The next morning, they stopped by at a nearby cafe for a quick bite of breakfast. The five of them all crammed together on one small table, searching through the breakfast menu for something to order.

"How come there isn't any pasta?" Feliciano complained. Lovino glanced up and glared at him.

"It's a breakfast menu, idiot," he snapped. "Why the hell would there be pasta on it?"

"...Do they take special requests?" Feliciano began looking around for a worker, looking intent on asking them.

"Stop acting like an idiot," Lovino snapped. "Order something else!"

"Why don't you try the pancakes?" Alfred suggested, smiling at his friend. "They sound pretty good."

"Yes, they do," Feliciano admitted, lowering is eyes slightly. "But...pasta..."

"You're having the pancakes!" Lovino growled.

Alfred inwardly beamed at that. Lovino had taken his suggestion; oh that was...well, okay, there were a lot of other things Lovino could have agreed with him on (the two of them running away to Vegas and getting married, for example) but still...he'd agreed with him!

"Pancakes are like, so fatty," Feliks complained. "I can't like, eat those! I need to like, keep my gorgeous figure!"

"Oh shut up," Lovino grumbled.

"We'll head over to Roderich and Elizaverta's house as soon as this is done," Ludwig told them. "Hopefully...they won't slam the door in our faces. Or call the police."

Alfred frowned. "Seriously, I don't get it. Why would they be so freaked out? They don't even know us."

"They know me," Ludwig replied.

Lovino glared at him. "Great, Potato Bastard," he spat. "You've gone and screwed up this, too."

"It isn't my fault!" Ludwig shot back. "Blame my brother."

"But what did he do?" Alfred's brow furrowed slightly. "I mean, it can't be that bad!"

"It's like, Gilbert," Feliks pointed out.

"...True."

"What did he do, Potato Bastard?" Lovino sounded slightly curious.

"Oh you know..." Ludwig let out an awkward laugh. "...Pretended to be a deranged stalker to freak Elizaverta out, when she dumped him and started going out with Roderich..."

Everyone stared at him.

"...Thats fucked," Lovino said, at last.

"I like, knew Gilbert was like, out of his mind!" Feliks exclaimed. "Ever since that one time he like, completely freaked after I told him to like, change his hair colour!"

"No," Alfred told him. "That was completely understandable."

Feliciano stared at Ludwig, frowning slightly. "Was Elizaverta very angry?"

Ludwig snorted. "Let's just say, Gilbert came out of the whole thing with a severe concussion."

"What?!" Lovino's eyes were widened in horror. "And we're going to see these people?!"

Alfred swallowed heavily.

"Well," Ludwig said, trying to stay optimistic. "I'm sure they won't act nearly as badly with me...I think Elizaverta liked me..."

"Before or after your brother stalked her?" Alfred demanded, his voice tinged with panic.

"He didn't stalk her." Ludwig coughed, awkwardly. "He just...pretended to."

"How do you pretend to stalk someone?!"

"Your family is fucked," Lovino told Ludwig. "It's as simple as that - don't try to justify it."

"I'm not!" Ludwig glared at him. "I'm just saying, my brother isn't really a deranged stalker..."

Alfred, Feliks and even Feliciano, all exchanged glances.

"So like, what's the plan?" Feliks asked, after a brief pause. "Are we like, just going to go up and like, ask them to give Mattie back his spot?"

"I don't think it'll be that simple" Alfred sighed. "We're probably going to have to pull out some bribes."

"Oh god." Ludwig shuddered. "Elizaverta has the creepiest fetishes..."

"...Or maybe we can come up with something else."

"Maybe we can ask, very nicely," Feliciano suggested. "Maybe then they'll say yes!"

Lovino snorted. "Yeah right, fratello. I'm sure they'd happily ruin their wedding for the sake of someone else."

Alfred winced at his wording; the more he thought about it, the more ridiculous he realized his plan was. What was he going to do; go up to them and ask them to put their wedding on hold, so that two people they had never met could have their happy day? The most likely scenario was that he would get a door slammed in his face.

"Like, what were those fetishes?" Feliks asked Ludwig.

"Stop it!" Alfred snapped. "We aren't going to resort to that. We'll keep our dignity!"

Lovino glanced at him and raised one eyebrow. "What dignity?"

...

The car ride to Elizaverta and Roderich's house went very much like every other one they'd had; loud and filled with chaos, and violent threats.

"Fuck, finally," Lovino groaned, sounding relieved as the car finally pulled up in front of a house.

Alfred pressed his nose against the window, gazing out at the house. It wasn't too big or too small; it wasn't overly impressive. It looked like every other house on the street.

When he told Lovino this, the Italian simply grimaced.

"I think you're just looking for reasons to talk to me," he muttered, sounding none too pleased by the statement.

Alfred didn't argue against this since...well, it was pretty much true.

"Like, what a tacky house." Feliks' nose crinkled as he studied the building. "I like, would love to burn that thing down."

Ludwig turned to stare at him, looking faintly horrified. "Don't say that!" he cried. "Not here...can you imagine the reaction if either or them heard?"

Alfred's eyes widened slightly. "I'd never get Mattie's spot back!"

"Oh, that would be so sad!" Feliciano's lower lip wobbled. "I really don't like sad things...which is why, we really need to save Mattie's wedding!"

Lovino snorted. "Among other things."

"Yeah," Feliks agreed, "Like, how Alfred will lose his genitals if we don't like, fix his mess."

Alfred scowled at him. "I'm glad I have such brilliant friends."

"I like, tell it how it is."

Lovino glanced at Ludwig, and then jerked his head towards the door. "Potato Bastard, go knock," he growled.

"What?" Ludwig's eyes widened. "Why should I do it?"

"You're the only one who actually knows these people," Lovino pointed out.

"Yeah!" Ludwig snapped. "And in this case, it isn't a good thing."

"Like, stop anagonizing him, Love-no," Feliks sighed, flipping back his hair as he did so. "I'll like, do it."

As Feliks strutted past Lovino, the Italian's face darkened with rage.

"Does that bastard have something wrong with him?!" he spat. "I swear if he calls me Love-no one more time, I will tear out his brain and feed it to my pet piranas!"

"You don't have any pet piranas," Feliciano told him.

"I know that fratello!" Lovino snapped. "It just sounded good to say, alright!"

Alfred thought it sounded good but then, saying so aloud would probably earn him a similar threat. He decided to admire from afar.

The door of the house opened, and a brunette woman stuck her head out. She gazed around at them, her expression curious.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

Ludwig shuffled to the back of the crowd, trying to make himself look inconspicuous.

"Like, hey," Feliks greeted. "You like, have totally squeal-worthy hair, do you know that? It's like, the same shade as Liet's."

The woman looked even more confused; she stared at him, oddly.

"Who are you?" she asked.

"Who is that?" called out a male voice. A moment later a tall man joined the woman on the doorstep. He glared at them.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Like, the lady with Liet's hair already asked that," Feliks told him. "I'm like, Feliks. This is Alfred," he pointed to Alfred, "and Feliciano and Love-no."

"IT'S LOVINO!"

"...And that's Ludwig."

The expression on Ludwig's face would have been comical, if Alfred had actually managed to see it; instead he was distracted by the sudden looks of suspicion and rage on the faces of the woman and the man.

"Ludwig?" hissed the woman.

"Hello, Elizaverta," Ludwig greeted, sounding slightly shaky. "Hello Roderich."

Oh. So those were Elizaverta and Roderich. Alfred eyed them, studying the unfriendly expressions on their faces.

At the moment it really wasn't looking good for them.

"Uh." Alfred stepped forward. "I really need to speak to you about -"

Elizaverta cut him off. "What the hell are you doing here?" she demanded. "Did he send you?"

"Gilbert?" Ludwig let out an awkward laugh. "No, of course not. Gilbert hasn't even mentioned you, since...well, er, since..."

"Let's not mention it," Roderich cut him off.

"Yeah." Ludwig nodded his head, still looking awkward. "That's a good idea."

"I don't know if we can trust them," Elizaverta said, frowning slightly. "If they're linked with Gilbert -"

"We aren't!" Feliks protested. "I like, hate that guy! You know, there was this one time -"

"Shut up, bastard," Lovino cut him off. He turned to Elizaverta and Roderich. "I don't even know the bastard."

"So, what then?" Elizaverta glared at them. "If he didn't send you, why are you here?"

"Bastard wants you to give up your wedding," Lovino responded, jerking a finger in Alfred's direction. "Mind doing it, so we can be on our way?"

"Ha!" Elizaverta pointed a finger at him. "I knew it! Gilbert did send you!"

"What?!" Alfred's eyes widened. "No, he really didn't!"

Roderich glared at them. "You have some nerve," he spat, "coming here and thinking you can ruin our big day."

Alfred shook his head. "I only asked -"

Elizaverta climbed down the front steps and marched towards him, her expression thunderous.

"Just go away!" she spat. "I don't feel like associating myself with the likes of anyone who associates themselves with Gilbert."

"Like, that's totally discrimination," Feliks told her.

"I know martial arts," Elizaverta shot back.

Feliks let out a burst of laughter. "Like, yeah right!" he snorted. "Like, you know -"

Elizaverta slammed her foot in his groin.

"Dude!" Alfred's eyes widened in shock. "Calm down! We aren't asking for trouble - we only want to talk to you about the possibility of you postponing your wedding day -"

Elizaverta turned to stare at him and glared, threateningly.

"She's a black-belt," Roderich told them, sounding extremely proud.

"I never signed up for this!" Lovino howled. "What the hell is going on?!"

He glanced down and his eyes widened.

"FRATELLO - WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO RIP MY SHIRT OFF?!"

Alfred glanced over, looking overly-eager.

"I need to make a white flag!" Feliciano wailed, still tugging on Lovino's shirt. "This is the only white thing I can see!"

"Like, what the hell are you psycho's on?!" Feliks, clutching his groin tightly, glared up at Elizaverta, his eyes screwed up with pain.

"Potato Bastard!" Lovino howled. "Tell them we mean no harm!"

Feliciano made a frustrated noise. "If you just give me your shirt fratello, I could show them!"

'Please give him your shirt, Lovino...' Alfred thought.

...

Eventually Alfred managed to get his story out, once things had calmed down.

"So, you're saying," Roderich said, peering over his cup of tea, "that you would like us to postpone our wedding day."

"...Yes." Alfred stared at him, hopefully.

"Because you cancelled your brothers wedding reservation?" Roderich took a sip from his cup of tea, and raised one eyebrow.

"Accidentally," Alfred interjected. "...And, yes."

"Hmm..." Roderich thought for a moment. "No."

"That's like, totally not squeal-worthy," Feliks told him, his eyes narrowed. "You can't like, ruin a wedding like that!"

"You are telling us to give up our wedding for the sake of someone we don't even know," Roderich snorted.

Ludwig tried to speak. "Look -"

Roderich cut him off. "I have no desire to hear anything from the mouth of Gilbert's brother."

"I think I like this guy," Lovino muttered.

"Oh, Roderich," sighed Elizaverta, walking over. "They look so pathetic..."

"Yes," Roderich agreed, "they do."

"Fine!" Alfred cried. "We look pathetic - we are pathetic!"

"Hey!" Lovino snapped.

"Like, take one for the team, Love-no," Feliks piped up.

"For the last time -"

"But," ignoring his friends, Alfred continued to speak. "We will do anything to get that reservation back. Anything."

"I hear you have strange fetishes," Feliciano said, smiling slightly.

"Fratello!" Lovino snapped, his expression darkening.

"Look," this time, it was Ludwig who spoke. "I know you really don't like me much - considering what my brother did, I sort of understand. But...Matthew has been looking forward to his wedding for a while. So...isn't there anything we could do?"

"No," Roderich replied.

"Oh this is just ridiculous," Lovino groaned. "If the bastards say no, what the fuck are we supposed to do about it? Hold them down and force them to hand it over?"

"Like, don't say that here," Feliks hissed. "Remember what Ludwig told us? And I don't like, want to get my man-bits chopped off!"

"...I'm going to get my man-bits chopped off," Alfred whimpered.

'Before Lovino even got to see them,' he thought, mournfully.

"This is almost cute," Elizaverta snickered. "You boys, you're so pathetic. You'd really do anything for that reservation?"

Alfred sat up straighter and nodded his head, quickly.

"I like, spoke to the careers councilor this one time," Feliks said. "She like, told me I'd make a good stripper."

Elizaverta laughed. "Tempting," she told him. "But...no. I think I might have something for you."

"Wait." Lovino sounded suspicious. "You're telling me there's something we could do...that would make you give us your wedding reservation?"

Elizaverta nodded her head.

"...I'm out of here."

"Fratello, wait!" Feliciano grabbed onto his brother, to prevent him from walking away. "Where are you going?"

"I'm not going to jail!" Lovino snapped. "Have you heard about the things that go on in there?!"

"Oh calm down," Elizaverta laughed. "I'm not going to ask you to do anything illegal."

"Elizaverta." Roderich narrowed his eyes at her. "What are you on about? There is nothing they can do -"

"Roderich." Elizaverta cut him off. "Remember that place...that we originally wanted to have the wedding?"

Roderich stared at her for a moment. "...There is no way we can have it there."

Elizaverta shrugged. "Who knows."

"The priest said -"

"Like, excuse me," Feliks cut in. "Mind like, telling us what's going on?"

Elizaverta turned to face them. "We originally wanted to have our wedding in the church in this town - it's where I've always wanted to get married." She smiled, dreamily.

"Wow," Lovino muttered. "You really don't have many life ambitions."

Ludwig shot him a warning look.

"But, uh..." she hesitated for a moment. "There was a bit of an...incident. With Roderich...and the priest..."

There was an awkward pause.

"Uh..." Alfred coughed.

"Not like that," Roderich snapped, looking embarrassed.

"No, of course not," Elizaverta laughed. "Any sexual encounters were between Roderich and the priests younger sister."

"Excuse me, woman!" Roderich snarled. "It was not like that!"

"Well it would have been," Elizaverta argued. "If Father Zwingli hadn't walked in on you two."

Alfred watched the two, studying Elizaverta's expression and the tone of her voice. Despite the fact that she was speaking about past sexual rendezvous of her husband-to-be's, she didn't seem particularly annoyed.

"Father Zwingli is being completely unreasonable," Roderich grumbled. "It was one time - nothing happened - and because of this, he refuses to marry us. Completely ridiculous."

"I heard it was scandalous," Elizaverta laughed.

"So, what?" Hope was once again starting to blossom within Alfred. "You just want us to convince the guy to marry you at the church? Then you'll give us the reservation back?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Alfred," Ludwig sighed. "Your brother is getting married the day after tomorrow. How do you expect to do all of this before then?"

"Oh, shut up, Potato Bastard," Lovino groused. "How hard can it be? All we have to do is convince that Zwingli-bastard to marry those idiots."

"I doubt they can do it," Roderich snorted. "That man is a maniac."

"Like, so is Love-no," Feliks responded. "I think we can like, manage just fine."

"We can do it!" Feliciano chirped, a smile spreading across his face. "Anything to make things happy again!"

Alfred nodded his head rapidly. "Yeah," he said. "We'll do it."

Ludwig, still looking unsure, simply shrugged his shoulders.

"Excellent!" Elizaverta beamed, widely.

"Fine," Roderich snapped. "You have until tomorrow to get it done - if not, you lose. Understand?"

"I don't think we're going to need two days to convince the guy," Alfred said.

Roderich snorted. "If you think that, then you have no hope."

...

Review, please :)