7. Black Sheep
Jacob was packing. Man-style. It involved chucking everything in his laundry hamper into a rucksack and hoping that there was some underwear in there. For some reason he felt that his normal practice of going commando everywhere wasn't appropriate on a visit to see far away family members. He was only going for two days though. He could probably live without underwear if he needed to.
Leah had raced off to get her own things. She'd barely needed to think over whether she was coming, although she did point out that Jacob needed to put some faeces in his eyeball seeing as he was voluntarily accepting more favours from leeches.
Turns out, there was a lot of shit Jacob would put up with for a free holiday.
Billy was watching him as he grabbed food from the kitchen. Who knew what would be on the plane? Jacob decided snacks were even more important than clothing.
Billy cleared his throat. "Son, I just want to make sure I've got this right. You're going to Hawaii".
"Yep," Jacob answered.
"With the Cullens."
"Just the two lady-vamps. We're hitching a ride because they have private planes organised. One from Forks to Seattle and one from Seattle to Oahu," Jacob corrected him. "We're not vacationing with them or anything, and we'll be back in time for our next scheduled patrol."
"I see," Billy responded. "Leah's going with you?"
"Yep."
"I see," Billy said again, "I'll call Becca and let her know to expect you." That was that. Jacob had found precious little in recent weeks to be grateful for, but he found himself thanking the spirits for Billy's non-discursive nature.
He knew it was crazy. It was ludicrous, but he missed his sister – the one that didn't know about werewolves and vampires and wasn't banging Paul – and as soon as the idea of going to her had flitted across his mind, it had been a done deal. That and the idea of proving to Leah that they weren't stuck on the rez. They could get out every now and then. She needed a break and he was going to make sure she got one. Wolf and man were in firm agreement that this was a good plan.
Leah picked him up and they speeded so they could reach the Cullen House in time. As soon as they got there, they agreed quite quickly with Blondie and the Pixie that Leah and Jacob should drive separately to Forks Municipal – why endure the stink for any longer than they had to? The first flight wasn't so bad. Leah convinced him to try the breathing techniques they had practiced earlier in the day and it did help to calm them. It didn't change the pervasive odour, although it allowed Jacob to drift away from it inside his mind. The real challenge was the overnight flight from Seattle. Six plus hours with just him, Leah and two bloodsuckers in a cabin that was the size of his bedroom.
Jacob kept telling himself that the ends justified the means. He briefly thought about asking if he and Leah could go and sit in the cockpit with the pilot, but a quick look told him that even one of them would be too large for that and he didn't think the Cullens would be too keen to relocate there themselves, even though Pixie was so small Jacob felt confident that he could easily fold her into a piece of carry-on luggage. Jacob had some enjoyable fantasies about kicking them both out of the plane and watching them fly out into the clouds, but he needed them to get back home on Tuesday night so he would have to make do. At least Edward the mind reader wasn't there to tattle on him for his homicidal musings.
Jacob and Leah positioned themselves as far away from Alice and Rosalie as they possibly could, leaving half a dozen empty seats in the cabin between them. Once again, Jacob found himself drawing closer to Leah. His wolf didn't like her being so near to their natural enemies, even if they were ones they had a treaty with. The four of them sat in uncomfortable silence. Jacob knew it would be polite to make some sort of small talk, but he decided that although it was important to him to be a good person, it wasn't important to be polite. Unfortunately, the Pixie Cullen didn't seem to share his views.
"So, aah... your sister lives in Oahu?" Pixie enquired.
Jacob paused. Were they really going to do this? He snuck a glance at Leah and she shrugged at him. She seemed to be saying: this was your idea, Black. You make it work.
"Um, yeah. On the North Shore. She married a surfer she met on a trip to California right after she graduated from High School. She eloped and moved to Hawaii to be with him. I only met him once and she's never been back to the rez since."
"How romantic! You must be so excited to see her!" Alice squealed.
Jacob frowned. He didn't really think it was romantic at all. He had never understood how people could claim that they had instantly fallen in love with someone, whether by imprinting or some other force. He believed in knowing a person - inside and out – before declaring love. Insta-love was just lust. He would have said that imprinting was the same if it wasn't for Quil. He secretly thought that Rebecca had been motivated by something entirely different when she met Solomon.
She'd wanted out of the rez.
The death of Jacob's mother, combined with Billy's health issues had left a heaving caring burden to be shouldered. Rebecca and Rachel were four years older than Jacob. Their departure almost three years ago had left him carrying the load. At first he hadn't minded. He had been fourteen and accepted that his sisters had not only looked after Billy, but helped raise him. He wanted a chance to do his part. At the time he hadn't thought it would be forever. He'd expected that they would come back when they finished college and then he'd be ready to go. As it happened, Rachel had done exactly that. Not because she was worried about her younger brother, but because of Paul. To be fair to Rachel, she did come back most holidays and at semester break. Jacob couldn't say with certainty she'd been planning on doing a runner. However, after three years of Rebecca dodging invitations and making excuses, he knew the truth.
She was never coming back.
Jacob didn't know what to make of it. On the one hand he loved Rebecca. Nobody could ever understand you like a sibling could. On the other hand, what kind of person just deserted their family like that? Jacob felt rejected. Rebecca had abandoned him.
Lost in his thoughts, Jacob failed to realise that Alice was expecting some sort of reply. Leah jumped in. "Becca's a selfish princess, but we love her and miss her because we've known her forever."
Alice raised her eyebrow, no doubt expecting an angry retort from Jacob, but he wasn't worried by Leah's assessment. Leah had been particularly hurt that neither Rachel nor Rebecca had come back for Harry's funeral. Rachel had at least called and sent flowers. Rebecca never contacted the Clearwater family at all. He had seen via the pack mind just how hurt Leah had been by that. He knew that Leah cared about Rebecca and he didn't feel the need to reprimand her for speaking the truth.
"What's wrong with Rebecca?" Rosalie asked.
"She's wired funny," Leah replied. "For me family always comes first. For Rebecca, Rebecca comes first."
Rosalie nodded in understanding.
"She's lots of fun though," Jacob interjected, feeling the need to extol some of Rebecca's virtues. "She's always been the wild one... and she's creative. She makes jewellery and paints... Hey Lee, maybe you could go and do some girl things with her. Shopping or something."
"Girl things?" Leah asked incredulously.
Jacob felt uncomfortable. He was, after all, trying to describe activities he knew nothing about.
"You said you wanted to change your haircut... right?"
The Pixie suddenly became incredibly interested in the conversation. "What a great idea! You have such a good bone structure. So many different styles would suit you." She began flipping through a stack of magazines that she and Blondie had brought with them on the plane. "I saw one earlier that would be perfect."
Leah glared at him and Jacob groaned. This was going all wrong. The pixie found the picture she had been looking for, tore it out and folded it carefully into a paper aeroplane which she threw towards Leah with alarming precision. It was only due to Leah's own supernatural abilities that she managed to grab it from right in front of her nose. She stuffed it in her pocked without even looking at it.
"Thanks," she mumbled resentfully.
Jacob decided to quit while he was ahead and get some sleep. He closed his eyes and fidgeted uncomfortably. He just couldn't get past the stench. How had he ever managed to share that tent with Edward and Bella? His gut wrenched at the memory: Bella's small body snuggled against him, his face buried in her hair.
Oh yeah. That's how.
He tried lifting his shirt up above his nose and creating his own air pocket. It made things better. Leah looked at him with scorn. "You look like one of those people who's crazy afraid of bird flu, but too cheap to buy an oxygen mask," she ribbed.
"It's not the cost," he retorted. "I only do MJ impersonations on the dance floor where people can appreciate the full extent of my moon-walking."
"Uh, huh," she said disbelievingly. "We both know you're more like an extra from the thriller clip, but whatever helps you sleep... speaking of which," she rustled in her bag before triumphantly pulling out two oversized bulldog clips, clipping one to her nose and offering the other to him. "I plan ahead," she said proudly, in an odd nasal tone.
Jacob shook his head as he accepted the clip and pegged it on. It was tight, but he preferred the discomfort to the stench that riled at his wolf. Leah was bat shit crazy, but she was clever.
Jacob soon found himself drifting into unconsciousness. He dreamed he was inside a church bell tower. It was tall and imposing and he wasn't big enough to peek through the open windows above his head. The bells were clanging and the noise jarred. Then they began to talk.
"Calm down. What did you see?" One bell said to the other.
"Same as before! Esme crying, except this time Bella was there crying too... and she was unchanged," the other bell replied in a higher tone.
Then the walls began to speak. The sound was oddly familiar, although it had a strange muted quality. "What do you mean unchanged... as in still human?"
"Yes... but I can't see her at all right now... it's so confusing," the soprano bell chimed.
"Can you see her as one of you at all still... if you crystal-ball well into the future...?" The walls prompted her, full of agitation.
The bells were silent, as if deep in thought.
"Yes... eventually. That part hasn't changed."
"Then we say nothing to Jacob," the walls said firmly. "We are not dragging him back into this bullshit."
"Won't he just see it in your head anyway?" The lower-toned bell asked.
"Not if I can help it," the walls answered.
Jacob slipped into a deeper sleep, and in the morning he remembered nothing of the bells talking about his Bells.
~~BaB~~
Jacob awoke with a jolt as the plane landed.
"About time Black, my legs are going numb!" Leah snapped.
Jacob realised with embarrassment that he was sprawled over her lap. He quickly righted himself. "Sorry," he mumbled, wiping the sleep from his eyes.
"Forget it," she said dismissively. "Besides, you're missing the morning fashionista display."
Jacob looked up to see that Pixie and Blondie had changed outfits and were both completely covered. Boots, long pants, long sleeve silk shirts, leather gloves and wide brim hats with lace that flowed down covering their faces.
"They look like bee-keepers," he whispered.
"Couture bee-keepers on their way to a horse-racing carnival," Leah agreed.
"Spoken by the two trendsetters who each wore an item of stationary for the last five hours," Blondie sneered.
"It was meant to be cloudy for the whole trip, but it looks like we've got a bit of sun this morning. We came prepared though and the weather will definitely be bad later today and tomorrow," the Pixie said gleefully.
Jacob rolled his eyes. Vampires made everything topsy-turvy. Who got excited about poor weather in a place like Hawaii? They said a hasty goodbye at the airport lounge, confirming the time they had to meet back there the next evening and then rushed as fast as they could in opposite directions.
Jacob let out a long sigh of relief as they sat in the taxi making its way to Rebecca's house. Leah was peering enthusiastically out the window and Jacob found himself enjoying watching her more than anything else.
He couldn't remember the last time he had seen Leah Clearwater excited.
"We're in Hawaii," she kept repeating, as if she couldn't quite believe it. Jacob grinned and his wolf felt smug. She was still mumbling it to herself as they pulled into Rebecca's driveway.
Rebecca came tearing out the front door while Jacob was still speaking to the taxi driver. She was the mirror image of Rachel but with shorter hair and darker skin that showed she spent much of her time in the sun.
"Leah! Dad said someone was coming with Jake but I didn't realise it was you... you're so tall!" Jacob watched as the two girls hugged and Rebecca jumped up and down enthusiastically. "So where's my little bro-" Rebecca stopped mid sentence and stared at Jacob who had stood up to his full height as the cab drove away.
For a moment he wondered if he had something stuck in his teeth. Then he realised - he was nothing like what Rebecca had expected. She remembered a fourteen hear old gangly boy. Not a grown man who looked like a body builder.
"Jake," she whispered disbelievingly. "Jake, is that you?"
"In the flesh," he smiled, doing a small bow. Leah snorted.
"What...how... you're..." Rebecca stumbled for words.
"Growth spurt," he said as if that explained everything. He pulled Rebecca into a tight hug. She hugged him tentatively back.
Jacob felt a twinge of irritation. She was acting like he was a stranger. Rachel had also freaked out when she first came back from college, but it hadn't troubled him in the same way. Maybe because he had seen her just months before and she was rightfully shocked that someone could grow more than six inches in that time. It was different with Rebecca. She hadn't seen him in so long, for all she knew he'd been like this for years. Even if he wasn't a wolf, he'd probably have looked disconcertingly different. He felt a slight tremor in his shoulders.
Jacob looked over to see Leah frowning at Rebecca. "Just keep breathing," she mouthed at him.
Jacob inhaled deeply as he released a clearly troubled Rebecca.
"Seth's the same," Leah said encouragingly, her face not matching her words. "Shot up like a rocket recently. It's a boy thing."
Jacob exhaled. Why was he so angry?
Rebecca apologetically informed them that she had to go to a nursing course that she had enrolled in, and that Sol was at work, but that they were both hoping to spend the evening with them. Jacob focussed on drawing even breaths as Leah murmured soothing words. They'd given Rebecca less than twelve hours' notice of their arrival, of course they understood. Rebecca offered them her car if they dropped her off at school and Jacob tossed their bags with more force than was necessary in Rebecca's rusty old convertible so that she wouldn't be late. It was only when they drove away from Rebecca that he felt the tension ease in his chest. He'd wanted to see her so badly, but it physically hurt to realise that she didn't even recognise him.
"Selfish princess but we love her, remember?" Leah said softly. Jacob grunted in reply.
Less than an hour later, Jacob and Leah were sitting on beach towels at Waikiki.
"This place is insane," Leah commented, looking up at the long row of high-rise buildings that flanked the beach. Jacob agreed. He had never really been anywhere that wasn't half a day's drive from La Push unless he counted his recent trip to the wilds of Canada while on four legs. Now he was sitting in the sand surrounded by what seemed like sixty thousand other people outside the Hilton Hotel. To Jacob, who was used to often having First Beach all to himself, it was a little confronting. It was a good thing that the beach was wide. Maybe the weatherman had told all the others what Pixie vamp had told them. If you wanted to get a bit of sunshine anytime in the next few days, this morning was the only chance.
Leah was thumbing through the street directory from Rebecca's car and looking at a stack of pamphlets she'd pinched from the lobby of a nearby hotel. She was chatting animatedly about all the things they could try and see in the two full days they had before they had in Hawaii before they had to go home. She turned to him and gave him that smile, the one he'd seen on Friday morning when they were talking about Harry. Just like the time before, everything faded away as her deep brown eyes twinkled. It was the kind of smile that made you feel instantly buoyant and Jacob had needed the boost.
"I'm glad we came, Jake," she whispered. Jacob beamed at her. They'd proved something to themselves, just by the very act of getting on that plane. They were still human, they could still make choices. It wouldn't always be doom and gloom.
All the things that made them suffer were still waiting for them back home. Jacob was under no illusions about that, but they seemed to have both agreed without ever discussing it that this was a time out. A chance to be normal. The sound of ecstatic vacationers buzzed all around them. Children making sandcastles, people laughing as they jumped up and down in the surf.
And it was contagious. He knew that even if all they did was sit on this beach for the whole day, Leah would be having fun.
Jacob's heart swelled with pride. Making people happy had always been a huge part of who he was. He hadn't achieved it in a long time, and now that he had, he realised just how happy it made him, and it was compounded by the fact that it was Leah Clearwater who he seemed to have helped.
"Wanna go for a swim?" he asked. The waves were calling to him.
"Nah, she replied. I'm going to have a power nap. Some gigantic oaf was sitting next to me on the plane, literally cramping my style, and I need to recharge," she snarked.
"Right," Jacob said, knowing for once that she wasn't actually angry. "Well that sounds unfortunate, you should really make a complaint to the airline about their lax customer service standards... perhaps ensure you get better seating arrangements for the return flight."
"I'll think on it," she replied playfully. Jacob trundled down to the shoreline. Just before he dove in, he heard Leah's final retort, spoken softly but easily perceived with his wolf senses: "Even when we're thousands of miles in the air, right above the pacific ocean, they can still hear you snoring in forks."
Jacob laughed as he dunked his head under the waves.
He splashed and paddled out past the gated swimming area. For a while he just floated on his back with his eyes closed, feeling the sun on his face. It was peaceful and he could have stayed that way for hours. It was only his stomach that told him that it was time to go back in. He was always, always hungry. As he swum to shore, he saw that Leah was awake and talking two three pale men who were gathered around her curiously. Jacob used his paranormal abilities to hone in on the conversation.
"Are you here for the show?" One of the men asked her.
"Show?" She responded bewilderedly.
"Yeah, you're obviously a model but we haven't seen you before. Our collection's part of the showcase. We were all just talking about how great your look is, who's your agent?" The group raked their eyes over Leah's red bikini appreciatively.
Jacob guffawed. Three fashion designers we're trying to pick Leah up – in a professional sense.
"Nah," Leah mumbled. Jacob could feel her embarrassment. I'm just here with my friend. She pointed to the ocean and at that point, Jacob emerged from the breakers. He grinned at Leah as he walked towards them. There was no way she could talk crap about the way she looked after this.
The three men turned to him and it seemed that the entire beach was giving him a stupefied look. Jacob had the urge to check his teeth again.
He jogged over to them and extended his hand. "Hi, I'm Jacob."
"H-H-Hi," one of the men stammered as they shook. Now that he was closer, Jacob could see just how trendy the three were. With their designer sunglasses and expensive looking bracelets they were male equivalents of Pixie Vamp, save for the small pot bellies on two of the three. The other was rake thin.
"You hungry?" Jacob asked Leah.
"Famished," she replied, tossing their towels into her backpack and pulling on a purple sundress.
They said awkward goodbyes to the fashion trio, after they were both given business cards and a barrage of compliments.
"Don't say it," she warned as they walked into the concrete jungle of resorts and shops.
"Say what?" Jacob feigned ignorance. Leah stuck her tongue out at him.
"Surely you're not referring to the complete strangers who just called you a goddess and asked you to model their clothes? Cos that would make a lesser man say something along the lines of 'I told you so'... lucky for you I'm not anywhere near that petty," Jacob teased.
"Yeah, lucky for me," Leah agreed dryly. "I think you were more their type than me."
"Whatever Lee," Jacob said dismissively. "They're the people who decide what beauty is."
Leah brushed his comments off, but he knew that she was pleased. She wouldn't have believed it from a friend. That was the sort of person she was. Only outsiders could make her see herself differently. Jacob knew it would take more than that one external compliment, but it was a start.
They ate at a small unassuming bar on the main drag. Leah insisted on paying, which Jacob appreciated. Billy had given him a small amount of cash right before they had left – Jacob had spent the last of his own money on the meal at Lucy's. This time she was the one who made sure they each had twice as much food as a human would normally order. Even when they were done, they sat nursing their drinks, watching the people that were passing them by on the busy strip as clouds gathered above them.
"See that guy there?" Leah said mischievously, pointing to a chubby man in his forties who was standing next to an extremely artificial blonde woman with large breasts that bulged out of her unflattering midriff top. "He's gay and he wants to leave his wife for his lover, but he's overwhelmed by the guilt and doesn't know how. He tells himself that this is their last trip together, but really he won't say anything... little does he know that last night she slept with the pool boy at their luxury accommodation."
"I see," Jacob replied, nodded his head with mock seriousness. "See that girl over there?" He asked, pointing towards a girl wearing a black dress with lots of piercings and tattoos. "She was a pageant queen, right up until last year. She killed her boyfriend after he didn't come to one of her shows and moved here and adopted a new persona. She's on the FBI's most wanted list."
They continued that way, making up sordid histories and futures for a dozen or so pedestrians before Jacob was overcome with a wicked idea. He waited until Leah picked a Hawaiian woman. "See that lady?" Leah asked, pointing towards a woman with three small children. "She seems so sweet and wholesome but she runs a prostitution ring. In the underworld they call her 'Momma'".
Jacob felt some of his coke fizz up his nose in anticipation of what he was about to do. "Leah," he gasped. "That's Solomon's auntie. She's family. How could you?"
Leah's eyes widened in horror. "Oh! No Jake, it's just a game, I didn't mean it really." Her cheeks reddened. Jacob made a disapproving "Tsk tsk" sound and bowed his head so that Leah wouldn't see the laughter in his eyes. He would tell her the truth... one day.
They were distracted by a man walking past them who took such a long look at Leah that he walked into Solomon's not-really auntie.
"Seriously Clearwater, you're like a hazard or something," Jacob quipped.
"Shut up!" She said, punching his shoulder. "It's a crowded beach. Everyone's looking at everyone. All the people we just used as story-fodder probably think we're into them... It doesn't mean anything."
"Bullshit Leah. The only thing stopping you from dating is you. And you know it. Why are you scared, huh? Grab a blond surfer and make an honest man out of him," Jacob prodded. He got a strange feeling in his stomach when he spoke the words and he wondered what that was all about. Maybe he'd eaten his meals too quickly.
"Jake," she said disapprovingly. "You know why I don't date. It's the same reason none of the unimprinted wolves do."
Jacob scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. He didn't date because Bella hadn't wanted him. "Clue me in."
Leah frowned at him. "Let's not do this now."
Jacob almost gave in, but the curiosity was unbearable. "No time like the present Leah... clearly there is some fundamental issue that I've apparently never considered..."
"What... you've never considered imprinting?"
"What about it?" Jacob enquired.
"What if I date some random guy and it actually goes well? We become serious. It's peachy. Then I imprint. Wham. Bam. I forget the guy I chose and treat him like garbage. He feels like shit and it's all my fault. I know that pain Jake. I'm not doing it to someone else."
Jacob stared at Leah. It was humbling to see that she cared enough about hurting a fictional person not to let herself get close to anyone. He'd never even thought about that with Bella. He'd felt sure it wouldn't happen. Then again, he'd been in love with her long before he phased. He'd never had the option of keeping himself at a distance.
"Leah... there are a lot of steps between meeting someone and having a serious relationship. Maybe you could still try... something?" Jacob felt strange about what he was suggesting and he wasn't at all surprised when Leah threw her fork at him. He caught it just in front of his eye.
"Jake, you do know that everyone on the Rez thinks I'm a gigantic slut who's banging the entire pack, right? How am I going to help myself by actually having a string of short term relationships?" Jacob frowned. He'd very much hoped when Seth and Embry had told him about those rumours that Leah was unaware of them. As usual, luck was not on her side. "Besides", she continued, "How am I supposed to have a relationship with anyone when my body temperature suggests I have cholera and I spend all my time running around naked in the forest with a bunch of guys? I'd be unreliable, and constantly lying to someone. That wouldn't make me happy."
Jacob realised that he'd stepped into a landmine. Leah had thought about this much more than he ever had. Unfortunately, Jacob was bound by another friendship, the most important one in his life, to make the other obvious suggestion. "What about Embry? You wouldn't have to lie with him, and he wouldn't hate you if you imprinted. He'd understand."
"I don't feel that way about Embry," she yelled, "and even if I did you're missing the obvious fucking point. He might imprint and I am done with that. I'm done until I imprint. It's not the way I want it, but that's how it is. This. Conversation. Is. Over." With that she pushed up out of her chair and stormed off down towards the beach.
Jacob ran after her. "Lee, I'm sorry," he called.
She ignored him. Never in his life had he felt he deserved it as much as he did now. He easily caught up to her. He was so unusually large that crowds always parted for him like the Red Sea. He began jogging backwards so that he could see her.
"Come on Lee, we're gonna try running meditation now, right? No time like the present."
"Fuck you, Black," she snarled.
He kept jogging. "Gonna be hard seeing as you're committed to life as a nun, Clearwater."
She probably would have slapped him if not for the fact that he was still jogging backwards and he crossed right into the road without even realising it.
"Jake!" Leah shrieked, reaching out to grab him before he was hit by a car. She pulled him out of the way and he wasted no time wrapping his arms around her.
"I'm sorry," he murmured over and over, hugging her on the side of the curb. He felt the tension ease from her limbs. His wolf told him she would forgive him.
She always forgave him.
"I didn't mean to upset you," he breathed into her ear, pulling her tighter.
She sighed and pulled away. "Let's not ruin an otherwise good day... okay? But no more matchmaking Jake. I mean it."
He didn't doubt it. He'd crossed a line somewhere. Touched a fragile nerve. He didn't want that to be what she remembered of their trip. They walked back towards the Hilton. One of Leah's pamphlets had said that you could walk from one end of the beaches at Waikiki to the other in ninety minutes. They were going to run there and back in less than that. They started by taking a hundred breaths. It seemed to work for them before. Then they ran along the shore in the hardened sand, just out of the reach of the waves. Jacob knew what he was supposed to do. He was supposed to think of his body and his surroundings, to focus on the things outside of him, rather than the things within.
It wasn't working very well.
Leah seemed to master it instantly. Her eyes glazed over and she set a demanding pace. Jacob followed after her. He didn't find it hard to keep up, but he found it hard not to notice... Leah. Maybe it was just because he knew he'd come dangerously close to her leaving him in the middle of the road, but he had kept looking over at her to make sure she was okay. Once he knew that she was, he just kept looking anyway... at her boobs.
He'd never gone running as a human with Leah before. So he'd never really noticed that she had a set of bouncing mountains attached to her chest.
It's okay, you're a guy, he told himself. It wasn't like he'd never snuck a peek before. Other than Seth, they all had. It had been one of the most disruptive things to ever happen to the pack. Not only was Sam's ex suddenly among them, but the nudity that they had had been annoying before was now...uncomfortable. They had all seen her and she had seen all of them. It was tit for tat. Nobody liked a girl seeing their tat. Sam was especially peeved. So they all worked hard not to look, except that sometimes, when Leah wasn't mouthing off, looking was sort of instinctual and unavoidable (as long as Sam or Seth didn't catch you doing it). It was these thoughts that kept Jacob occupied while he was running, and he gave himself a stern talking to.
Focus.
It must have worked. At some point his mind drifted off from less noble thoughts and found refuge. He felt the sand between his toes. He felt the warm air and the ominous storm clouds. At one point the sand faded out and he felt hot concrete under his toes as he bounded up a set of stairs and a walkway. He left behind the pain of Bella, the guilt of hurting Leah, the frustration that Rebecca didn't know him and worse that he felt so utterly distanced from her.
And he ran.
He felt his legs and arms. Felt the pain that still coursed in his neck but eased with each day. Heard his breathing. Everything was rhythmic. His body was on autopilot but at the same time it had never been more alert. A brief flicker of awareness flashed through him when they reached the end of the run and turned back around, but as soon as he did, he lapsed back into the steady thrum of their running. He was absorbed by the feel of his feet striking the ground. His heartbeat synchronised to his footfall.
When they were outside the Hilton again, he almost turned to repeat the process until Leah tugged at his arm.
"We did it," she squealed. "You totally looked like a robot! The lights are on but nobody's home."
Only Leah would be excited by that.
Satisfied that they'd completed their homework, and realising that it was only early afternoon, Leah ordered Jacob back to the car so that they could make a quick trip around the island before they picked Rebecca up from class. They did a loop, briefly stopping at various places with Leah narrating from the pamphlets and street directory. Volcanoes, beaches, it was all beautiful and amazing and he didn't really mind where they drove because she seemed so pleased by everything. It was a different Leah. One he'd never seen before. Whatever CD Rebecca had in the car, Leah declared track one the theme song of their trip and put it on endless repeat as they made their journey. Jacob asked her if she wanted to listen to the rest of the songs, seeing as she was so keen on the first one. She shook her head at him as if he were a little bit slow. She liked that one. They were listening to that one. Over and over. It was so catchy Jacob suspected he'd be singing it for days. Jacob knew that he would forever associate that song with Leah laughing, standing up in the convertible and raising her arms as high as she could and swaying them as she shouted to the world that she was free.
For a short while she was just Leah. Not a wolf or someone's ex girlfriend, but the girl with the wild heart. Jacob and his wolf purred in contentment, knowing that this was a rare glimpse into something more magical than shape-shifting or superpowers. He didn't want the drive to end.
By the time they picked up Rebecca, she seemed to have recovered from her initial shock and greeted them both with large hugs, although he caught the surprise as she took in Jacob's shirtless form (at least she had the sense this time not to say anything). "Sol's cooking," she told them. "The surf school closed a bit early once the weather turned."
Leah and Rebecca chatted agreeably in the drive back to the small house that she shared with her husband and Jacob was content to listen from the backseat. Now that the hurry of the morning had passed, Jacob was able to see what a lovely home it was. A blue structure on a block sloping upwards, nestled next to a patch of parkland, with a wrap around verandah. When he reached the top steps he could see that it offered panorama of the ocean. It was obvious why his artistic sister loved it here. It was cosy inside. The front room was a small lounge with two couches facing one another. Sol greeted them with a tea towel thrown lazily over his shoulder. Like Rebecca, his eyes shot up in surprise when he saw Jacob, although he remained friendly and extended his hand.
"Wow, you're hot," he exclaimed as they touched.
"Sol!" Rebecca exclaimed.
"No feel his skin. He's sick!" Solomon said hastily. "Leah too," he added as he clasped her palm.
Rebecca placed her hand on Jacob's brow. "Shit! He's right. We have to get you both to a doctor!"
Jacob gave Leah a helpless look. Their usual response – that everyone ran a little hotter on the rez – wasn't going to work on Rebecca.
"It's all the adrenalin from the sight-seeing," Leah interjected without missing a beat. "We're fine really." Rebecca and Solomon looked at them doubtfully but it was true that they both looked the picture of health.
"So where should I chuck my crap?" Leah added. Jacob winked at her, distracting them was a good idea.
"The spare room's in there, Leah. Jake can take the couch."
Jacob nodded agreeably although he knew that he would never sleep on that tiny thing. It didn't matter though. He could sleep on the floor. As if she was reading his mind, Leah shook her head at them. "Jake, you take the bed. You don't want to risk your neck," she warned him.
"What's wrong with his neck?" Rebecca asked.
"Nothing," Jacob and Leah said in unison.
"Just a cramp," Jacob added.
"Didn't you guys all grow up together?" Solomon piped up. "You're like family, right? Can't you just share?"
Jacob stared at Leah uncomfortably. He wasn't sure why that seemed like a weird solution. "I guess," he said uncertainly.
"Whatever," Leah said waving her hand. "Let's get this dinner on the road. I'm hungry."
Dinner passed uneventfully. Sol was actually a reasonable cook and as they ate, Jacob found himself loosening his grip on the anger that he had held in his heart for his sister. There was a large print in the lounge of the last family portrait taken before their mother died, and it mollified Jacob to know that she must at least look at it every day. She hadn't forgotten them. They were together now and she was sharing her life with them. More importantly, she was reminiscing with Leah about people they had known as children. Rebecca was a year and a half older than Leah, but they'd played together all their lives. The fact that she knew everything about their history, but nothing about their current woes, made her the perfect dinner companion. She had plenty to ask them about, but it didn't venture into weird supernatural dilemmas.
Until she asked that one obvious question that Jacob hadn't imagined that she would ask with him and Sol right there.
"So what happened with Sam, Leah? I thought that I'd be coming back for your wedding sometime soon and instead Rachel told me that you guys split and that he married your cousin. What's with that?"
Jacob gaped at Rebecca. Leah's lower lip trembled.
"Can it Becca, this is off limits," Jacob hissed.
"So you're not okay with it?" Rebecca demanded, ignoring Jacob and turning her body towards Leah. "Why were you a bridesmaid then? Are you nuts? Why would you do that to yourself? Didn't someone run the little tramp of the rez?"
Leah jumped up and he could see the muscles rippling under her flesh. He reached out to try and calm her, but she shrugged him off and ran for the back door. Rebecca and Solomon strained their necks watching her go before turning their attention back to Jacob. He could feel the exact moment that Leah reached the trees at the edge of the yard, yanked off her dress and phased. He wanted to run after her, but he knew that he needed to stay and make sure that Rebecca and Solomon didn't accidentally peek out their back door and sight a wolf the size of a horse.
"It's complicated," he informed them. He wasn't telling them anything more, that was Leah's decision.
"I'll go talk to her," Rebecca muttered.
"No," Jacob said firmly. "Let her be alone. She'll come back when she's ready. You pushed her too far." His tone was so authoritative that Rebecca and Solomon immediately agreed without questioning him.
They gathered in the lounge and played boggle until Sol began to yawn. He got up at dawn to catch the best waves and he turned in early, pressing a kiss to Rebecca's cheek and squeezing Jacob's shoulder. Then it was just Jacob and Rebecca.
And he didn't know what to say.
They waited in silence, playing round after round of the game. Eventually Rebecca caved.
"I really put my foot in it, but I don't understand why... she was a bridesmaid, there must be some level of acceptance..."
"Things aren't always what they seem Rebecca."
"You're both being very mysterious," Rebecca complained. "And absolutely nothing you guys say makes sense!"
Jacob shrugged. "It's difficult to provide years of history in one night. I'm not surprised it seems confusing, but the wedding was only two days ago. Have you stopped to think about why she might have needed a break from being on the Rez?"
Rebecca had the good sense to flush with embarrassment. "I didn't realise the wedding was that recent... what can I do?"
Jacob paused. What could she do? Probably nothing. If there was something that could be done he would have done it for Leah already himself. Then he remembered the conversation on the plane.
"Skip class tomorrow. Take her out. Get a haircut with her – she hates her hair- or whatever. Be a friend. Make her feel good about herself."
Rebecca thought about it. "I can miss the morning, but I'm graded on some of the work I have to do in the afternoon. What will you do?"
Jacob thought about it. Maybe he would just sleep and eat all morning. That would probably make it the best holiday ever. "I might wander down to the surf school to see Sol if you give me the address."
Rebecca seemed to think that was a fantastic idea. When Leah returned she gave her a soft brief apology before bidding them both goodnight.
He waited until they were both in pyjamas lying in the queen sized bed that could barely hold both of them before he spoke to her.
"You holding up, chica?" He murmured, turning on his side to face her and tucking a lock of hair behind her ear.
She nodded, staring at the ceiling. "Her reaction was the normal one you know. The indignant response that I always wanted all the people closest to me to have. The one I had. But Mom and Dad knew about the wolf stuff so they were always trying to get me to be more understanding. Seth hated Sam, but it wasn't enough...I wish Becca had been there to say that months ago..." She trailed off.
Jacob wished Becca had come back to the rez too. As much as he hated the way she ditched them, he would forgive it all if she made her way home.
"I'm sorry I didn't come around and say it... when you needed it." Jacob finally responded. He was more sorry for what had happened to Leah than he would ever know how to express.
"It's okay Jake," Leah said sleepily. "We weren't even close at the time... besides, I could never claim that you haven't done enough".
She was asleep before Jacob could ask her anything further, although his mind danced around her words, repeating them over and over for a long time.
~~~Bab~~~
Jacob stirred several hours later. The first rays of daylight were creeping through the window opposite him. His arms were wrapped tightly around Leah and her back was pressed up against him. He didn't have time to wonder how they had gotten like that, because he could hear Solomon speaking frantically to Rebecca in their room.
"Call animal control, call the police. We have to call someone. I just went out back and something...bigfoot or King Kong or a giant bear was here. There are enormous prints all over the back yard!"
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