"You're lucky. Whenever I've dealt with having to heal magical damage before, it's been a bitch to sort out." I'm healing the burnt flesh, watching the way it peels off her arm almost like kebab meat off a skewer.

And yet, still not enough of a gross mental image to stop me from eating kebabs.

"Yeah, lucky," the girl says with a roll of her eyes. Lanky, blonde and with arms toned from years of 'training' endured, I already feel like I know Artemis better than I should. To her I'm just the healer, brought in to fix some ouchies every so often.

To me she's the baby sister of one of my best friends.

"Just be thankful it wasn't anything Klarion did to you," I say. "Whatever that thing is, it's not something that leaves damage I can heal."

"Oh," Artemis whispers. She falls quiet after that, watching my work. I'm honestly surprised the Team took on anyone else, though it makes sense, given that Speedy threw his toys out of the pram and stomped away.

"So being upfront," I say. I slide my glasses over my eyes so I can look at her. "What do you know about me?"

She stares at me as if I've asked something like what colour the sky is. Which, to be fair, I didn't know firsthand until I got these glasses several months ago.

"Everyone in Gotham knows about you," she says. "That's like asking if someone knows about the Joker. Except less clown-like and more heroic."

I manage to smile. The new skin grows over her arm easily, despite the fact that I'm not eating as I go for once. It's making me extremely hungry though. I could murder a steak.

"I guess of all the ways to be compared to him, infamy is probably the least offensive."

"Unless you're one of the nutjobs that worships him," she mutters. "I know you're neutral, that you help everyone." She tilts her head as she squints at me. "You tried healing my mom once, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I say, sighing. "If I'd been around when it happened, I'd have been able to do something. As it was, I couldn't do much." I shrug. "Anyway, brings me to the point I was trying to make. I'm friends with your sister."

She tenses, but doesn't go to attack me. It's already going better than I thought it would.

"I… she… I mean…"

"Secret's safe," I say. Done healing, I let go of her arm and drop my hands into my lap. She sits up on the standard doctor's office chair-slash-bed thing and runs her fingers over the new skin. Her first time being healed like this, so the novelty of watching your body repair itself before your eyes is still a fresh thing for her. "Like you said, neutral. I did promise Jade I'd keep an eye on you if you ever came into my radar."

Apparently that's the wrong thing to say. "I don't want your help just as favour to my family." She leaps to her feet and starts to storm past me.

I stand and point to the seat I've just vacated. "Sit."

She scowls at me. Raises her chin defiantly.

"Sit," I repeat, more forcefully this time. She sighs and drops into the seat with all the world-weary attitude a teenager can muster.

"Jade's a friend, but that doesn't mean I'm bound to do exactly what she wants," I say. "Right now I'm here helping to heal a hero and honestly, you really think your tantrum would be anything compared to some of the bitchfits I've had to deal with? Girl, try dealing with the fallout of telling people you can't abort their affair baby."

Her eyes widen. "People have actually asked you that?"

"Oh yeah," I say with a sigh. "Literally everything you can imagine going to the doctor for, as well as everything you'd be too embarrassed to get seen. I tried having an open day once near Gotham University. That left me with some nightmares that made me glad I don't sleep."

She leans forwards. "So what's the weirdest thing you've ever had to deal with?"

Flashes of victims of the Joker, Killer Croc and even Zsasz flicker through my mind.

"Frat boy parties," I answer. "I don't know what it is with those boys and their obsession with putting things up their asses, but I'll never look at a dog whistle the same way again."

"I'm… honestly kinda regretting asking."

"Oh don't be. Your sister convinced me to pretend I couldn't heal him. Then she dared me to give him bad gas."

She gasps. "You didn't!"

"I did," I admit, laughing. "We left him handcuffed to a street light outside a house with about twelve poodles. It was brilliant."

It's only when she stops chuckling that her nose scrunches. "That seems kinda out of order though, if all he did was… well be a bit weird with a whistle."

"Well I think Jade asked him out in school and he said no, so…"

"Oh god," Artemis says, burying her face in her hands. "She doesn't do forgiveness well."

"Nope," I say. "I also got given a burmese python as a thank you for healing someone. It's name is Fluffy."

"Next you'll be telling me that you have a rabbit called Killer."

I laugh. "No, but I like that idea! I was thinking of getting a komodo dragon and calling it Jub-Jub, so they can all be the best of friends."

"Well, it's good to know that everyone with superpowers is crazy." She's smiling as she says it.

"Oh trust me, my sanity left a long time ago." As the conversation dips, I get the feeling that she's hiding something. It's not based on her biology, nor is it something bad. It's more like… a familiar sensation. One of not belonging. "Hey, I've got an idea," I say, "feel like playing hookie?"

She just stares at me. "Am I going to wake up in Biyalia in nothing but my underwear?"

"Oh please, I'd leave you in the south pole to be eaten by polar bears."

"You realise polar bears live on the north pole, right?"

I laugh. "And that's what would make you being eaten by them all the better!" I spin and grab the door, being sure to gesture for her to follow me. "Now come on, I have an idea." I glance out of the doorway and sure enough, perfectly on time as ever is Kaldur, waiting his turn to be healed.

He smiles as he sees me and offers Artemis a quick nod as she emerges from the medical bay.

"Artemis. I am glad to see you are well after our encounter with Klarion."

"Well, at least I can cross 'fought a lord of chaos' off my bucket list, so hey, it's all good."

Kaldur, predictably, is lost by the sarcasm. Whilst he's searching for a reply, I grab his shoulders and spin him around.

"Come on Kaldur," I say, frogmarching him. "Artemis and I are hungry and as the team leader, I'm electing you to buy us all lunch."

He looks over his shoulder at me as he says, "I do not think that we should-"

"Oh, shush with your protocols and procedures. You owe me anyway, so you're buying food."

"Fine," he says with a sigh. "You can let me walk on my own. I will not attempt escape."

"Because you know better," I say, practically singing.

He walks ahead of us, shaking his head. Artemis falls into line with me, glancing curiously up at me. "Just what does he owe you for?"

"He wouldn't let me steal the batmobile."

She looks like she doesn't know what to say to that.

-x-x-x-

The fact that we're not in Gotham means that people aren't quite used to me and my eating habits.

So the fact that I've just consumed a meal that's supposed to feed a family of five is enough to warrant lots of staring and whispered comments.

"Now I see why you've won every eating challenge there is in Gotham," Artemis says. She twirls her noodles around her chopsticks, showing off like the pro that she is. My attempts of eating with them usually don't end well.

Still do a better job than Kaldur, who it seems is wearing the majority of his food.

"Healing uses a lot of energy," I say, patting my stomach. It's bad that I could still eat more. Can't really let Kaldur pay for all of this, even if I did tell him otherwise. I earn his yearly paycheck in a day, sometimes. "More if I'm not familiar with the body type. I can heal animals too, but if it's something strange like an emu then it's going to make me hungry enough to eat the damn thing after."

"This is why I believe a trip to Atlantis would be a bad idea," Kaldur says. He has a noodle hanging from his chin. I try my best not to laugh. I fail.

"Uh, Kaldur," Artemis says, pointing to it. I shoot her a betrayed look. He looked like an Egyptian king, just with a noodle for a beard, rather than the clip-on jewelled monstrosity they have in museums. "Do you… uh, do you want me to teach you how to use them?"

Kaldur, having given up in his battle with chopsticks, and instead just picking up dumplings and throwing them into his mouth whole, sighs as he nods. "That would be most kind of you, Artemis."

"No changing the subject," I say over them. I lean over the table, grabbing the pot of green tea and smile at the way the white tablecloth is stained with all manner of food around Kaldur. Even the children a couple of tables away from us haven't made that much of a mess, and their idiot parents decided to give them Sharpies to colour with.

"I want to go to Atlantis," I say. "Just think of how amazing it would be! You're all human, but not! The basis of human biology, magically merged with others!" I gasp as I finish pouring and set the teapot down. "You have squid people, don't you? Ohmygod are there eel-people? Peopeel!" I cackle at my own joke.

Kaldur shakes his head as he sighs again. "And this is the other obvious reason why it would be a bad idea."

"You're mean," I say, grinning. "You're just worried I'll embarrass you in front of the big fish." I laugh. "See what I did there?"

Artemis, for her part, just groans like I've made a joke that belongs in a Christmas cracker. She smiles as I pour tea for her and I'm able to feel her watching as I finish and move onto filling Kaldur's mug. "So, how long have you two been dating?"

Kaldur chokes on a prawn. Instead of offering to help, I'm consumed by the wonder if it counts as offensive behaviour to eat certain seafoods in Atlantis. Can you eat a buffet of prawns if your neighbour has a shrimp-face? What if they have an octopus head? Can you still have calamari?

"We are not romantically entwined," Kaldur says, breathing deeply as he recovers.

"Oh," Artemis' eyes are wide. "I didn't mean anything by it, I just, well…"

"Kaldur's a dork and fun to annoy, but not interested," I say with a smile. "In fact, until I met Catwoman I was a shrinking violet and had no idea about how to flirt. Which makes it sound like she did something other than teach me how to use it to manipulate people, but that's all she did." I shake my head. "In terms of my love life, that sums it up best; Not Interested."

Artemis looks more confused than she did before.

"Some people like men, some people like women, some people like both," I say. "I just happen to not like anyone." Shrugging, I steal one of Kaldur's dumplings and grin as I eat it. "With my abilities I can see how everyone's biology works. From the skin all the way down to the nerves and hormones. From what I understand, normal people see the outer package and feel attracted to that. Well, I'm able to tell exactly what people's bodily urges are at all times. It's… well, nauseating. It's bad enough when I know those biological impulses are directed at me, but to have someone in me and being able to feel all that?"

The thought of it actually makes me lose my appetite. I move my plate away from myself with a slow exhale and try to ignore the bile that's rising in my throat.

"And as I had to explain to Catwoman," I say slowly, closing my eyes and pretending that I can't feel my stomach threatening to force my food back up, "I have no desire about anything. No urge whatsoever. Freaked her out more when I told her I don't masturbate because I'm just not interested."

Kaldur's eyes widen. His ears turn interesting shades as he glances around to try and see if anyone overheard. "Natasha, I do not believe this is an appropriate topic."

"Why not? It's natural and most people in this room have done so at some point. In fact, why do you think I specifically requested us not to be served by that first waiter? He had not washed his hands properly."

Kaldur looks like he's going to die of shame. Artemis just seems equal parts horrified and intrigued.

"You… see all of that?" she asks.

"Everything and more. It's why anyone who comes to me knows that I'm going to know about their identity."

"You know," Artemis says, "between the chaos earlier today and whatever weird you've got going on, I'm starting to think that maybe being normal isn't that bad."

"Artemis," Kaldur says with a clearing of his throat, "I hardly think that you are anything that could be classed as normal."

"She means unpowered, doofus," I say, smiling. "You've got magic and whatever else going on, I've got my own bullshit-tier healing and she's got a bow and arrow. No offence."

"None taken," she says with a snort. "I thought before that maybe getting powers would be cool. Never stopped to think of the downsides to them."

"And now?" I ask.

"Now I'm certain in that whatever I do, I want to do it with my own skills." She looks down at her hands. Scars from snapped bowstrings and whatever 'training' her parents made her endure dot her fingers and her palms. "I started doing this because I wanted to go against my family's legacy. Now… now I want to do this not only for me, but for everyone else that I can help. People look up to Batman because he's still just human, even if he doesn't sometimes seem it. That's what I want to become."

"And this," I say, leaning towards Kaldur, "is why you need to do a better job managing your team. Because so far all that's happened is you've all excluded her. Carry that on and you'll end up losing her."

"I, wait," Artemis nearly knocks her bowl flying as she drops her hands back to the table, "I didn't, I mean, where did you-"

"It's obvious," I say, "well, to me at least. Every member of the team is so wrapped up in their own insecurities and problems that they're not looking at the big picture. Even you," I say, flicking Kaldur's shoulder. "You're so busy worrying that you're not a good leader that you're becoming a bad one because of your constant fretting and indecision. Teams work well together only when they're experienced in working with each other." I point my chopsticks at him. "Stop thinking everything has to be your problem and ask your team for advice and opinions. Listen to them, and pull them in line when they're being assholes.

"And you," I say, pointing my chopsticks at Artemis now, "need to learn that it isn't weakness to let someone know how you feel. Kay-Eff runs his mouth a lot, believe me, I know. Unless you actually let him know he's getting under your skin, he'll keep on. He doesn't like change and he doesn't understand that people may not see things the way he does. If he or anyone else gets to you with their comments about how you're not Speedy, tell them. Tell this doofus here," I say, gesturing to Kaldur.

"And stop worrying so much about your family life," I say, more softly. "Your team leader and Robin already know, and they're still happy to have you."

Her mouth drops open. She looks to Kaldur in horror. "You… you know?"

"Of course," he says with a nod. "However, you are not your family. Before you even joined us you assisted our endeavours and even saved our lives. We are not our families, and we are not our mentors. We are our own people and we should be judged because of our own actions."

"Exactly," I say. I take a sip of my green tea and try to ignore the bottomless pit that is my stomach. Apparently I used up more energy than I thought with all that healing. Fucking magic. Don't know how or why, but it's always a bitch to heal. "Speaking of judging people by their own actions," I turn to Kaldur and smirk. I can tell by the dawning terror in his eyes that he has a good idea about what I'm going to ask, "did you ever talk to that girl you said you had feelings for?"

Artemis leans forward on her elbows. She chuckles as Kaldur's mouth opens and shuts like a fish. "I… I have been far too busy to think of such a thing," Kaldur says.

"Poor excuse," Artemis says, rolling her eyes. "You like someone, you should tell them. Especially if she's back home. If you left without letting her know how you feel, she'll just assume that you aren't thinking of her and probably just move on."

"She would not…" Kaldur seems to lose his confidence in that moment. He bites his bottom lip as he looks to me. "What do you think?"

"I think I want pudding," I say. "Otherwise, I don't know. Don't understand how romantic minds work, so if Artemis says you're doing it wrong, my money is on her being right." I pat him on the shoulder. "And this is why you need her around. Megan doesn't think like a normal teenage girl, the others are all boys, so you need some intelligence."

Artemis smiles. "Thank you."

"But until you find that intelligence, you'll just have to settle for her."

She snorts. "Okay, ouch."

"Couldn't resist," I say, smirking. "Now you can bore him all about it whilst I go to the toilet."

I slip out of my seat and walk towards the bathrooms. Turning my head, I see that they're already enraptured in conversation. Kaldur is listening intently - I wouldn't be surprised if he starts taking notes. Artemis, meanwhile, looks like she's happy she's finally being taken notice of.

"My work here is done," I announce to myself. I sneak away as they're distracted, paying our bill and leaving a nice tip for all the poor souls having to work at this late hour.

Three hours later, when I'm back home and nestled underneath a castle of blankets with a cheese board and crap tv to keep myself entertained, I finally get a phone call asking where I am and if I fell into the toilet.

I text Jade to let her know just how long it took them to notice I'd gone.

Her reply is instantaneous and filled with expletives and promises of pain.