suppose we could, but we'd need something in return…"
"Please! I'll give you anything!"
Alex smirked. "For starters, break up with 'the Redhead', and tell her you were cheating on her. Then, we need one thousand dollars. Each."
Eagle looked at Alex, confused. He thought that they were going to beat the guy up! Where was the fun in negotiating? And then, a thought came to him. "And, you have to give us that laptop." He said, pointing to a brand-new touch screen laptop. The kind that Eagle had wanted for so long, but couldn't afford.
"B-B-But…" The man's voice faded away when he saw Alex cracking his knuckles. "Fine."
Fifteen minutes later, Eagle and Alex were leaving the manor with one thousand dollars (in cash) each, and the man commonly referred to as an animal couldn't be happier, with the laptop case in his arms.
"That turned out well, don't you think?!" Said the man enthusiastically, practically skipping along.
Alex sighed. "Yes. But soon, there will be another Date, who will also be in need of tailing." He suddenly had a strange glint in his eye. "I'll have enough money for university within weeks!" (1)
Man and boy laughed, as they walked to the car.
So far the night had gone great.
If Jack didn't find out what they were really doing, the night would've been great.
But all the two could do was cross their fingers and hope.
(1): In the US, university tuition costs a lot, I'm not sure how it is in the UK...
AN:
Soo… what do you think? Personally, I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. I had quite a few blocks along the way, but it was all very fun. :) Please comment and tell me what you think should happen next. Oh, and I have a question for you all...:
If you had to read a story about Alex, would you rather read about him on his missions, or trying to behave normally... When we all know that someone as insanely hot and talented as him can never be normal...?
Please please please please give me some ideas,
Marie AKA: the Guilty Author Who Should Be Cast Into The Iron Maiden For Not Updating Sooner
