So this is what happens when I can't make headway on my serious fanfics, you get another edition of a series of shorts I have on the go. Today's update is brought to you by the letter X for X-men.

Chapter 7: X-men #1

"Where did the tapes go?" Bobby yelled from his position with his head in the closet. "Lester, I can't see the box. Where'd you put it?"

Lester, in the kitchen section of his apartment where he was making popcorn, yelled back, "In my footlocker, the bossman was snooping around the closet last week so I had to move them."

Five minutes later they were seated on the couch in the readying for the viewing of their favourite set of tapes, New Employee Interview Day. Steph was supposed to be joining them, but they were impatient, as ever, to begin the fun, so they began arguing over the theme of the night.

"X-men," Lester suggested.

"We've done X-men to death," his counterpart replied.

"Are you kidding? That was exclusively the most recent X-men movie. This is free range of any medium; comic books, animated series, movies, whatever."

A sigh escaped him, but he finally conceded and they began. The television came to life with the initial scene of their Employee Interview Day compilation tape: the little used seminar room filled with the mottled crew that wished they were part of the awesomeness that was Rangeman.

The A-team plus Ranger were standing at parade rest in front of the assembled wannabes in the seminar room. Ranger was talking, most probably doing the standard introduction speech he'd been using since his second year. He gestured to each of the assembled men in turn stating their name and rank before the door opened and he gestured to Steph as she assumed the same position as the men.

"This, children," Lester voiced as Ranger continued to speak and gesture to Steph on the screen, "Is Kitty Pryde, who apparently feels the need to make a grand entrance."

Steph made a comment and Bobby filled in the missing dialogue. "I'm sorry, I was busy remembering to put on all my clothes." Bobby and Lester hi-fived at the good call and waited a short while as the tape played out.

One of the candidates raised their hand and asked a question in the middle of Ranger's speech and Bobby paused the tape, turning to his partner. "I really hated that guy. Such big words, is it too much to ask for people to use the word angry when they mean angry?"

"Probably in that guy's case," Steph panted as she plonked down between them having burst through the door just moments before. "Sorry I'm late guys; got held up by a stupid search."

"Don't sweat it. We made a crack about you in your absence, so all is well in the world. Now, back to the tape." Bobby unpaused the tape and Lester immediately jumped in when Ranger retaliated to the question. "Beast, the problem with you is that you are incapable of having a conversation with someone that doesn't use thirteen syllable words."

The guys laughed while Steph stared blankly trying to catch up. Eventually she turned a confused eye on Lester and demanded, "Theme."

"X-men."

A furrow creased her brow. "Did we already do that one?"

"No, that was the most recent movie, this is free range."

"Righto."

The tape skipped to a different view of the same room and the three couch potatoes observed a single male rise from his seat and start toward the door. He was a scrawny bloke, with wiry hair and thick glasses and he looked like he wanted to be invisible, a sure fire way to make sure the Merry Men took notice of you. Tank, who had the floor at the time, barked something at him and the geek guy turned and replied defiantly.

"Ther is no way I'm getting involved with a group," Lester filled, "That has the blob," geek guy gestured to Steph, "and those guys as members."

As Bobby laughed Steph crossed her arms over her chest. "I thought you said you already made a crack about me," she grumbled.

"Sorry, Beautiful, but he's the one that gestured not us."

With their attention back on the screen they were treated with a view of the individual interview room. Excited, Lester began jiggling on his cushion and slapping Steph's knee.

Ranger sat across from an incredibly muscled and tanned male who was evidently protesting shirts, as his chest was completely bare. He had crossed his arms over his chest as Ranger asked questions and seemed to be refusing to give up sufficient information, if Ranger's almost expression of frustration was anything to go by. Finally, he leaned across the table that bridged the gap between him and Shirtless. As he seethed something directly into Shirtless's face Steph spoke. "Talk to me, or I will do terrible things to you." A moment passed as the two men simply stared at eachother. "On purpose."

Hi-fives all round met that statement as they all knew it was definitely with in his character to do something like that. After Shirtless's clearly defiant retaliation Ranger abruptly stood and folded his arms over his bulky chest. "I'm the best at what I do kid," Steph continued to provide, "And what I do ain't nice."

The screen flickered and another interview room appeared, this time containing Steph and a stunning blonde with a considerable bust. Her attire said Malibu Barbie, which, in case you haven't guessed, is nowhere near Badass-Ass-Kicking-Skills chic. "I was just trying to understand you," Bobby voice overed in his best confused blonde voice.

"A beautiful girl like you would never understand," Lester replied, filling as Screen-Steph made a bored face and spoke.

Screen-Steph continued to ask a question and a thoughtful expression covered Blondie's face for a considerable amount of time. A prompt from Screen-Steph brought on a frown. "I'm trying to think," Bobby once again filled.

A sigh escaped the brunette and Lester provided the muttered words, "Don't hurt yourself."

Steph's phone sang out the Batman theme interrupting their viewing pleasure. The conversation was short, even by Ranger's standards. Before she even greeted him he told her to open the door and hung up. A short dash to the apartment door and she was pulled into an incredibly dirty, smelly hug. Ranger was home from a mission. Freshly home. After a moment they broke apart and Steph looked him up and down licking her lips. Ranger laughed.

Back in the living area, turned around on the couch so that they could watch the reunion, Lester and Bobby filled in the whispered words they could not hear with yet another quote from X-men.

"I'm sorry," Bobby began, "My mind must have been elsewhere."

"The gutter perhaps?" Lester replied as Ranger spoke.

Suddenly, Steph spun around, hands on hips. "You may not be able to hear us, but we can hear you," she told the boys. "We're gonna have to cut this session short, but we'll make up for it later, yeah?" Before waiting for a reply she was out the door and on her way up to the seventh floor apartment with the man she loved.


The beauty of this instalment is that there is at least one more part to it. Isn't that great? That means that if all goes well there is another update coming soon. Oh, and you wanna hear irony? I was halfway through writing this when I heard that X-men 2 is on TV tonight. Coinsidence?... Probably...

And I digress. So please review and remember that I'm always looking for new themes, so let me know what you wanna see in the future.