Hmmm what is our tempermental heroine up to? Let's see shall we?

This is as much as I had scribbled in my notebook, it may be a day or so while I scribble more. And of cours, actually play the game ;)


Kasha knew she had to stop and rest. Her body ached, Lethallin was tired, and Shadow needed rest. She had pushed them all harder than she would have liked in effort to put as much distance between her and Alistair as possible. She wasn't a complete fool, she knew he'd come after her. But she was nowhere near ready to face him. Lothering wasn't far, but she knew the blight had hit it hard, and had no wish to see it just yet. That's when she remembered a clearing nearby. It should be just off the road. She dismounted and walked with Shadow until she found it. A small path that the average passerby would miss.

It led into a secluded clearing, that had been home for a time. Their first of many. It hadn't changed much, the grass was a bit taller, but the large fire pit was still there. How many nights on the road had they shared a large fire. Leliana singing quietly, Zev hitting on every female in sight, Wynne telling stories or sharing advice, Oghren fighting with Lethallin over his pants...that thought brought a smile to her face

"Warden! You saw it! That dog stole my pants!

"Oghren, you are wearing your pants"

"But he doesn't know that! I'll show him! I don't NEED my pants!"

"Oghren, you very much do need your pants"

"You hear that, Nughumper! I'm comin for ya!" Yelled the dwarf, just before he passed out.

She could picture the tents and where everyone had always been as she set to building a fire. She couldn't shake the feeling of being watched, followed. She could swear she heard voices. She did, and as they got near, she ducked behind a fallen tree while Lethallin grumbled. Lethallin knew the trick well. He would attack, and she'd spring from the shadows. But as the voices got even closer...he seemed to calm down. And then he took off. Blasted dog, what was he up to. She had her answer soon enough as he led the pair into the camp. One very large Qunari, traveling with a very familiar Golem.

Kasha stepped out into the light of the fire and smiled as they approached.

"Kadan...you should not be out here alone" Sten told her, with all the intensity she remembered.

"Yes. It should be with the other squishy human should it not? Listening to whining and bad jokes?" Said Shale.

Kasha smiled a little. Some things never change. Including being called "It" by Shale. Though she knew it wasn't an insult, not anymore. It had been once, but Shale had softened after some time together, after being treated as a being with a mind and soul instead of a slave.

"What are the two of you doing here? Kasha asked them.

"Looking for you." Sten replied, simple and direct as usual. He was not known for his lengthy answers.

Shale however continued to explain.

"Wynne got called away before we could get any answers in Tevinter about my...squishiness. I had nothing better to do at the time, So I searched for the Qunari people. I wished to learn about them. I found Sten, He arranged for me to stay in his village for a while. That's is where I was when I heard you were missing" She finished with a shudder.

"I've only been gone for a day and a half, how could you know so quickly, so far away? "

Shale shuddered again "A little bird told me" She sounded traumatized.

"A...bird? Like a carrier pigeon?"

"Oh why must you mention even more of the feathered fiends? No, it was the swamp witch. She turned into a flying nuisance and pestered me, threatening to do foul, FOUL things if I did not come at once." The poor golem sounded as if she might cry. Though Kasha suspected it was more the trauma of potential bird droppings than fear for her safety.

"Wait, Morrigan? She...she disappeared after the arch demon, and made me swear I'd never look for her. How could she know..."

Shale let out an exasperated sigh "You were not to seek her, that does not mean she cannot seek you. She used one of those vile creature forms she knew everything, she even used her foul magic to bring us here."

"She could not have done so if you had let me cut out her tongue as I had wanted" Sten gruffly added.

"Well, I'm glad we didn't...it is good to see you both again"

So Morrigan was watching out for her. An interesting thought indeed. They had grown as close as sisters in their travels. Which had confused poor Morrigan badly at first. The girl had never had a friend before, and it scared her terribly to care for another person. But by the end, she had learned how to be one in return. Even offering herself, in order to save both Kasha and Alistair from dying on that tower when the Arch Demon fell. The woman hated Alistair, and he hated her, yet they both came together, that one night...to save her.

"It is coming you know" Shale interrupted her thoughts. "It leaves Denerim in the morning. It knows where you are going. Would you like me to squish it before it gets here, I hear there are several of them but not so many that I could not squish them all?"

Kasha had to laugh. "No. No squishing Alistair. Though I appreciate the offer. We'll just have to get moving early"

"Then it should sleep, and so should the qunari. I will keep watch"

Shale had never bothered with names. Not for any of them. Wynne had been "The elder mage" and at one point "The fussy mage". Morrigan was "the swamp witch", Zev was "the painted elf", Leliana "the bard" or "the sister". Poor Alistair, he was just "it". Well, at least Wynne would be happy if she knew. Kasha was no longer unescorted. She whispered a thank you to the night air, hoping maybe Morrigan heard it, as she drifted off to sleep.

They were in Redcliffe castle. The Arl was comatose, and his son possessed by a demon. They were upstairs, fighting the horrible demon, when it finally fell, and resumed the form of the child, lying helpless on the floor. Lady Isolde was shrieking, hysterical, begging them not to kill him. Begging to let them have Jowyn, the blood mage that had poisoned Eamon, perform a blood magic ritual to send someone into the fade. Begging to sacrifice her own life for that of her son. That is when Kasha's carefully walled up humanity had started to crack. The images of her own nephew lying dead, and her mother refusing to leave her father and escape. Begging, demanding that she go with Duncan, all assaulted her at once. But she couldn't let her defenses fall, not now. It was a choice she didn't want to make, but she had to. She had to make all the choices. In the end she'd relented and allowed Isolde to die to save the boy.

They returned to camp. Alistair was screaming at her, questioning her choice. That is when it all came loose. For all his talk, about owing Eamon more than that, and criticizing her for not looking into other options, she could read between the lines.

"So this is about you, and Eamon, and not about me at all right?" She hissed back at him. "You would rather I had killed a child?"

his next words were poorly chosen, though he had no way of knowing. "You let lady Iolde sacrifice herself, how could you let her do that!"

With a deadly calm she turned, looked him square in the eye, and prayed the tears weren't visible "the same way I let my mother sacrifice herself for me." Then she turned and walked as far away from him, and everyone else as she could before she's let the tears loose. She was sitting near a small pond, knees pulled up to her chin, wracked with sobs when he sheepishly approached her. She knew he was there, quiet was not his strong suit.

"He was not much older than my nephew Ohren you know. Connor I mean. He and Fergus' wife Oriana were the first to die, when the castle came under attack. Mother and I fought our way through the castle searching for father. Mother insisted we go to the armory and save what we could. She used her key, and I guarded the door. Lethallin was missing, we'd gotten separated in battle. It was awful. People were dying, screaming, things were burning. I was alone at the door, and one of the men grabbed me, by the hair, and dragged me around the corner. ..two of his friends, they barred mother in the armory. I could hear her screaming to be let out"

He was sitting beside her now, she couldn't stop, she couldn't make the words stop.

"He...he did, terrible things, said terrible things I couldn't fight back, I couldn't get away, I couldn't get him off. He had my face pressed hard into the wall. I said no, I screamed no. I wanted to die. And he... said he deserved it, called me vile names, the mildest of which was a trophy of war. Lethallin got to me, and killed the bastard, but it was too late. And I couldn't cry, I couldn't feel, I had to fight, I had to save mother. "

She couldn't look at him, and she still couldn't stop talking, it was like her mind had to get it out.

"When we found father, he was dying. We tried to convince him to escape, but he couldn't move. Duncan came, and promised to take mother and I to safety, but she wouldn't go. I'd wanted to join when I met Duncan but father wouldn't allow it. But when Duncan asked him , to recruit me, in return for my safety, he said yes. But mother wouldn't come, she wouldn't leave him. She insisted on staying there, to guard father, and my escape. And I let her. I LET her sacrifice herself for ME. "

Alistair took her hand, and she looked at him. He apologized, for berating her.

"I understand. You couldn't have known. I should have told you, or at least allowed Duncan to. Instead I just...shut myself down. I threw myself at every sword in sight, and you just kept keeping me alive. Even when I was awful to you. If anyone should be sorry, it's me. I hope you can forgive me. Maybe we should start over."

He smiled and shook the hand he was holding, "Hi, I'm Alistair. Gray Warden and lover of fine cheeses" He grinned

She replied "I'm Kasha, and you're still a very strange man"

The weight she'd been carrying with her was lifting.

"Just one question Kasha, if you don't mind, you said these men attacked your...Castle?"

"Oh, yes, my father was Teyrn Bryce Cousland. He was preparing to go to Ostagar, when the attack took place."

"And who attacked you?"

"Arl Rendon Howe, his best friend, and Loghain's current right hand man"

Alistairs shocked face started to fade...

"Kadan, we must go. Get up." She heard Sten saying.

She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, and stood. Everything was packed up and ready to go. For the first time since she'd fled, she considered turning back. But regardless of her personal problems, Ostagar needed to be dealt with. She'd made a promise. She knew he was coming, but she wasn't ready just yet. She was starting to realize, though she didn't want to admit it, that this was partly her fault. She had grown up knowing one basic rule about life as nobility. Everyone is out for themselves. She'd told him that once, after meeting his gold digging sister. But she took it back, she couldn't stand to see him jaded like that. She'd envied his ability to see the good potential in everyone. But she should have reinforced it. Maybe then he wouldn't have believed...well, it didn't matter now, it was done. She wouldn't think about that now.