This is the diary of Shesaris Finnigan.

She is the eldest daughter of Lavender (Brown) and Seamus Finnigan

Shesaris is now 21 years old, but the diary entry bellow was written when she was nearly seventeen.

She has one younger sister: Jesanna (Zanne) who is now 17 and in her last year at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

This is an entry in her diary:


Chapter 7: Shesaris' Diary

He did it the day before his birthday… The day before he was to turn seventeen… the day before his magical abilities were untied of all restrictions. He died in chains. That's how he put it. He was in chains, tied down by everyone around him.

I knew he was having a hard time… but I didn't know it had gone that far… how could I have?

I was mad when I heard about him and May Weasley. What did he think he could tell her that he couldn't tell me—his girlfriend?

I'll admit it… our relationship was rather superficial… kind of artificial… and to say we loved each other… well that'd be rather bogus.

But I cared about him. We had great fun… well before he turned sixteen anyway. Then he was like an empty shell. We still had sex… of course. But he was never fully there… you know?

He was more torn up after May and him got found at that gas station after their little run-away-attempt in December 2018. Afterwards he told me that he thought we should break-up. I asked him what was so special about May Weasley. He told me that they understood each other, that they were somehow connected. He went on about how, when they ran away, they had a little wedding ceremony thing. That he gave her the silver band his father had given him for his sixteenth. He told me that he and May were going to run away and really get married… I could tell they'd done "it". It wasn't hard to see.

Of course I told everyone that I'd dumped him… as a lack of attention thing.

But his plans didn't turn out. The Weasley girl didn't want to talk to him after that. She moved to the all girls Witching school… and as far as I'm concerned she never saw him again... well, alive anyway.

I really quite missed him though… I don't know if it was just the sex or not…

I climbed in his window on the 6th of February 2019—the night before his seventeenth birthday.

I gave him his birthday present…

He refused it at first, but I knew he'd give in… they all do…

But then it all turned pear shaped.

I woke up early the next morning (as I've trained myself to do when I stay at guy's houses for the night). I rolled over and he had his back to me.

He had gorgeous shoulders.

I wrapped my arms around him and told him I had to go. He didn't answer me so—as a joke—I covered his mouth with my hand. But he wasn't breathing through his mouth and I couldn't feel air coming out of his nose. I got up and that's when I saw all of the blood. The white sheets were scrunched up over his hands and they were soaked with it.

I couldn't think. I didn't know what to do. I chucked my clothes on and grabbed my broomstick, flying from his window and not looking back.

I discovered that his younger brother found him after me…

They held a funeral for him two weeks later…

I was there. His brother and Dad, my sister, his best friend Jared Thomas, There was no sight of his mother… but I don't even now if he even had one. May showed up half way through. She looked pretty hollow.

I couldn't help myself. Afterwards I approached her and told her that I hoped she was happy with what she'd done.

It's been a whole year now… I've moved on… but it tears me up to think of his Dad and younger brother.

Shesaris Finnigan, February 6th 2020

Rose stood from the roof's cold floor. She made her way over to Keegan and took his hand, pulling him away from the edge.

He laughed—a cold, vacant laugh.

"What? You afraid I want to jump?"

Before Rose had a chance to think, the answer had slipped out.

"Yes."

The fake smile disappeared from Keegan's face.

"And besides… If you fell over the side, then I'd be forced to actually fly a broomstick to rescue you."

Keegan smiled faintly.

"I'm sorry Keegan."

The smile dropped and he shook his hand away from Rose's grip.

"Yeah, well it's over now. It's done and it's been over four years. It's time I moved on."

He wondered slowly away. Rose had no Idea what to say to him. What do you say to someone when your cousin may be the reason his or her brother is dead?

"You know what?" He snapped suddenly, turning back to Rose. "I would really like to know WHY she did it. Why didn't she just talk to him? If she didn't want to be with him, why didn't she at least tell him why? Then maybe he'd have understood. Maybe, as fucked up as his life was, Sam would have been able to move on. Why was she so selfish?"

"I don't know Keegan… I don't know why."

He picked up his broomstick.

"Come here, I'll take you back to your window. It's late."

And he did, without so much as a goodnight.


Lily sat on the shoulders of the Salazar Slytherin statue in the courtyard.

"So you had to stay behind because?"

The lanky brunette that sat at the base of the statue sighed.

"I've told you Potter, I had to go and watch my sister do her fashion show in New York. Mum wouldn't let me miss it… Not for the star child, oh no."

Lily laughed, "Finnigan, your Mother's such a bitch."

Jesanna scolded Lily. "Yeah, but only I'm allowed to call her names."

Lily shrugged. "Fine with me."

"You've become rather dark and twisty over the holidays Potter. What happened?"

Lily shrugged, sliding down the back of the statue.

"I dunno. I guess I've just grown a back bone."

Jesanna looked intently at Lily.

"Are you sure that's it?"

"Geez Zanne, will you drop it? I just told you, I'm fine."

Jesanna shrugged, "Sorry. Merlin, I reckon maybe they got our sorting mixed up…"

Lily laughed. "Your not brave enough to be a Gryffindor."

Jesanna laughed back, "I don't think it counts if you beg the hat to let you into Gryffindor."

Lily aimed a punch at Jesanna's arm.

"Shut up alright! I was eleven; I didn't want my brothers to think they were any braver than me because they're all in Gryffindor. And anyway, I reckon the hat would have sorted me into Gryffindor even if I hadn't of asked it."

"You would have probably been put into Hufflepuff… Wait, you're not loyal enough for that. I'd say Slytherins your best bet… but I dunno if you're determined enough." Jesanna laughed.

The sound of footsteps on the stone floor reached the girls ears and Jesanna hissed: "Quick Potter, you're not allowed to be in the Slytherin Courtroom."

Lily mounted her broom and hovered above the archway.

A few seconds passed and Scorpius Malfoy entered the courtyard, his hand loosely wrapped around his wand.

Lily signalled to Jesanna to watch and she crept closer to Scorpius.

"Why are you such a loner now Finnigan? Your sister had stacks of friends." Scorpius smirked at Jesanna, not particularly in a malicious way, sauntering over towards her.

"That's because she slept with just about every guy in Slytherin." She grinned.

Lily crept closer behind Scorpius.

"Hmmm, no. She must have missed the first and second years. I didn't recieve an invite."

Jesanna and Scorpius laughed together and Lily hovered closer to Scorpius.

Jesanna stifled a laugh and Lily put her finger up to her lips, shushing her.

She hovered as close as she could get to Scorpius without touching him and she blew gently on his neck.

His movement was so sharp that the smile didn't even have a chance to fade from Lily's face before she was swung in the face and thrown from her broom.

"Geez Scorpius! I was just having a bit of fun!"

He stood, staring taken aback at Lily, tangled with her broom on the stone floor.

"He's mental don't you think Finnigan?" Jesanna stood, concealed by Scorpius.

Lily untangled her broom and rubbed her elbow.

"Zanne?" Scorpius turned around to face Jesanna.

Lily stood and then she saw it. Scorpius' wand was wedged in Zanne's stomach, having been jabbed through a gap in her blouse.

"Oh shit!" Lily gasped and she and Scorpius caught Zanne before she face-planted the stone floor of the courtyard.

Oooh! If you ever want to find out what happens to Zanne, you better review!!

Sarah xx