A change is gonna come

Chapter 7

JAG Headquarters

Friday afternoon

Harm walked into the conference room and found Mac behind stacks of books. She'd been a little down all day, and he suspected why and wanted to sheer her up a little.

"Chocolate muffin," he put it down in front of her.

"Thanks," she removed the wrapping right away and took a bite. "This is good."

"I know they're your favorite, and I thought it might sheer you up a little," he sat down on the chair beside her. "How's the McGuffey Court Martial coming?"

"It's a challenge, but I think we'll be prepared for opening statement on Monday. Bud's at Quantico talking to the leader of the SEAL team."

"It's going to be an interesting case to follow. It's hard to find a good defense against disobeying a direct order."

"We're focusing on the Lieutenants heroic acts. He did save three people from being killed, and we're arguing that his actions should mean more than his disobedience. But you're right, it's going to be a hard case to argue," she agreed.

They were quiet while Mac finished her muffin. Harm hoped that she would open up to him, but when she didn't say anything he decided to dive into it.

"How are you?"

She shrugged. "Okay."

"It didn't happen this month either, but these things can take time. Years even."

"Harm, I don't want to talk about this," she warned.

"I know you had your hopes up, since your period was late," he continued.

"Will you just back the hell off," she snapped and stood abruptly. "I'm going to wrap up for the night."

He stood as well. "Me too. I'll see you by the car in fifteen minutes?"

"Sure," she started gathering files.

Harm left the conference room, and headed for the elevators. He took the elevator to the right floor and found Sturgis waiting when the doors opened.

"Is she still in the conference room?" Sturgis asked as he stepped into the elevator, and Harm stepped out.

"Yeah, she's wrapping up for the night."

Sturgis held out his hand to stop the doors from closing. "Varese is in town this weekend, why don't you and Mac come over for dinner?"

Harm nodded. "Sure, sounds nice. But you should check with Mac, maybe she's got something else planned."

"I'll ask her now. I have to make sure she gets this deposition," Sturgis held up the file he had in his hand, as he let the doors shut.

Harm headed for his office, wondering how to get his wife to talk to him as he shut the computer off and packed his briefcase. He knew that the negative results every month was getting to her, and he understood. He just wanted her to open up to him. They hadn't been trying more than five months, and they both knew that it could be much longer than that before they succeeded.

The drive home was quiet, and when he suggested that they just order a pizza for dinner, she just shrugged. When they entered their apartment she excused herself to take a bath. He changed into sweats and picked up the phone to order pizza for them.

After twenty minutes the pizza arrived, and he put it on the living room table and went to tell his wife that dinner had arrived.

He found her in the bathtub, bubbles to her chin, and her eyes closed.

"That looks relaxing," he commented as he sat down on the tub.

"It is," she opened her eyes. "It's room for one more."

He smiled. "Tempting, but pizza arrived and I'm starving."

"I'll be done soon," she sat up slightly. "Will you hand me that towel?"

He stood and reached for the towel. "Here you go," he held it out to her.

She stood and got out of the tub, letting him wrap the towel around her. "Thanks."

He kissed her cheek. "I love you."

She smiled. "I love you too."

They had a quiet dinner in front of the TV. Mac only had two pieces, which was very unlike her.

"Not hungry?"

She shook her head. "Not really."

"Mac, you knew when we started this that it could take time," he reached out his hand and touched her cheek softly.

She moved away from his touch. "I think I'll head to bed," she stood.

"Mac, this is silly," he stood as well. "I know you want a baby..."

"Harm, can you just drop it," she said sharply.

"No, I won't," he stepped in front of her. "We're in this together, so don't shut me out. You want to go to bed, fine, but I'm coming with you."

She stared at him, "Did I say that you couldn't go to bed too?"

"No, but you are constantly pushing me away, and it's unacceptable," he moved to the side so that she could walk past him. "I know you had your period today and you're probably having some pain, so I'll arrange the heating pad."

She walked to the bedroom without saying a word.

He arranged the heating pad for her and joined her in the bedroom. She mumbled a thank you and put the pad over her stomach, before she continued reading her novel. He finished in the bathroom and joined her in bed. He took the book she was reading, which made her give him an annoyed look, and put it on the night stand, before putting his arms around her.

"Did I tell you about the time when I really wanted a new bike?"

The look went from annoyance to curious.

"I had an old bike that my Mom got from my cousin Tom. It was blue and a little rusty here and there. My friend Jim got this brand new bike, it was black and silver. The coolest bike ever. I asked my Mom if I could get one like his for my birthday, but they were expensive and we didn't have a lot of money back then, so she said no."

Mac reached for her novel again, but Harm took it from her just as quickly.

"Despite that my Mom said no, I still hoped she'd change her mind, but my birthday came and all I got was some new clothes. Then a year went by and on my next birthday my Mom woke me up early and brought me out to the garage. This was just after she'd married Frank by the way. Anyway, there it stood, a brand new bike, black and silver."

Mac turned her head to look at her husband. "Are you comparing a baby to a bike?"

He smiled. "All I'm saying is that there's always a chance that you'll get what you want. I found my dad after years of looking. I managed to get my eyes fixed so that I could go back to flying. Mac, we'll have our baby."

She snuggled into his arms. "That was a lame story."

He kissed the top of her head. "I thought it was rather good."

She chuckled. "You are something else."

He snuggled deeper into the covers and brought her with him. "I'm pretty good."

She smiled. "Thanks for the heating pad, it helped."

"There's nothing I wouldn't do for you," he looked into her eyes. "I promise you we'll have a baby."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I can feel it," he kissed her softly.

She closed her eyes and relaxed against him. "I don't."

"You will," he closed his own eyes. "Trust me."

"I do trust you," she mumbled.

"Good night."

"Night."

Sturgis apartment

Saturday night

They had just finished dinner and Sturgis and Varese had cleared the table and excused themselves to arrange dessert.

Harm reached for Mac's hand. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah, just fine," she reassured.

"Let me know if you want to cut the night short," he leaned in and kissed her softly.

"I'm fine, really."

Varese came back carrying a cake. "I hope you guys like cheesecake."

"Are you kidding, I love it," Mac said with a huge smile.

"She's not kidding. I've seen her eat one half by herself," Harm added.

"In that case we'll share the cake and let the men find something else to eat," Varese joked.

"Sounds good to me," Mac agreed.

Sturgis came to join them. "More wine, Harm?"

"Yeah, sure," he said.

Mac poured water for herself. "I forgot to thank you for the help with the McGuffey Court Martial, Sturgis."

"No problem, Mac. It's an interesting case, would have loved to argue it myself," Sturgis said as he sat down.

"Yeah, tell me about it," Harm agreed.

"Bud's been doing some great work on this one," Mac tasted the cake. "Yummy."

Harm chuckled. "How you don't weigh 300 pounds with your appetite for cake I don't know," he tasted the cake. "Wow, this is good. Can I have the recipe?"

"Sure," Varese smiled. "It's my Mom's recipe. She's an amazing cook. It's a wonder I don't weigh 300 pounds with a Mom like her."

"If you get the recipe you can make it for me all the time," Mac told her husband. "He makes the best chocolate chip cookies," she told Varese.

"And don't forget that home made ice cream he makes," Sturgis added.

"You never made that for me," Mac accused.

Harm laughed softly. "I'm sorry, I promise I'll make you some soon."

"Don't you love that he bakes?" Varese asked. "Sturgis barely cooks."

"Me neither," Mac admitted. "Harm's an amazing cook."

"I'm not that amazing, but someone has to make sure that you eat properly. She's on a first name basis with most of the owners of D.C's take out places," Harm smiled teasingly towards Mac.

"Not everyone, just Chong, oh and Jim. I love Jim's pizza."

"Do you mean Jim like in Jim's bakery and pizzeria?" Sturgis asked.

Mac nodded. "Yeah, don't you love that he makes pizza and he has a bakery?"

"Absolutely," Sturgis agreed.

They stayed for a few more hours before leaving Sturgis apartment with a cheesecake recipe.

On the drive back to their own apartment Mac reached for Harm's hand.

"Thanks for making me go out tonight," she smiled warmly. "And for making me feel better last night."

"Any time," he smiled. "I like Varese. Don't you?"

"Yeah, she's great," Mac agreed. "And she makes Sturgis very happy."

"I've never seen him so at ease and relaxed before," Harm admitted.

Mac nodded. "It's nice to see that he's happy."

They had to stop for a red light and Harm leaned in and kissed her. "I love you."

"I love you more," she kissed him again. "It's green."

To Be Continued...