" ... And now, ladies and gentlemen, let's welcome the Eight Equines!"
Eight cages rose up from their respective holes, carried by a set of robotic platforms.
As these aliens have more hours of energy than Earthlings do, some of them were still here, beholding what manner of violence and torture, and humiliations, come what may, will be anticipated for the rest of the night.
They completely resemble humans, but with light-blue skin, and dark-blue hair. They also seem to have a tendency to eat substances that resemble blackened iron, and some kind of blue glass, which is what they are holding in some sort of paper bucket on their hands, as if it were full of odd-shaped popcorn and cherries and grapes.
"I, Doctor Avtomatos Telephonoi, shall demonstrate to you their strengths, and weaknesses, before your eyes!"
The crowd then cheered on.
"And I shall personally feed them ... (opens box of round and colorful Pills) ... with these."
The cheers were grind to a curious/bored halt. Only the sound of chewing metal and glass, and the whirring of machinery, mortified the silence.
"Those, Êmốn Galaxiakế Aftokratoría, are Pills that enhance, or add towards, their existing abilities. (presents each Pill) This, the green one, can hasten one's speed. The red one enhances strength. The grey ones grant the ability to speak in Vulgar, or Chyíaioi * ... "
Another boring speech. Soon afterwards, the ever-angry, ever-furious, ever-unsatiated, and ever-dissatisfied Kynódontos roared and screamed, and burst towards his deactivated, uncharged cage ... aroused by the smell of Human(oids) .
'(HUMANS! HUMANS! I IS WANT KILL AND EAT DELICIOUS HUMANS! RAAARGH!)'
" ... and finally, the purple one, can give it tremendous extra-ordinary abilities –"
(irritatingly draws out a remote-control-like device, and shoots a blue, fleshy laser at Kynódontos; who immediately freezes in his cage as if he were a furious, raging, and frothing statue made of red horse flesh)
" ... sorry for the interruption. Now, I shall feed the Equines myself."
Putting on some sklérế gloves, and a suit of Anthektikó-Etaireía metal [both of which are very inedible to Avtokratorians like us], he walked gently to the Oktố-áloga.
To the first horse (Blackie, No. 1, of Earth, of U21) :
"To you, Mélanos, shall be the kyanó [cyan] Pill of Knowledge, and Of Effective Leadership (opens box, thrusts Cyan Pill into Blackie's reluctant mouth). NOW EAT IT, YOU WALKING BLACK BAGPIPE!"
[As expected, ] Fifteen minutes of mind-rending headaches ensued to the poor horse, as he snorted and screamed and writhed in pain, as his primitive body forces itself, especially the brain, to accept those unusual gifts. Knowledge? What is that? Lee-durr-sheep? Is sheep, or is 'Lee'?
"Now, Schelmpos-tou-Itiốn, No. 2, (bag of lard,) this is the kókkino Pill Of Strength ... "
And he tortured Shelby in the same manner, and kicked his jugular groove. Yet the technicians, out of a desire to torture him some more, so that he will not die so soon, fired a green ray at it to instantly heal it.
Inky (Melanốdes, No. 3) gets the Blue Pill, which enhances his speed and his DNA-firing ("love-and-tolerance").
Burr-Hurr-Hurr (Oneiropólos, No. 4) receives the Lavender Pill of Análysê, firing up his nerves, synapses, and axons to one-quarters' that of Dr. Avtomatos.
Kynódontos (Phríttô, No. 5) receives the Black Pill of Restraint, which causes him to carefully think before he simply advances to his prey; traps and ambuscades can be everywhere, anywhere, at once.
The idiotic Hurr (Kyklópteroi, No. 6, of U379) receives the White Pill of Caution, that allows him to sense danger (Horses of his kind are so idiotic, they always treat dangerous things as if they were friends and play-mates, and play-things, as well.), and to have a mind of perpetual paranoia.
The savage unicorn from Bohemia, White Streak, (Leukantikó, No. 7, of U576) was given the Olive Pill of Ignorance, causing it to ignore Humans, Avtokratorians, and 1,456 other alien/Humanoid species (unless when commanded or fed). **
Finally, the noble, devoted Pếgasos of ancient Greece, the only one of its kind (No. 8, of U789, the same Universe as Kynódontos), was fortunate enough to not be given anything of the Colorful Pills, or tortured in any way [lest the Hellenic Gods find out, and punish us in our world) .
Except for Pegasus, all Seven Equines were tortured in the same manner (but with different insults, and with Kynó being un-time-frozen after his turn to be tortured), after they were consequently given the Grey Pills of Translation and Knowledge (which Pegasus was also fed with, this time willingly.).
And now, it is time for the Games: a series of tests to demonstrate the Horses' skills.
The Cages sprouted legs, and crawled like giant spiders to the Emperor's row (absent because he is sleeping), and "sat" there in a straight line, facing the Machinery to the Audience's right.
The metallic "Platforms" sank to the Basement, revealing a huge gaping maw, which emitted smoke to "cover" the pieces of the "Platforms" as they disassemble into little, cube-shaped machines that crawl away to some rooms elsewhere. Perhaps newer ones came into the Basement, and assembled into a new stage/Platform, and connected to some Elevator that carried it up, revealing a Stage filled with mazes, platforms, and other things that involve a lot of running, guessing, and other unnecessary skills. [The rest is an irrelevant description].
A bluish force field sudden domed the new Platform/Stage, to prevent any of the Eight Horses from escaping.
The six hoops immediately combusted.
Lasers shot out, creating deathly walls that defined the Mazes.
Some CCTV-cameras morphed into sleek ray guns, enough to zap either one of the Eight Horses, should they ever be careless.
Giant blades were everywhere, swinging like morbid fans, slowly to cut of the Horses' heads, adding to the fun of it all.
Mushroom-like creatures were growling, snarling, waiting to shoot out their poisonous spores at any within three chéria (3.16 meters) of their distance and range. Their poison is incurable, to the standards of Earthling-based equines such as they, and can kill them within 1 nanosecond.
And eight podiums, inside eight new Cages, turned on their lights. ***
This fifteen minute idiocy was followed by a boring set of tests for each individual Horse, after hundreds of black droids swept away and consumed the carcasses. It was also followed by some results: (Predictably,) No. 3 was the most adept, No. 7 the strongest, and No. 8 (Pếgasos) was the fastest.
And now, for the Mind Tests.
One of them is used as an example, due to time constrains by the time of writing [I have to be there for advising younger stratêgói].
All of the Equines were required to answer this question:
"Define; what is 'spaghetti'?"
First, eight plates of spaghetti were served to each horse (Inky's plate comes with a fork and a knife), made with (Earth-based,) horse-harmless ingredients. A picture of the sweet-smelling Human/Earthling food was shown before everyone, specially prepared (and then eaten afterwards) by Mr. Lýsandros.
No. 1: 'It is very delicious.'
No. 2: 'I would like to have some more ... but, sandwiches are better!'
No. 3: " -ahem- Spaghetti is a food consumed, and produced, by the finest chefs in Sisfilly, Istallia, last surviving remnant of the Romane Empire. It is made with durum wheat flour and water. It doesn't have to be tomatoes and all; the wheat flour and water are the basics. It's delicious. (-slurps-) "
No. 4: ' I have no idea from whence this Yahoo grub originated; but it tastes fine with me . '
No. 5: 'I STILL WANT TO EAT HUMANS! EEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HURR-HURR-HURR-HURR!'
No. 6: "Ahahahaha"
No. 7: 'Grass is more good than this strange insect ... '
No. 8: 'I would not even care; grass and ambrosia is still better than this!'
* Chyíaioi resembles the English language.
** [This is especially that unicorns love the smell of maidens, or female Humans who had not "done it" with anyone, and they instantly turn the animals' crazed excitement into slumber, especially if male; as the disgusting equines will sleep, and drool, on her disgruntled lap. They would even fight, and gore each others' throats to death, over just one Human female. On any other Human, it will instantly kill, viewing all other creatures as Monsters. However, on all Avtokratorians, they will be disgusted at our scent, preferring to froth with fear should any one of these idiotic beasts be brought closer to one of ours.].
*** [The following content, some interesting, mostly boring for any description (despite the deaths and charrings, and the infections and zappings, the whoopings of the crowds on watching the foul Equines die horrific deaths, and the horses instantly revived in individually respective pathetic flashes of pale light; how much boring is that compared to any Earthling-type electronic computer game? So boring, you (if you are Avtokratorian, and just a military stratêgós like me) would wish you were there, never to be revived ever again!]
(Stellar-Galactic-Time Captain Protóchromos Chromásthisthes has been suspended for 15 Avtokratorian tri-months for his spam.)
Istallia - www. fillydelphia . com forum / viewtopic. php ?f=13&t=363
