A/N: Let the angst begin. However, there's fluff in here too. :D
The physical therapy went well. Rose took several steps with no support and made it all the way to the Torchwood common area with the Doctor's help. If he's honest, the close contact and constant touching that the therapy required had his more easily excited bits, well, excited, causing him to maneuver himself in such a way that nobody would notice.
"I'm not tired," Rose complained at his insistence that she get some form of rest, since she had been needing quite a bit of sleep lately and the physical therapy had probably exhausted her.
The Doctor sighed reluctantly. "Alright, then. What do you want to do?"
She gave him that brilliant smile, the one that made his hearts melt and beat faster, the one that fueled his optimism since she had gotten back to him. "A movie?"
"Rooose," he complained. "We are most definitely not having you walk all the way to the TARDIS media room only to have you pass out on the couch a second later."
Rose rolled her eyes. "Bet I won't fall asleep as fast as you."
He puffed out his chest, indignant. "You're on. But I pick the movie."
"No, I do," she claimed, giving him a teasing smile.
They made it to the media room in far more time than it should have taken, due to getting sidetracked constantly and teasing and flirting and the likes.
Rose ended up picking The Hunchback of Notre Dame for their movie, insisting that she needed to watch a Disney classic. The Doctor fetched popcorn in record time, making it back to her side and handing her the bowl. Halfway through the movie, without warning, she tugged him down onto his side and lay in front of him. His arm instinctively moved around her stomach and his nose nuzzled carelessly into her hair, not bringing himself to care that he couldn't see the television at all.
Everything went great until Quasimodo helped Esmeralda escape.
Rose darted upwards, suddenly, and coughed into her elbow. The Doctor watched her in concern as her coughs didn't subside and a small fit turned into a moderate fit, which in turn amplified into a bigger fit. The sounds grew and grew until it sounded as though she could hardly breathe.
He sat up next to her and, without hesitation, scooped her up into his arms. He stood up and began walking as fast as he could towards the door when he felt her hitting his shoulder, still coughing slightly.
His hearts had been beating at a thousand miles per hour, his head clear of all coherent thoughts as he focused in on one goal: getting her to the medical bay now.
There was an indescribable gaping feeling in his stomach, as if someone had ripped a hole in him and there was no way to repair it. It was almost as if he was a ghost, not really there and this wasn't really happening, it was just a bad dream that he would wake up from.
"Doctor stop," Rose insisted. "I'm fine. Just choked on a piece of popcorn."
He didn't listen. He continued towards the medical bay and laid her down on the bed. Rose stood up immediately and stared at him with her arms folded across her chest. "Rose, let me run an x-ray at least," he pleaded. "Just an x-ray. It'll take moment, just a moment. Ten seconds."
She rolled her eyes. "I knew you wouldn't be able to trust me." She scanned his concerned face. "Calm down! You're overreacting, I just choked on popcorn! I'm fine, see?"
He saw fear in her eyes and he couldn't take this for another second. "I'm overreacting? No, you're underreacting. You just got out of a coma, Rose!"
"Why do you have to keep reminding me of that?!" she shouted. He saw tears forming in her eyes. "Why can't we just pick up where we left off? It doesn't matter that I just got out of a coma!"
The Doctor groaned and began pacing the room in frustration. "Of course it matters! This is life or death, Rose."
"I'm a Time Lady," she complained. "I can regenerate. There really aren't life or death situations for me anymore."
"Yeah, you know what, you are a Time Lady," he spat angrily, stepping up to her where she sat with her ankles crossed on the medical bed. Such a casual position for such an unusual situation, he thought bitterly. His old Rose would have never done this. She would have talked to him, explained to him what was going on, and they sure as Rassilon would have worked it out by now.
He continued, "You're a Time Lady, and you're definitely not Rose Tyler. You've been acting different ever since you've gotten here. Why won't you tell me what happened, Rose? Why won't you talk to me? You used to talk to me. Answer some questions."
He regretted the words the moment they came out of his mouth. He saw the first tear stream down Rose's cheek and she stood up, her accent growing thicker as she grew angrier and a lump formed in her throat. "Maybe you're not the same man I knew," she accused. "What happened to you, Doctor? I thought you used to..."
She didn't complete her sentence but he knew what she had been about to say anyways, and it hurt him more unsaid than said.
He held his tongue and lowered his voice to a firm one. "Rose, please, lay down and let me scan you."
"No."
He groaned in frustration, moving his hands away from his hair in fear that he would pull it all out in irritation. Then, making a split second decision, he whipped his sonic screwdriver out of his pocket and attempted to examine her with it, hovering it over her body. Her hand darted out and grabbed his wrist before he could activate it.
"Rose," he begged, not fighting her grip even though he could easily break out.
She took in a deep breath. "Doctor, put the screwdriver in your pocket."
He did as she asked hesitantly. "Can you tell me? Just tell me, Rose." He took a look at her, a real look at her, and saw the fear evident in her features. Her hands were trembling slightly and tears were now streaming down her face. "I can tell that you want to," he mumbled, placing two fingers under her chin.
She stepped away from his touch. "There's nothing to tell."
"Did something affect your mind?" he asked slowly. "Is something forcing you to say this?"
Rose's lips were set in a form line and she shook her head. "It's me, Doctor. Genuinely me. Please, can we just pick up where we left off?" He didn't respond, so she took a step towards him experimentally and reached out, wiggling her fingers. "You know," she encouraged, "Sir Doctor of TARDIS and Dame Rose of the Powell Estate? The old team?"
He still didn't reply so her voice lowered to a whisper, her hand slowly withdrawing. "The stuff of legends?"
The Doctor considered her, his eyes searching hers for any sign of evidence. He knew he wouldn't last forever with this uncertainty. But he wasn't quite sure what choice he had. Perhaps if he could spend more time with her, study her, he could figure out who or what was messing around with her brain.
Or what was scaring her so much she was lying to him.
Or, perhaps, she was telling the truth. Maybe everything was all right and she just really, really didn't want to bother with tests? No, that wasn't true. There was something going on. He'd just have to figure it out without her help. For some reason, that particular thought sent goose bumps down his arms.
The Doctor grabbed her hand in his and squeezed it, offering a small, forced smile. "Yeah. The stuff of legends."
Rose beamed brightly and pulled him into a hug. "When do you think we can go somewhere?" She pulled away but kept his hand in hers, toying with his fingers absentmindedly. "I'm dying to travel."
"We'll go when you're healed up," he promised. He was ready to leave Torchwood, more than ready, if he was honest. He liked Donna, Martha, Jack, and the others; he just wasn't built to stay in one place – pure and simple. "Which shouldn't be long."
"Superior biology?" she asked, poking her tongue out of her teeth.
"Superior biology."
Rose tugged on his arm, leading him towards the door. "Can we finish the movie?"
He stared at her intently. "Aren't you tired by now?"
"Sort of," she admitted. "I still want to finish it, though. We were at a good part."
The Doctor shrugged, trying to act casual about his words, "You could sleep on the couch, maybe?" As stressed as he was about her condition, one thing he couldn't complain about was the cuddling. He hadn't cuddled this often in all the nine hundred years of his life, and he wasn't quite sure he ever wanted to stop. It was a somewhat embarrassing and very unmanly thought, and he made a mental note to never tell Rose that.
However, Rose seemed to be able to read his thoughts, since she gave him an amused smile. "Yeah, that sounds good."
"Thought I might find you in here," Jack said from behind the Doctor, peering down on them on the couch.
The Doctor startled, wrapping an arm around Rose for protection instinctively and staring up at Jack with wide eyes. "You scared me."
"Normally you'd hear me coming from a mile away, Doc," Jack grinned, sitting down on a chair and propping his feet up on the coffee table, legs crossed at the ankles. "Senses dulling?"
"No, just…" He stared down at Rose and made a lame explanatory hand gesture.
Jack nodded. "Distracted. Right. How's she doing?"
The Doctor wasn't quite sure how to answer that. She might be doing awful and I wouldn't know because she's not telling me anything? She could be doing amazing and be completely right to be sour with me because I've accused her of lying? She's doing great, how about you Jack? How're the kids?
Instead, he just stared down at her in concern. "She won't let me take tests."
"Still?" Jack asked, eyes shooting to his hairline.
If there was anyone he could trust, despite how much he wanted to admit it, it was Jack. "Still," he confirmed. "She says she's fine, but…" His eyes squeezed shut, trying to block out the painful memory of their fight.
"You two had a fight?" Jack guessed, making a face. "Well looks like it ended well with your current position." Jack nodded towards Rose sleeping with a small smile plastered onto her face with her bum firmly pressed up against the Doctor's pelvis.
The Doctor felt himself turning crimson and he ducked his head. "Not quite. I just can't stand not knowing what's wrong."
"Well, you can't force her," he replied with a frown. "Guess she'll tell you about Pete's World and all that in due time."
"I'm impatient," the Doctor admitted, fidgeting slightly as Rose snuggled further into him, letting out a content sigh as she wrapped an arm around him. The Doctor froze, looking at Jack helplessly.
Jack walked over and clapped the Doctor on the back carefully as to not wake Rose. "She'll be fine, I'm sure. Anyways, everyone was talking about going out for lunch today. That's why I came in here, actually. Figured I'd ask if you and Rose wanted to come with. I think it'd be good for her to get out for a while. Nothing extreme, just down the street."
The Doctor hummed, brushing a strand of hair out of Rose's face and staring at her as if asking her silently. "I think she'd like that. I don't want to wake her, though."
"We're not leaving for another two hours, it's only ten in the morning," Jack assured him. "See you then."
"See you," the Doctor replied as he heard Jack's footsteps fade away down the TARDIS's corridor.
"Five more minutes," Rose groaned, burrowing her face into something soft and warm. She clutched at the blanket with one hand, bunching it up in her fist. She heard an amused noise from above her and struggled to open her eyes and adjust to the bright light.
"Rose, that's me," the Doctor's voice said above her.
She managed to look up at him, the light still hurting her eyes. His freckled face was beaming down at her and she smiled despite herself, running a hand through her mess of blonde hair. Glancing around briefly, she could see that they were on the TARDIS's media room couch.
Right, they had been watching the Hunchback of Notre Dame. And they had had a fight.
Memories of the fight hit her hard like a baseball bat to the head and she shifted her weight before realizing why the Doctor's face was so red. She was sitting on his lap. Rose's eyes widened as she tried to crawl out of his lap and sit next to him instead, fumbling slightly in the process. "Sorry," she mumbled.
"Everyone's going down the street for lunch in an hour," he began, ignoring the awkwardness of the previous situation. He ran a hand through his hair.
His hair was longer, she noted, wondering why she hadn't taken as much notice of that before. It wasn't significantly so, of course, but the strands stuck up slightly higher. He ran his hand through his hair again and she realized he could see her staring. "Oh, uh, are you going?"
"I will if you go," he stated.
He hadn't left her side since she had gotten back for more than five minutes, and she wasn't quite sure how she felt about that. All the cuddling was amazing, of course, and he was amazing in general, but she did feel the need to get out and do something. "I'll go," she said, smiling. "I don't know if I'll be able to walk all that far, though."
"I can carry you if necessary," he offered without hesitation.
Rose imagined being on his shoulders while they walked through the streets of Cardiff and laughed a little at the image. The Doctor frowned, "What?"
"Nothing," Rose said, shaking her head. "Thank you. I, um, I should shower," she said, realizing that she hadn't showered ever since she had gotten back. Rose wrinkled up her nose, wondering why the Doctor was willing to be in such close proximity with her.
The Doctor's face paled slightly. "Are you sure you, uh, can?"
She certainly felt better than she had the day before. Rose rested her hand on his arm. "Doctor, I'm pretty sure I can shower on my own. Were you thinking about joining me?" Rose shot him a flirtatious look.
"Perchance," he said, waggling his eyebrows.
Rose laughed again and stood up on somewhat wobbly legs, grabbing at his arm for support. He was giving her a look of pure apprehension, his face pale. "Just got sea legs," she explained. "I'm fine." The look lessened slightly, but she could tell he was simply putting a mask over it. "Really, Doctor, I am."
She poked him in the stomach, "Trust, remember? I'll tell you if I don't think I can do something."
He sighed. "Right. Sorry."
He still looked nervous, so she relented. "You can wait outside the bathroom, yeah? While I shower, I mean."
The Doctor didn't respond with words, he just nodded tightly and held her hand while they walked to her bedroom together. Rose grabbed some clothes from her drawer and gave him a small smile before stepping into the bathroom. For some reason, she thought he looked rather out of place sitting on the end of her bed and wringing his hands.
She pushed that thought out of her mind and stepped into the en suite, turning the water onto a hot level and using the toilet quickly. Then, she stripped off her clothes and put them on counter before stepping under the hot water and trying not to groan in pleasure as it hit her skin.
She ran her fingers through her tangled hair – she hadn't noticed just how messy it was until now. The shower felt different, somehow. Different than it had on Pete's World or simply before she had left this universe the first time. After a moment, she decided it must be the Time Lady superior senses that the Doctor had been talking about, for she could sense each drop that hit and ran down her skin.
Experimentally, she closed her eyes and focused on listening. The shower sounded different, too. She could hear the pitter patter of individual drops if she listened hard enough. The smell was the same, perhaps a bit more extreme, but it was still just water and shampoo and soap.
When she stepped out, she wrapped a towel around herself and leaned over the sink to brush her teeth before putting on some basic makeup. As soon as she was done, she got dressed in a simple lime green jumper and a regular pair of jeans. Looking in the mirror, she felt more like herself. When she stepped out the door, the Doctor was in the same position she had left him in, looking up at her surprised - as if not expecting her to come out.
"Hello," he said after a moment, smiling.
Rose looked at his hands and saw he was holding a picture frame from her nightstand of the two of them on Woman Wept, right after she had promised him forever. She grinned and sat down next to him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I like that picture."
"So do I," he replied, bringing the silver frame closer to her so that she could see it.
They both looked happy in it, and while she had been looking at the camera the Doctor had been looking at her. There was something in his eyes there – something that she couldn't completely comprehend. She had stared at that picture, admittedly, several times before, focusing in on his expression.
"You look young in this," he pointed out.
She smiled slightly. Nobody but them probably would have noticed the age difference between the picture and what she looked like now. But, to her, it was completely evident. "Yeah, I do."
After a moment, she looked at him. "You look young, too."
He laughed a little, and it sounded bitter. "I look the same. Don't exactly age that fast."
Rose raised a hand to his face, brushing the edge of his eye with her index finger. "Maybe not fast, but you do," she mumbled quietly. "You've got crinkles that weren't there before." Her fingers moved lower to his cheek and she saw his eyes following them. "And more freckles, I think." Then his chin. "And a bit more scruff."
It moved back up his face to his hair. "Your hair is longer, too," she said, voicing her earlier thoughts.
They were so close, now. It would be so easy for her to just reach out and kiss him. They were both on a rollercoaster without a single restraint and they were clinging to the car for dear life, praying that they would make it out alive. His eyes were hooded slightly, on the verge of falling shut, and she saw his tongue dart out to wet his lips and she wasn't sure she could take this anymore.
But she couldn't do this to him.
It wasn't fair.
"Doctor," she said, adding a slight warning to her inflection. He snapped out of it immediately, leaning away from her and adjusting his tie. "Should we get going?"
"We've got a bit, but we can go meet them in the hub," he suggested, voice less enthusiastic than normal.
When he didn't reach out to grab her hand, she initiated it. He seemed somewhat thankful, giving her a small smile and a look that unintentionally let her know they were going to pretend this had never happened. She wanted to believe she was okay with that, but she wasn't.
They couldn't do this – she knew they couldn't do this. Nothing had changed; they were still just going to have to be at arm's length with one another – that was the best way.
"Oh, I forgot my sweater," she lied. He looked at her in concern as she walked the other direction down the corridor. "I'll be right back," Rose promised. "You go ahead."
As soon as she was certain he was outside of the TARDIS and she was alone in her bedroom, she grabbed a tissue from the bathroom. Rose sat on the edge of her bed and coughed forcefully, her eyes squeezing shut as pain wracked her torso and left her with a slight tremble.
When she pulled it away from her mouth, a small red speck was on the thin, white paper.
A/N: Do you guys have any predictions of what's going on with Rose? Leave me a review telling me what you thought of this chapter! :D
