Hopefully these two chapters at once make up for the shortness.
Crimson Tears and Slit Wrists
ch. 7
The Virus Called Life
Pain... Unberable red hot pain. It coursed through his veins, in every cell, in every organ, in his skin, on his skin, everywhere. So much that one could die from the agony, but he did not. He was alive. Izuru Kira, fukutaichou to the 3rd divison, was still alive. And oh how he despised it! Why couldn't death be merciful? He'd tried so hard.... gave up everything.... said good-bye with that final blow.... he though for sure that then had been the last time he'd ever see his own blood..... that that would be the last time his eyes would be opened and closed.... However, he had opened his eyes again. Blinked in the confusion all have when awakening in a different setting. Then cried out in the greatest despair known to a dying man. Tears over flowed from his anguish filled eyes, falling down pale cold cheeks. Hiperventalating was near impossible with that damn tube down his throat. Despite that fact, his body reacted in doing so, causing chocking pain to swell up from deep within.
'Wh-Why?! Why am I still alive? This can't be! This just can't be!! Ichimaru.... he saw what I did, I know it..... No, no, no.... I can't face him. Not now not ever! I can't go on...' His panic caused medics to rush in and have him forceablly restrained. They strapped him down to bed by his wrists, forearms, ankles, knees, stomace, chest, and even neck. By the time they were done, he couldn't move no matter how hard he tried. The realisation broke the final form of sanity he had. There was nothing more. There was no Izuru Kira. What laid helplessly in that bed was no longer the calm fukutaichou of the 3rd divison. That person was gone the moment that very first cut was placed upon his wrist. The person who was here was someone unknown, someone who can not be helped. Beside him, a dark haired medic looked at him sadly as he injected something into arm that made him numb. Then he blacked out once again.
Back in the waiting room, Gin was beyond anxious. He had been sitting in that room the entire night to noon. Twice Unohana's fukutaichou had checked up on him and had advised him to go home. She had asured him that Kira was stable enough to be considered in the grey and that they had everything under control. But it wasn't enough for him. He needed to be able to see him. To know that he was going to make it without a doubt. To hold his hand and feel warmth. To talk to him. Yes, talk to him! He had to know why he wanted to die so much. He had to hear the reasons, no matter how much it would pain him to actually hear them, and finally not be left out in the dark. But more than anything he just had to hear from Izuru himself. This can't go on. The constant switching between fine, then suicidal, to fine by physical standards, to almost completed suicide. It was madness!
Another hour passed.... another stressful hour passed before a dark haired medic entered the room, giving him a useless uneasy smile. "Um, I-Ichimaru-ta-taichou.... you may c-come see him now." He didn't need to say more for Gin to jump up and be utterly ready to follow him. The boy lead him down a couple of hallways to hault at a door near to the end. "He's i-in here... Ca-Captain Unohana wante-ed me to warn you that h-h-he shouldn't be awakened yet. Not u-until he's come around by himself." Gin nodded, understanding fully and wanting to see his little Kira as soon as possible. The boy opened the door, but timidly grabbed ahold of the fox's sleeve. "Uh, sorry, Captain, but.... she a-also wanted me to te-ell you that when he does wake up, call for us immeditaly."
From the apologic / concerned look, Gin knew that this boy meant that Izuru would need to be sedated. It made sense. Knowing how he's been lately, he would most likely go into a panic state. His heart wouldn't be able to take the strain, especially from the damage its already endured. As Ichimaru entered the room, the first sight was the last sight he wanted to see. Izuru was strapped down to the bed like he was a threat. So many needles, wires, and tubes were in him. Gin had to repeat to himself that all this was needed, that it could help Izuru in the long run. So with a deep breath and a final nod to the medic who closed the door, he went to the chair beside Izuru's bed. He merely stared for the longest time, listening to the heart monitor and the breathing device. Kira was pale. Paler than he has ever been. His hair was a mess and his face.... it was as if the pain he felt on the inside was etched on his face. Gin wondered what his skin felt like if he looked this bad. He gently took ahold of his hand in his. Just as he figured.... ice cold. But at least there was a pulse running faintly in that wrist.
"Izuru...."
As if just speaking his name was enough, Izuru stirred slightly, slowly yet surely coming back into conciousness. Gin snapped to attention, staring intently at the blonde.
"Izuru?"
So, will Izuru freak out? You be the judge. Lets see how ya think things will go down.
