Disclaimer: Don't own.
Warnings: Yaoi. KakaIru. Don't like, don't read. Simple. Probably a little AU.
A/N: Eek! I'm not even going to comment on why this is late… just… the universe hates me I guess… I'm just glad my schedule is finally under control again. Yay! Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers! You have no idea how inspirational the reviews are. They give me warm fuzzies, and get you guys chapters sooner. ^_^
Twenty seven years worth of tears and grief that Kakashi had not allowed himself to deal with, and Iruka could do nothing but watch. Kakashi did not scream, or break things, or do anything Iruka would have expected while going through such a profound mourning process. He simply held Iruka to him as though the chuunin were his last lifeline and allowed his tears to fall freely down his face. He made no noise at all in fact, just cuddled closer as if folding in on himself and cried.
Iruka didn't even notice when Kakashi fell asleep, his mind was too preoccupied replaying the older man's words, dissecting them, and studying. His hand continued rubbing comforting circles on the jounin's back, and he had taken to kissing the silver haired man's head at irregular intervals without even noticing. When Iruka finally became aware of his surrounding once more, he noticed that the shaky sobs had ceased, and Kakashi's breathing was slow and even. The chuunin couldn't help but smile at how the older man was still cluthing onto his shirt and his face was buried in the tan man's chest. Iruka let out a long sigh and leaned his head back to rest against the couch, letting sleep take him as well.
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Iruka woke feeling well rested and content. It took him a good thirty seconds to realize Kakashi had moved from his place on the couch, and he could smell food. The chuunin cracked a curious eye open to see Kakashi sitting cross legged on the chair across from him, eating ramen. There was a bowl placed on the table in front of him as well.
"Morning sunshine." Kakashi teased, Iruka noted that the jounin's smile was the single most beautiful thing he had ever seen, though he wasn't sure if it was because the man simply had an incredibly stunning smile, or if it was just that seeing the man grin like that after such a breakdown was comforting somehow.
He found himself blushing at his own thoughts, and decided to occupy his mind with something else, at least until he had a bit of privacy to think things over. "What time is it?" he asked slowly, his voice still thick with sleep.
"About eleven." Kakashi answered, almost absentmindedly looking out the window as though trying to confirm his statement. Iruka nodded and leaned forward. "Nice nap."
Kakashi chuckled in agreement, but Iruka could sense a bit of nervousness and lingering sorrow there. Iruka had a lot of things he wanted to ask, and many thing he just wanted to say, to get off his chest, but it was late, and Kakashi had been through enough today, reliving his past and finally starting to cope with all the loss. The chuunin wanted to just get up and leave with a polite bow and perhaps a muttered comment about his having school in the morning, but couldn't bring himself to just abandon Kakashi like that.
He cleared his throat and stared at the floor. "I, uh, I have school tomorrow." He said almost cryptically.
Kakashi nodded. "It's late. You should eat something." He gestured toward the steaming bowl of ramen on the table before the brunette. "If you're too tired though, feel free to leave, I don't want to keep you." His voice was smooth, with a slightly bored edge.
Iruka nodded, unsure what to do, but he hadn't eaten since lunch time and the empty ache in his stomach made his decision for him. He grabbed up his bowl and ate slowly after thanking the older man. Kakashi simply waved it off, and went back to his own meal. The two ate in relative silence, making small comments every so often. That atmosphere was comfortable and relaxed, though there was a definite tension that both ignored. There were still so many unanswered questions, and neither wanted to begin answering them quite yet. Everything was still too new, and so much had already been shared.
Iruka finished his meal about half an hour later, setting his bowl back on the table and offering thanks once again. Kakashi, again dismissed the thank you, and stood to take their bowls to the kitchen, when he returned, Iruka was standing looking like he was ready to leave.
"Oi, I'll see you later then Iruka-kun." Kakashi said, his voice was smooth and strangely alluring, which caused a whole new wave a confusion to wash over the chuunin.
Iruka nodded. "Um, yes, I'll see you later…" He repeated heading to the door, and then realizing he was missing his vest. He turned blushing toward where Kakashi had been standing, but the man was no longer there. Kakashi emerged a moment later from the bedroom, carrying Iruka's flak jacket. "Uh, thanks."
Kakashi nodded, and handed the garment over. "Uh… would you, uh, mind if I stopped by your classroom tomorrow after school?" Kakashi had gone back to his stammering attempts at socializing with the teacher.
"I actually have work at the mission desk tomorrow." Kakashi nodded in understanding, and gave a small smile. As an afterthought, Iruka added, "My shift ends at seven if you'd like to meet me there." Kakashi gave an unreadable look, biting his lower lip slighting in contemplation. It was actually rather adorable, and Iruka found himself wanting to kiss those lips again.
Kakashi's answer interrupted the chuunin's thoughts, however. "Um, I had a few things I wanted to talk to you about… uh… preferably without crowds…" Kakashi blushed slightly and looked down at his own feet as though they held the answer to some ancient mystery.
"Meet me there, and we can go back to my place to talk. I owe dinner anyway." Iruka smiled warmly, and Kakashi gave a small grin in return.
"Sure, okay." And with that Iruka headed home to contemplate the night's events, and hopefully find some form of clarity. There was so much he had to think about. What had Kakashi meant by he was the only he had ever done right? And now that they were officially friends was anything going to change? Were they actually even friends? It certainly didn't feel like just friendship, but maybe he was just making more out of it than there was. Maybe his crush was making him see something that wasn't really there. Or maybe not, Kakashi had shared quite a bit with him earlier. Had he ever told those things to anyone else? Given the man's typical demeanor when sharing something so personal, it seemed as though the words had been awfully thought through, as though they had been spoken a thousand times before, but had they been spoken aloud?
Iruka opened the door to his apartment, and mentally groaned. Every time he told himself he was going to get answers to all these pressing questions, he ended up just coming back more confused, and usually didn't even find the answer he had been looking for, just more questions. He slipped off his shoes, and flak jacket unceremoniously, and dropped them on the floor. He was too tired, despite the long nap, to deal with those things right then. He pulled off his shirt, as he walked to the bedroom, dropping it on the floor on his way.
His weapon holsters and pouches clinked to the floor, and he collapsed on his bed with a deep sigh. He wanted to sit and think things over, wanted to know what exactly was going on, but everything was happening so quickly, and he had so many questions that only lead to other questions, and he'd only be able to get the answers from Kakashi himself. They were going to have a talk the next day, sort things out. He'd get his answers. He closed his eyes, and let himself drift slowly to sleep.
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Class the next day was uneventful, probably because his students were still a bit on edge from his mood the previous day, and though he was no longer in his terrible mood, he knew he'd be quick to anger, so it was in their best interest that they remain wary. It was a lecture day, and the practice in the academy training ground would start the next day. Gathering up his things, he headed to the mission room, hoping it would be a slow day.
Iruka entered the missions room, and couldn't help but grin. Anko seemed to be the only person there not working, and the woman practically lived in the place, so it was truly a relief to see the place so empty. Anko was leaning over the desk talking in hushed tones to Genma who was smirking like an idiot. Iruka mentally noted that he was probably just retelling the story of how he got Raidou. Iruka of course, wasn't completely sure if the two men had done anything after going home drunk together, but given the leers Genma had been giving all night, it seemed to be the only logical explanation. When Iruka approached Genma and Anko stopped talking, and looked at him, like they were waiting for him to spill some kind of new gossip that he knew.
"Uh… hi." He said rather awkwardly. How the hell would he know anything about the goings on around town? He'd been stuck in his own little soap opera for that last few days.
"So?" Anko asked, as if Iruka was supposed to know what the hell she was talking about.
"So, what?"
"What's he like?" Genma answered for her.
"What's who like?"
"Kakashi." The two said in unison, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
Iruka stared at them both in confusion. "You know him too."
"What's he like in bed?" Anko clarified, sounding rather annoyed that she had to explain.
"I bet he's good." Genma said with a smirk. "Seems like he would be. He's got that kind of walk you know? Not to mention the control he has in battle, in my experience a ninja's skills in battle are a good way to estimate how they are in bed. Which makes Kakashi…" Genma let out a long high pitched whistle.
Iruka blushed a vibrant red, and stared directly down at his toes. "I have no way of knowing how Kakashi is in bed."
"Right." Anko's voice was dripping with sarcasm.
"I don't!" Iruka's fists clenched. This was not what he needed today. He was already on edge, and now he was embarrassed and frustrated.
"What room did you do it in? Kitchen? And in what positions? How many rounds? How long does he last anyway? I bet he lasts years. Were their toys? He probably has all kinds of interesting toys. Man reads porn in public, he's gotta know how to play."
"Genma. We did not do anything."
"Right. I'm sure you just spent a cozy night on his couch." Genma chuckled. "You can tell me you know. Or I could just get the details from the Scarecrow himself. He'd probably be able to give pornographic detail. Which… suddenly sounds more than a little appealing."
Iruka's anger became a physical presence in the room, threatening to choke Genma with his own testicles if he spoke another word. "We did nothing."
Genma shrugged and turned back to Anko, acting unaffected by the angry man beside him, though the twitchy senbon in his mouth gave away his nervousness. Iruka spent the next four hours of his life listening to all the ways a senbon could play an important role in sexual gratification, which were many… all of which Iruka wished he'd never heard. Anko interjected at several points, giving detailed accounts of why certain things did or did not work well in her experience. In such a case that it did not go so well, Genma was sure to explain where it had gone wrong, and how to correct the problem, adamantly suggesting she try again.
Seven o'clock came around rather slowly, and went by. Genma considered questioning Iruka's staying late when they were so empty, but the glare the chuunin sent him when he opened his mouth to ask told him it was better to just let it go. Kakashi showed up around six thirty. And before the man even made it into the room, Iruka had stood, and was on his way out.
"Yo." Kakashi greeted, in an all around 'hello' to the occupants of the room. Genma nodded with a content smirk, and Anko smiled like a giddy schoolgirl. Iruka glared back at them, taking the hand Kakashi had raised in his greeting and pulling the man out of the room.
"Come on. You don't even want to know what they're thinking."
Kakashi looked back over his shoulder assessing Genma's smile, and decided, he did in fact want to know exactly what the blonde was thinking. It seemed like exactly the kind of thing he wanted to know, but he didn't press the issue. He simply let himself be led away by the obviously flustered chuunin. The man was undeniably sexy when he was flustered. Kakashi smiled rather happily to himself.
"Yeah. I'm sure there's nothing between them." Genma commented when the two men were out of earshot.
"Oh, definitely not." Anko agreed with a roll of her eyes. "They're more obvious than Asuma and Kurenai." Genma chuckled at that, and their conversation drifted into more perverse things, involving the not so secret affair between Asuma and Kurenai.
A/N: Hm. Not my best, but I hope you all enjoy anyway. Sorry it's a bit short, but the next chapter is already half way done. That just seemed like a good place to stop.
