Chapter Seven
"Check this out. All three of us are at the same place. Can you believe that?" Gordo said, hoping to get the girls to give each other a reuniting hug or at least speak to each other. He looked to Miranda standing by the doorway. She put up the hood from her sweatshirt, but didn't move. Gordo then turned to Lizzie, who looked more hurt than angry at Miranda. He zipped his head from one friend to another like someone viewing a table tennis game. When it was clearly obvious none of the girls wanted to speak, move or do anything, Gordo stepped in, standing next to Lizzie.
"Don't you want to say something to Miranda?" Gordo said. Lizzie glared at him before facing Miranda.
"Yeah I do," Lizzie said, folding her arms as she walked to Miranda. "I can't believe you lied to me."
"You told her Gordo?" Miranda shouted. "And you promised you wouldn't!"
"Miranda I'm sorry but Lizzie deserves to know!"
Lizzie stomped her feet closer to Miranda, standing directly in front of her.
"How could you tell Gordo that I was taking him away from you? You know I'm not that kind of person!"
Miranda peered around Lizzie to gape at Gordo.
"I never said that! Gordo why would you tell her that?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say it like that. I just meant to tell her you felt like a third wheel."
"Well it doesn't matter, because you broke my promise. I really trusted you Gordo." Miranda starting heading out the Style Shack. "I think it was a huge mistake coming back here."
Gordo ran up to her, putting his hands on her arms. "That's not true Miranda."
Miranda thrusted her body away from him. "No! Get away from me. I hate you!"
The Style Shack's doors flew open and Miranda ran out, down the sidewalk. Gordo frowned, then turned to Lizzie. He gave her soft eyes, waiting for her to say something, but she shook her head and left the Style Shack in the opposite direction of Miranda, leaving Gordo standing alone with people gawking at him.
Gordo looked as the Style Shack's doors and didn't hesitate to run out to see if he could catch up with either Lizzie or Miranda, but they weren't visible. He shook his head and kicked his sneaker on the cement. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked to his car, giving up. Giving up on chasing after Miranda and stopping her from leaving.
That was until he got home. In his anger and frusturation, Gordo dug Miranda's journal out of the couch cushions. He looked at the etched lettering in the corner one last time, then he threw the book to the floor. It tumbled across the living room, but a page flew out.
Gordo held his head, screaming internally. He knelt down to pick up the journal. He eyed the page that got torn out by his own doing. It was written front and back, in small handwriting; every line filled. The heading read: A Letter I'll Never Deliver. Gordo stood to his feet and backed up to the couch. Sitting down, he began to read the letter.
A Letter I'll Never Deliver
Gordo, Gordo, Gordo. Where do I begin? First of all that nickname? How did I not realize that "gordo" means fat in Spanish? I don't know, but it's funny and I love it. It's weird calling you David, because your Gordo. Just Gordo.
Gordo my friend. My best friend. Gordo the most interesting, unique, weird (in a good way) person I know on this entire planet. Gordo the person I find myself thinking about as I lay awake and I don't know why.
Gordo, you are so special to me and my life. You've changed the way I see things. You've changed the way I see the world. But most importantly, you've changed the way I see you. Thanks a lot for that by the way, because now I'm struggling with watching you and Lizzie slowly become more than friends and wishing that it was me. But oh well, you need a friend to be there for you when you and Lizzie get together. So I guess I'm that person.
Anyway, I'm writing this letter to you even though I'll never give it, because I want to tell you this, but I'd never have the real courage to do it. So Gordo, you should know, I've got a crush on you. A real one. A crush that I think I've gone too deep in. But you'll never know about it. Oh and by the way, thank you for existing.
-Miranda
(Oh and I wrote a song for you. It's in this journal on the next page. Even though you'll never hear me sing it. )
Wow. That was all Gordo thought. Having a song written about you was deep. It means personal thoughts and feelings about yourself were put into lyrics, with music and a melody. Gordo had been thought up of in a form of art and it was supposed to be sung in the beautiful voice of Miranda Sanchez. Gordo opened the journal and flipped to the page with the song.
Wouldn't You Know?
By Miranda Sanchez
Hey, I've known you for quite sometime
but you were just a friend kind of guy
I never saw you as anything more
But then things started to change
My brain started to rearrange
You weren't the same guy I used to know
I saw you different
I saw you grow
Wouldn't you know?
I'm falling for you too
I'm starting see why she's so fond of you
It's the way you smile
Your eyes shines bright
Oh wouldn't you know
I just might
Be falling hard for you
Hey, it's difficult for me to say how I feel
But I think my crush for you is so real
If only you felt the same way
Wouldn't you know?
I'm falling for you too
I'm starting see why she's so fond of you
It's the way you smile
Your eyes shines bright
Oh wouldn't you know
I just might
Be falling hard for you
"What a sweet song," Gordo said. He imagined Miranda sitting in her bedroom, maybe with a guitar, singing those lyrics and it made him almost tear up because he knew she most likely cried while writing the song.
Gordo closed the journal, but kept the letter folded into his pants pocket. Then something occurred to him. He remembered he hadn't visited his parents' house in a while due to them being shrinks and were super busy all the time. His mother always insisted he was welcome anytime, but whenever he called, they didn't have time to have there son come over. He decided to take the chance then by phoning in and if they weren't busy for once, he could discuss the Miranda situation. He didn't know how much details he'd give, but he did want to mention her return to Hillridge and the incident at the Style Shack. Being that his parents were shrinks, he'd get lengthy advice on the matter.
Even though Gordo only moved out a year ago, he hardly ever went back to his childhood home and he knew stepping foot in there again would set off more memories. Miranda spent time there when they were paired together for projects. The trio had movie nights in Gordo's theater room and played games in the huge dining room. But perhaps the most notable memory to Gordo was in eighth grade, February 13th, a day before Valentine's Day.
Gordo was in his bedroom reading a book while simultaneously whacking his hacking sack; every so often he bent down to pick up the hacky sack when he messed up (but that rarely happened). Only one could do that for so long, so he put the book on his desk and threw his hacky sack on the bed. Being an only child was very boring for Gordo at times. Even when Lizzie and Miranda always complained about how annoying their younger siblings were, Gordo still wished he had someone to do stuff with while his parents had sessions in the home.
The real reason Gordo had been doing two things at once was to distract himself from the thought of Lizzie kissing that paper boy, Ronnie. He failed so hard. He still caught himself thinking of what he had witnessed when he was on his way to the McGuire's to give Lizzie a cd. Why Lizzie kissing another guy bothered him so much, he didn't know, but it got him agitated. He wanted to hangout with someone to get his mind off of it, so he decided to call Miranda. As he was bout to dial her number, four soft knocks came from the outside of Gordo's bedroom door. He scrunched his eyebrows as he set the phone down to see who was knocking. It couldn't be his mom or dad; they were working. He was surprised when he saw a distraught Miranda with her arms hugged against her chest, at the doorway.
"Are you okay?" Gordo said in a loud, but concerned voice.
Miranda shook her head as she walked in his room. She sat on his bed and thus began one of her famous rants. "It's Lizzie and Ronnie and this stupid holiday," she growled.
"Is that all?" Gordo asked, sitting with her. He knew that wasn't all.
"Lizzie said I'm jealous of her and Ronnie because she has a boyfriend and I don't. But that's the total opposite! I'm just annoyed because she's gone loco over this guy she only knew for like a day!"
Miranda stomped a foot on the floor and huffed out a heavy breath. Gordo never knew what to do when Miranda got irritable, but it was best to agree with her and he did agree with her. One hundred percent. Lizzie's sudden struck from Cupid bothered him too.
"Don't worry Miranda, I agree with you. Just try to calm down," Gordo comforted.
"I can't," Miranda said, thumping her back on the bed and bouncing in the air. "I'm so mad at her." She put her hands on her face and screamed.
"Fine then we'll be angry together." Gordo flopped back on the bed.
Gordo never related to Miranda more. That was one of the best things about being her friend. He always had someone to rant with; something he never did with Lizzie. It was their special thing. Granted, they usually ranted about Lizzie, so they were stuck with each other on that part, but still, he liked that.
"Valentine's Day sucks," Miranda said. "Because if you don't have a boyfriend then it's completely meaningless."
Gordo turned his head on the bed, looking at her face as she stared at the ceiling. "You know love's not exclusive to boyfriends and girlfriends. There's love in friendships."
Miranda jerked her head at him. Her face brightened. Gordo wondered what he said to change her mood.
"So our friendship, it has love?" she asked.
"A form of it."
Miranda looked up at the ceiling, smiling from ear to ear.
"What?" Gordo formed a tiny smile.
"Nothing." Miranda looked at him again and they exchanged smiles.
"Now I know why she smiled," Gordo said in his car as he pulled into his parents' home. When he called to let them know he was coming, no one answered, but he decided to go anyway because he knew they had an off day. He got out of his car and walked up the steps to the house he lived in his whole life. He pressed the door bell and it buzzed in his ear. Gordo's father opened the door and his eyes grew and his mustache curved upwards.
"David," his dad, Howard cheered. "What a surprise, usually you call first."
Gordo walked in the house. "I tried to, but you guys never answered. I knew you guys weren't working so I just came anyway."
"Oh sorry about that, we're changing phone lines," Howard said. "Have a seat David."
Gordo's parents always managed to make him feel like a patient.
"Roberta, David's here," Howard called. Gordo's mom showed up in the living room where they sat. She rushed to Gordo for a hug. When she pulled back, she studied his face.
"What's wrong David?"
"It's about Miranda isn't it?" Howard said out of the blue.
"Whoa. I know you guys are shrinks and all, but how did you know about that?" Gordo said.
"We happened to by physics too," Howard joked. Roberta smiled at him.
"Mrs. Sanchez called," Roberta said, debunking Gordo's amazement.
"Really? What did she say?"
"Just that they're finally back in town," Roberta told him.
"That's all?"
Howard leaned forward, shifting on the couch. "Why David? What happened? Didn't you three reunite?"
Gordo rubbed the back of his neck. "Kind of."
"David, we can't help you if you don't give us enough information," Howard said.
Gordo sighed and caught the eye of both his parents. He agreed to himself not to say much about Miranda and the occurrences of the past few days, but Gordo was having trouble figuring things out on his own and he needed the help from his parents.
"Listen, it's really confusing," Gordo told them.
"I'm sure your father and I can handle it," Roberta said.
"Go ahead David, we're listening," Howard encouraged.
"Okay it started when Lizzie and I went to the Digital Bean a few days ago. We reminisced and pondered about Miranda. Stuff we've been doing for the past four years. We had a movie night at Lizzie's apartment and that's when I found Miranda's journal. I don't know what it was doing there, but I took it home with me. I read it. I read her personal thoughts. As I did, things began to make sense. Miranda leaving, it was my fault the entire time. I'd always been mad at her for doing that to me and Lizzie, but I found out I should have been mad at myself."
"How was it your fault David?" Howard wondered.
"Because, Miranda liked me. As more than a friend. But you know I liked Lizzie for the longest time. She felt left out, a third wheel, alone. I let her go mom and dad. I made her feel like she didn't matter." Gordo's voice cracked when he really realized what he had done. Like really.
"Then I bumped into her the next day and we started talking. She explained everything to me. It was more clear when it came out of her mouth than when I had read her written words."
"So, does she still like you?" Roberta asked.
Gordo shook his head. "No. She told me she couldn't since we've been apart for four years. She was very supportive of me and Lizzie then and is now. Miranda is great like that."
"So what is the problem then?"
"The problem is, she lied to Lizzie. Her best friend. Her sister. Miranda told her she had to go Mexico because of family issues, when really she was tired of living in a Gordo and Lizzie centered life."
"Can you blame her?" Roberta said.
"Of course not. In eighth grade all my attention was so focused on Lizzie. I'd do the same if I were her."
"So the three of you didn't reunite?" Howard asked.
"We all happened to be at the Style Shack, but it ended so wrong. Now Lizzie hates Miranda, Miranda hates me. And I'm stuck in the middle."
Robert and Howard eyed each other. "If you were all really meant to be friends, do you think you would have found her journal or run into her David? Don't you think this is happening for a reason?" Roberta said.
"I did wonder that myself. But I don't think the three of us can look at each other the same. We have so much anger in all of us, it would be so hard to let go and move on from everything. It's frustrates me why Miranda couldn't have just told the truth in eighth grade and then we could have solved the issue, you know? I still have emotions inside of me that I can't get rid of just yet. I have Lizzie as a girlfriend. A wonderful girlfriend, but over the four years, a part of me was missing."
"David, you have a special relationship with Miranda. Don't throw it all away. Don't give up on that friendship," Howard insisted.
"It's kind of hard when your the only person who wants to try and the other half hates you."
