(This is based on the Ranma ½ series by Rumiko Takahashi – the characters aren't owned or the invention me, the author of this fanfic, in any way, shape, or form. I also don't own the rights to Gravitation or Battle Athletes: Victory.)
Identity Crisis
Episode 7 – Akane's Day of Revelations
By this point, Ranma had been gone for months. Akane sighed, staring out at the empty yard as she ate her breakfast rice. The father of the family raised concerned eyebrows at his daughter's behavior and asked, "What's the matter?"
"I miss P-chan," Akane confessed. "I don't know where he could have gone to. Do you think he's lost?"
Soun nodded and turned his head back down to the newspaper. He readjusted his grip on the pages. "I'd bet."
"What do you mean?"
Soun began, "Akane," then he sighed and set the paper down. "Ryoga is P-chan. Your pet pig is actually that shy guy who visits you and hasn't got the nerve to tell you the truth about his alternate form and his feelings for you, because he's too embarrassed."
"W-w-wah? What are you talking about?"
"P-chan is no ordinary pig. Ryoga is one of the Jusenkyo cursed, and his alternate form is as your pet P-chan. Need I repeat it again?"
"That's just – that's…. How long have you known this?"
Soun replied, "For some time, now. He used the furo to change back to human form while I was watching. Must not have noticed me. I'd thought you would eventually find out, but sometimes, a person needs telling."
Akane blinked. "B-but… Ranma must've known, too. That would explain why he called Ryoga 'P-chan.'"
"Yes, it would, wouldn't it?"
Akane turned red. "But I let – I let P-chan sleep with me! I - I… I undressed in front of him!"
"... You what?"
"I thought he was just a pet!"
Soun thought for a moment, sighed, and and picked up the newspaper again. "Well, there isn't anything to be done about it, now."
Nabiki mumbled, "Also, it's obvious to everyone else that Ryoga thinks you're cute. Maybe cuz he's seen you naked, I dunno."
Another shock to Akane. "He does? It is?"
Nabiki sighed and shook her head. "Why must my sister be so dense?"
"Ryoga, you idiot. I thought you were different. Men are so stupid. Wait! That would mean –" That would mean the person he tried to catch with the fishing rod of love was… was me!
Congratulations, Lois, you've figured out who Superman is.
RANMA 1/2
Akane sent punch after punch into Ryoga's torso – or rather the torso of the dummy she imagined was Ryoga – until she'd beaten most of the foam out of him. Then she took a swig of her bottled water, wiped her forehead of sweat, and sighed. Thoughts spun through her head. I loved my P-chan. Why didn't Ryoga tell me? He was always nice to me. She tossed a roundhouse at the dummy, making it topple over. Maybe I don't have much reason to be angry. I suppose it was embarrassing for him. But it's embarrassing for me, too. He should've told me before anyone else found out. I would've understood. I wouldn't have held it against him, so long as he was open and honest with me, instead of wanting to hold onto his pride. I would've helped him keep his identity a secret, if it really meant that much to him.
At first Akane had a hard time telling herself that P-Chan and Ryoga were the same person… pig… whatever. The idea was too huge. She'd known Ranma was both male and female ever since they'd first met, and all the other Jusenkyo cursed were, well, not-so-nice to her, and she hadn't made an attachment to any of their alternate forms, either. But then Akane realized it made too much sense, and as her mind started making connections she'd never made before, she realized that the truth had been right in front of her – and that made her mad.
But now Akane was finding it hard to stay too mad, now that she'd released most of her negative energy. This was a betrayal of trust, and it stung, but she loved P-chan. And she'd always liked Ryoga, though not in the way he apparently did. The next time Akane met Ryoga, she would revenge herself. Then they could be friends again.
And then Akane thought, He liked me? That's right, he tried to catch me with the Rod of Love. Now she wasn't so certain about the "friends" thing. She would need another dummy to get over this one. Why do boys have to be such idiots around women? Would he really do something like that to –?
"Heh, he got what he deserved." Wait a second, Akane thought. That assumes that Ranma and Ryoga are unhappy. "Whatever." They're just under the influence of a magic spell. It's not true love. There's never been a great love in the world that was caused by magic. (Except Tristan and Isolde – but apparently Akane wasn't literate enough to know about the second most famous couple in Western literature.)
RANMA 1/2
The bell chimed as Akane entered Ucchan's. The windows were all open and there weren't many customers at this time of day – this was the time when it was best to talk to Ukyo, of course – but the Japanese pizza place was still broiling. Summer break from school was so close she could almost taste it, but there were other things Akane wanted to taste, first – secrets, namely. And okonomiyaki.
Ukyo looked up from the grill and thrust out her chin. "What up?"
"Hey, Ukyo."
"What'll you have?"
"The usual."
"You order something different every time you come here."
"I have?" Akane turned her head sideways as she tried to remember. "Oh. Well, just give me whatever seems best."
Ukyo shrugged. "Fine." Ukyo started grilling the batter. "So you just come for the food, or you wanna talk?"
"Actually, I did come to ask you something," Akane said as she sat down on a stool by the counter-grill area. "I was wondering if you knew what was going on with Shampoo and Nabiki."
Ukyo looked uncertain. "Well…."
"Do you?"
"I've got my suspicions. It's not something I've asked them about, but I think I have an idea."
Akane leaned forward. "Tell me!"
Ukyo licked her lips and looked upwards ponderously. She shrugged and said, "Alright, but don't let anyone know I said this."
Akane nodded. "Sure."
"I'm not typically the gossiping sort."
"Neither am I. So let's gossip."
"Okay," Ukyo said, and paused a few seconds to figure out how to phrase this. "I think Shampoo and Nabiki are going out."
"I know," Akane said. "But where? And why?"
"Um... I mean, 'going out' as in going on dates. Like girlfriend and… girlfriend."
Akane blinked. "What? You mean like – like homosexuals? Nabiki wouldn't do that. I don't think she would. Probably not. She likes men, of course she wouldn't. She calls Kuno-sempai 'Kuno-chan' all the time."
"So?"
"So?"
"Maybe she likes girls, too."
Akane shook her head in disbelief. "Why would a girl go out with another girl when she can go out with guys?"
"Because she's attracted to other girls, duh." Ukyo slapped her forehead. "It's the same reason straight girls go out with guys – they're attracted to them."
"But – but that's just not right!"
"Why isn't it?"
"This is weird," Akane said. "Since when were you all for acceptance of… of gayness?"
"Well, it all happened the other night..."
RANMA 1/2
The sun was setting, and Ukyo had just finished closing up when the door chimed and Ukyo's live-in waitress hollered, "Shampoo return from video store!"
"What did you bring?" Ukyo asked.
"One of greatest anime ever: Gravitation!"
"Really? What's it about?"
"Ukyo see! Has very kawaii bisshounen!"
"Interesting..."
They took the DVDs to the back room where the TV was. Shampoo inserted the first DVD while Ukyo got comfortable in one of the chairs. Then Shampoo produced from sub-space fifty feet of silk rope and strapped down Ukyo.
"What're you doing?" Ukyo demanded.
"Shh! Stay right here," Shampoo said.
"You've done a good job making sure of that."
"I bring popcorn!" Shampoo said, switching on the TV. "You watch start of show. Shampoo already see."
Ukyo grunted. "Whatever." And then Ukyo watched Gravitation...
RANMA 1/2
"Really?" Akane raised an eyebrow skeptically. "And what about that show made you change your mind?"
Ukyo sighed. "Everything..."
RANMA 1/2
In the early morning, in the back of Ucchan's they finally finished watching the DVDs.
"That was so beautiful!" Ukyo squealed, squirming in her silken bonds. "I've come to realize the evil of my gay-hating ways. I've been converted! Alleluia!"
"That good," Shampoo said. "You want see more?"
"Please! Please!"
"Hmm," Shampoo stroked her chin thoughtfully. "I wonder if you is ready..."
"I'm ready for anything. I'm too hot and bothered to sleep right now!"
"Okay," Shampoo said. "Video store is closed now, so I get something from personal collection: Battle Athletes: Victory!"
"Is this more hot guys hot for each other?"
"Umm... you see."
RANMA 1/2
"So, yeah... I learned a lot that night," Ukyo said. "Besides, what's wrong if Shampoo and Nabiki love each other, really?"
"Because… It's not proper. And because dad wants one of us to inherit the dojo and carry on our martial arts tradition."
Ukyo perked up an eyebrow. "You really figure your dad would trust the dojo to Nabiki? And aren't you the one of your three sisters with the best skills? Aren't you the least likely to sell the dojo for a quick profit? I doubt Nabiki would be the sort to make babies with anyone, regardless of who she picked for a soul-mate…. She has a soul, right?"
"Hey! That's my sister!"
"I'm just kidding," Ukyo said. Ukyo was sort of kidding, anyway. "But she's certainly earned her reputation for being an avaricious, manipulative… I can't really match those words with a pleasant-sounding noun, you know?"
Akane sighed. "I'll admit that's true, but she isn't all bad. Most people never get to see her better side."
Ukyo shrugged and served Akane her okonomiyaki. Akane started eating, and there was a pause in the conversation for a while. There wasn't much more to say until Akane decided to tell what had been troubling her mind the most as of late. She said, "My dad told me that Ryoga and P-chan are the same person… pig, or whatever. Ryoga is one of the Jusenkyo cursed, and he turns into a –"
"A pig? Really? You mean your cute little pet is Ryoga?" Ukyo laughed. "That's so cool! He must've been so embarrassed he couldn't tell anyone."
"I didn't think it was cool."
"Why not?"
"Because he didn't tell me. I was his owner. I mean, I took care of him when he was a pig."
"That's true." Ukyo said, nodding.
"Also, he..." Well, I'd better not tell her about that. It would be too tempting to tell her the truth about Ranma. "I'm going to pay Ryoga back for what he did."
Ukyo had an odd smile. "Are you gonna give P-chan a hot bath?"
"Why are you grinning like that?"
"I'm thinkin' of Ryoga naked." Ukyo lifted her eyebrows twice.
"Why should I want to see him naked?"
"Well, if I were him… I mean, he was your pet, and you probably undressed in front of him without thinking about it."
"Yeah, and it really pisses me –"
"So he owes it to you that you get a good look at him," Ukyo said, bobbing her head and leering in a way that was frightening Akane.
Akane shook her head. "That wouldn't be – No."
"Oh, c'mon, Akane," Ukyo said. "Ranma's gone, now…. He's gone and now we should find new people to chase after. Ryoga would be a great choice. He likes you a lot."
"You mean you could tell?"
"Of course I could!" Ukyo rolled her eyes. "Everybody knows Ryoga has the hots for Akane. Well, at least I do, which I assume means most other people must know, because I'm usually the last to know anything. Anyway, you two would make such a cute couple."
Akane shook her head and bit into her okonomiyaki.
Ukyo sighed, and then served another customer his food. Akane said, "No way can I trust Ryoga, now, even if he's cute and has made a show of being nice. He'll have to earn my trust." And she thought to herself, And I don't think he'd want to give Ranma up for me. I hate men, anyhow. I don't need him. For the next few moments they talked about stuff that has nothing to do with the plot, and when Akane finished her meal she left Ucchan's.
Akane walked home, and didn't notice anything unusual. She went inside the house and walked into the living room where the TV was on. Akane saw Shampoo and Nabiki sitting on the floor, huddled close together – arms around each other! – and crying a good cry together. Maybe it was just a regular girls-having-an-emotional-catharsis-together thing, not a lesbians-having-an-emotional-catharsis-together thing. Hopefully. Shampoo and Nabiki turned to look up at Akane.
"Hello," they said.
"Hello," she said.
Silence.
Awkward. Akane wasn't going to ask them if they were dating. They would probably have given an honest answer, and if they were – and they might have been – Akane didn't want to know. So Akane went into the yard to practice punching Ryoga.
She trained for about an hour until she felt thoroughly exercised and stress-relieved. Wiping sweat from her forehead with a white towel, Akane thought she ought to take a bath and relax for a while. Tossing the towel over her shoulder, she re-entered the house. Shampoo and Nabiki weren't in sight anymore. Akane walked down the hall towards the furo. The doorbell rang.
Who's this going to be?
The doorbell rang again, and Akane decided she might as well answer it, sweaty as she was, because no one else was volunteering. Where dad was, she didn't know, but Kasumi was in the kitchen and had a special kind of deafness that prevented her from hearing things over extended distances (not really brought up in the original series, or any of the errata, or really, anywhere at all except in this fanfic). And Nabiki was plain lazy, so Akane knew she was the only one who was going to answer it. So Akane opened the door.
And there he stood.
"Ranma?"
