Yay! I ended last chapter how I wanted to. So recap: Sasha has an old friend again. Annie overheard what Ymir said about James watching her, James himself has tried to help Eren with his gear, and now has a spar with Annie to look forward to. A big part of James past will get revealed in the middle of this chapter. Also, this will be updated every day to 3 days at the longest. I'm really anxious to get this stuff written down on here, so bear with me on how fast it's updated. And so, Let Us Begin.
Well nearly 2 years have passed and it's crazy to see how far this story has come from mere 1.5 and 2k chapters which I had to really ration out how they went, to chapters past 10k that cover entire episodes of the anime. Well this is just a secondary authors note since I've been revising most of my stories, and since i out this one on Ao3 where I've had great success. This hss been revised, extended, and even partially rewritten entirely. So tell me what you all think of the chapter.
Training- Broken Gears and Solid Girls
Everyone was watching as Eren Jaeger was hoisted up yet again, to see if he had what it took. To see if he would be able to remain with the rest of them or forced to leave because he's unable to use the gear necessary for being in this military. It had started out smooth, and seemed like he had finally gotten it. James actually chuckled, Eren's face was so joyful... that is, until he flipped over to his back yet again. Slamming his head into the unforgiving ground and earning himself a grunt of pain. Everyone's face fell a bit, James, Armin and Mikasa's the most until Shadis said something unexpected to Jaeger.
"Switch your equipment with Cadet Wagner's. Now".
Confusion began to spread like a fire. Why would the instructor ask that? But despite the unexpected instructions, the two complied as they undid their belts and swapped them out for each others until Shadis gestured for the one Eren had given over to Thomas. James was starting to put it together as was Armin, when Eren was hoisted back up and balanced in the air just fine.
'So, he could do it, he just had broken equipment the whole time.' James realized before he cheered with the rest, glad that the kid had what it took. He was kinda proud, he saved him back then 2 years ago wben he was unable to do anything, and in return the guy now wanted to fight for the freedom of others. And with the drive he had, James was confident that he could call him a warrior at heart.
Now, as that bit of drama was over, he turned to leave for the rest of tge hour before lessons would begin when he caught Annie staring at him. James noticed that she didn't look as bored this time as she did yesterday, but still the blonde quickly turned away from him. James smiled a little at that, He kind of liked the way she looked at him, or rather pretended not to. Hopefully tomorrow when combat training began, she might open up a little more to him. She had talked to him quite a bit yesterday, even if it wasn't very long he could tell she enjoyed it when he brought the subject around to close combat. He had a better understanding from what he saw from her so far, but he was still interested to know more.
As the day dragged on with the standard classroom lessons as well as ODM training, James found himself talking to Sasha and Connie most of the time so far when they wrre away from instructors. They mostly told stories about home, or at least Sasha and Connie did with each other. James only talked about home when he was with Sasha in Dauper. He didn't talk about the home he tried to go back to, both Because he didn't want to go into how he was raised nor possibly giving away the fact that he dould become a 17 meter nearly unstoppable killing machine. Sasha also tried to steer Connie away from asking James about Shinganshina, Because from what she heard on the first night many people crowded around Eren and he didn't seem to enjoy that much. And since James did actually lose his family during the catastrophe, she would do whatever she could to spare him having to think about it anymore than he might, unfortunately.
As all the talking kept on going, Sasha not have noticed it yet, but James knew that Connie liked his adoptive sister. He could see by how nervous the bald boy would be when she got a little too close to touching his skin in training, or how Connie grinned whenever she laughed at his jokes, even if they weren't the best. At this James found himself feeling an unfamiliar but warm feeling, since he was very unsed to this sort of interaction with others. He didn't have nearly any friends growing up, hell he socialized with the animals he lived in close proximity to more than he did actual people.
Sure he talked with people every now and then when he grew up in shinganshina, whenever he went with his parents to get food or supplies they mightve needed. But he didn't get to run around with other kids who enjoyed fun time with their friends. And when he went to Dauper there wasnt very much of a village to begin with, but more of individual homes that were close to each other but not close enough to be called a village per say. So he only really knew Sasha and her Pa, and was attempting to make nice with the other cadets here. So far it's been smooth enough, and because he was tge observant type, he's gotten a good grasp of those he's come to train with for the most part.
James thought Connie was alright in his opinion. Sure he talked alot, and wasn't exactly the brightest of the recruits, but he seemed like he had his mind set in the right direction. He was there for his teammates if they needed him during the ODM tests in the forest, so it was good that he was light but steady on his feet. Sasha too was fast on the gear which reassured him that she was capable, even though the red head tried showing off like the others. But all the recruits were overshadowed by the top 3 rig users of their class so far.
The top were Mikasa, the stoic dark haired girl he saved along with Eren 3 years ago. Then there was the more arrogant smartass as well as horse faced guy named Jean, and finally it was James himself. James was the most natural with the gear although he wasn't the fastest. But when he used it, the boy moved through the air like a fish in water, fluid and deliberate. To him it was like flying, which he missed because he couldn't shift with anyone around here. And if he was still here for the full 3 years, then it would be quite a while before he did it again. In a way it brought back memories of his time outside the walls. Some were alright, and others were not. He'd have to sneak away sometime and feel the warmth again, but that could also be troublesome in the future if he ever gets caught
James was a bit scared to change again, deep down. It has been about a month since his last transformation, since he had to remain incognito and blend in before he could find a recruiter office. Can't exactly shift back from a titan and just appear in front of an officer without getting a gun drawn on you. Not that it would kill him, shifter healing and all, but he would be revealed for all to see. When he had left what used to be home years ago, he wandered throughout the interior of Wall Maria as a messenger of sorts for a short time to warn people of the breach. He used his Titan form to move quicker than the army, flying most of the time, to the districts in a day at most. James would still have to shift back and walk the rest of the way, but he did his job. He still had to be careful about who might see him, he didn't want to create rumors about a flying Titan. People would go crazy, paranoia would spread about the safety of the cities not being able to stop him. Especially since they were true.
Of course, James no intention of harming anyone, but it would've been easy to. That said, he did defend himself from a trio of scouts who took him for an abnormal once when he wasn't flying. He didn't kill them, but they didn't get off so easy when they insisted on attacking him. He grabbed them as they tried to slice his protected nape, and rolled them lightly on the ground. They weren't killed, but a little roughed up. He did it once more when they tried again, and this time he snarled as he held one to his eyes.
They got the message loud and clear: "I could've killed you twice already.Try again and I will". After thaf he fled for a full hour in order to get far away from any reinforcements. If he'd been cornered he might've had to play dirty, and that would out him as an enemy like the Armored and Colossal. Those bastards. In order to hepp keep his sanity together enough to stay alive, James had taken on many habits to distract himself in the days shortly after the fall. He liked to jog sometimes, and had to when he saw Survey corps out patrolling. He couldn't risk being spotted in the sky, so he kept his body on the earth. He felt the days blur until all cities and many villages were finally warned of the incoming danger.
Then, he went off to be on his own.
James lost a large piece of his humanity that day, when he'd buried the corpses of his actual family. He really had nowhere else to go at that point. Sasha was pretty close to him, she'd been like family, but couldn't go back to Dauper, he was actually exiled from there for a needed act of killing a man, (murder in their eyes but necessary justice in his own.). His home here was in ruins, so he did the first thing that came to mind. James went somewhere entirely new, and so He wandered for 3 years in the wilderness, outside of the walls. In the land where no humans lived, only the mindless. He always made his way back to a forest of giant trees for sleep, and didn't stop climbing until he was at the top of the canopy. The rest of the time when he would relax he was more than fine just laying about on the middle branches, which were still a ways off the ground and far enough from the mindless for his safety.
He fed off of deer and whatever wildlife he could find, and drank from rivers rather than ponds, although he did bath in the later. He spent most of his time in his other form, mainly using it to kill any titans nearby and even searching some out for a good hour or so just to have something to do. He held the feeling of power that came with his titan like a lifeline, because it gave some comfort in his time alone. Again he had exiled himself from everyone else. But this time, He didn't want to be with the rest of the refugees or deal with them, and feel more of an outsider then he already was. He isolated himself, but wanted company. 'Oh the irony.' He used to think to himself as he lay staring at clouds or titans in the distanc as the made their way towards him, drawn by the need to feed on him.
After a time though, He actually began to feel like his Titan in a sense.
It wasn't a huge urge nor was it too apparent in the beginning, but ut just slowly nmfelt numb The primal desires became all too natural, always the first instincts rather than thinking of things first. He had always had a sense of it being a part of him like a second skin just underneath, but he began to think like how his did at times. He found himself eager to fight, even if he was tired. He had liked fighting before, but he hadn't had the bloodlust behind it... until he had lost his family. He felt as if nothing grounded him to humanity anymore, but his rational side fought on. Yet, He ate more like an animal when he was in his human form. He began to kill titans with less skill and deliberate intent, and more with savagery, simply for the pleasure it gave him. He'd begun to lose himself to his own instincts. And then he had met the reason his mind was where it was now. Cool and calm, yet with the same power as his bestial side. Not the same as before, but nowhere near the primal mess he was slowly turning into.
He'd met him. It.
It had been a boring day almost a year and a half after the wall had fallen. Very small titans walked near and clawed the base of his home tree, the highest only 6 meters which compared to his nearly tripled hight meant he could care less about what they did. He hadn't payed them much attention, until something caught his eye. A tall Titan, about 19 meters had lumbered out from a thicket of trees that were close to the one he was holding up in. It was definitely different, it's hairy hide, long limbs and small head showing James that this was completely new. Not even his parents had prepared him for a titan that looked like this. It watched him, and while James was concerned at first that it would climb up to him with those long arms of it's, it did something that still shocks him to this day. It spoke. A Titan, an unusual one, but a Titan had spoken to those around it.
"On Your shoulders."
The thing ordered with a deep voice full of authority. James had thought his mind was playing tricks on him, until much to his amazement did the titans do exactly as they were commanded. Or at least they tried, since they weren't intelligent at all, and meant they weren't very coordinated for a task like this. All they knew was chase, eat, and walk. But still the small titans tried climbing on top of another like small children or puppies would in a pile.
James had a slight sense of panic creeping up on his mind now. They couldn't reach him by any means, but the fact that one could give orders and think made James anxious. Dealing with something that acted on instinct alone was easier to deal with than something that displayed complex, damn. ear human like thinking like he'd just seen. Seeing no other option of escape since the limbs on his tree weren't close with many others at this level, James transformed by biting his hand. Like every other time he had done this simple act, he had a goal in mind: Fight.
Flesh and tendons melded together around bones that began to take shape seemingly right out of the air. Soon after each layer finished his tough and scaly but flexible skin wrapped and covered eveey part of his body minus his eyes and scalp. Feeling the familiar but soothing sensation of power coursing through his body, James outstretched his limbs and began climbing a ways down with his face towards the ground like the mythical lizard he resembled in this form. A Dragon, he came to learn after reading a story or two at night time. His father had jokingly called him one and he didnt understand until he'd seen a drawing of one. And after seeing the things that the fearsome beast and his titan shared, he found himself liking the comparison.
James kept his grip on the massive trunk of the tree, and slowly got closer to the threat below. His claws held him in place, and He stopped just about ten meters from the group of titans. James opened his mouth and gave a fierce shriek to challenge the haired one directly. His calls always drew in the mindless, but James wanted to fight that one because if he could drive it off, then maybe it would take the mindless with it. But to janes disappointment the hairy creature watched with amusement at the display, and held it's composure. Almost as if James wasn't even a fly to swat away, which made James more wary because of how confident the Beast was.
It then picked up one of the smaller ones and hurled it at James.
James barely dodged since he hadn't been expecting it, but wasn't hit. The small titan flew past him and crashed into the trunk of atree farther back with a sickening crunch, and fell limp to the ground before steaming and evaporating away. James was shocked at the brutal action, and that none of the other mindless acted as if anything had happened to one of their own, which told James that whatever the hell this thing was, it held complete controo over them. He grew angry at being toyed with, and leapt down to another branch and gripped it before he heard it speak again.
"I must admit that hair of yours is quite different, just like the rest of you. You act like a rabid animal... Hmm, and they call Me the 'Beast Titan'. Is that why you're so far from your precious village boy? Banished for being a beast?" It asked with dark amusement. James was confused about the village part, he was far outside the walls.
'What village does he mean?' The rest, insult included, made him pause. He realized only now thathe let his anger lead him into making a bad move: he was closer to the ground than he should be. Grabbing distance. James quickly climbed back up a bit more to be out of arms length of all the assailants, growling at the self proclaimed 'Beast Titan'. 'He's got longer arms than even me, but his weight and size might slow him from dodging. The other small pissants I can deal with easily, but this guy, he's smart. He's gonna take effort to beat.'. He thought to himself the longer he stared right into the Titan's yellow and black eyes.
James took a few moments but finally came up with a strategy, and jumped from the tree to near the stack of small titans. He threw a leg out and swiped at the lowest one, breaking it's legs and part of its waist from the vicious blow and bringing their 'tower' down with one simple move. As they tried to get up, he swiftly ripped and crushed their napes in his hands. One got up and tried to jump him, but James merely grabbed it in his jaws and bit down, crushing and severing the nape from the rest of the body. He spit out the carcass, but swallowed the flesh in his mouth. All the while, the Beast Titan had watched like an owner would a dog that caught a bird or a treat.
The mere thought of such a view made James angry. Strangely, He wanted it to have some reaction to his skills. He wanted to be acknowledged as the Predator he was, the killer he.. wait... what? 'What am I saying? I'm not a killer.'
'Yes you are' a small voice told him in his head. It sounded just like his own thoughts, but he never disagreed with his thoughts like this voice had just done. So what was it? 'No I'm not' James declared and It replied yet again to him.
'Your a killer James, but what's so bad about that? Do you not kill to survive, just like everything else?'
James shook his heard to clear his mind from the strange thoughts, he needed to stay focused on the threat in front of him. If He got distracted then he could be attacked and maybe even overwhelmed if more titans appeared while he fights the hairy giant. And yet still, the Beast Titan had not changed from it's watchful demeanor only a few dozen meters away. Instead it then turned to leave, much to James anger despite having wanted it to leave him be earlier. But the intelligence it shown plus how accurately it could throw something big had made James reprioritize this new threat as something that has to be taken care of now.
James snarled and motioned to attack, when he heard it speak aloud, "You can move now. I've seen enough, take care of him".
It left then and James went to pursue it, only for at least 2 dozen titans come out of the shadows and from behind other larger trees that were near his own. They varied in size, but quite a few were in the 15 meter class. But being 17 meters tall himself, he knew he still had an advantage on them. But there were alot to deal with at once. How hadn't he smelled or sensed them before? He then realized that he could only smell the stink of that Beast Titan around here, which covered or mingled with the smell of the mindless for some reason. And with the difference in size and numbers James put two and two together that this was an ambush. The small fry earlier were to test him, and if he succeeded then he would be left for these larger ones. That thing planned this.
His desire and need to eliminate that Titan was almost overshadowed by the anger for being tricked so easily. He wanted nothing more than to chase down and rip the hairy bastard apart, but if he did that without killing these larger mindless he could be ganged up on by both sides and killed. And if he took too much time fighting these mindless then he might lose track of his target, and other wandering titans could be drawn to the area by his presence.
In that moment, James knew he had to draw the line between the Titan and himself. Or... he could be Two as One. 'Both works'. He'd kill the mindless as quickly as be could, and pursue the ape afterwards. If he couldn't catch it he would have to hunt for it another day or another time when be was more prepared. Growling, he took a step forward and roared. He charged the nearest, and the world went red from then on.
James shook his head to clear the memories of the past from the now. He noticed that dinner was nearly over and many were just preparing to leave for the cabins, those at his table included. James didnt see that blonde hair in a bun anywhere, but he would soon enough. After all, he had something special tomorrow.
He had a fight with Annie to attend.
