Note: Italics are thoughts to the character..in this case, Ziva's

Chapter 7: A Look at Ziva

Ziva ran her hand over her flat stomach. Her hand brushed over and over her taunt abs. She closed her eyes trying to imagine a living human being under that skin of hers.

"I am not worthy of you." She whispered as she raked her hand once more over her stomach. "He is a great man. Your father. Not like mine. I am unworthy of him as well. I never told him I loved him. I am not worthy to whisper those words to him. But I promise that when we survive this. I will love you with every thing inside of me. I may not tell him but I promise to tell you often. From the moment I thought you were, I wanted you."

Ziva sat down on the soft quilted bed. She felt so tired. She glanced at her prison. Chuckling lightly, Ziva fell back onto the clean bedding. "Who has me here? Why keep me in such grand style?"

No answer as usual. Her prison consisted of a bedroom and bathroom all decorated in a very girlish pink princess style. She imagined it would be the perfect room to a girl around the age of twelve. A child not quite the little girl anymore yet not the age of a teen, who was ready to give up the girly things in life. The bed was bigger than expected for a child that age. It was a queen size bed with numerous pillows of white lace and pink satin.

Food was plenty and healthy. Ziva ate of it willingly. She knew that she now carried a child within her. She'd do her best to be a good mother even if the child was residing in her womb. She would wake to a tray of fruit, different breakfast breads such as bagels, toast, and croissants, and different types of eggs. Her drink was always a glass of orange juice and a cold glass of milk. She had hoped to catch the person delivering the tray. However, the one morning she awoke to the sound of the tray being delivered, she was too late. Lunch and Dinner were always served the same way. She'd go to shower or to the bathroom. The door would be locked as she did. She'd come out when it was opened to a tray of food.

Ziva knew the Mossad officer in her had to be able to hear the person entertaining. Therefore, Ziva deduced that she was drugged some way to sleep when food was delivered for breakfast. Because of the great care taken of her, she assumed the drug would not effect her baby. Lunch and dinner was at different times due to when the person or persons keeping her had her locked in the bathroom.

Ziva felt calm but caged. She had searched the room trying to find a way out. Although the room looked peaceful, beneath the flower papered walls was cinderblock and behind the pink frilly curtains was a window with bars that looked out over nothingness.

Ziva curled into a ball on the bed glancing through the reading material placed on the night stand. She noted that some books were about parent hood, early pregnancy, and family. This was the only thing that frightened Ziva. Whoever had her knew she was carrying a child. Instinct told her that her captive wasn't really after her but the child within her womb.

How they knew was the mystery. Because Ziva herself had only discovered she was with child the morning of her capture. Tony didn't even know.

Ziva never felt worthy of Anthony Dinozzo since the day returning from Somalia. She had fought her feelings for him because of that. Yes. They had been lovers for a long time. However, Ziva had always broken up the relationship when she felt they were getting too close. He deserved so much more than damaged goods. If it was not for her jealousy, she would think that E.J. deserved him more than her.

Tony had claimed it was a game put together by him and Gibbs. Gibbs had pulled a Jenny on him. Get close to E.J. to see what was happening with her and Vance. Tony accepted the job without hesitation. He was interested but not enthralled. He was enthralled with Ziva David. If only Ziva realized she was worthy of his enchantment with her.

She loved Tony with the very core of her being. That was never the problem in the relationship they shared. It was always her feelings of unworthiness of him. So many questions had played in her head of why it couldn't be until she deemed herself a nothing wanting a somebody worthy of much more than her. One question almost deafened her at times. How could he love her when she treated him so badly in Israel?

She had asked him once something similar to that question.

"Why do you want me at all when I pulled a gun on you?"

Tony only laughed at Ziva as he rolled her to her back. He stared into her eyes and stated matter of fact. "You didn't even have your finger on the trigger."

She had found a couple of cameras when she searched the room. They couldn't be removed. She didn't try too hard to destroy them. After all, when and not IF Tony found her, the evidence of her capture would be on tape.

"I miss him." She had pleaded loudly once to the camera. Ziva was missing Tony as well as his body at night. He had became her needed habit. Her beg became a whisper. "I need him."

The only thing that kept her going was the memories that she allowed to play in her head of Tony and her together. One of her fondest memories was their first kiss. Not the kiss shared during undercover work but their first real kiss.

"Come in, Tony." Ziva opened the door to her apartment. "What movie do you have for us tonight?"

Tony held up the DVD. "Smokey and the Bandit."

"Okay." Ziva had enjoyed their nights together. Tony was now her new boss. Gibbs had left the team. However, Tony came to her home one night asking her to watch a movie with him. It became a regular thing.

They laughed at the ridiculous movie. Ziva had stated Tony should grow a mustache. He agreed if she would make love to him with a cowboy hat on. It was fun and refreshing.

Then they halted the laughing with an intense stare. Before either knew it, they had bridged the gap between them and kissed. It was a slow and passionate kiss not at all furious as they kissed while under cover. It was a kiss of intense tasting and longing. Taking their time in that kiss to explore one another's mouth while exploring new territory as more than partners and more than friends. Even more than a new boss and his new Mossad agent. It was a bridge being crossed into becoming future lovers.

That is exactly what would have happened at that time if Eli David had not been spying on them. Instead, their nights had only made it to intense make outs that both knew would lead to more. Yet they waited on that level in their relationship to savor what they had going on at the time. They wanted it to last as long as possible. Not jumping into sex was their way of saying they appreciated what they had started and were willing to wait to make it last.

Ziva had put a stop to the almost affair when it was revealed that Eli was watching her. So she told Tony it was over. Tony had walked away with his pride in tact. He never begged her even though he wanted to. Their relationship was strained for a while. Then Jeanne came along. Tony had fallen in love. Ziva had lost her chance. So she thought.

Ziva sighed out in a strange contentment. She didn't doubt Tony would find and rescue her. He had rescued her before when all seemed hopeless. She had survived torture and much more. Now she would have to survive the strange capture of doting on her every need. She laughed at the irony of the situation. She was being waited upon like a princess. Yet she was held captive like an animal.

Ziva closed her eyes preparing to sleep. She realized that she had only been there a few days. She could handle this. The only thing that made her fear losing her mind in such an easy place to stay compared to Somalia was her deep longing to be near Tony.

"Are you dreaming?" Tony whispered into Ziva's ear.

"Maybe." Ziva purred. She rolled over to face him. "But reality is much better." She stretched her arms up to encircle Tony's neck.

"Well, as much as I'd like a booty call." Tony winked as he slapped Ziva's backside. "Gibbs called. Your cells been vibrating too. He said we got a dead body."

Ziva stretched. "Does he think we will come in without a shower?"

"Nah. He said hurry and shower. Get a hold of Ziva if I could and meet him at the location." Tony explained. "He didn't know I was right beside of you."

Ziva yawned then let loose of Tony's neck.. "Then join me for a shower."

Ziva's eyes became heavier as she thought of Tony and her together. Soon she was asleep.

"She asleep yet?" He asked as he stared at the monitor.

"Yes." She stated before turning in her chair. "This is working so far. Well, all but Ray. That didn't work as well as we thought."

"No kidding." He sat down on the edge of desk that held the computer monitor. "He became a liability to us. Ray wasn't doing his job. He was too busy trying to get close to Ziva instead of make her think he was close."

"That's true." She shook her head in disappointment. "I can't believe she never fell for his charms. Now instead of his baby. We're stuck with Tony's."

"Well, at least the mother is the right one." He pushed off the desk. "I got to check in with the boss."

"I have to make sure she's asleep so I can get that ultrasound." She stated as she stood.

"By the way, what are we going to tell the girl about Ray?" He rubbed his neck. "She was in love with him."

"The boss will find her another match for her husband." She explained. "Let's just hope she accepts the plan. It will help when we explain it was Ziva's and Ray's baby. And that Ziva died in child birth leaving the child with her."

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I hope this isn't getting boring. Seems the reviews are slowing compared to beginning. Maybe it is a little cheesy plot..thought it would be fun this way.