"Taeyeon" I groaned at the sudden noise interrupting my sleep and I again flailed my arms to wave it away. I was glad when it soon stopped...only to start up again a few moments later. "Taeyeon" this time I woke up because I sensed urgency in the voice, I opened my eyes and came back to the real world where Tiffany was crouched in front of me hugging her bear.
"What's wrong, are you okay?" I asked, sitting up and rubbing my eyes.
"There's someone at the door"
I froze immediately before a loud knocking broke me out of it. There was only one person who came this late at night.
"Yah! Open the door!"
I looked to Tiffany to see she was scared. I told her to go back into my room but she refused, wanting to stay safe with me. I thought to keep quiet and eventually she would go away but the loud kick to the door made me think otherwise. I got up, looked back to Tiffany to give a reassuring smile and opened up the door.
She was smiling. Not a sweet one either, menacing.
"Taeyeon"
"Jessica"
We stared for a while, just taking each other in silently.
"Are you going to let me in?" She asked.
"Why would I do that?" I replied, she was surprised at my boldness. I never refused her, or talked back to her that way.
"Because I'm your girlfriend?"
I laughed. "Yeah of course you are. You didn't break up with me a few days ago...it was all in my head right?" My voice was full of sarcasm and anger, something she didn't really appreciate.
"I never left you silly..." She started to step inside but I didn't move so all she was really doing was just stepping closer to me. "I missed you" she smirked while playing with the ends of my hair.
I said nothing but then...she kissed me. She kissed me and I found it hard to pull away at first, but then amongst my muddled thoughts I remembered Tiffany. I removed myself from Jessica and shot her a look that was full of confusion.
"No...you broke up with me this isn't right" I frowned. "I'll call you soon okay? Just not now" I sighed and closed the door in her face. I was staring at the door while I heard her walk away and then I turned around to look at the sofa, Tiffany wasn't there.
I frowned and walked towards it, seeing she had left the teddy behind. I made my way over to my room and knocked, no answer.
"Tiffany?" I called out to the pitch black room once I opened the door. "Tiffany are you okay?"
I turned on the light and saw her sitting on the bed, cross legged and her head lowered. I walked to her and sat down on the edge of the bed beside her.
"Are you alright?" I asked again. She brought her head up and I could see her eyes were sad.
"Why did you kiss her?" She asked quietly.
"Um...she kissed me actually" I frowned, wondering why she was asking.
"She treated you bad Taeyeon." Tiffany replied, lowering her head a little once again.
"I know, it's not as if I'm getting back with her" I chuckled lightly but she didn't laugh with me. "What's wrong?"
"If you get back together with her...you'll forget me" she said, her eyes now overflowing with tears. I unconsciously moved closer only to realise my mistake when she shot her head up in fear. I moved back again and placed my hands in my lap.
"I'm not getting back with her silly and of course I wouldn't forget about you." I smiled reassuringly. "This is your home now and even if I did get back with her..." She flinched at that, worrying me slightly. "...I would never make you leave. We're in this together okay?"
She nodded but I wasn't convinced that she believed me. "Sorry" she said, looking back up to me. "I don't like her, she reminds me of the people at the orphanage"
"She's not like that Tiff" I frowned only to find I saddened her more. "Don't worry okay? You're not going anywhere, I promise"
Finally she smiled and I handed her the teddy I had forgotten I'd picked up. She thanked me and I went back to the sofa, stressed now about her and Jessica. Why did Jess show up? Why was Tiffany taking it so hard?
...
I was scared that I would wake up and she would be gone again. I mean, I was still confused about her reaction to Jessica because Tiffany and I weren't that close...sure I was looking after her but, urgh I don't ever know.
As I got up, I yawned and turned to go to her room...my room. It's funny how I refer to my stuff as hers now, it's almost as if I've already decided that she'd live here permanently. Of course she'd have to get a job, but we'd work on that, she can't even be touched right now let alone work in all the hustle and bustle of a work environment.
"Tiffany?" I called out from behind her door. I heard shuffling from inside and then she quickly opened it. Okay so...she was adorable. I could see her child-like qualities now as her hair was ruffled, her eyes squinted, cheeks rosy and just cute in general. "Hi" I smiled.
"Hi" she gave a small smile back, I saw her fingers playing with the handle of the door nervously and her feet shifting beneath her.
"Are you okay?" I asked, confused to why she seemed uncomfortable with me.
"I'm fine" she replied, glancing up at me but then looking away immediately. I saw a wince come up on her face and her hand shot to her stomach.
"What's wrong?" I frowned, she was in pain and wasn't telling me why.
Her eyes flickered to mine again and I could see insecurity and embarrassment hidden in their brown depths. I glanced behind her and saw there was blood on the bed, I was about to become worried when all the pieces clicked into place.
"You don't have to be embarrassed you know" I gave a reassuring smile. "We are both girls right?" She nodded but lowered her head. "I'll just go to the shop, I won't be long" I told her, grabbed my car keys and left. I had already put on clothes.
Bless her, it was her 'time of the month' and she was too embarrassed to say anything. I had the feeling that she would have tried to hide the sheets until I had gone to work or something and then tried to wash them. It was just a reminder that we really need to open up to each other more so we can feel comfortable around one another.
I parked the car, went inside and got her some toiletries and then soon after I was on my way home again. As I opened the door, sure enough there was Tiffany trying to work the washing machine. I smiled and shut the door quite audibly so she knew I was there.
She raised her head and then lowered it while I smirked and set down the bag on the kitchen table. "Tiffany, really it's okay. I can do that" I said, taking her place at the washing machine and turning it on. "It's no biggie" I was about to pat her head but managed to catch myself in in time, this was also something that needed to change. Either she becomes comfortable being touched or I learn to stop touching...I'd much prefer the former.
I picked up the bag on the table and gave it to her and watched as she took a peek inside. I saw her cheeks turn pink and then she bowed that same deep bow before scurrying to the toilet. I chuckled silently to myself before going to my wardrobe and picking out some new underwear and new trousers for her. After waiting a while, I knocked on the toilet door to get her attention.
"Tiffany, I have some clean clothes here, if you pass me your dirty ones I can put them in the laundry basket."
"I can do it" she called out but opened the door slightly, her arm reaching out through the gap for the clean clothes.
I sighed but passed them to her, watching as the door closed shut and heard the tap from the sink running. "Feel free to have a bath Tiff, I'm going to go start breakfast"
"Thank you Tae!"
I smiled. Tae...that's cute. I didn't question it and went to the kitchen. Americans...what do Americans like for breakfast?
Cereal? I have none
Bacon and eggs? Hmm...maybe.
Oh pancakes would be nice.
I decided on pancakes and got all the ingredients out of the cupboard, laying them all out on the counter and then started to make them. I tried to go as fast as I could so I could surprise Tiffany, I wanted to see that smile again because it somehow managed to brighten up my day each time it showed.
