AW YES, BRING ON THE SCOUT!


Chapter Seven – Gels

~TEST CHAMBER THE SEVENTH~

Jumpy as always, Scout had immediately sprung to his feet upon regaining consciousness, only to be clonked upside the head by something and flop back down. Grumbling, the young merc clambered into a slouched sitting position.

"Wait- where…?" This ain't the base. "Okay, this does NOT look good here. Uh…"

Scout stood, already freaking out, and several scenarios darted through his inattentive mind. He cycled through BLU kidnapping, sleepwalking and 'a wizard did it' before simply forgetting the situation when he found the portal gun.

The merc zipped over to it in curiosity, and tossing caution into the shredder, he scooped it up. He reckoned it was about the size of his scattergun and made the connection the thing must be a weapon.

With that so-called realisation came a desire to shoot something, so Scout gave the room a quick scan to confirm he was alone before doing as such.

Blip, went the blue portal.

"What the Hell? AWESOME!" The excitable RED dashed to the swirly circle on the wall and, in the same manner he tended to bother Spy or Heavy, he prodded it repeatedly. In the hope of making the science-y thing do something cool, Scout fired the portal gun again, this time on the opposite wall.

The speedster blinked as both portals split open, but the confused expression soon transformed into a demonic grin. Long story short;

"WHOO!" Scout had a portal on the roof and floor, "Imma freakin' blur here!" After falling a while he eventually clumsily double jumped to break the loop.

That motion was what really began the test; he managed to headbutt a small red button atop a pedestal. For the first time since waking Scout gave the room a proper look, to see a peculiar orange substance splatter from a pipe onto a ramp and run down it.

Beyond the slope a gap further than he could jump yawned in the tiles, but that wasn't really striking Scout's interest.

A little wary for once, he crept hesitantly to the ramp, eyeing the strange orange stuff as he would a Heavy who looked like he was hibernating but could very well punch him dead when he blinked.

Scout tentatively raised a foot.

Moved it forward.

Lowered it.

And finally planted it.

"OH JEEZ." The RED suddenly slid forward at crocket-speed, panels blurring by in a smear of dull white as he shot up the ramp. "Hey, I'm flyin'!" he said, moments before crashing to the floor on the other side of the pit, skidding to an abrupt halt.

Scout casually cleared his throat, muttering 'no one saw that…'

He jackknifed up because it's simply the coolest, most awesome way to get up. Now, while he couldn't nail down exactly what that… gel, was, the merc decided he wanted to do that again. Problem being he couldn't jump back to the ramp from here, and he didn't have the presence of mind to use the portal gun.

Shrugging in half hearted disappointment, Scout merely jogged out a second door across the room. To his childish delight there was more gel in this chamber, although it was sky blue.

And real far down; Scout stood on a short metal balcony above a distant splash of gel. The merc smiled- waiting's for losers!

Thinking about thinking about nothing while trying to think about nothing, he launched himself off the platform to play with the fun speedy-gel.

Shame it wasn't propulsion gel then.

"YEAH!" Scout hit the bouncy repulsion gel and flew upward again, "this is even better!"

Sure, in the next second he faceplanted on another balcony, but he had a new favourite thing. Ignoring the blood from his probably broken nose he scampered through the next door.

MORE GEL. Yaaay.

Apparently he had to work for it though, because there were those pipes and buttons again, and they weren't even in the right place! That's about when Scout remembered the portal gun.

If he applied a little brainpower (emphasis on 'little'; he didn't have much to spare) the RED could maybe get through this without further breaking things. Such as his bones. Hm.

First thing he noticed was another ramp, dead ahead. Past that was something of an island, surrounded by an empty moat. Beyond that waited a door.

Scout reckoned getting orange gel on the ramp would be a good start, so he trotted under the two pipes to see which was which. He stood under the nearest one and leaned back to look at it, when he accidently hit the nearby button.

The young merc barely had time to mutter 'aw crap' before he was doused in a shower of blue gel. With a dignified wee yelp Scout bolted in a random direction, bounced dramatically off a wall and landed on his backside.

However he did find something on the floor- a stray, yellowing sheet of paper. Scout casually shook the worst of the gel from his arm and retrieved the paper. There wasn't much on it; just a short paragraph entitled 'The Labboys' Notes' and doodle of a schematic in the corner. It seemed to be depicting some kind of lemon.

Scout ignored that and read the sheet, squinting as blue clouded his vision.

"Okay, uh, 'In case you got covered in that' – whatsthatsay? – 'repulsion gel, here's some advice: Do NOT get covered in the repulsion gel.' Damn."

Well, what's the worst that could happen anyhow? Scout skipped haters gonna hate style to the other pipe and placed his portal underneath. He spun to face the wall and set his other one, then pressed the button.

Arching like a pwetty rainbow, orange gel sailed through the air and coated the ramp within moments.

Taking a second to perform a short victory jig, Scout proceeded to figure out a way across to the door. Or he tried to; he was actually having more fun skating back and forth on the propulsion gel.

Eventually he grew bored of that too, and after much (so very, very much) trial and error the RED finally got some blue gel on the 'island'.

WARNING. Badass moment(ish) approaching!

Scout sprinted at the slope, aiming true for the distant door. The gel immensely increased his already hyped speed and he flew off the ramp, dog tags flying.

Half a beat later he hit the puddle of repulsion gel – feet first this time – and he jumped like that time he borrowed Soldier's rocket launcher.

Any vague levels of badassery faded when Scout slammed into the doorframe and slumped to the chilly floor.

"Wow. That was almost impressive," GLaDOS commented, totally not scaring the RED, "Shame you're such a moron."

Scout flounced upright indignantly, acting like nothing happened. He pouted severely;

"Hey, hey, moron? Come say that to my face, chucklehead!" There was a pause, then GLaDOS deadpanned;

"No."

Scout guffawed and stomped in a moody little circle, chucking the portal gun away in irritation. The device sailed through the door and hit something with a soft thump. Something that let out a groan.

"…Medic?" Scout asked dubiously, but the door clanked shut before he could find out. GLaDOS opted to go for the ol' distract the moron tactic and played the booming sound of a train horn. Scout jumped about eight feet.

"That was interesting. Do you have a guilty conscience?"

"For the last time that wasn't my fault!" Scout yelled, "I didn't know the microwave would implode! STOP JUDGING ME!"

GLaDOS quickly sent the hyperventilating merc out of his misery and back to respawn.


Playing king of the hill as Scout last night. Four kills in a row. Feeling awesome.

Jumped into - JUMPED INTO - a crit rocket. DEAD.

Argh.

Thanks for reading and reviewing guys! :D