I'm sorry for the wait between updates this time, I didn't want to leave it almost a month but my getting over my illness took longer than I thought and then I was back at work catching up with all the stuff that had happened whilst I was off. This chapter is another one that was supposed to be longer, but if I'd included everything I wanted to it would have been pushing about 12,000 words, and I'm trying to keep the chapters trimmed so they don't become boring! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, followed and favourited it means a lot. I'll be starting work on the next chapter pretty much right away and hope to have it up in a couple of weeks. Enjoy the chapter.
You Call Me A Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing
Chapter 7
Dr Mitchell looked up from his desk as a tentative knock sounded at his door. "Come in."
The door opened and Jesse's nervous face appeared in the gap. "You…wanted to see me sir?"
"Ah yes, Jesse come in!" Benjamin put aside the paper he had been grading and gestured to the chair in front of his desk. "Thank you for coming, I wanted to speak to you about Beca."
"Ok?"
"How has she been?" it had been well over a month since Benjamin had seen or spoken to his daughter, which given the small size of the campus made Beca's avoidance of him something very impressive. There had been time when he had started for her dorm room, but always he had stopped himself before he had gotten too close, his own cowardice holding him back.
"She's doing fine. Well you know as fine as Beca can be being at college." Jesse chuckled weakly, the noise dying on his lips at the professor's small frown.
"Her face, is it…" Benjamin gestured to his own face, the memory of his daughters battered and bruised face still fresh in his mind.
"She's all healed up." Jesse confirmed. "No lasting damage." The boy went back to rubbing his thighs nervously, eyes darting around the room.
"Good, I'm glad to hear it." Dr Mitchell took a breath. "Look, Jesse, usually I would not involve a student in my personal business but I find myself at a loss of what to do with Beca, I haven't spoken to her since the…fight, and truth be told I'm worried."
Jesse took a breath, deep in thought. "I'm not sure it's really my place to get involved sir. Beca is my friend and her trust means a lot to me."
"I understand that, and I would never ask you to betray her trust. But I'm at my wits end at ways to get through to her, to get her to open up to me." Benjamin leant forward slightly in his chair. "Does she ever talk about…it with you?"
"No." Jesse shook his head. "I mean a little bit, when she wants to. But I've tried to broach the subject a few times, she just shuts down."
"I thought as much." Benjamin sighed. "At least she's involved in a group, how is the a cappella going."
"I think it's very good for her." Jesse chuckled dryly. "It's definitely given her…structure and…" Jesse paused, debating whether or not to mention Beca's slowly blossoming friendship with Chloe. "…well she's meeting a lot of new people." He finished, deciding that that qualified as too much information, and not something Beca would forgive him for sharing.
"I'm glad to hear it." Benjamin nodded. "I've heard good things about the Bella's captain, Aubrey Posen it sounds like she is the right person to keep Beca in check."
"She does that!" Jesse muttered.
"Do you think…she would consent to see me?" Benjamin's question was hesitant. "Could you talk to her, convince her to meet me?"
Jesse chewed his lip as he thought. "I can't promise anything." He said finally. "Beca won't appreciate it if she thinks I've gone behind her back, but I will try and talk to her."
"Thank you Jesse, I appreciate it. I won't keep you any longer." Benjamin pulled the paper he had been working on back towards him, a clear indication that the conversation was over, only nodding briefly as Jesse stood and left the office.
Jesse was still deep in thought when he reached the radio station to start his shift with Beca, pondering the ways he could broach the subject of her father.
"Hello! Anybody home?!" blinking in confusion Jesse focused on Beca's waggling fingers in front of his face, realising he had been staring into space for the last few minutes, hand raised in the air halfway to the shelf.
"Huh?"
"Jesus, what is up with you today?" Beca leant against the shelf next to him, a playful smirk pulling at her lips. "You're off in dreamland more than usual." Jesse pursed his lips as he worked out how he was going to tell her about his meeting.
"Your father asked to see me in his office earlier today."
Oh, looks like we're going with the blurting it straight out then.
Beca looked confused at his sudden outburst before her features rearranged themselves into a neutral expression. "What did he want?" she asked flatly, arms crossed over her chest.
"He wanted to know how you're doing." Jesse felt a little unnerved by her calm expression.0
"What did you tell him?"
"Just that you're ok. He wanted to know about a cappella as well, how that was going. Apparently he's heard good things about Aubrey."
"Of course he has!" Beca scoffed. "She's his vision of a perfect daughter!"
"He also wants to know if he can see you." Jesse moved the conversation on hurriedly before Beca could lock into her Aubrey ranting mode. As he suspected his words caused the words on Beca's tongue to die.
"He asked if I would speak to you about it." Jesse continued a little hesitantly moving away from the shelf and back to the table in the middle of the station. Beca's eyes narrowed suspiciously as she followed him and jumped up onto the table, the effect enhanced by her dark eyeliner.
"And…?" she left the question hanging, her tone dangerous. Jesse knew the next words out of his mouth had to be the right ones.
"I'm speaking to you now." He went with finally. "Look, I know it's not my place to say anything about this…"
"No it's not."
"Right, but he's really worried about you Becs," Jesse continued, "I know you're still pissed at him but I really think he wants to try and make amends."
Beca sighed heavily, glancing down at her feet before looking back up at her friend. The hostile look had faded from her eyes to be replaced by one of weariness that Jesse didn't like seeing in someone so young.
"I know he does." Beca sighed again. "I will speak to him, after Thanksgiving." Hopping off the table she disappeared back amongst the shelves, Jesse knew better than to follow her.
The week leading up to the Thanksgiving break was a busy one for Beca, her teachers had decided to pile on no fewer than four assignments all due for the same week and for the first time since she had started college Beca had had to turn down shifts at the radio station in order to get them done. Not for the first, or even hundredth time that year Beca found herself cursing her father's deal, Beca had never excelled at academics, not because she wasn't smart but because she never applied herself long enough to do well. Her mind was always preoccupied with other things, music mostly, the ideas swirled in her head, often eclipsing any academic studies she was supposed to be doing, much to the lasting despair of her father who couldn't understand how someone couldn't be interested in academia.
Bella's practices thankfully had finished a week before Thanksgiving, this was more because Aubrey was needed at home than her actually having any holiday spirit. Her expression when she had announced the previous weekend that this would be their last practice until after Thanksgiving showed exactly how disgusted she was by the idea of an extended break, the declaration spat through gritted teeth.
The Bella's had welcomed the news with exuberance, most talking excitedly about going home to see their families and friends back home. Much of the last practice was spent dissecting what everyone was going to do with their freedom, the only two people not joining in the conversations being Aubrey and Beca. It seemed for the first time since they had met the two enemies had common ground, neither was looking forward to going home.
Beca would be spending Thanksgiving with her mother, her father had offered way back at the beginning of the semester but she had said no before he had even had time to finish making the request. It wasn't that Beca wasn't looking forward to seeing her mother, she missed her a lot, but the idea of being back home left a sour taste in her mouth, too much had happened back there for Beca to ever feel comfortable. But she loved her mother too much to upset her by staying at Barden alone over the holidays.
Beca closed her suitcase, pushing down on the lid to compress the contents before zipping it shut. Heaving the suitcase off her bed she set it down by the door ready for her departure the next morning before flopping down in her chair in front of her laptop.
She had barely slipped her headphones over her ears and pulled up her latest mix when there was a soft knock at the door. Beca's hands stilled on the keyboard, shoulders slumping in frustration, she had been hoping to avoid interaction with anyone before she went home. Jesse had already left and her father knew better than to come to her room, that didn't leave many other options of who could be standing on the other side of the door.
Chloe beamed brightly as Beca wrenched the door open, she seemed unfazed by the usual scowl on Beca's face if anything it widened her smile. "Hi!"
"How do you know where my room is?!" Beca demanded bluntly.
"Your friend, Jesse, he told me before he left."
"When were you talking to Jesse?"
"I found him outside one of his classes to ask him."
"I'll tell Aubrey you've been fornicating with Treblemakers." Beca threatened, the words only caused Chloe to laugh.
"She would never believe you, she knows I would never do that." The redhead breezed past Beca into the room as she spoke.
"Please come on in." Beca grumbled under her breath, wondering not for the first time how it was she kept allowing Chloe to invade her personal space.
"Nice room." Chloe commented as she stood in the middle of the room, turning on the spot. "It's a little bit…bare."
"I don't like clutter." Beca responded, looking pointedly at Chloe hoping she would get the message that the brunette included her in that category at this particular moment. Chloe's eyes were now lingering on the laptop, which still had the music programme open. Beca saw ice blue eyes light up and knew exactly what Chloe was about to do.
In a surprising show of speed Beca darted across the room and planted herself in front of her laptop, the slight fall in Chloe's expression told her that she had predicted the other girl's actions correctly.
"Can I see what you're working on?" Chloe asked politely as if she hadn't just been planning to look without asking.
"No, it's not finished." Beca replied immediately. She didn't like showing people her work, especially when it was a work in progress. The only person who heard anything on a regular basis was Luke, and that was because he liked to know what was going to be aired in his radio station. "Why are you here?" Beca asked to try and distract Chloe from her laptop.
"I wanted to come and say goodbye to you before I went home." Chloe smiled. "You left the last practice so quickly I didn't get a chance too."
This was precisely the reason that Beca had left the practice as fast as she could, to avoid any long winded goodbyes. Beca hated goodbyes, mostly because like apologies she never knew what to say. That and the memory of her father's goodbye still tainted her mind whenever she thought about it.
"You didn't need to come all the way here to do that."
"I know!" Chloe said brightly. "But I wanted too."
"Have you been going to all the other girl's rooms to say goodbye?"
"No." Beca couldn't help but feel a warmth blossom in her stomach at the idea that Chloe had come specifically to see her.
"Where's your roommate?" Chloe looked around the room quizzically at the empty side of the room. "Has she gone home already?"
"I don't have a roommate." Beca grinned, thankful for the distraction.
"How did you manage that?!"
Beca shrugged, turning to her computer. "The day we moved in she walked in, took one look at me and walked straight out again. I guess she must have gone to student services and gotten them to move her and nobody else moved in."
"Clearly she'd heard about your reputation." Chloe snorted.
"Yeah," Beca nodded. "That and I slept with her last year and never called her." Beca shot Chloe a grin over her shoulder as she fiddled with her laptop, shutting down the music programme.
"You are so ridiculous!" Chloe threw her hands up in exasperation. "How do you do it to those poor girls?!"
"Those 'poor girls' know exactly what they're doing when they meet me, they've heard the stories and are usually the ones pursuing me." Beca leant back against her desk, regarding Chloe with a look bordering on smug.
"You're hopeless," the redhead tutted, looking round the room again. "Wait, if you have this room to yourself why haven't you made a double bed yet?"
It was Beca's turn to look around in confusion. "Why would I need a double bed?"
"More room." Chloe said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"I don't need all that much room." Beca pointed out, gesturing to her slim physique.
"What happens when one of your conquests stays over?"
"Oh, we never come back here! And there is definitely no staying over!" Beca shook her head as if the very idea was reprehensible.
"You're such a catch." Chloe deadpanned dryly, prompting Beca to laugh.
"I never claim to be."
"So you've never stayed over with anyone?" at Chloe's question a shadow passed over Beca's eyes, so fleeting that if the redhead hadn't been making eye contact when she asked she would have missed it.
"I don't stay." Was the brunette's reply, Chloe realised it hadn't really answered her question.
"Why not?" she pressed.
"There's no point, if you stay you have to deal with the awkward morning after talk where one person is inevitably like 'oh we should do this again sometime' and it's just weird and much easier to skip over it completely." Beca had moved away from her desk and perched on her bed, leaning back on her hands. "So when do you leave for home?" Beca wanted to deflect attention away from her nocturnal activities, more so because she always seemed to end up telling Chloe more than she intended too.
"In a couple of hours," Chloe settled down on the bed next to her, their thighs mere centimetres apart. "Are you staying here with your dad?"
"God no!" Beca scoffed. "I'm heading back to my mom's for a few days, I leave in the morning." She gestured to her suitcase by the door.
"Won't your dad be lonely?" Beca fought the urge to role her eyes.
"He's got the step-monster to keep him company." She chuckled.
"Who?"
"Shelia. His wife."
"Oh so she's your stepmom?" Beca's scowl returned at the last word.
"No, she's nothing to me." Chloe looked a little taken aback by the ferocity of Beca's tone, but knew better than to push the issue. She did place a comforting hand on the smaller girl's shoulder, feeling the tension running through her body. Beca stiffened briefly but after a few seconds she relaxed a little.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have pried."
"It's fine. I just can't think of that woman in any capacity after the damage she's done to my family." Beca stood up, dislodging Chloe's hand from her shoulder and paced the room, the tension back in her shoulders. She didn't often think of the woman her father had married, she didn't like the wave of irrational anger that built up inside of her whenever she remembered the look on her mother's face when her father had told them that he was leaving them for Shelia. She especially did not want Chloe to see how affected she was by the mere mention of her stepmother's name, so she did what she always did. She changed the subject.
"You looking forward to being home?" Beca was not usually one to venture questions about people's personal lives but she figured the best way to get attention off of her personal life was to transfer it to Chloe's.
As she had hoped Chloe beamed at the question and actually bounced a little on the bed. "I really am!" she gushed. "I love being at home, especially around the holidays, everyone in my family loves being all festive."
"That does not surprise me at all." Beca snorted. "I can imagine nothing worse than a room full of bubbly holiday obsessed Beale's!"
"That was really mean!" Chloe pouted.
"I am mean," Beca retorted. "You should know this by now."
"I'll have you know that being in a room full of my family members is nothing short of awesome! You'll see it one day." Chloe rose off the bed and sauntered towards Beca, a smirk on her face.
Beca arched an eyebrow. "You seem very sure about that."
"Oh I am." Chloe's tone had turned playful as she drew closer, her hips swaying ever so slightly. Beca felt a small jolt in her stomach, her tongue coming out unconsciously to wet her lips as her eyes flickered down to the redhead's hips, mesmerised by the movement. "I told you, we're going to be fast friends. I think I could get you in a room with my family if I tried hard enough."
"There is nothing you could do that would get me to do that." Beca hated how dry her throat was, the words coming out a little hoarse.
"I'm sure I could find some incentive." Chloe purred, she was close now that her last words had been spoken in Beca's ear, breath ghosting over the brunette's neck causing a slight ripple to run through the smaller girl's body. Pulling her head back Chloe caught Beca's gaze and the startling blue of the other girl's eyes had Beca rooted to the spot, she couldn't move even if she wanted to. And in the back of her mind the voice reared its ugly head again, she could see it in Chloe's eyes, she was making no move to hide what she was feeling, it was all laid bare for Beca, raw and unfettered. Lust, excitement, and right there, innocence.
Beca's brain was saved from its inner turmoil by the buzzing of Chloe's phone, the taller girl glanced down, breaking the spell and allowing Beca to take a couple of hurried steps backwards, putting some much needed space between them.
"It's from Bree." Chloe spoke without looking up, already formulating a reply. "I need to leave, she's my ride to the airport and wants to have lunch before we go." Slipping her phone back into her back pocket Chloe looked up, the playful look had disappeared from her eyes and Beca was very grateful because it allowed her brain to get back to normal functions.
"Right yeah, well, I guess I'll see you next week."
"Yes you will. Have a great Thanksgiving Becs." Stepping forward again Chloe enveloped the smaller brunette in a bone crushing head, Beca's head squashed a little uncomfortably in the crook of Chloe's neck. Beca wrapped her arms loosely round the other girl's waist, squeezing gently. Beca had stopped hugging people when she was thirteen but she found that in the last two months hugging had apparently become something she did again, well, hugging Chloe was something she did.
Chloe pulled back after a full minute of hugging with a contented sigh that Beca couldn't help but smile at. Her smile froze as Chloe's lips pressed against her cheek in a lingering kiss. "Happy Thanksgiving." Chloe murmured against her skin, and then she was gone. Crossing over to the door with one last smile before disappearing.
Beca was left standing alone in the middle of her room, her mind a turmoil of emotions and Chloe's kiss still warm on her cheek.
"Thank god it's Thanksgiving."
"There's my girl!" Beca rolled her eyes as her mother's excited voice rose above the din of the arrivals terminal. Sarah Mitchell beamed at her daughter, pulling her into a brief one armed hug and pressing a kiss into her hair. "It's good to see that Atlanta hasn't been able to dim your cheery disposition." Beca's scowl became more pronounced at her mother's words causing her to laugh heartily.
Beca leant her head back against the headrest as the car pulled out of the airport car park and onto the road, sighing deeply she rolled her neck from side to side, attempting to work out some of the kinks that had built up over her flight. She could tell her mother was bursting with questions, but luckily she chose to wait until they got back to the house before she decided to unleash the, Sarah had always been more understanding than Benjamin of Beca's preference for silence.
"So how's this semester going?" her mother's first question didn't come until they were both sat around the breakfast bar in the kitchen, steaming mugs of tea warming their hands.
"Shit." Beca snorted into her tea, wincing as the scalding hot liquid burnt her tongue. "I thought I'd be out by now." She placed her mug back down on the table a little harder than necessary, betraying her frustrations. "He made me join a club!"
Sarah didn't have to as who he was. "Look, Beca, God knows I don't agree with your father at the best of times. He's stubborn and oh so clueless, but I think that he's right to try and push you to do this." Beca looked up sharply, betrayal flashing in her eyes despite this not being the first or even tenth time they had had this conversation. "I know it's not what you want to be doing, I know you want to be out there in LA, 'paying your dues', but I can't afford to get you there and neither can you right now. Your father, as unfair as it is, is your best shot at getting out there, and you're getting a free college education to boot."
"I never asked for a free college education, I've never asked him for anything." Beca stared bitterly into her cup.
"I know you haven't, but he is trying Bec." Sarah's voice was gentle as she laid a hand over her daughters, trying not to feel too hurt when Beca pulled her hand away quickly.
"I don't want him to try. I don't want anything from him."
"I know you don't" Sarah sighed at the childish inflection in Beca's voice, sensing that she was starting to retreat. "Look, why don't you go and get settled, unpack and I'll make us some food."
Beca collapsed onto her bed with a heavy sigh, rubbing her eyes wearily. She hated travelling, it always left her feeling drained and irritable, well, more irritable than usual. Despite her fatigue she was glad to be away from Barden, there was only so much of the campus and the people there she could take. A break from Aubrey's strenuous cardio regime was a big plus, although Beca had a sneaky suspicion that the blonde captain wanted them to keep up the regime at home, which she was going to dutifully ignore. Beca fully intended to spend her time at home sitting down as much as possible, moving only for food and drink.
Beca had come upstairs with the intention to unpack, but now that she was lying down she could feel her eyelids growing heavy as the urge to nap grew stronger. She was just drifting off when her phone buzzed sharply against her thigh, supressing a sigh Beca retrieved her phone from her pocket.
Chloe [14:25]: Hope your flight went well and you got back ok!
It appeared that Chloe was an emoji person, because there were no fewer than six different faces and pictures after the text. Including, for reasons known only to Chloe, a monkey covering its face with its paws. Usually the use of that many useless smiley faces would have annoyed Beca and she would have vowed to delete the offending people's number and never have any more contact with them, but for some reason with Chloe all she could muster was a slight tut and almost fond shake of her head. Whether this was down to genuine affection for the redhead or the realisation that deleting Chloe's number and not speaking to her would have literally zero effect Beca didn't know and she wasn't in a hurry to examine it either.
Sarah's voice drifted up the stairs, calling Beca down for food and breaking her train of thought. Shaking her head Beca tapped out a quick reply.
Beca [14:28]: I did thanks. You too.
Tossing her phone back onto her bed Beca headed for the door, hoping that her mother wasn't going to try and engage her in conversation about her father again, she was tired enough.
Sarah didn't try and broach the subject again until after dinner on Thanksgiving two days later. It had been a small affair, just the two of them, Sarah had never dated after Benjamin left, she couldn't bring herself to. Beca knew that despite hating him for leaving and betraying the two of them her mother would always love her father, effectively stopping her from being with anyone else. It was just another in a long list of reasons that had Beca to despise the man who was her father in name only.
"I'm to believe you've joined an a cappella group?" her mother's question caught Beca a little by surprise.
"Uh, yeah. How did you know?" Beca had avoided mentioned the Bella's in their sporadic phone calls.
"Your father told me."
"You're speaking to him!"
Sarah nodded. "On occasion. I need to know that my daughter is ok, god knows you don't tell me anything."
"I tell you what you need to know!" Beca bit back defensively.
"I don't just want to know the bare basics Bec, I want to know what's going on with you. I want to know when things are going well and when they're not. Why didn't you tell me about this group?"
"Because I didn't want to join it. I only did because of his stupid deal!"
"I think it's a good thing, it'll help you meet some new people, get out of your own head for a change." Sarah reasoned. "What's the group like, are the other girls nice?"
"I guess some of them are ok." Beca shrugged, an image of Chloe flashing in front of her eyes before she could stop it. "The captain is a bit of a bitch though."
Sarah raised her eyes at Beca's profanity but didn't comment on it. "And the radio station, how are things going there?"
"They're fine, I've been doing some of the late night shows for Luke, he's letting me play my mixes."
"That's fantastic Beca!" Sarah grinned and reached over the table to squeeze Beca's hand. A smile stretched Beca's face for less than a second at her mother's praise. "It's a move in the right direction. I think college is really good for you."
Beca snorted. "I'm tolerating it until the end of the year and then I'm gone." Sarah couldn't help the hurt look that crossed her features at her daughter's hurry to get as far away as possible. Beca seemed to notice it and she sighed. "I don't mean it like that, you know I love you, but I need to be away from here, I need to be in LA. I can't…" she stopped and took a moment to compose herself. "…I can't stand this place, there's too much here. And Barden is just as bad, with dad and the step monster." She looked around the room and bit her lip, trying not to allow her emotions get the better of her.
"Beca…" Sarah wanted to reach over and comfort her, hold her, like she would have done when she was a little girl. But Beca had stopped responding to that a long time ago, her little girl had gone, and in her place was the closed off, angry young woman who sat opposite her. "I know it's difficult here, and it means so much to me that you came back, but the demons you have here will only stay as long as you let them."
"What do you mean?" Beca's eyes narrowed.
"You wrap yourself in the past like a blanket, and until you throw it off and let it go then you'll never be able to move past everything."
"You sound just like him." Beca said shortly, brows knitting in a scowl that had become all too familiar to her mother.
"Well, maybe if we're both saying the same thing you should listen." Sarah sighed. Beca gave a quiet snort in response, swigging from her beer bottle. "Please Beca, I know what you think of your father and trust me I do understand, but eventually you have to let go of that anger."
"I have."
"No you haven't. You're still angry at your father, you're angry at me, you're angry at yourself and…" Sarah hesitated. "…her."
Beca's head snapped up at her last word. "Mom." She warned.
"You don't wanna talk about it, I get it, but you refused to keep seeing the therapist and that's not healthy." Beca continued to glare across the table at her, but Sarah carried on. "You can't go through this life pushing everyone away, especially not after what you went through, it wasn't your fault…"
"Enough!" Beca was on her feet and yelling. "I can't deal with this right now."
"Then when can you?" Sarah pressed rising to her feet, her eyes pleaded with her daughter. "Please Bec, I only want to help you but I can't do that if you won't let me in. And your father too."
This was the last straw for Beca. "I am so done talking about this!" with one final glare she turned on her heel and left the room, grabbing her jacket on the way out. Her mother was left standing at the table, palms down on the wood and head bowed in silent defeat.
Beca stormed away from the house, hands thrust angrily in her pockets, palms clenching and unclenching against the material as she resisted the urge to throw a punch at the nearest hard object. She didn't have a destination in mind and allowed her feet to lead her where they would as she mumbled fiercely to herself.
She had expected this conversation ever since she had come home two days previously, it was a familiar argument and always panned out the same way, with Beca storming off. She knew that she was probably being unfair on her mother, none of what had happened had been her fault, and if anything it was only because of her that Beca got through it in the first place. But Beca couldn't open up the way her mother wanted her to, because she had spent so long locking away all of the negative and traumatising memories that talking about them would be opening the floodgates and Beca wasn't sure she was strong enough to deal with the fallout.
Beca had never liked opening up to people, she hated the vulnerable state that came with baring your soul to another person, no matter how close you were to them. Her mother was about the only exception to this rule but Beca's days of sharing with her had ended long ago, it wasn't that she didn't trust her, her mother was about the only person in the world that Beca did trust. Beca just couldn't face the idea of ever being that vulnerable and scared again. She had done it before with someone.
And it had damn near killed her.
Predictably, Beca's feet led her to a bar, which, despite the holiday was full of drunken patrons. Beca realised she shouldn't have been too surprised, people came together to be with their families around the holidays, but a lot of people quickly realised that they didn't actually like their families, so they naturally turned to other things to make them happy, alcohol. Beca wondered how many people in the bar, like her, were there because of arguments. Small ones, big ones, some that meant nothing, and others that meant everything. Harsh words spoken in a moment of irrational anger that had the power to do irreparable damage, whilst others would be forgotten by morning.
Beca slipped through the crowds of people, ducking skilfully under the arm of one man who was brandishing a tray of shots like it was a trophy. By the time she reached the bar she was ready for a shot herself and with surprising ease was able to flag down the barmaid and order herself one along with a bottle of beer, she downed the shot immediately, a slight wince creasing her features as she chased it down with a swig of beer. Turning away from the bar she cast her eyes round the room, looking for somewhere to sit, not that there were many spaces. There were people everywhere, some talking, some laughing, and some sitting in the contemplative silence that only comes from too much alcohol.
She ended up standing in a small corner of the bar, watching as she sipped at her drink. The bar was loud and hot, a lingering scent of sweat hanging in the air that had Beca wrinkling her nose slightly whenever she took too deep a breath in. Most people were in high spirits, laughing and joking with each other, stumbling up to complete strangers and engaging them in conversation. Beca was lucky that the near permanent scowl on her face helped deter even the most festive of patrons, most people seemed to be giving her a wide berth, which suited her fine.
Her first beer went down quicker than she had expected, her mind preoccupied with the lingering reminder of the fight with her mother. The thought of the argument mixed with other memories, memories that always became so much stronger when she walked these streets. Images from her teenage years which she wished she could put away in a box and forget about, but the harder she tried the stronger they became.
Her mother's comments about holding onto the past had stung particularly fiercely, Beca was very aware of her own shortcomings, she just didn't like them being reminded of them.
Her bad mood even fouler, Beca drained the dregs of her beer and began pushing back towards the bar, desperate to get more alcohol in her system to try and numb the anger, remorse and sadness that were all fighting for attention inside her brain.
As she slammed her second empty shot glass down on the bar Beca felt a pair of eyes watching her, glancing upwards she found herself on the receiving end of a sly smile. The owner of the smile was a redheaded woman, hair curled in perfect ringlets down by her shoulders. Her face was thin and angled, with a sharp jawline, bright red lipstick in stark contrast to her pale skin and pale blue which regarded Beca with a lustful gaze. Her first thought was that the other woman's hair wasn't as bright or nice as Chloe's, her second thought was wondering why that was her first thought.
"What's a hot thing like you doing out by yourself on Thanksgiving?" the redhead purred, running the tip of her finger lazily round the rim of her glass.
"I could ask you the same thing." Beca replied, leaning casually against the bar and looking the woman up and down.
"I'm waiting."
"For what?"
The woman leant closer to Beca, a devilish smirk playing on her full lips. "An opportunity." Her voice was low and full of promise as it ghosted over Beca's cheek.
"Well, in that case, let me take this opportunity to buy you a drink." The redhead threw her head back and laughed, her right hand closing briefly around Beca's wrist, but not before her fingers had trailed against the soft skin. "Same again?"
"Please." Beca turned her attention back to the bar, a smirk of her own on her lips.
Her evening was looking up.
"Do you wanna get out of here?" at Beca's whispered question, the redhead chuckled against her lips, tongue flicking out to caress Beca's tongue.
"That's an opportunity I can't pass up." She replied huskily before taking Beca by the hand and pulling her out the door before she could say anything.
"Your place or mine?"
"Yours." Beca grunted as she all but ripped open the door to a taxi and allowed the other woman to slide in. The redhead quickly informed the driver where they were going before her lips were attached to Beca's again, surprising the brunette with her enthusiasm.
It was a short ride to the redhead's flat and before Beca knew what she was doing they were falling through the front door of the older woman's flat, lips and tongues moving together and hands roaming. Taking charge Beca slammed the redhead against the nearest wall, smiling at the moan the action produced, spurred on by the alcohol she dragged her lips down the redhead's jaw and throat as her hands deftly slipped unbuttoned her blouse. The garment was soon discarded, landing somewhere between the coffee table and the sofa, as the women moved away from the wall and into the bedroom, falling onto the bed heavily.
"Oh god!" the redhead arched her back as Beca's hands trailed down her body, followed closely by her lips. "Beca!" her voice was husky and thick with want. Beca couldn't remember when she had told the other woman her name, and she certainly didn't remember hearing a name in return, but none of that mattered with the alcohol coursing round her system as her lips passed over the woman's hipbone, biting the skin softly as she rid the redhead of her jeans, smiling when she saw the black lacy thong they revealed.
It was as she was starting to kiss back up the woman's body that she looked up and made eye contact with pale blue eyes and Beca was struck again by the thought that they weren't quite as blue, quite as electric as Chloe's, the woman's smile wasn't as bright, her face not as flawless.
Wait? What the fuck?!
Beca froze, her mouth just above the redhead's stomach, mind reeling. Why was she thinking about Chloe? She had much better things to be concentrating on right now, so why couldn't she get the bubbly redhead's smile, and her bright eyes out of her head as she placed a couple of hesitant kisses against the pale skin of the other woman's stomach. Glancing up again she was met with the confused pale blue eyes, that morphed quickly into ice blue ones.
"Is everything ok?" Beca shook her head and sat back on her haunches, her drunken brain trying to process what was happening. "What's up?" the unnamed redhead pushed herself up onto her elbows, watching her curiously.
"Nothing…it's…nothing." Looking down at the half naked woman in front of her Beca came to an ugly realisation, the realisation that the only reason she had chosen to go home with this woman was because she had a passing resemblance to Chloe.
Well fuck.
"I have to go!" Beca stumbled over her words as she stumbled off the bed, hunting for her shoes which had been kicked off in the trip to the bed. Disgust welled up in her throat, heading for the door she threw it open, ignoring the confused calls of the redhead.
Almost falling out the front door of the apartment block Beca set off at a run up the road, desperate to put as much space between the flat and her as she could. She didn't stop running until her lungs were screaming for air and she was doubled over, hands steadying herself on her knees, breath coming out in ragged pants. Only when she could breathe properly did she look up and take stock of her surroundings, she was in the parkland that stretched near her house. She had spent many hours here playing as a child, climbing the trees, and then falling out of them, the fond memories almost brought a smile to her face. But then she remembered why she had been running and the almost smile vanished.
Still slightly out of breath Beca started to walk through the park, thankful for the clear air that was helping to penetrate the drunken fog in her brain. Taking deep lungful's of air, she closed her eyes and coming to a stop she allowed the cool night air to caress her cheeks, when she opened her eyes the world looked a little more in focus and her brain seemed to working at a more reasonable pace.
Sinking down onto the nearest park bench Beca contemplated the implications of the last hour, taking home a girl was nothing new. But Beca could never recall a time where she had left before sex had taken place, that was a new, and unsettling development.
She hadn't meant to go home with the girl because she looked a little like Chloe, her subconscious had made that decision for her, a decision that she wasn't happy with. The bubbly a cappella girl had wormed her way into her head it seemed, and the thought of that brought a scowl to Beca's face and a cold sweat to her palms.
She was overreacting and she knew it, so what if she ended up going home with a girl who looked like Chloe? That shouldn't have stopped her from having sex with the woman, Chloe was an attractive girl and just happening to find someone who looked a little like Chloe and finding them attractive was no big deal. It shouldn't have phased Beca at all, let alone made her bolt from the room like some frightened rabbit.
It was the alcohol.
Beca greeted this train of thought with a firm nod of her head, it was the alcohol that had her freaking out, Chloe wasn't in her head in any way.
It was at that moment that her phone started ringing loudly, the tone piercing the quiet that had been allowing Beca to think. Pulling her phone out of her pocket Beca almost groaned out loud when she saw Chloe's name flashing on the screen.
"Figures." She muttered, contemplating not answering the call. Growling softly after a few seconds of indecision she hit the answer button and raised the phone to her ear.
"Hello."
"BECA!" Beca flinched and held the phone a few centimetres away from her ear as Chloe's loud voice almost deafened her. "Happy Thanksgiving!"
"Happy Thanksgiving." Beca's voice held no enthusiasm, but Chloe didn't seem to notice.
"Are you having a good time?" was Chloe's next question, the slight slurring of her words telling Beca just how drunk the redhead was.
"It's been ok."
"Just ok?! Why what's happened?" Beca's eyebrows raised in surprise, a half smile pulling at her lips when she realised that Chloe deemed an ok day to be a bad one.
"It's nothing. Just a fight with my mum that's all." Once again Beca blamed the alcohol as the reason that she told Chloe anything, carefully ignoring the fact that whenever she was sober she seemed to end up telling the redhead more than she wanted too.
"What about?" Chloe was shouting to get herself heard over the sounds of a raucous party that seemed to be happening around her.
"It was nothing big, just usual parent stuff." Beca brushed the question off. "What's going on?"
"Oh, it's the Beale Thanksgiving party!" Chloe giggled drunkenly. "Everyone is here! Say hi to Glen!"
"Who the hell is…"
"Glen! Say hi to Beca!"
"Hi Beca!" A man's voice, equally as slurred as Chloe's, and just as loud bellowed in Beca's ears and before she could even think about formulating a scathing reply he'd gone and Chloe was back on the line, laughing loudly.
"Did you say hi?!"
"Sure. Why have you called me Chloe?" Beca sighed, exasperatedly.
"Because I wanted to talk to you." Chloe's voice sounded a little hurt, and Beca felt bad.
"Right, well thanks. Have you had a good day?" For some reason she didn't like the idea of Chloe being upset and wanted to make up for it.
"It's been great!" Chloe's bubbly voice was back and Beca resisted the urge to roll her eyes at how quickly Chloe could bounce back to being happy, it was a mystery to Beca how someone could be that upbeat and happy all the time. She was lucky if she managed 5 smiles a day, and most of them were sarcastic. "We've had so much food, played games and had drink." Chloe lowered her voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "I'm a little drunk."
"No way!" Beca gasped in mock surprise. "I couldn't tell."
"Are you being sarcastic?"
"You got me." Chloe giggled and Beca bit her lip to stop herself from smiling at the sound, she didn't want to admit that hearing the redhead laugh often made her want to smile.
"I like you." Chloe's next words had Beca slowly releasing her lip from between her teeth, a confused frown creasing her brow.
"What?"
Chloe was silent for a second before she repeated her words. "I like you Beca, and I'm gonna learn all about you."
"Oookkayy." Beca didn't know what to make of the sudden change in conversation.
"I mean it, all that mystery, that, that moody façade, I'm gonna get past it." Chloe's voice had an assured confidence to it that had Beca arching an eyebrow.
"You are?"
"Yep." Chloe loudly popped the 'p' before letting out another drunken giggle. "It's going to be a challenge; your walls are so high Bec." She paused and when she spoke again her voice had taken on a husky tone that Beca couldn't deny was sexy as hell. "But I like a challenge, and I'm very good at climbing, so get ready Bec because I promise that I will get over them."
Before Beca could say anything else there was a high pitched scream on the other end of the line, it sounded like a small child. Chloe garbled out a quick goodbye and hung up as Beca was still trying to process what had just happened.
Lowering her phone slowly from her ear, Beca let out a breath she didn't realise she had been holding in. Her conversations with Chloe always seemed to leave her either feeling confused, irritated, amused, or completely unsure how she felt at all. The most recent conversation had been confusing to say the least, mostly because Chloe was clearly drunk and Beca wasn't sure how much of it the other girl would remember in the morning.
There had been a moment at the end of the exchange however, when Chloe's voice had sounded clear and focused as she had promised to get over Beca's walls. The promise which had sent a slight shiver down Beca's spine, a shiver not unlike the one she had experienced in her second meeting with Chloe in the shower stall.
Chloe had made it her mission to get over Beca's defences, and Beca was sorely tempted to let her try.
The idea scared the shit out of her.
I hope you enjoyed that! Please do leave me a review letting me know what you thought! Until next time.
Pirate-x-Girls
