"I can't believe it. The Smashers were supposed to be here by now." Master Hand said. Crazy Hand looked up from his game of Solitaire. "You know, maybe we should delay Brawl until we can find out what happened." He suggested.

"Do you know how long the public has been waiting for Brawl?" Master Hand inquired. "Sure I do." Crazy Hand replied, flexing his fingers. "It's just that if the Smash Brothers aren't here, we can't have a Brawl, now can we?"

Master Hand gave a hand-specific defeated expression. "I guess not." He floated a bit closer to the ground, settling himself. "It's just as well. We still haven't managed to find a replacement for the Fighting Wire Frames yet, anyway."

Crazy Hand asked in an annoyed tone, "Then why aren't we working on that right now?" Master Hand burst out in anger, "Because you said you wanted to take a break and play Solitaire!" "Oh yeah." Crazy realized. He quickly lost interest in the subject. "Hey, do you see a red queen anywhere?" Master threw a bootleg copy of Alice in Wonderland at him. "She's in there somewhere."

Crazy threw the DVD off the ledge of the room they were in. The hands had ordered the Delux Strangness model of interview room, so naturally the room was above the least likely thing ever: an incinerator. Master winced as he heard the DVD fizzle and burn out from the heat. Hope no one falls in there. He thought.

He pressed a button to allow in more auditions for the Mysterious Small Fry Enemy Group. A large door opened, flooding the room in light. Many strange beings floated in. They seemed to be made of a dark, gooey liquid. Their forms kept switching from living things to nonliving things. One changed from a lion to a bear. Another turned into a Stalfos. A third turned into a palm tree, and another even became a boulder.

"And you are?" Master Hand asked. In a wet, sloppy voice the entire group answered, "We are the Liquos. We are hive-minded and can shapeshift into any form we please. If we face a foe that has power over fire, we shape to something with water-like characteristics. Crazy Hand said, "Coolness is definitely a ten." "I concur," Master Hand said, "And if they can shapeshift they will most surely be annoying. Ten!"

"Anything else we should know about you?" Crazy Hand asked, paying more attention to his game of Solitaire than the Liquos. "Yes." They replied. "We know perfect teamwork. If there are even two of us, the best fighter would be unable to kill us." "Crap." Master Hand said. "You're just too strong. We would be unable to nerf your power enough to make a Ten-Man Brawl seem fair. Goodbye." Master Hand depressed another button, and the floor sprung out from under the Liquos. They flew from the room. "Next!" Master Hand called.

In stepped five men with soft features, who were wearing nice clothing. Crazy raised his index finger, the hand equivalent of raising an eyebrow. "Who are you supposed to be?" he asked. The tallest man stepped forward. "We're the Rick Rollers. We plan to fight the Smash Brothers with music!" Without even waiting for input from Master Hand, Crazy said, "No." He began throwing bombs at them. They fled the room, screaming. "Next!" Crazy shouted.

This time a bunch of gnomes hopped in. No, not walked. Hopped. They were still attached to their stands. In a French accent that did not suit it at all, a fat gnome said, "Hello, we're the gnomes. I'm the leader, Chompski." "Yeah," Master commented, "We noticed that. So, what do you do?" "Well," Chompski began, "We attack by headbutting our opponents, but can be killed with one or two hits."

Master Hand nodded and said, "Go on. You already have an A in weakness." Chompski continued, "We also have really sparkly elemental attacks that are much more powerful than our normal attacks, but we rarely use them for reasons unbeknownst to us." "Coolness is an 8 out of 10." Master Hand said. "But how are you annoying exactly? You seem to be capable of surrounding the enemy, but the Wire Frames already did that."

Chompski laughed. "We're plenty annoying. Heck, Phillip over there has field experience. He just recently got back from outer space." Master and Crazy Hand would've blinked if they had eyes. "Excuse me?" Master Hand said, confused. Chompski apologized, "Oh, I'm sorry. You see, Phillip was doing other business recently. He managed to sucker this chump named Freeman or whatever into carrying him several miles, just to launch him in a rocket. It was hilarious. We had this huge party, watching Freeman on the monitors. He screwed up so much that we nearly died. Boy, his solution to getting Phil past the ol' chopper was sidesplitting. But I'm getting off topic here. Can we have the job?"

The Hands looked at each other. Crazy shrugged his fingers. Master Hand turned back to Chompski and said, "Yes. Welcome aboard. You start as soon as we can find the Smashers."

Before Chompski could sign the final contract that had instantly appeared, a group of colorful humanoids flooded the room. One was red, and had the physique of Captain Falcon. Another was blue who held the bearing of a princess. There was one that was yellow and had horns. Finally, there was a green one that was not unlike Kirby. The humanoids began beating the gnomes, smashing them together and throwing them off the ledges. Once again the room was above an incinerator. Master Hand's fears were realized.

Once Chompski had fled with the survivors, the four colorful things stepped close to the Hand's desk. "We are the Alloys." The red one said in a metallically robotic voice. It continued, "We would be very obliged if you would allow us to audition."