A/N: My university had an organization called Queers & Allies that I never participated in other than the one time a friend invited me to an event, so I just kinda made this up as I went. I was not a very involved student, and I thought I was straight until a few years into college anyway. It's never too late to have life-altering realizations about yourself! But that's a story for another day~

Also I just kinda threw the end of chapter together, so sorry if the transition is a bit jarring. I didn't know what I wanted to do with this chapter so I made something up at the last minute.

Anyway, Yuuri is a self-insert, i.e. the first several paragraphs are just me projecting. Not that I'm definitely-not-dating anyone, but the rest of it. I'm a wimp


The worst part about not being straight was the fact that you were always, always coming out to people.

Yuuri's anxiety did him no favors here, making him more nervous with each new person who found out. A part of him was afraid that even if he just looked things up online on his own computer, someone would somehow know and he'd have to try to explain the complicated mess of feelings in his heart. But if he was going to be with Viktor someday, people would know. Dating a man was a pretty clear signal that he was, at the very least, not straight.

Viktor was a prime example of someone who had no qualms letting people know who he was, so Yuuri decided to take after his example and get to know the campus community. That's why he'd spontaneously asked Viktor to take him to a Queers & Allies meeting. It seemed like the best way to ease into it; after all, nobody would question if he was there for himself or as an ally until he was ready to volunteer the information. But now that the day was actually here, it felt like he was about to come out to a room of strangers.

The Wednesday during welcome week, Yuuri, Chris, and Viktor headed to campus together, and Yuuri was in jitters. Viktor held his hand on the bus, rubbing the back of Yuuri's hand with his thumb in a soothing motion, but his stomach was still doing flips when the three of them entered the meeting room.

"Chris!" exclaimed someone at the front of the room. "Nice of you to join us. Chris is our treasurer, for those who weren't around when we announced leadership last year," he added toward the rest of the room.

Oops. Apparently they were late. The classroom was small and the seats were already filled, so Yuuri and Viktor stood along the wall at the back while Chris went up to join his fellow board members.

"Anyway," the person continued, apparently the club president, "as we discussed on the Facebook page, Emil and I will be the ones manning the table, but last year's seniors took all the materials we had for last year's setup, so as it is now, our table will be very boring. We voted in the poll that we wanted to do something fun anyway, which is why we need all your help. Did everyone bring their ideas for attracting new members?"

The room responded with a quiet chorus of agreements.

"All right, we'll go around the room. Ken, why don't you write down all the ideas on the white board so we can vote on them afterward?"

"Got it!" A short blonde boy shot out of his seat and grabbed a marker at the front, and Yuuri was startled to realize that it was someone he knew. Minami Kenjirou was in this club, too? Were all his friends LGBT+ in some form or another?

Minami was a year younger than Yuuri, and also an international student from Japan, so Yuuri had been sort of a mentor figure when Minami first arrived on campus for his freshman year. They hadn't really talked in a while, but apparently the little ball of nervous energy Yuuri knew as a young sophomore had managed to become a club secretary. Yuuri was kind of proud.

He was even more proud when someone suggested they bring in students by highlighting Minami's published poetry. Published! In a journal! Minami was coerced into reading it for those in the room who hadn't heard the good news yet, and Yuuri had to agree that it was a good poem. Once the meeting was over, he beelined for Minami to offer his greetings.

"Yuuri-kun! I didn't expect to see you here!" Minami said, eyes lighting up when Yuuri approached him.

Yuuri smiled warmly at Minami. "I didn't expect to see you either. Your poetry was beautiful. Congratulations."

Minami's eyes widened. "Really? You really think so? Wow, that means a lot! Wow. This is the best day of my life."

Yuuri laughed. "You got into a literary magazine; I think that's a higher honor than my amateur opinion."

"Your poetry in last year's lit class was so good though," Minami said.

Yuuri flushed just remembering it. That had been so embarrassing. "We don't speak of that semester," he said.

"But Yuuri-kun~"

"Nope. Nope. It was terrible and embarrassing. Never doing that again."

"Yuuri wrote poetry?" Viktor said, appearing out of nowhere over Yuuri's shoulder.

Yuuri jumped in surprise. "Jeez. Uh. Not because I wanted to. We had to for a class. And it wasn't that good; I got a C. He's just exaggerating."

"That professor didn't know what talent looks like," Minami said.

"He's a professor."

"I'm sure it's better than anything I could've done," Viktor said, smiling benignly. "Kenjirou, congratulations, by the way."

"Thank you!"

"I wonder if we should put together a poetry reading somewhere as an event this year. Spoken word poetry is trendy these days," Viktor said, index finger tapping his lips.

Minami put up his hand and grinned sheepishly. "I already submitted that as a suggestion," he admitted.

"Good thinking!"

Minami turned to Yuuri. "Will you be coming to this club now? You never came to any meetings last year. Are you interested?"

Yuuri fidgeted with his hands. "Yeah. I'll try to come by sometimes. I don't know very much about these things, but I'd like to."

"Hey, everyone's welcome," Viktor said, putting a hand on Yuuri's shoulder.

Yuuri stiffened self-consciously. He was used to Viktor's high-contact habits at home, but being in public made him nervous. Would it be rude to shrug his hand off?

Viktor lifted his hand quickly as if sensing Yuuri's discomfort. "Anyway, should be an interesting year."

"You'll be too busy to enjoy any of it, though," Chris said, a couple other people Yuuri didn't know following him over to join the conversation. Chris leaned heavily on Yuuri, making him stumble. "Can't believe we have to deal with your influence in student government for another year. You're not even elected."

Viktor flashed a grin. "What can I say? My cabinet was top-notch. They already don't know what to do without me." He eyed the way Chris had his arms draped over Yuuri's shoulders after he'd only just removed his hand. "Feeling cuddly today, Chris?"

Chris smirked. "Just proud of my shy little Yuuri for making it today. He needs some extracurriculars."

Yuuri tried to gently push Chris off. "I'm not sure I'll be involved enough to count as a member," he said.

"Why not?" Minami said, pouting.

"Ah…uh…"

One of the unfamiliar people peered around Chris to look at Yuuri. "'Your' Yuuri? Chris, you brought your boyfriend?"

The blush rose to Yuuri's cheeks instantly.

"Oh yeah, you two are living together."

Yuuri glanced at Chris in a panic. "Ah…no…that…"

Chris winked. "Yuuri, don't be shy."

"Chris, you're not helping!"

But it was too late. Chris's misleading comment had already gotten his friends all excited.

"Chris did say he was gonna hold off on dating for a little while."

"Come on, Chris, don't hog the new kid all to yourself."

"So this is your rumored roommate, huh?"

"Good luck with him. He's a handful," someone told Yuuri.

Yuuri started, "We're not…"

"We're not like that," Chris finally said. "I'm just teasing him. But any more of this and we might scare him off. We don't want that, do we?"

"Yuuri-kun, don't mind it; they like to bother Chris," Minami said.

But Yuuri did mind it. He minded because somewhere in the middle of that teasing, Viktor had vanished. Yuuri had been too distracted by his embarrassment to notice when, but suddenly Viktor wasn't in the room. Where had he disappeared to so quickly?

"Sorry about that," one of Chris's friends said, a tall brunette with shockingly blue eyes and warm complexion. "Yuuri, was it? I'm Sara."

"Nice to meet you," Yuuri murmured.

From there, the conversation turned to the much safer territory of majors and school life, topics Yuuri was very familiar with after dealing with them for two full years already. This was a script he could follow. But Viktor didn't reappear, and the absence nagged him in the back of his mind.


After the socializing subsided and the last people drifted from the meeting room, Yuuri still didn't know where Viktor was. Chris had to make a library run, so Yuuri was left going home alone.

"He probably had something urgent to do," Chris said in regards to Viktor's disappearance. "You know how he is. People won't leave him alone."

But Yuuri didn't think that was the case this time, so he texted Viktor asking where he was. The reply was instant.

Viktor:
Cafe downstairs

Yuuri:
Meeting's over. Are you going home?

No response. The little chat bubble indicated tried typing something, but it disappeared just as quickly.

Well, the easiest way to talk was in-person anyway, and the café Viktor mentioned was truly right downstairs, through a small stairwell down the hall. Yuuri headed down it, and was about to reach for the exit door when it swung open and nearly hit him in the face. He stopped, surprised, and so did Viktor.

Viktor grinned half-heartedly, letting the door close behind him. "Good thing I came this way. We could've missed each other."

Yuuri was suddenly tongue-tied, not sure if he should ask Viktor if everything was all right, or apologize, or get annoyed, or pretend nothing was bothering him. As the heavy silence dragged on, Viktor's smile faded and his true feelings showed through; he was troubled. Yuuri's heart dropped to his stomach.

Viktor pulled Yuuri to the side, glancing at the door to make sure they were out of the way for anyone else who decided to come through this stairwell. He turned back to Yuuri. He was frowning.

"I'm sorry," Yuuri blurted before Viktor could even open his mouth.

Viktor paused, a little surprised, then relaxed into a smile. "No, I should be the one to apologize for leaving you to fend for yourself. Teasing Chris is like a hobby for them, and they can get carried away. Was it fine after that? If you stayed that long, I suppose it was."

Yuuri nodded. "They were nice to talk to. Chris set them straight pretty quick and they apologized for teasing."

"I heard that part from the hallway," Viktor said. He stepped forward and placed a hand on either side of Yuuri's waist, slowly drawing him into his arms. "Hey, don't look like that. I'm upset at myself, not you."

Yuuri fisted Viktor's shirt, still feeling small. "Why?"

"I couldn't say anything. If I spoke, I felt like the whole truth would come spilling out, and I didn't want to put even more attention on you. But for a moment, that was all I could think about, so I left before I lost control." He snuggled his face into the side of Yuuri's head. "I'm sorry. It's stupid, I know."

"It's not stupid," Yuuri said. "I've blurted things out without meaning to before. It happens."

"Like when you said you liked me." Yuuri could hear the smile in Viktor's voice. He just loved teasing, didn't he? And it worked every time; Yuuri immediately blushed.

"Yeah. Like that."

"But see, that was a positive thing. It made me happy. I'm the opposite of you; I never say good things, but when it's something that could hurt someone, that's when it becomes hard to hold my tongue. I hate that about myself." Viktor said all this with a sigh, and something in Yuuri's stomach twisted. Yuuri was supposed to be the awkward, self-depreciating one. Viktor was a pillar of strength in comparison.

But even Viktor had his weaknesses and insecurities. Yuuri did know that. He knew the ones regarding Yurio, but this was his first time hearing Viktor mention hating himself. It was jarring, unexpected, and it made his heart ache.

Feeling a sudden rush of emotion, Yuuri flung his arms around Viktor's neck and held him tight.

"Even though it's hard and my anxiety is not logical, you work so hard to make sure I'm okay. You push me when I need to be pushed, and protect me when I need space. I like that about you."

Viktor let out a little whine and squeezed Yuuri tighter. They held each other so tight that Yuuri could feel Viktor's heartbeat against his own. Or, wait— which heartbeat was his again? No matter.

A sigh echoed in Viktor's chest. "I suppose everyone still thinks you're Chris's roommate."

"Yeah. I'm not sure how to correct them. I was going to but the conversation moved on too fast."

"I'm still mad at Chris for that. Now it's even more awkward to bring up. Ah, not that I'd tell people about your living situation without your permission, but even if you did want to talk about it…"

"It's awkward," Yuuri agreed.

Another sigh. "I don't suppose we can just stay like this for the rest of the day."

Yuuri laughed. He was comfortable now, but his feet were sure to get tired eventually. He slowly extracted himself from Viktor's embrace.

"Let's go home," he said.

Viktor held Yuuri back by toying with his fingers, his lips turned down in a pout. "I want to hold hands," he said.

Yuuri squeezed Viktor's fingers back. "You know we can't. It will cause problems for Yakov's class if people think you're biased."

"I know. I already get more than enough people in my office hours complaining about grades. And I don't want to put you in a tough spot either. But…"

"Next semester, maybe don't sign yourself up to TA for my section of a class, okay?"

Viktor pouted harder. But as Yuuri pushed the door open, he dutifully let their hands drop. Since they were already talking about the class, Yuuri asked about the roster to see if he knew anyone else, and the conversation moved on from there as they made their way back home side by side.

"So," Viktor said on the bus ride back to the apartment, "what did you think about the club?"

"They do a lot," Yuuri said simply. He knew some of their more publicized events because his friends would attend them, but they seemed to have stuff going on constantly. Classes hadn't even started yet, and they already had plans for a whole slew of events throughout September.

"Most of the events are pretty casual; they're just opportunities to hang out and talk with other queer folks. Things like the movie nights are for everybody. The next general meeting will be for new members. They'll probably do ice breakers and all that, like they do every year."

"Oh no. I'm awful at ice breakers."

"Should I break the ice for you? 'This is my dear friend Yuuri, he is a junior linguistics major, and a fun fact about him is that he is amazing and wonderful.'"

"I'm not sure that's how it works, Viktor."

"It's not? Damn."

Yuuri giggled. Viktor had a way of turning everything into a means of complimenting Yuuri. It was silly, but it made his heart feel light every time. Viktor put so much energy into lifting Yuuri up that he couldn't help but fall for it, no matter how transparent the ploy.

"I'm in your class, your apartment, your club…what will you drag me into next?" Yuuri teased.

"Yurio's ice show next weekend?"

"I'm already going to that!"

"Yes, escorted by moi," Viktor said.

"Oh, no, you're just my ride. I'm only there for Yurio."

"So cruel, Yuuri! Is that all I am to you? A chauffer?"

Yuuri blinked. "What else is there?"

Viktor draped himself over Yuuri, making exaggerated weeping noises into his shoulder as Yuuri giggled. They ran with the joke all the way until they got home, at which point it was forgotten in favor of marathoning a cooking show together until it was time to pick up Yurio.

Yurio actually had a small routine put together for the performance his summer skating class put on for parents at the end of the class. Yuuri had seen part of it last time he brought Yurio to practice, and it was actually kind of amazing that someone so young could skate so well. Yurio always said his goal was to become a figure skater, but with his additional lessons recently, it was starting to look possible. His coach even agreed that Yurio was a quick learner and a strong skater for his age.

The class recital was next weekend, and Yuuri couldn't wait to see the whole thing. Viktor had mentioned it earlier, and now that Yuuri was thinking about it, he was excited to see what Yurio had in store.


Yuuri Katsuki added a new video
5 minutes ago

Out supporting my youngest roommate at his end-of-summer ice skating recital today! He's gotten so good! Olympic athlete in the making!

7 comments
Mila Babicheva Wait weren't you living with Chris?
Yuuri Katsuki He was just joking around -_- I've been staying with Viktor since last semester
Mila Babicheva Christophe Giacometti EXPLAIN YOURSELF
Christophe Giacometti Gotcha ;)
Mila Babicheva Asshole
Viktor Nikiforov Please don't argue on cute posts of Yurio. I'm trying to enjoy this AMAZING WONDERFUL video of a
FUTURE WORLD CLASS ATHLETE in peace ToT
Phichit Chulanont This is so cute!

Yuuri turned to Viktor. "Well, that takes care of that," he said.

Viktor wasn't listening. Too busy watching the video of the routine he'd just seen not that long ago. They were still on the bus and had several more stops to go; he couldn't even wait until he got home? Watching videos on the bus had to be using a ton of data. He could watch it as much as he wanted when they were home and back on wifi, but apparently it couldn't wait.

Yuuri looked down toward his other side instead. "Your brother might have a bit of a brother complex," he said to Yurio.

"What does that mean?"

"It means he loves you so much that he's a little obsessed sometimes."

"Oh. Well, that's true. He keeps my old socks."

"…your socks?"

"He's got little ones from when I was a baby. They're really little. He says it's a record of my growth, or something. He already said that he's gonna add my tiger socks to his collection when they get too old, since they're my favorites."

"That's actually kind of cute," Yuuri said.

"It's annoying." Yurio crossed is arms and huffed. Then, in a smaller voice: "I don't hate it though."

"What don't you hate?" Viktor apparently picked that point in the conversation to start listening again.

"I wasn't talking about you," Yurio snapped. He leaned back in the seat so he wasn't in Viktor's line of vision, Yuuri's body separating them, and Yuuri could see that he was blushing. Cute. Really cute.

Viktor whined into Yuuri's shoulder. "Yuuri~ I think my brother likes you more than he likes me."

Yuuri stifled a snicker.

"Don't laugh at me!"

Yuuri laughed anyway. "You're cute," he said.

"'re cuter," Viktor mumbled, pulling away.

Now both Russian brothers were blushing. Really, really, really cute.


A/N: Chris, you meant well, but maybe don't invent blatant lies about other people's lives next time? At least they found a subtle way to clear that up