Chapter 7

They were left alone for several hours and after the first ten minutes of being alone, Gaara had wordlessly picked Sakura up and left the Hokage Tower through the window, moving across the rooftops until he reached her old home. Considering how they visited as many times as they possibly could (since Konoha was Sakura's home village), she was allowed to keep her old home and before they returned, somebody would clean it for them, stocking it up with food and making sure it was habitable (depending on how long they're away for). They had a feeling it was Hyuuga Hinata, or possibly even Ino. Since Ino was currently away on a mission, though, they only vaguely thought that it had been Hinata this time.

The beautiful bouquet of flowers on the table was left unnoticed as Sakura sat down on one of the sofas. Behind her, Gaara sat down at the table, always making sure that she was in his peripheral vision. For now she seemed to be okay. There was no pain – at least not physically – and Shizune had told them that her body had stopped trying to flush out the fetus.

Fetus.

Funny how, since discovering the fetus was going to take Sakura away from him, Gaara had stopped referring to the thing growing within her as a child. It would be a demon just like him. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth.

Why did the Gods hate him so badly? What had he been in his previous life to cause them to throw such a hard life his way? His own mother had not survived giving birth to him and even though Gaara was aware that that was not his fault, part of him still felt guilty over such a thing. Then he was brought up in a life of solitude. Spoiled, yet ignored. Feared. Hated. To make things worse his own father had sent assassins after him.

Would he do the same thing to the fetus? No. Would he accept the fetus? It was hard to tell right now. His head was not in the right place. But if Gaara was to make a decision at that moment in time, the answer would be 'no'. He would not accept the fetus. However, the thought of killing something Sakura was fighting so hard to keep alive agonised him.

"Sakura." His voice was strained and while it angered him that he could not keep his usual emotionless and cold mask under control, Gaara found that right now, he did not care. Sakura had always appreciated being able to see his emotions. She told him that it made her feel special. "Please reconsider."

"There's nothing to reconsider," her reply, quiet and just as strained, reached his ears and as he slowly opened his eyes, he saw she hadn't even turned to look at him.

"We can try again," he suddenly told her, his voice almost childlike. "As many times as it takes and I'll do what I can to give you as many children as you want. Just… Don't leave me."

Her hand quickly raised up to her face and it was when she took a deep, shaky breath that Gaara knew Sakura was crying. "I'm not aborting our child."

"The fetus–"

"Child."

"–is not aware of it's existence." Silence. "Sakura, we will not be killing it."

"Him."

She went ignored. "We can try again and again," he told her once more, his voice sounding odd as he pleaded with her. "Until we know for certain that carrying the fetus–"

He was cut off as Sakura suddenly shot to her feet, her hand grabbing the vase filled with flowers on the table and launching it at the wall behind him. It shattered to pieces and during the collision, the flowers were torn. Still, Gaara did not flinch. He was used to her outbursts by now (though she had never been violent with him) and he had been expecting a show of anger.

"Stop saying 'fetus'," she screamed at him, glaring angrily. "He's just a baby."

The silence that followed her outburst was deafening. Her vicious glare clashing against Gaara's emotionless stare. No. It was not emotionless for there was a great pain in his eyes.

"He's just a baby," Sakura repeated as she tried to hold back her sob.

That was the sight that welcomed Temari, since she was also staying there. To say she was shocked would be an understatement as she stared between the two with wide eyes. "Shikamaru is away on a mission with his team," she stated awkwardly when Gaara's eyes slipped to hers, but just as Temari was about to continue, the agony in her little brother's eyes knocked the words out of her. "G-Gaara?" Setting her fan down beside the now shut door, she stepped further into the room, briefly glancing down at the floor to avoid stepping in the broken glass belonging to the vase. "What happened?"

It was killing her inside as she watched the pain in his eyes double before he managed to shove aside his emotions, replacing his cold mask once more. He couldn't find the words. The Kazekage could not find a way to tell Temari that his wife had chosen to give her life for the fetus growing inside of her.

She must have caught on because her eyes immediately moved to Sakura's stomach. "The baby…?"

Sakura bit her lip harshly and finished her sentence, muttering, "Isn't compatible with my body."

Her back connected with the wall as Temari felt as though the breath had been viciously ripped out of her lungs. She closed her eyes against the sudden sting. Remembering all those looks Sakura and Gaara had shared, the happiness in their eyes as they discovered her pregnancy, haunted her mind and had her fists clenching, had her nails digging into her palms. She barely even felt it. She was too stunned and her chest was aching horrifically for them both. Why couldn't Gaara be allowed this happiness? Just once. Just once, she wanted him to be allowed happiness.

"I'm sorry. I know how excited you both were about becoming parents."

"No," Gaara muttered, his voice hoarse and it was when her eyes opened that she realised a difference in her brother. His eyes were bloodshot. He had been crying. "Sakura has decided to go through with her pregnancy."

Was it wrong that Temari was suddenly hit with a nasty feeling of déjà vu? She had only been a young girl when their mother passed away, but she had known enough to know that she died during childbirth. It wasn't Gaara's fault. It had been the council's, partly their father's. They had all decided to make Gaara the next host for Shukaku while their mother was still carrying him. But Temari also knew that her little brother blamed himself for the loss of their mother. That was something she would never understand since she personally did not know the feeling. However, she knew enough to know he would blame himself for Sakura's death, too.

"Sakura," Temari's voice was serious as she stood up straight, her features pleading, "please think about this." It would kill him if Sakura left. Gaara had already suffered so much in his lifetime and losing her would destroy him. "Please." She didn't want to lose her baby brother. Temari had already experienced the overwhelming fear of that when Akatsuki had attacked their village. "What about Gaara?"

"You're not in my position, Temari." Her voice was just as serious. "You don't understand. Neither of you do."

Her upper lip curled. "I know enough to know that what you're doing is unfair. What about your child, huh? You're leaving him without a mother. Not willingly, I know, but you're still leaving him. You don't know what it's like growing up without a mother being around to look out for you. The death of our mother broke our father and now you're about to do the same to my brother," she spat angrily. "Look at Gaara. Do you think he can do this without you? There's a reason why Kankuro and I always thought he would never have children, Sakura."

Her heart felt like somebody was whipping at it with each of Temari's words. Every word, there was a vicious lashing. "I believe Gaara can do it. Not just for him but for both of us."

"You're being childish," Temari stated angrily, once again picking up her fan and settling it onto her back. "Gaara will understand perfectly what I'm trying to say. He never experienced parental love – he was only spoiled and ignored. Like Kankuro. Like me. Not a single one of us knows how to take care of a kid as our own father ignored us after the death of our mother."

With that, she left, slamming the door behind her so that she wouldn't say anything more, say something she knew for a fact that she would regret.

Gaara was silent.

Sakura lowered herself onto the sofa once more with her back to him, laying down on her side as she tried her best to stop her tears.


"You are not to be involved in Uchiha Sasuke's trial."

Her head snapped up and her eyes widened to the point where Gaara was certain Sakura had frozen in shock, especially since her chopsticks were still half-raised to her mouth, which was hanging open. Previously, he would have found it endearing – part of him still did – but now, all he kept thinking of was the death Sakura was sentencing herself to. How many days did he have left with his wife? Yes, he was certain there were around six months left, however his mind was too exhausted to count the days.

Finally, after at least a minute of silence, her mouth snapped shut and her teeth gritted. In her hand, the chopsticks snapped in half and her eyes narrowed dangerously – all signs of her fast approaching anger, of her outburst. For some reason, Gaara was certain that it would not be anything too explosive. Sakura had been extra cautious with everything she did since finding out she was pregnant.

"It's not up to you. You may be my husband–"

"Exactly. I am your husband and as your husband, I am demanding that you do not attend or be involved in his trial." His eyes narrowed. "Considering you're going through with your pregnancy, you need to keep your stress levels down. I may not care for the fetus, but you are still my wife and I still love you. I will not have you making yourself sick over somebody like him. He has already hurt you enough."

Fetus. Sakura breathed deeply, attempting to calm herself down. Like he had said, stress was not good for her right now and it was even worse for their child. Whether Gaara accepted it or not, the child growing inside her was his. It was his son. He could not ignore him forever. Sooner or later, he was going to accept the situation for what it was and he was going to bring up their son to be a strong, honourable man.

She shook her head with a sigh. "I'm his teammate–"

"Was his teammate."

"–and I need to be there to give my side of the story. I'm not letting the elders execute him – which is what they're planning on doing, right? There's no use in denying it." Gaara's expression emptied, if that was even possible and it made her heart drop. "The elders want Sasuke dead more than anything but do you really think that, after all these years of fighting so hard to bring him home, that Naruto is going to give up? That I'm going to give up? No. Naruto will hate me if I do that. I'll hate myself. So I'm going to be there," she told him, standing up and grabbing more chopsticks from the kitchen drawer. Joining him once more, Sakura continued eating her meal before it grew cold. "You don't know him."

His mask slipped and a scoff escaped him. "And you think you do?"

The words stung. There was no use in denying it. "No. I know that I don't know Sasuke. Well, not the Sasuke after the massacre." Seeing his attention focusing entirely on her, seeing the expression he got whenever he was intrigued, Sakura continued, telling him, "I remember the Sasuke who was nearly always smiling, the happy Sasuke. I remember everything about him, about who he was. He hasn't always been this… this cold, unapproachable, revenge obsessed man. Before the massacre, Sasuke was selfless. He was caring and could be so shy at times. Perhaps not a goody-two-shoes type who always helped out, but if he saw somebody who was truly in need of help, he would stop what he was doing and help them. And that's where my crush for him started. The massacre…"

Sakura shook her head, frowning sadly. "Seeing that change in him, the sudden, heartbreaking change… It made me want to help him with everything in me. Whenever I saw him sitting alone in the Academy, this little voice in the back of my mind was always yelling at me to go over to him, to try and become friends. But I was always too scared. And in the end I came across as nothing more than an annoying fan-girl and because of that, he ignored me, called me annoying."

A small smile curved her lips and she set her chopsticks down on her plate, her eyes pleading with Gaara. "But tell me this, Gaara. If Sasuke truly didn't care, if he was really such a bad person, would he have saved me all those times?" He was silent. "Exactly. And tell me if I'm wrong, but shouldn't somebody who is as powerful as Sasuke have been able to kill me with little to no trouble?"

"Kakashi and Naruto were there."

She gave him a vaguely annoyed look. "You really think they could have stopped him if he really wanted me dead? You know how fast Sasuke is. He was deliberately slow when trying to kill me. He didn't want me dead, Gaara. It may have seemed that way and for a long time, I was terrified of crossing his path again, but… I don't know. I've just been going over everything. He's as fast as Kakashi-sensei – maybe even faster. If he was being serious about killing me, he would have done it before I even knew what hit me – remember that."

"That is hardly going to matter to the elders," Gaara muttered. "It seems that there is more to this than we know. Something must have happened if the elders want him executed, especially since he defeated not only Orochimaru, but also his brother, Itachi. They were both traitors of Konoha and they were both s-classed criminals. By killing them, he decreased the risk to the village significantly. But instead of being grateful, instead of giving Uchiha leniency for what he's done, they're still adamant about killing him. He knows something that has them shaken."

"True," Sakura murmured in reply, seeming deep in thought. It was obvious that something big – and she meant huge – had happened, but what? "Should we ask–"

Gaara cut her off, "No. You are no longer a Konoha-nin, Sakura. You belong to Suna now. Whatever happened is none of our concern."

A hurt and shocked expression entered her features. "But Konoha is–"

"No."

She couldn't help the way tears filled her eyes. "Gaara–"

"There is no use in arguing with me over this, Sakura. We cannot get involved."

And that was when her tears started to fall. "I guess your promise meant nothing then, right?"

The look she received in response was blank. "Just like yours."

"That's not the same," she spat angrily, just managing to stop the urge to punch something. "It's–"

"Either way," he once again cut her off, his mask not cracking even the slightest. Gaara was never intimidated by her anger, "we are not husband and wife – at least, we seem to no longer be acting that way. You are acting the way you believe a mother should, while I am acting as Kazekage. If you were to be acting as my wife, you would have allowed us to talk about this before you chose to give your life for the fetus. If I was to act like your husband, I would do everything in my power to protect Uchiha Sasuke. But since you are no longer honouring the vows we made, I will not do so either."

Without a word, Sakura stood up, sending him one last, agonised expression before leaving the room.

"Sakura–"

"I need to be alone, Kazekage-sama."

And with that, she stormed out of the home and slammed the door shut behind her.


It was an hour later when Naruto and Kakashi found her, honestly surprising Sakura with how they were together. Usually, Kakashi kept to himself, but it seemed today was just full of surprises. She wanted to be alone at that moment in time, though could not find the words to tell them to go away. Even if she could find the words, she wasn't sure on how to say them.

Naruto dropped to the ground beside her with Kakashi sitting silently on her other side. They didn't say a word, instead settling on watching the scenery around them. It was Team Seven's training grounds. It always had been and always would be.

The silence was getting to her.

"Gaara doesn't want me to be involved with Sasuke's trial."

Again, she was taken by surprise. There was no explosion of anger from Naruto. He merely sighed and leaned back on his hands, gazing up at the dark sky that was dotted with many stars. At her other side, Kakashi also sighed.

"He's not going to do anything to try and help Sasuke."

Naruto's features twitched with pain, his eyes tightening with sadness, but there was no anger. Only acceptance. "You're his wife, Sakura-chan," he murmured, not able to tear his eyes from the sky. "Today was scary for everyone, so he only wants to make sure it doesn't happen again. I can't think of what Gaara would do without you."

It seemed neither Naruto nor Kakashi had been told what was happening or going to happen. Not too shocking, if she really thought about it. It was patient confidentiality and even though they were once her teammates, Sakura was now the Kazekage's wife. That piece of information could not get out, but… She needed her former teammates to know. She needed their help, their opinions and their advice.

"He's going to do what he did before I came along," Sakura whispered, staring down at the ground and refusing to meet their sudden, shocked gazes. "Gaara's going to continue being Kazekage and he's going to raise our child."

"Sakura…"

"What are you saying, Sakura-chan?" Naruto chuckled, trying to shove away his growing fear and unease, his pain. The look on her face… "You're going to help him, right? I mean, I know Gaara's changed and all, but he's–"

Kakashi cut the blond off with a serious glare, one that warned him to shut up. "Sakura, what did Tsunade-sama say?"

Her lower lip trembled and tears filled her eyes. "The baby isn't compatible with my body and if I continue with the pregnancy, I'll die during labour – if I even make it that far."

Despite being sat down, both men felt as though the ground had suddenly disappeared from underneath them. On one of her sides, Naruto was trembling and aching and just barely holding back the urge to scream obscenities to whoever was listening up in the sky, whereas Kakashi was silent. He seemed incapable of forming any words or emotions, although there was a look of pain in his single, dark eye.

And he knew her well enough to know where this was going. "You're going through with your pregnancy. Not only because other pregnancies could possibly be the same for you, but because this is your child and you already love it," he murmured after minutes of silence. Sakura nodded shakily. He sighed, closing his eye. "I'm not going to tell you to reconsider, because I know you. I know that you've already begun list after list of all the things that need to be done, so that you can prepare for your baby." Again, she nodded, her breathing hitching as her tears finally started to fall. "Gaara-kun isn't taking the news well, is he?"

"No," she managed to choke out, feeling her throat tighten. "He said… said I'm not acting like a wife, that I'm acting by myself. So he's no longer going to act like my husband." Her arms wrapped around her middle, trying desperately to hold back her need to sob. "In Tsunade-sama's office, he told me th-that he won't accept the child, not if he takes me from him. A-And there's… there's a wall between us now. He's shutting me… shutting me out."

A hand was suddenly giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze and when she looked up, Kakashi was trying his best to smile down at her. "Give him some time, Sakura. Don't forget that if you're not including his siblings, you're the the first person Gaara-kun has completely opened up his heart to. He's afraid of losing you. So, to protect his heart, he's pushing you away, thinking that when the time comes, it won't hurt him as badly to lose you."

Naruto snarled, visibly trembling. "But that's wrong," he roared and immediately shot to his feet. "Sakura-chan doesn't need this stress. She's needs him to be there and look after her the way a husband is supposed to." His breathing was ragged and his eyes were bleeding red, a sign that the Kyuubi within him was getting riled up and taking advantage of his emotions. "If it was me and Hinata in their place, I wouldn't be pushing her away. I'd be making every second count. I wouldn't want any regrets." Suddenly, the red eyes were gone and Naruto was weakly falling to his knees, looking at Sakura with a heartbreaking expression. "I don't want to lose you, Sakura-chan."

After trying so hard to keep back her emotions, Sakura finally couldn't help but collapse against Naruto and cry, trying to comfort him as he comforted her.