"He'll be okay, Kate. Espo said the second he learns anything, he'll let us know." Castle assured Beckett as they exited the elevator into the bullpen.

"I know, but still. I feel kinda bad just leaving him in there," Beckett said as they passed by their desks to head straight towards investigations. Beckett called on the drive over to make sure that Stacy was waiting for them when they arrived.

"Ryan's still in surgery so we can't do much at the hospital other than worry." Castle rubbed her arm to sooth her last minute worries.

"What if...what if Esposito does something stupid? Like Ryan wakes up and they don't let Espo in and he threatens a doctor." She stopped just outside the door to Interrogation One.

Castle weighed the possibility in his head. It was very likely that could happen, but telling Beckett so would not help. "Esposito's a big boy. He'll have to learn how to control himself."

"Castle, this isn't a joke."

"I'm not joking. Listen, if I was worried at all I would have stayed behind with Espo and let you handle this alone. But I'm not worried at all." Castle kissed her temple.

Beckett smiled softly. "You're never worried. Your glass is always half full."

"Better than half full, don't ya' think?"

"Yeah, but right now I'm positive our glass is just about empty," Beckett said, her voice now somber.

Castle sighed and hated that he could think of nothing to say to convince her otherwise. Sure, in just a few minutes, Stacy would be carted away to prison where she'd never hurt anyone ever again. But they still had to clean up her mess; pick up all the broken pieces she left behind and mend them back together. "One step at a time."

The uncertainty on Beckett's face was wiped away and replaced with sheer determination. "Let's start with putting her away. While I wish 6 feet under was an option, behind bars until she's dead will have to do."

Castle smiled. "That's my girl. Go get her."

Beckett rolled her shoulders and shoved open the door forcefully. She kept her head high as she sauntered to the seat across from Stacy. Castle followed just behind her, but knew he looked nowhere near as intimidating.

"Stacy McGuire," Beckett practically spat her name.

"Detective Beckett, how are you?" Stacy smiled widely back, mocking her silently but at the same time screaming her victory.

"Did you think you were going to get away with it? That we wouldn't find them?" Beckett ignored Stacy's feigned attempt at small talk.

"Hmm," Stacy brought her handcuffed hands up to her face to tap her chin. "But it seems as I've already gotten away with it, though."

Beckett leaned in closer, enhancing her threatening aura. Castle didn't even think it was possible, but when it came to her family she never felt threatening enough. "It seems that you've underestimated my team, my family. We're going to walk away from this fine. They're going to walk away from this fine. Your little game is over and you lost."

Stacy laughed as if she was carefree and not about to charged to life in prison without parole. "From where I was standing not so long ago, it looked like I indeed won, Detective. I mean, Raley was begging him and if you had showed up maybe a bit later it would have been-"

"It would been even more charges added to your growing list." Beckett quickly cut her off, neither wanting to hear any of her deranged fantasies. "We have your confession on tape, all we need is your formal confession."

Stacy's eyes lit up and she smirked. "Ooh, so you've watched the tape? Please, tell me how you liked it."

Castle felt his stomach clench at the mention of the tape. He had been so busy with making sure Ryan's wound was taken care of that he didn't grab the tape; he didn't even think of the tape. But Beckett brought it up, so hopefully she snatched it. Castle had a pretty good feeling of what was on that and he didn't want it anyone else's hands for the sake of his friends.

"Murder," Beckett said bringing them back on topic. "You confessed to three. And we have you in the midst of attempted murder and sexual assault of two NYPD Detectives." Beckett looked down at her notes. Castle could tell she was doing her best to ignore Stacy's taunts. She was trying hard to forget how they found their partners.

"You want me to write it all down? Can I skim over the first three? Because I'd much rather go into great detail about Roach. How Raley squirmed underneath begging for Ochoa to fuck him. You've obviously seen Ochoa and...his size, there's no way Raley would have been able to keep quiet. You ruined a really good show."

Never once in Castle's entire life had he ever wanted to hit a girl. Not the critic that bashed one of his first novels. Not the girl that had befriended Alexis just to try and steal her boyfriend. Not even Gina when she chose to go travel LA instead of stay and care for their daughter. Did he put them in fictional scenarios in his head where they end up killed by a latest villain from his books? Naturally. But he had never actually wanted to cause harm to a woman until now.

As Stacy sat across from them smugly bragging about what could have been, Castle wanted nothing more than beat her until she was unconscious. Kinda like he did to Lockwood after he was tortured Ryan and Esposito.

He gritted his teeth and squeezed his hands into fists underneath the table to keep her from getting the satisfaction of getting a rise out of him. He knew he wasn't going to last much longer, but Beckett thankfully solved his problem.

She shoved her chair so she could stand up; she did so with so much force that it clattered to the ground. "Watch your mouth! Those are my partners and I'll be damned if I let a sleazebag like you talk about them like that."

"I am only stating facts, Detective. Isn't that what you wanted? The truth?" Stacy acted shocked that Beckett was yelling at her, but Castle could still see the smirk lingering.

Beckett towered over her with a glare so fierce it could kill. "No. What I want is for you to rot in Hell. I want you to suffer."

"Maybe one day your wish will come true, but right now I think it's you who's suffering." Stacy shot back without hesitation. She bravely held Beckett's eye contact without backing down. She was good, but she wasn't Beckett.

Beckett didn't blink as she started to talk in a hushed, but just as menacing tone. "You aren't the first psychopath that I've put away. You also aren't the first person who's died after hurting my family. Those people that I've put in prison? Some of them, as you'd expect, hate me, but there are others who were never grateful for anything in their life than me. So don't think you're safe in that cell. Don't think that I can't get you in that cell." It was Beckett's turn to smirk as Stacy's tough facade started to fade. "You better keep your eyes open in there because I promise you there are people who will have no problem taking care of you. And the best part is, no one would even miss a bastard like you."

Castle smiled proudly when he noticed that Stacy's left eye twitched. Her eyes flickered from Beckett to him. He was a writer so he felt the need to expand on their their threat just a bit. "The last guy we put away for trying to hurt us is gone and we're still here. I think you know how your story ends." Of course she didn't need to know that Lockwood had escaped and managed to kill Montgomery before he was finally killed.

Beckett tossed her notepad on the table in front of Stacy before turning around. "C'mon, Castle, let's give her some time to write up her confession."

Castle reminded himself to tell Beckett how Stacy flinched as the pad hit the table with a soft thud. He knew Beckett could break her. Nobody messed with their family and walked away to tell the tale. Well, technically they did, but they definitely didn't go around bragging.

He nodded and stared her down for one last moment before he stood up and followed Beckett out into the Bullpen. They walked straight to the observation box and watched through the one-way glass as Stacy hesitantly picked up her pencil. She wasn't as eager to write as she was earlier, and Castle couldn't help but smirk at that.

"It's nice to see her quaking in her boots for a change," Beckett said softly.

Castle nodded his head and didn't offer much to say. He agreed that it was nice to see her speechless and lost after what she put Ryan and Esposito through, but he still couldn't help feeling just the slightest bit curious.

Why was she so intent on all of this? Why did she pretend to be against the LGBTQ+ community? Why did she choose Theresa Huller, Daniel Santos and James O'Bergh to be her victims? What was her fascination with Roach?

Out of all the thoughts running around in his head, all he could get out to Beckett was, "Why?"

Beckett remained silent for a slight moment before sighing heavily. "I don't know, Castle. But we've got her now and if you go in asking questions...she'll think she won. It's better to wonder than to give her the satisfaction of knowing she stumped us."

"I understand," Castle muttered. And he did, but that didn't mean he was happy not knowing. It was something he'd have to come to deal with. Maybe she'd write it in her confession.

She had really confessed on the tape, but unknowingly to her, Caste and Beckett hadn't watched it. By the way Stacy was talking about it he wasn't sure if he did want to watch it. But the curious part of him wanted to know; he wanted to know what Esposito and Ryan endured through.

"Did you take it?" Castle asked quietly, knowing that Beckett knew exactly what he was referring to.

She turned her head downwards and her eyes drifted to stare at Castle through her hair that was falling on her shoulder. "Yes." She patted her pocket softly.

"Do you...do you think we should watch it…?" He asked hesitantly, wondering himself if the question was stupid to ask out loud.

Beckett looked down at her coat pocket briefly and then back up at Castle. "If we know what they went through maybe we can help more." Castle had to admit that that was a plus, but what if they were wrong?

"There could also be more stuff on the tape...maybe something that would answer our questions." Castle offered and he couldn't help but feel maybe they were just making up excuses. Beckett didn't say anything else, but Castle had an idea of what she was thinking. "What do we do about the boys?"

"I don't...we should watch it when they're not around obviously. And we only tell them if it's absolutely necessary." Beckett said slowly as she probably debated the pros and cons of their situation in her head.

"Okay." Castle nodded his head and repeated. "Okay, yeah, that sounds good to me."

Beckett turned fully to face him. "Then we-" She was interrupted by the ringing of her cell phone.

"Esposito," Castle barely managed to get out before Beckett already answered it.

"Javi? What's wrong?" Beckett grew quiet as she listened to Esposito's response. She nodded and said, "We'll be right there." before hanging up.

Castle looked at her expectantly as she put her phone back in her pocket. She caught his gaze and smiled softly.

"Ryan's out of surgery."


Esposito hesitantly entered the hospital room where his partner laid, sleeping off the medication the doctors gave him before the surgery. He hadn't seen him since he was on top of him on that bed. Esposito shivered at the memory.

He chased the images of what they went through in that hellhole away from his mind. He thought about Ryan before this mess. The Ryan that answered his phone at 6 in the morning and barely grunted his responses, but only a half hour he smile was a mile wide when he showed up in the precinct. That point during their late night shifts when Ryan undid his top button and let himself sag in his chair. The giggling that started when he was only a few beers in. His smile and laugh. God, it already felt like years since he'd seen his partner smile.

He missed it.

Esposito took a deep breath and sat on the seat next to Ryan. He called Beckett just before the nurse directed him towards Ryan's room, so he didn't have much time alone. Reassuring himself that Ryan was unconscious and would not know of anything that happened in here, Espo grabbed his partner's hand.

"Kevin," his voice sounded rough and lost in the sterile room. "I don't know if you're going to even want to talk me when you wake up, let alone be in the same room. But, I'll be gone by then." He paused, subconsciously waiting for Ryan to wake up and declare everything Espo just said bullshit. But he didn't. So Esposito continued. "I'm sorry. I just want you to know that what happened-what I did to you-I shouldn't have. Never in a million years."

His stomach churned violently. "I wasn't able to get you out of there and believe me, I would have done anything to keep you safe." Memories of him placing his lips on Ryan's shaking body, but he couldn't remember much clearly without hating himself all that much more. "I wasn't myself...you know I would never do any of that to you in normal circumstances."

Most of Esposito knew it wasn't his fault and yet, he still wanted to run away from his partner. Espo wanted to get away before he had to look into those blue eyes and relive the torture of seeing the pain and humiliation that was drowning them while Ryan was cuffed to the bed at the mercy of his partner.

And he wanted to escape the confusion and feelings. Those were harder to hide from. How were they supposed to go back to pretending like this case never happened when they both knew what happened. How was Esposito supposed to tell Ryan how he felt without seeming like an ass. Maybe Ryan thought that Espo just got off on roughing Ryan up, making him cry and beg. Ryan would never feel safe with him again.

Esposito held Ryan's hand tighter in his as he squeezed his eyes shut. Just the thought of Ryan flinching whenever Esposito made too sudden of a movement or even being too close burned his eyes with unshed tears.

Esposito wasn't the man to cry. He got pretty damn close a few times, but never actually did tears fall. Not since elementary school. But as he spoke, the tears refused to stop flowing and his voice was no longer steady and strong. "Kevin, never again. Never again will I hurt you. You are the most important person in my life and I'd rather die," Esposito had to pause to take in a shaky breath. "I'd rather die than ever have you crying in my arms again. You are my everything and I'm not staying away to hurt you. I'm staying away because I can't hurt you again. I love you too much, Kevin Ryan."

Those words even surprised Esposito himself. He didn't throw that word around lightly, 'love'. He never really believed in it much; people leave, promises break and feelings change. Kevin was the one to change Esposito's entire opinion on the thought. His partner taught him that love is real and the best kind is found in the most unlikely of places.

"I love you," Esposito repeated. This time he leaned in close and whispered it. He didn't want anyone to hear it. Those three words were private and only Ryan should ever hear them out of his mouth.

Esposito stared at Ryan's face, watching intently as his eyes flickered around underneath his closed lids. He wanted Ryan to wake up right now and stop him from leaving. He needed Ryan to tell every part of Esposito's body that believed walking away was the good thing to do that they were wrong.

But he stayed sleeping and the grip in his hand remained lax. Here would be where Esposito would stand up and leave a small kiss to Ryan's forehead in any cliche movie, but he couldn't. It would hurt too much. So with one last squeeze to Ryan's hand, he let it drop back to the bed and he slowly left the room taking all of his hurt and confusion and feelings with him.


The shrill, mocking laughter pierced through Ryan's ears. He knew who that laughter belonged to. Chills ran through his body when he realized he was strapped down to the bed once again. He thought...he could have sworn that Castle and Beckett saved them. They were safe. What happened?

Ryan opened his eyes and hoped maybe it was all just a dream, but he looked around and recognized Stacy's apartment. He started to squirm and flopped his head back and forth muttering, "No, no, no, no."

He was back in that hell, handcuffed naked to a psychopath's bed. The room seemed darker and hazier than the first time, but he could clearly see Stacy standing at the foot of the bed with a grin that stretched from ear to ear. "Don't be so negative, Raley. The fun has only begun."

Ryan's heart began to race when she came close enough to place her hand on his arm. Instinctively, he turned to his partner for comfort; Javier was always the best at that. But then his heart stopped when he curled towards a cold, empty side of the bed. His wide eyes darted around the room searching for any signs of his partner.

Stacy's voice caught his attention, "Oh, you're looking for your partner? He's gone. He had his fun with you and decided to move on." She shrugged her shoulders.

Once she mentioned it, instantly, Ryan's body felt sore. But it had to be a mind game, right? Because only a moment ago he felt fine. And there was no way his partner would abandon him if he had a choice in the matter. And he wouldn't use him and throw him away without a second thought.

Looking back up at her, Ryan was determined to deny it all and scream at her, but her roaming eyes made him halt. Her scrutiny made him uncomfortable and he felt dirty. He didn't want her to make him feel so inferior. "You're a liar."

Stacy's eyes flickered up to Ryan's face. "What makes you say that?"

"Kevin...I'm sorry."

Ryan looked away from her to try and find the source of his partner's voice. It sounded too real to be imagined, but it was just out of his reach. Though it was faint and Ryan wasn't even sure he wasn't imagining it, it gave Ryan the hope and courage he needed to fight through this. Again. "He's my partner."

Stacy scuffed. "After what he did to you?"

"I would have done anything to keep you safe."

Ryan felt his spirits rise a bit more each time he heard his partner's voice breaking through the nightmare. "He's my partner. He didn't do anything to hurt me. Even if he did, I'd forgive him without a second thought."

Once those words came out of his mouth, he felt a sudden comfort presence besides him. He no longer felt alone. He turned around and saw he was still alone, but he didn't feel like he was. There was a warm pressure around his hand and it enclosed around his fingers like a hand in his. "Javi," Ryan murmured when he realized, somewhere, his partner was holding his hand. That hand felt like his savior; if he could hold on then maybe it would drag him far away from here and into Javier's arms.

"He abandoned you," Stacy spat. Her eyes narrowed and she grew more and more scarier as Ryan began to understand that this was all just created by the dark patch of his subconscious for a mind-terror.

The invisible grip on Ryan's hand tightened and Ryan smiled bravely. "No. He's here. And he didn't hurt me."

"You are the most important person in my life."

"You're mine now, Raley!" Stacy roared, slapping Ryan across the face.

Ryan was too hooked on his partner to feel the pain that really didn't exist. "No. I'm his partner. I will never be yours."

Stacy calmed down enough so she wasn't screaming. "What happens when you go back to him and he's gone, huh? Who will you run to then? Who will protect you?"

"He wouldn't-" His partner's voice interrupted him. Now he sounded much more ragged and broken.

"I'm staying away because I can't hurt you again."

Ryan was confused now. If he was so important why was Espo leaving him? And to keep him safe? Didn't Esposito know that he was safer with him by his side? Ryan could already feel the comforting presence on his hand disappearing. He desperately tried to grab back for it, but his fingers refused to move.

"What's matter? I thought you said he'd never leave you?" Stacy must have caught on to Ryan's rising panic.

"He's not going to," Ryan said, though he was not as hopeful as earlier.

"I'll be gone by then."

"He's not going to leave me!" Ryan yelled, not at Stacy, but at that voice. He had to reach his partner before he left.

Stacy smirked. "It sure doesn't sound it." She laughed again; it was such a horrendous sound. "Time to face the music, Raley. You're here to stay, lost forever."

"No, no, no," Ryan started muttering again. He didn't want to hear her voice and definitely didn't want to hear Javier saying goodbye. He's muttering steadily grew louder, so much that he almost missed Javier's last whisper.

"I love you, Kevin Ryan."

This time, the voice was so close that Ryan felt as if he could reach out and touch his partner. "Did you hear that?" Ryan breathed, looking up at the ceiling. "He loves me. He wouldn't leave me. He loves me." He finally smiled for what felt like for the first time in ages.

Stacy didn't look angry; she looked calm. It frightened Ryan, but not enough to stop him from breaking through to Esposito. "You'll be back. When you realize that he's gone, you'll fall right back to me."

Ryan didn't pay much attention to her. He continued to mumble, "He loves me," under his breath like it was his dying wish.

Stacy started to fade and Ryan could feel it working; he was finally waking up. Ryan squeezed his eyes shut and whispered one last time, "I love you, too, Javi."

The next time he opened his eyes, he could barely keep them open. His body was still exhausted and his eyes burned at both the light and being opened. But he fought to keep them open long enough to see Esposito.

His eyes slowly moved around the room, but it was empty. His heart plummeted into his stomach when he realized that Javier had left. The bedspread by his hand was still faintly warm and there was a chair directly beside his bed, but his partner was nowhere in sight.

Without Javier there to make him feel safe, Kevin couldn't keep his eyes open much longer. They burned and his body begged to go back to sleep. He knew it was all just a nightmare and he could steer clear from Stacy haunting his mind if he really tried. But as he drifted back to sleep without Javier by his side, Ryan couldn't help as he fell back to unconsciousness where his most haunting fears lived.


Javi really frustrated me in this chapter as I was writing. I'm sorry if you felt the same, but I could wrap it up easy once they're saved. nope

It's that time of year again, guys! The Rysposito Secret Santa Fic Exchange sign ups are open from now until October 25. And this year, it's not only writers who can participate. If you ship Rysposito and want your own fic to read based off a prompt of your choosing then you should join. You also do not need a tumblr account to join. And I'm guessing since you're reading this you ship RYsposito so all of you could sign up and get your own fic without needing to write one, unless you want to. Here is the post where you can read the rules and learn how to sign. I hope some of you join!

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