A guest reviewer left an irritated review for me and I want to address it real quick. I apologize for my awful grammar. I do type it rather quickly and don't usually have time to read through it again before I post it. That's why there are usually so many mistakes. I'll try to make it better in the future.
It had been three days since Elsa had been brought home from the hospital with her wrist wrapped in a blue hard cast. Two things had happened almost instantly the second they walked through the grand door of their home. The first being that Ashton had grounded Anna and forbade Elsa and Anna from interacting on the premise that it was for the trouble they got into together. The girls knew the truth behind their forced separation, Elsa more than Anna. For whatever reason Ashton had always harbored a deep hatred for anything pertaining to same sex couples and quite often was very verbose on that hatred. Many times Elsa had overheard him ranting about the sickness they plagued America with and if it were a right world they would be corralled up and off-ed. Each and every time it filled Elsa with cold dread, knowing her father would probably kill her if he ever found out about her own preferences. It was strange that all he did was instill the rule of no talking, no contact, nothing. She expected more. But then, the storm wasn't cleared yet. She felt it was only beginning to brew above their heads.
The second thing that happened was Irene. The way the woman changed was significant, Elsa knew that, but she couldn't pin point why. It was like before the broken wrist Irene had been holding her emotions in check but after it broke she didn't bother with that anymore and let them wash past the dam full force. Her care for Elsa had her constantly coming up to check on the girl to make sure she was taking the Advil they got her for her wrist, helping her with her hair and really anything else required of two hands including bringing food up to her. Not just that but her demeanor changed as well. She seemed agitated with something—her usually soft, warm features were always taut with stress and eyes darker than Elsa had ever seen them—but that agitation was never directed towards Elsa herself. For a while Elsa thought perhaps Irene was frustrated with Anna since her daughter had never been one to go against rules or anything that would upset her mother before the supposed drunken incident. Then, on the fifth day since they came home from the hospital, Ashton came up stairs while Elsa was in the shower and Irene was making her bed. It was right when Elsa shut the water that she could hear their hushed fight coming from her room about how Irene was babying Elsa, being to lenient with Anna, and definitely shouldn't be making a 20 year olds bed for her. Through the crack in the door Elsa had seen Irene raise a hand to silence him and simply told him they wouldn't be fighting about this again as she had told him how she felt about all this. Elsa felt touched that Irene would fight with her father over her wellbeing and the care she showed for that wellbeing. Ashton had huffed but allowed Irene the small victory and left her room in a pouty diva storm out kind of way. Irene was more agitated after that day.
On top of all drama between Irene and Ashton, not being able to see Anna, Elsa also had the business card weighing on her mind. Amelia gave little in way of explanation to Elsa and if the girl were being honest she wanted to know why her mother left her. She had read the card enough times that she had all the information listed memorized. Every day that passed made her more eager to call the number, to go to the address and demand answers, but there was still a fear deep inside Elsa. A fear of rejection and fear that the reason her mother left wouldn't be one she would want to hear. Amelia may have left Ashton because she wanted another man but that wouldn't explain why she never came back for Elsa or even tried to take her from Ashton. All Elsa knew was that her mother sent the occasional letter that she never got to see if Ashton even told her about them. Usually she only knew she had received one by his escalated anger he took out on her. She wanted answers and it took her nearly a week to decide she was going to get them.
It was a little thrilling to finally break one of Ashton's rules even if it was 12 years in the making. She had to wait until Ashton had left for work and Irene was busy in her study, doing whatever she did for work. Strange that Elsa still didn't know what that was exactly but she didn't mind. As long as it kept Irene close, she would continue to not mind. She quite liked Irene nowadays.
Once she was certain Ashton was gone she had slipped from her room to sneak downstairs, past Anna's room that was strangely quiet and through the living room to the eastern hall that led into the massive five car garage. Elsa had been inside the garage almost more than she had been in her bedroom in the attic to clean all the expensive cars Ashton kept. Wash them, tune them once she learned how, and tinker with them which Ashton didn't know about. Whenever writing couldn't take the edge off Elsa's awful life she would sneak down to the garage and dirty her hands with grease and oil scrape the skin off her knuckles twisting this and tightening that, strain her eyes and muscles to get at different nuts and bolts. It gave her a satisfaction to know that when her brain could not supply her what she needed then her hands could. During the summers, when they stayed at their Florida home where Ashton kept his more expensive collection of cars, Elsa could sometimes drive them on the track he owned near the property but only if he was away for work or unaware.
The door clicked shut behind her on quiet well greased hinges and nearly caught one of the straps of her canvas back pack with how quickly it swung closed. She wrapped her fingers around the nearly trapped straps and let out a quiet sigh of relief. Thank goodness this door wasn't squeaky like the door to the backyard and the door to the pantry was. Irene had super hearing and would be bound to find Elsa trying to sneak out which she knew wouldn't be an issue unless Irene told Ashton. She maneuvered her way between a remodeled 1950's Chevy pickup and one of Ashton's many expensive Harley's to the sporty Jaguar closest to the garage door. Ashton kept the keys to each vehicle in the glove compartments which made it easier for her unlike the keys for the larger collection in Florida which he kept in a locked cabinet. Before she started the car up she pulled her laptop out of her backpack and set it up in the passenger seat with a map pulled up highlighting the way to the address on her mother's business card. Arendelle was a small town as far as size but it was compact with a great many people in an even greater amount of buildings that were cropped together towards the center of the town but spread out towards the outskirts. It could be very confusing to navigate for someone who had lived in Arendelle their entire life so for someone like Elsa who had hardly left except to go to the airport or the grocery store it was one large puzzle.
Not to long later she was driving down the roads of Arendelle in the expensive car with sunshine bending around her sun visor and soft music filling the space of the car as something to calm her raging nerves more than leisure listening. Waking up this morning knowing she was going to confront her mother had been easy, thrilling even, but now that she was actually on route the thrill was transforming into needling worry that was steadfastly becoming an icy fear. She felt jittery and tense like she had drunk far too much coffee. Her fingers were thrumming against the steering wheel almost as quickly as her left foot was tapping against the floorboard. On every off second she was carding her fingers through the small unevenly cut parts of her hair that her thick braid couldn't capture. She had thought she wanted the answers to all her questions but now she was afraid of what those answers could do to her. All her life she had grown up with one parent who hated her for existing and the other was simply an enigma who on the off occasion would send her a letter or two. If she came all this way only to find out her mom didn't want her then she knew she'd walk away a crushed woman. She could stomach Ashton's hatred because of the tolerance to such hate she had slowly built but to have her mother hate her too? The damage would be irreversible.
By the time she had pulled up outside the tall intimidating building her mother worked out of she was a shaking mess. Her hair was in absolute disarray to the point she had to sit there for twenty minutes to undo and redo her braid and since she had worked herself up worrying about how she looked she undid the blue flannel shirt she threw on this morning and redid it, smoothing the long front tails of the shirt across the thighs of her white jeans. Everything took twice as long as it should since she was still struggling with her cast and the occasional miniscule pain from her wrist that would flare up with certain movements. She took her time folding her laptop up and sliding it back into her canvas bag, glancing out of the window at the tall building sharply dressed people were steadily pouring in and out of. Whatever her mother did up there had to be important. Now she felt completely underdressed and was half tempted to drive home to change but she knew if she did then she would never build the nerves to drive back. It was a now or never kind of moment. She only wished she had invited Anna along to help ease her social discomfort and hold her hand while she talked to her mother.
She kept her head down as she made her way into the large building, pausing only to silently praise to large glass double doors with large frosted snowflake shapes in the top most center of each door. Amelia had always had a fascination with snow and the beautiful patterns of snow flakes. The fascination had carried over to Elsa to the point that almost everything Elsa wore was an ice blue or snow white and many of her characters in her various stories had powers over winter. Sometimes she hated that she loved something that meant so much to the mother that abandoned her but most of the time it made her feel warm inside like she had this small connection with Amelia.
The main floor of the building was massive and extremely overwhelming for Elsa. There was a pool of people in stiff suits and pressed skirts teaming about, interweaving with one another but seeming to not even notice the others presence, and there was one long conjoining desk that ran along the center back wall with elevators on each side of it. Every few minutes an elevator door would open and more suits would either pour out or filter in the main room. Now that she was among the bustle she had little control over where she was going since she was to timid to shove back when a woman in a hurry bumped her or a man's large shoulder rammed into her own much smaller one. Eventually, somehow, she was pushed against the main desk away from the scary mass of bodies. A woman's overly peppy voice assaulted her ears even above the chatter and clamor of the busy bodies mucking about. She turned around and found the woman sitting behind the desk in one of many computer chairs lining the desk from behind, long fake nails poised over a keyboard and a blue tooth in her ear peeking out from under her bushy brown hair. Elsa returned her toothy smile with a shy little upturn of her lips.
"Hello sweetheart. Are you lost?" Her inquisitive eyes ran over Elsa's wardrobe and the canvas computer bag hung over her shoulders.
"No!…well yes. Sort of. Um," She dug around her front pockets for her mothers business card then her back pockets, finally grasping it, and held it up for the woman to squint at, "I'm looking for my mother's office."
The woman leaned as close as she could with her workspace atop the desk between them before shaking her head and sitting back in her seat, "I'm sorry sweetie I forgot my glasses at home. Tell me who your mother is and I'll look up her office number."
"Oh. Okay." Elsa lifted the card to read the name off even though she had it memorized by now, "Amelia Riavani." Over the many times Elsa had read the card since it had been given to her she tried to remember what her mother's maiden name was. Each time she tried to remember she couldn't but she was always certain that it wasn't Riavani and each time it made her feel more and more sad. Her mother must have remarried and taken another surname. It made Elsa wonder if her mother remarried perhaps she had more children and that was why she never came back for Elsa. Why would she when she had a new perfect family?
The woman behind the desk let out a noise of surprise and lifted her hand to her chest, pressing her fingers against the top of her breasts, "You're the mayor's daughter?"
Elsa blinked her surprise. The mayor? Her mother was the mayor of Arendelle? How had she managed to miss something like that when the debates and the candidacy were all Ashton and his high life group of friends talked about? Vaguely she remembered them talking about the female candidate that supported a great many things they disagreed with and how they hoped she didn't win.
The woman eyed Elsa again more closely this time, squinting at her face and her willowy frame, "Well you certainly look like Amelia but you know I can't just let anyone up who claims to be her daughter. Let me just…" She held up a long finger and pressed a few buttons of her phone. Elsa only heard one side of the three second conversation before the woman gave her another surprised look and flagged her towards the elevator.
"She says you should come up now. It's the top floor. Only door there." The two women on either side of the bushy haired one in front of Elsa shot her looks and leaned towards the bushy haired woman to begin whispering. Elsa tried to ignore them and gave the woman a quiet thank you. Their whispering grew louder once she turned her back but not loud enough for her to make out what they were saying. Either this job didn't offer enough entertainment or they were thirsty for any type of gossip. Whichever it was Elsa didn't want to know she only wished she didn't have to be the focus of their attention. She battled her way to the elevator and squeezed herself in among the men and woman cross talking over one another into their phones or with coworkers about their work. Elsa tried to melt herself into the wall and closed her eyes to block out the feeling of their shoulders pressed against hers. She didn't like large groups of people as it was but she most assuredly didn't like loud groups of people that were so close she could feel their body heat trapped in an enclosed space. The long ride to the top was testing her abilities to remain passive. At each floor they stopped on a new person got on and off dragging them in this up and down battle until she finally realized that she had to speak up to let them know she intended to ride it to the very top. The intimidation factor was far too much for her and after three failed attempts at speaking up she pushed her way off at a random floor to take the stairs. Unfortunately she hadn't paid mind to which floor she got off on and ended up walking up six flights of stairs from the first floor to the top. No matter how fit she seemed she didn't get out enough to actually exercise and was breathing hard by the time she reached her mother's floor.
The door led to a small lobby that was obviously made to be a waiting room with leather chairs lining the walls and glass tables between them littered with reading material. Oddly enough there were no bodies filling the room awaiting their chance to speak with the mayor. At the end of the oval shaped room was a wall of frosted glass a tall glass door was anchored in. Like the double doors at the base of the building there was a large intricate snow flake design printed in the glass at the top center of the door. Above that printed in swooping silvery letters was her mothers name and her mayoral status. She couldn't see through the frosted glass but she knew, on the other side of it, her mother was waiting for her.
She wasn't brave enough to walk over and open that door. Not just yet. She paced the lobby, tapping her fingers against her blue cast, and religiously combed her fingers through her uneven bangs not tangled in with her braid. She must have been pacing for a good twenty minutes before the door to Amelia's office came open in front of her and woman stepped out. Not her mother, thankfully, but someone whom Elsa wasn't familiar with. She stepped back in surprise and went to stuff her hands in her pockets, forgetting about her cast like she had been doing since she got it, and had to pull her fingertips back out when the large blue obstruction refused to fit into the small space. She tipped her head down in embarrassment and stepped to the side so the woman would have room to step past but instead she stood there, eyeing Elsa intensely until Elsa lifted her head to shyly meet her gaze. The woman had the most interesting color of eyes like amber honey swirling around the darker ring of tawny brown hugging the dark of her pupils. She had glossy black hair that hung over one shoulder clear down to her hip, brushing against the silken material of her incredibly crisp pantsuit. Even though she was an inch or so shorter than Elsa she was incredibly intimidating. Her intense eyes flashed down to her cast and an aggravated frown pulled at her darkly painted lips. Out of habit Elsa felt she had done something wrong and went to hide her cast behind her back, shoulders caving in on themselves. That only seemed to aggravate the woman more. She let out a loud huff of anger and glanced over her shoulder into Amelia's office. Seconds later Amelia herself appeared in the doorway behind this strange woman with olive toned skin darkened by the sun. As soon as Amelia's bright blue eyes landed on Elsa they lightened and a happy smile lit up her face.
"I'll take my leave," The woman spoke in a low voice that, although clearly irritated, was so rich and throaty that it sounded enchanting regardless, "You'll call me if you need anything won't you Amelia?"
Elsa watched the way her mother smiled at the exotic woman, a look that was clearly the look of a very happy woman, "Of course Riavani but it's not like my daughter is going to kill me. Are you Elsa?" Amelia's twinkling eyes lifted to Elsa, that same playful look now turned towards her. It was supposed to be fun, that Elsa knew, but it was just another thing that confused and frightened her like all new and confusing things did. She fidgeted beneath her mother's unreadable gaze and dropped her eyes, trying to will herself to disappear with her thoughts alone.
"Of course not ma'am."
"Ma'am? Lord child you are making me feel billions of years old." To Elsa it sounded reprimanding even though Amelia's voice held obvious warmth and tones that meant she was teasing.
"Sorry."
The woman let out another angry noise that made Elsa lift her head just enough to look at her folding her arms and tapping her heel against the marble flooring, "I can't stand him." Elsa furrowed her brows in confusion. What a random thing to say. Amelia though seemed to understand what the woman meant by the cryptic statement and pressed her palm against the woman's lower back. Elsa wondered if it was meant to be comforting or reprimanding or a mixture of the two.
"Hush it you sassy creature and go get me food. It is my lunch break and look," She gestured over her shoulder at her office with a mock pained look on her face, "No lunch. You'd let me starve?"
The woman reached over to remove Amelia's hand by pinching her wrist between two of her long fingers and flinging it away, looking entirely unimpressed, "Your upkeep is far too high. I'm honestly considering sending you back to Petco."
Amelia scoffed and slapped the woman's bicep which would have made solid contact if the woman hadn't moved just a fraction out of the way seconds before, "That is an awful thing to say Riavani!" There it was again. That name. Why was her mother referring to this woman as Riavani when that was the surname on her business card? Was it a coincidence that her mother was friends with a woman whose first name was the same as her last name? Or was this woman a relative to her mother's new husband and preferred to be referred to by her last name instead of her first? Elsa rubbed at the hard material of her cast while they playfully bickered. At least she assumed it to be playful. It didn't sound like true anger.
"Would you like me to get you something as well?" Elsa blinked at Riavani for quite some time until it clicked in her that she was asking Elsa this question. Immediately Elsa shook her head even though her stomach felt empty.
"Elsa it's no trouble really." Amelia smiled at in her in such a way that the nostalgia of that smile slammed into her chest like one of Ashton's punches. Amelia use to smile at her like that when she sang Elsa to sleep or when she helped wash her hair in one of her bathes. It was a rare smile as Elsa couldn't remember her mother doing much except looking sad and stressed beyond her years but it use to be her favorite thing in the whole world. Seeing it again made a hurt spread through her like venom and served to remind her that this woman who Elsa use to love with every bit of her existence had abandoned her and left her with Ashton.
"No thank you."
Riavani stared her down with those intense eyes that Elsa was sure would haunt her dreams for years to come, "I'm bringing you food. What would you like?"
"I…" Elsa wasn't use to this at all. It was making her more and more uncomfortable by the second. People didn't go out of their way to do nice things for her. At least not until recently with Anna and Irene but even then it still felt foreign to her. They were gentler about it, hinting around it until Elsa finally felt semi comfortable enough to allow them what they wished to do for her, where this woman just bluntly refused to let Elsa feel like a burden.
Riavani nodded shortly and moved her crisp sleeve up her forearm to check her watch for the time, "I'll surprise you then and I'll be back shortly. Are you allergic to anything?"
"Bees." Amelia helpfully supplied. Elsa was surprised that she had remembered that after all this time. Elsa herself forgot most of the time since it was a minor allergy and she was never outside long enough to worry too much about being stung.
Riavani gave Amelia a side glance that looked almost amused if Elsa thought this grouchy woman were capable of lighter emotions, "I won't order the honeycomb salad then. Play nice while I'm away. I don't need to deal with another lawsuit because you insulted someone or something else equally ridiculous."
Amelia rolled her eyes and made a point of speaking directly to Elsa to include her in their playful bickering, "She likes when I get in trouble. It gives her something to do and it makes more sense that I'm paying her ridiculous amounts of money to be my lawyer when she just sits at her desk all day."
"You forgot about the part where you send me out to fetch you meals when your hungry and listen to you bitch about the idiots breathing down your neck all day long." Riavani threw one last comment over her shoulder as she walked towards the elevator, heels clicking against the marble.
"I do no such thing," Amelia appeared to think it over a moment, "Most of the time anyway but that is far beyond the point right now. You came here to talk to me I'm assuming and here I am being rude and ignoring you to talk to Riavani. Would you like to come in?" Amelia stepped to the side and gestured inside her office, showing hesitance for the first time since Elsa had shown up. Perhaps now without the safety blanket of someone she knew around Amelia was feeling the awkward and uncomfortable tension Elsa had been practically drowning in.
It only grew thicker when they both entered the large office space and the door closed behind them. Elsa sat in the deceivingly comfortable chair in front of Amelia's cluttered desk and set her backpack in her lap and folded her arms overtop it. To avoid looking at Amelia who looked rather uncomfortable herself she looked around the room to take in her mother's work space. The wall behind Amelia's desk was made entirely of glass to give her a nice view of the city she governed. The rest other two walls on the left and right side of Elsa was covered by bookshelves housing thousands of books of every shape size and color. It was an impressive library that Elsa longed to look over one book at a time for classic treasures and interesting new finds. Above the shelves tacked to the walls themselves were framed college degrees and a few pictures. In almost every picture the woman Riavani appeared adorning a huge beaming smile and her intense eyes were full of kindness. While that was strange it didn't throw her like two of her photos did. One was a framed ultrasound that she realized was herself in her mother's womb and the other, tacked near the ultrasound, was an old picture of Elsa as a toddler in Amelia's arms kissing her mother's cheek. It was a picture Elsa hadn't ever seen before. As far as she knew Ashton had thrown out all pictures with Amelia in them and since Elsa was nearly always in Amelia's arms or near her that meant most of Elsa's baby pictures and the like were thrown out too. If Amelia had them then she had to have taken them with her when she ran off. Why would she take the pictures and not Elsa herself?
"Elsa?" She looked away from the pictures back to her mother worrying her lip between her impeccably white teeth, "I'm sorry if Riavani made you uncomfortable. She can come off a bit cold and vulgar sometimes but really she's an absolute sweetheart."
"She didn't seem to like me much. She kept….huffing at me."
Amelia cracked a smile, "It's not you she doesn't like. I promise."
"That….doesn't really make sense," Elsa twisted her fingers into the tail of her flannel and glanced over at a picture of her mother hugging the woman Riavani from behind, "You two seem close. I mean for a lawyer and her boss is all I mean. I'm not…trying to imply anything."
Amelia's smile grew fuller and brighter and a happy lilting laugh poured from her that nearly made Elsa jump from her chair in surprise, "I think it's alright to imply. I am married to the woman after all."
Elsa was certain she looked a fool with her mouth hung open and her eyes so wide but she couldn't help it. Her mother had taken her completely by surprise. Amelia looked a little shaken by Elsa's obvious surprise of the news.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
Elsa shook her head slowly, brows pinched together in confusion, "That doesn't make any sense at all."
"What doesn't make sense?"
"You being married to that woman…? Father told me you ran off with some man and left us behind. I always figured that was why he was so angry all the time and that was why you didn't want me. I don't…I don't understand. You ran off with that woman? Riavani?"
Amelia didn't seem to understand how to take what Elsa had told her. She was shaking her head and looked immeasurably sad but also terrifyingly angry like she was torn between which emotions to express. They sat in silence for a long while until finally Amelia rose from her chair to come round the desk and kneel down in front of Elsa, resting her hands on both of Elsa's knees and staring up at her daughter imploringly. Elsa was proud of herself for only flinching a little.
"Elsa I didn't run off with anyone and I certainly did not want to leave you with Ashton. I fought tooth and nail to keep you and make you mine. I did, you have to believe that. I don't know the extent of what your father told you but I can almost guarantee it was all lies. I love you Elsa. I have always loved you. You were my whole world Elsa and it killed me to walk away from you."
"Then why did you? Why did you leave me? Didn't you know what he was like? Didn't you know what he would do to me if you left me like that? If you loved me so much why didn't you take me with you mommy?" Tears dripped down Elsa's cheeks slow at first then steadily when the emotions she had been keeping down for so long resurfaced. Amelia reached to brush them away but stopped half way when Elsa flinched and jerked her head back. Hurt flashed through her eyes and Elsa probably would have felt guilty under normal circumstances but this was the woman who had rejected her and hurt her beyond measure so she managed to ignore it.
"Elsa," Amelia's voice was thick and wobbly, sounding choked when she spoke just above a whisper, "My Elsa. I swear I didn't want this. I did all that I could but you don't understand the situation I was in. Sweetheart you weren't, well, planned for lack of a better way to say that."
Elsa sniffed pathetically and rubbed her cheeks on the arm of her flannel to rid it of her tears, "What does that have to do with you not taking me with you?"
"Because your father's family is old and powerful and they follow the basic set of rules. Your grandmother was very controlling of your father when he was in college which is where I met him. See most of my life I had only ever been attracted to woman but I was at a party and had been indulging myself quite a bit and I saw your father there and just felt so bad for him. He wasn't very popular and he didn't really know how to act around his peers since he grew up being sheltered and treated like a prince in Norway. I saw him and it wasn't that I was attracted to him but I felt bad for his not knowing anyone and I intended to talk to him but one thing led to another and we ended up sleeping together. When I woke up the next morning I thought nothing of it and checked it off as confirming my attraction to woman and fully intended to forget about the indecent forever but then I started getting sick all the time. After a few weeks I took a test that confirmed I was pregnant with you. I fell in love with you that instant. Don't think for a second that I wanted to get rid of you or was unsure about being your mother. The second I realized I was pregnant I wanted nothing more than to be your mother.
"That's why I went along with your grandmother's crazy ideals. After I told your father I was pregnant I didn't really expect much out of him. He was young and afraid and so terribly shy that I just thought he'd want to pretend you weren't his but instead he called his mother and she flew to American to sit us down and talk. She insisted that your father and I get married even though I didn't even know his full name let alone love him. I wasn't even attracted to him but your grandmother made it very clear that if I did not marry him then she would use her power and money to make sure that you went to your father and I couldn't let that happen. So I married him. I wasn't happy Elsa in fact I was miserable but I stayed for you and you alone. Ashton was an attentive husband and a good father but we both knew I wasn't happy and that I didn't love him. He just refused to acknowledge it until I told him that I couldn't do it anymore and asked for a divorce. I told him I didn't love him and I hadn't ever loved him or been attracted to him. He…blew up. He accused me of using him for his money and lying to him all through the years and called me the most awful names. He was twice as furious at me when I told him it wasn't exactly him that did anything wrong it was just that I had never truly been attracted to men. He deduced that I was evil, all lesbians were evil, and we were out to get him. He had always had issues with feeling accepted as a mans man and worthy of affection so I did feel guilty for that because I knew my wanting a divorce for those reasons would only make all that worst.
"The divorce was bad but the custody battle was downright nasty. Your father fought me for you simply because he knew you are the thing I love most in this world and he wanted to hurt me by taking you away from me. I hired Isabelle as my attorney for that. Although I almost never call her that, I usually just refer to her by her last name Riavani. God it must have lasted at least two months and I began to resent and even grow to hate your father for everything he was doing. Eventually though he managed to either buy out the judge or find one that was so homophobic that he deemed me an unfit mother because of my sexuality. Something along the lines of not being able to give you a proper home life with a mother and a father and how it would screw you up mentally. Ashton won and I was granted supervised visits on the weekends. However whenever I tried to visit you Ashton would never be home with you or simply wouldn't let me in. Riavani tried to fight with the judge about that saying he was breaking the terms of agreement but no one ever listened. I suspect your grandmother's money had a play in that. I sent you letters as often as I could and I always sent you gifts on Christmas and your birthday but everything went unanswered. I figured you resented me for not being around or perhaps Ashton had filled your head with lies and that was why you never replied. I sent you an invitation to my wedding but that too went unanswered. It hurt more than you know not to have you there. I've missed you so much Elsa. Believe me when I say not a single day has gone by that you weren't on my mind or that I haven't wanted to just come see you. Once I decided on kidnapping you and would have done it if Riavani hadn't drove past me walking through your neighborhood looking for your house.
"I understand if you are angry at me and hate me. I'm not asking you to forgive me Elsa I just want you to give me a chance. I want to get to know you and learn who you have become. Lord you've grown up so much I hardly recognized you at that party. You are old enough that the stupid rules about our visits don't apply anymore. Ashton has no control over us. If you would like you can come live with Riavani and I for a while to get away from Ashton and if you decide you don't like living with us or don't like me then I will help you find your own apartment. What do you say? Will you give me a chance?" Amelia ended her long speech with pleading eyes and a heaving chest. Somewhere in the middle of it she had begun to cry which only made Elsa cry harder with silent sobs that shook her shoulders. It was emotional overload. Coming here today to demand answers had been a very thought out plan and even though she had been hopeful she had not at all expected her mother give her any kind of answer to her questions outside of telling her she left Elsa because she didn't want a daughter like Elsa. Never had she expected to come into this office and have her mother crumble before her eyes and practically beg for Elsa's love. She stood abruptly, dumping her bag with her laptop onto the floor heedlessly, and she took great steps to distance herself from Amelia. The woman stood slowly and wrapped her arms around her torso like she were comforting herself or stopping herself from launching forward to stop Elsa from moving away.
"This is….I don't know what to do. You are asking me to do so much. I have never….Ashton would be furious if he even knew I were talking to you. If he found out you were trying to convince me to move in with you," She sucked in a sharp breath as images of pools and large fists slamming into her fragile body crossed her mind, "This is scaring me."
Amelia made a pained noise in the back of her throat and her hands twitched at her side, reaching out for a second before coming back around her middle, "You don't need to be afraid me Elsa. I would never hurt you. I'd hurt myself before I ever thought about hurting you. I just want what is best for you. I don't know what has been going on in that home since I left but," Her blue eyes drifted down to the cast on Elsa's wrist and a look crossed her face that scared Elsa witless, "I get the feeling that is not a safe environment. I have no concrete proof but if I find out he has been hurting you or even making your life hard I swear to you I will bring hell to his doorstep."
Elsa's eyes widened and she hugged her broken wrist to her chest without conscious thought, "Why would you say that? I…he isn't hitting me. Don't…I have to go. Goodbye." Without another word Elsa turned on her heels and ran from the office, neglecting to even remember that she had left her backpack with her laptop on her mother's office floor. She blew past Isabelle who has just stepped off the still open elevator, arms full of boxes that smelled absolute divine. She gave Elsa a strange look and opened her mouth to speak but the elevator doors slid shut with Elsa safely behind them stopping anything she may have said before Elsa could hear it. She shoved her way off the elevator as soon as it made its first stop to run down the stairs and out the building back to the safety of the Jaguar. Her mind and body felt numb during the entire drive back home. Everything that had just transpired was too much for her to stomach right now and all she wanted was the comfort of something familiar. She didn't bother to park Ashton's car in the exact spot it had been in before which she vaguely knew she'd be in trouble for. However it was far from her mind at the moment. She moved through the house like a ghost letting her instincts guide her to Anna's bedroom and push the door open without asking for permission to enter. Anna was sitting at her computer desk with headphones on, watching something on the widescreen monitor, with her back turned to Elsa. Elsa moved on autopilot. She closed her door softly and walked towards Anna on shaky legs, gently removing her headphones and accidentally startling the girl. She jumped and spun in her chair with her fists up.
"Elsa? Fuck me you scared the shit out of me!" She slouched in the chair and pressed her hand to her chest and heaved a great sigh of relief. Elsa didn't respond, didn't smile, didn't laugh, didn't make a sound. She simply sat down in Anna's lap and curled into the girl, winding her long arms around Anna's slender middle and hid her face in the crook of her neck. After a few seconds hesitation Anna returned the hug and propped her chin on top of Elsa's head, her fingers messaging the nape of her neck. The simplicity of the touch and the comfort Elsa drew from it did well to ease the turbulence inside left by the confrontation with her mother. She was so worked up she didn't even register that this was the first time she had even seen Anna since that night at the party.
"Elsa? What's wrong? Did Ashton hurt you again?" Elsa detected a slight growl in Anna's voice. Usually she'd placate the girl but she didn't even think of it this time. Her whole world felt unstable, ready to tilt from underneath her and send her toppling into the universe of nothing, except for Anna. Anna was the only thing that made her feel grounded.
"Just hold me Anna."
"Okie doke. No problems there." Her arms tightened around Elsa's back, meshing their bodies together in the small chair they were both sitting on, and she pressed a kiss to the top of Elsa's head. She'd worry about explaining everything to Anna later if she managed to sneak out of there without Irene or Ashton noticing. They had a few hours yet before Ashton came home and Irene came out of her study to check on them. She'd savor that time.
Well I hope you lot liked this chapter. Sorry about the wait. You all probably got use to having a new update everyday for that week or so. Sorry for the mistakes you are bound to find!
