Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter I wouldn't need to partake in an overpriced, monotonous education. But alas, I don't, so I do.
But you were just friends,
At least that's what you said.
Now I know better from his fingers in your hair.
Remus hated the holidays. Not the actual holidays themselves; no, no, no he loved the idea of people coming together in celebration. It was just the way they chose to celebrate that annoyed him. For example, the Gryffindors on New Year's. Gryffindors were known for their ability to party hard and long hhinto the night, even in small numbers. Like the twenty odd students who stayed over the break.
Every New Year's Eve was the same: Loud music blared from a portable radio. Soon after the boisterous dancing would begin. Someone (usually Sirius) smuggled in some butterbeer, and someone (usually Sirius) spiked said butterbeer with firewhiskey. Thus, a loud, drunken riot would erupt sometime near midnight.
As was the case on the New Year's Eve of 1976.
Remus found himself sitting in the corner with a pounding headache, as per usual. Meghan McCormack was dancing atop a table. A Hobgoblins song was being blasted from the wireless. People were drunkenly mulling about, though Remus couldn't really blame them; there had been a lot to drink over lately. He just wished they wouldn't do it four days after the full moon. This month had been particularly brutal, and there was nothing Remus would have loved more than to curl up in his big, warm bed and let the weariness seep from his body. Especially since Sirius appeared to have vanished a half hour before, most likely in search of more liquor, so he would have their dormitory to himself. But there was no chance of him getting any rest with the racket coming from downstairs.
At roughly ten minutes to midnight Remus couldn't take it anymore. The party mongers had begun to sing, or rather, screech along with the WWN, and poor Remus was sure that if he didn't vacate Gryffindor Tower immediately his head would explode. Violently.
And so he made his way around the overturned furniture, over the spilt Pumpkin Pasties that were quickly meshing with the carpet, and about the flailing students to the portrait hole, through which he exited.
"I can't say I blame you, dear," the Fat Lady called after him. He waved to her in recognition with his free hand. The other was being used to rub his temple.
As he retreated farther and farther from the common room, the less his head throbbed. Somewhere in the castle a clock chimed midnight. It might have been his imagination, but Remus thought he felt a shudder under his feet coming from the direction of the Fat Lady's portrait. Regardless, he was thankful for avoiding the commotion New Year's always ensued. The party would be in even fuller swing now, though, so Remus continued his stroll. He loved walking; it was probably his favorite thing about being a prefect. It cleared his head, no matter how exhausted he was. And the castle was always so serene at night.
The young werewolf continued his circuit of the fourth floor, his headache becoming less distinct with every step. He rounded the corner to the corridor farthest from Gryffindor Tower, and suddenly felt as though he had crashed into a brick wall.
From the way he was standing, Sirius might have been staring out the window if it hadn't been for the fact that Lily Evans was wrapped around him. From her seat on the window ledge she had encircled Sirius' waist with her legs and wound her long fingers in his hair. Sirius, for his part, didn't seem to mind; it could be ventured to say that, judging by the way he was snogging her, he wasn't the bit opposed to their position.
Oh crap.
"Oh crap!"
Sirius practically jumped off of Lily, who turned to stare wide eyed at Remus. The two looked at each other, open mouthed, then at Remus, and then back at each other. Lily stood from the window, running a hand nervously through her hair.
"I, um, I think I had better go to bed now."
Sirius took a few steps closer to her, his head tilted to the side. "Lily, don't."
"No," she laid a hand on his chest that made Remus' stomach turn. "No, it's ok. You two need to talk."
Sirius gave her a small smile and squeezed her hand. As she pulled away, he reached up and gave her ponytail a tug. Out of the corner of his eye, Remus saw her roll her own as she walked past him, even as a little grin spread across her lips. Her footsteps echoed on the stone floor until she turned the corner and they faded away.
"Lily Evans?" Remus hissed.
"Moony, before you freak out―"
"Lily Evans? What the hell are you thinking?"
"I know who she is, Moony."
"Then you should know that your best friend has been in love with her for six years!"
Sirius stared at his feet. "I know," he mumbled.
"You've got to be the worst best friend on the planet."
"I know!" his voice rang through the corridor. "I know. I didn't mean for it to happen like this."
Remus brought a hand to his face. "Let me guess; you're going to tell me it's just one of your harmless flings. That she's the only girl in school you've yet to snog. You're going to tell that as soon as James gets back you and Lily won't so much as look at each other again." Please, please let him say that.
When he removed his hand from over his eyes Sirius was staring into them. "That's not what I was going to say Moony. And you know just as well as I do that most of that was unfounded."
Remus groaned and let his hands fall to his side. "So what happens now? You and James start a war over Lily? That's not fair to Lily and it's really unfair to me. And Peter."
"We've got a plan."
A plan? "How long has this…thing been going on exactly?"
Sirius smiled sheepishly at him. "Well, technically we didn't get together until a couple days ago. But we've kind of been going back and forth with each other since Halloween."
Two months? Damn. He really was a terrible best friend. But, reflecting on it then, Remus had to admit he should have seen it coming. Those fleeting looks in the halls, the way Sirius tensed up whenever she walked into a room. Not to mention the position they'd been found in after the Death Eater attack in Hogsmeade. Sirius had kept a firm hand on the small of her back as the Aurors had escorted them back to the castle. And the way he had stared at her when she said she'd be staying over break... Man, how had he missed that?
"Moony." Remus refocused on Sirius. "Moony, I didn't mean for this to happen. It just sort of…happened, you know? It…I…You don't pick who you fall in love with."
Remus felt his jaw slack and his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. Hell had frozen over. "You're in love with her?"
Sirius sighed and ran a hand through his unruly hair. "I don't know. I don't know. She's not like anyone else I've ever met before. She's…me, but prettier and a better person. You know?"
Remus stared at him. No, he really didn't know.
"Look, I know I've been around the block a couple times when it comes to girls. Believe me, I know. No one ever forgets to remind me. But this time it's different. She gets me. I don't know what love feels like, but if I ever get a chance at finding out I'm sure it'll be with her."
Remus sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. This was tuning out to be messier than he had initially thought it would be. He needed chocolate.
"I don't like this." Sirius opened his mouth to protest, but Remus held a hand up. "I don't like this, but I understand it. Kind of. I guess. And I hope for all our sakes that this actually works out, Padfoot. What's your plan for Prongs?"
Sirius, whose face had split into a blinding grin, put his arm around his friend's shoulders and began to lead him back to the common room. By then everyone in there had either fallen into a drunken stupor or just gone ahead and passed out. "We're going to ease him into it. Once term starts back up Lily's going to be spending a lot more time with us. You're ok with that, right?"
"Of course." At this rate he'd let Professor Slughorn adopt him if it would restore reality.
"So Lily and I are kinda going to hint at the fact that we're together for a while and tell him when he starts showing signs that he might be ok with it."
"What if he doesn't figure it out?"
Sirius shrugged uncomfortably. "I guess we'll tell him when we both can suck it up enough to handle whatever his reaction will be." Merlin, but he could be so utterly naïve.
In spite of himself, Remus found himself nodding his head. "That…might actually work."
Sirius stopped walking and pulled his arm away from Remus. "You doubted my brilliance?"
"Yes," Remus laughed. "Just promise me something."
"At this rate I'd promise you my firstborn son."
"I don't think Lily would appreciate that very much." Sirius growled at him. "Seriously, though, don't wait around forever to tell James, Padfoot. I can't imagine that you and Lily will have a good time of sneaking around."
"I know," Sirius sighed. "But it's worth it." He looked Remus squarely in the eye. "Lily's worth it."
Remus shook his head. "Wow, Padfoot. It's nice to see that you're finally acting somewhat mature."
Sirius slapped him on the back. Hard.
Now you know why this chapter is so cool. I love Lupin, I really do. And I wanted to end this chapter on a happy note, because things are gonna get a little darker from now on. Or a lot darker. It depends on where we're at. I will say that some major shit is gonna go down around chapter 23.
The title is Just Friends by Gavin DeGraw.
A warning of which you should not necessarily freak out about: As my classes have officially started back up, updates may be rather sporadic after the next chapter. I'm truly very sorry; I don't like it any more than you do. I feel like I'll be letting ya'll down. But I digress.
Til next Saturday!
