Disclaimer: I do not own Gone With the Wind in any shape or form, nor do I make any monetary gain from this story!
A/N: Hello all, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and thank you so much for being so patient with me. Your reviews are what got me through this inspiration-less time!
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all of you!
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It had been raining for three days. Charleston had experienced a sudden downpour of freezing rain, loud thunder and frightening lightning. The windows had frosted over and the streets were icy. All in all, it seemed as if God had placed Charleston under house arrest. The sky was a sickly purple color when lightening struck, but otherwise shifted between depressing hues of gray. The clouds were low, and rain constantly fell to the ground, splattering everything with frost. After almost every thunderclap in the night, Ella would begin to cry with fright and would need someone to usher her back to sleep.
As a result, Scarlett was tired, irritable, and in no mood to be trifled with. She walked around the house like a ghost of her former self. Emotions would rarely cross her face, and none of Rhett's taunts provoked a slight reaction. Dark shadows remained under her eyes, and her face was constantly pale and pinched. Ella's cries kept her up, and she received little to no sleep.
Rhett had been nice to the children, but it was Scarlett who kept them entertained throughout the day. It was Scarlett who drank awful tea with Ella, played pirates with Beau, and read to Wade. It was Scarlett who bathed and dressed the children every night, making sure they ate enough at dinner.
She trudged up the stairs, yawning widely. Her skirts in her hands, she almost stumbled on the top stair and clutched at the railing for a moment. Only one moment, she wished for, just one moment of piece so I can rest.
"Oh Scarlett, dear?" Eleanor's voice called. Scarlett nearly cried. What could she possibly want from me?
Eleanor Butler was a kind woman, but she pried into Scarlett's life more than Scarlett cared for. As Eleanor had never met her daughter-in-law, she naturally had many questions. And a lot of them revolved around her children, unfortunately. Scarlett had been forced to tell the story of her two previous marriages, and the intricacies of Beau's guardianship many-a-time in Charleston.
"Yes, Mrs. Butler?" Scarlett's voice shook with the effort it took to be pleasant. Oh I just want to sleep for an hour, she whined inwardly, where has Rhett been these past weeks?
"Would you come in here," Eleanor asked politely, "I'd love to catch up with you for a few moments."
"Catch up?" She muttered to herself, "We live in the same house!" Exasperated she continued to talk to herself, "What could there possibly be to catch up on?"
But still, she forced a smile as she rounded the corner into the upstairs parlor. "Of course, Mrs. Butler, I'd simply love to talk with you!"
"Lovely, dear," the woman smiled as she rose up to kiss her daughter-in-law, "I'll ring for tea."
Scarlett dutifully embraced Rhett's mother before sitting down opposite her. Her eyes wandered about the room, lingering on the draperies, the soaked window, and finally the large balcony that was inaccessible because of the rain. When the tea arrived, Scarlett sipped gratefully at hers, glad to be absent of the conversation.
"Scarlett," Mrs. Butler began, "I was wondering," Scarlett raised her cup to her mouth, eager for another sip, "if you'd thought about more children."
The audacity of the question made Scarlett choke on her tea, spitting the liquid back into the cup. Spluttering, she set the saucer down with trembling hands.
"Oh, forgive me!" Mrs. Butler trembled, "that was awfully rude!"
"No," Scarlett gasped, wiping her mouth delicately, "no, no it's fine." She took a deep breath and continued. "I do have three children already, ma'am."
"Yes," Mrs. Butler said easily, "but none of them are Rhett's are they?"
Scarlett felt her smile and pleasant demeanor fade away. Her eyes squared. "You forget Bonnie." Sadness crept into her tone, "and the baby I lost, Mrs. Butler. We would have had two children by now."
Eleanor softened, "I don't forget them, dear. I am only asking because I think that a baby would help bring you and Rhett closer. I know that losing a child is a terrible thing. I know that it has made you and my son drift from each other, Scarlett."
Scarlett smiled in understanding. So she thinks that a baby would solve everything? "I understand your concern, Mrs. Butler. But I don't want to tie Rhett down. He needs to roam, I know you understand, and a baby right now…" She smiled wistfully. "I'd love to give Rhett ten babies, but I don't think that's what he needs at the moment."
Eleanor set her saucer down too. "Oh Scarlett," she cried, reaching for her hand, "you would give up the chance for a darling little baby so that Rhett could be happy?"
Scarlett looked Eleanor square in the eye. "All I want," she said quietly, "is for Rhett to be happy."
---
When Scarlett left the upstairs parlor, she headed not for the nursery, as she normally would have, but instead, for her bedroom. The conversation with Rhett's mother had drained her of any remaining strength.
"Prissy," she called, "mind the children, I simply must take a nap."
The girl nodded and rushed to obey her mistress. When Miss Scarlett took that tone, it was best to leave her to her own devices, she knew!
"A baby," she murmured, shedding her gown for a wrapper. "Lord knows I'd give him a hundred babies if it would make him love me again."
She walked to her vanity, and eased herself down. Gazing at herself, she almost shuddered. "Well," she laughed, "no wonder Rhett's been avoiding you! You look like a monster! It's a miracle Ella hasn't screamed when I walked in her door at night…"
She unclipped her earrings, and removed all of her hairpins. Her dark curls fell to her shoulders, and she gratefully massaged her scalp where the pins had been tightly fastened. Rubbing her eyes, she looked more closely. "Hideous," she sighed before rising.
As she pulled down the heavy duvet, she heard the rain begin to fall harder, a sure sign that it wouldn't be letting up anytime soon. I've got to get out of this house, or I'll simply go mad! If Eleanor comes to be one more time about babies, I might kill her. Doesn't she know how much I want a child?
"God's nightgown," she mumbled fiercely into her pillow. "I'd hoped that night, when I was sick in Savannah that it was because I was pregnant." She sniffled and fought back tears. "But that next week, I bled anyway…"
I am pathetic, she told herself, and I need sleep. Scarlett O'Hara does not cry because she receives her monthly, right on time. Scarlett O'Hara does not cry at all!
"Still," she murmured sleepily, "it was disappointing."
---
Rhett exited the study earlier than he had suspected. Finally, he had finished his work and was free to entertain his family! At last he could play with the children, or perhaps, he grinned, with his wife. But first, he thought, I'd like to change into something more comfortable.
He opened the door quietly, not wanting to alert the children he was free to play with quite yet. They would probably swarm him, they were bored with being cooped up inside for so long. Turning, Rhett shut the door behind him just as silently as it had opened.
"Funny," he said, "I didn't think it would be quite so dark in here." The drapes had been pulled tight and lamps had been dimmed.
At his words, the bed rustled. No, no, that wasn't right. The bed sheets rustled, or rather the woman in the bed sheets made them rustle.
Rhett nodded to himself in understanding. Scarlett was asleep. Why isn't she playing with the children though? He asked himself. She really can't be that apathetic to their boredom. He walked closer to the bed, about to wake her. Really, she should be with Ella, Ella was terrified of storms.
But upon reaching the bed, he stopped. She had turned to face him, a sparse sheet covering her form.
"When did you get so thin, Scarlett?" He questioned softly, "Why have I not noticed that?" Thin isn't quite the word, he thought, she looks brittle.
He looked at her dark hair, splayed across the pillow in gleaming curls. "You gave Bonnie those curls," he sighed as he stroked the air over one spiral, "those beautiful curls."
Her eyes were closed, but the dark shadows beneath were still visible. Had she not been sleeping? Evidently, she had not. He had heard her getting up in the night, but she soon returned, and he merely assumed she was restless. She looks pale too, his mind supplied. Rhett looked down at her small form, which managed to take up the entirety of the bed. All of her slight limbs were splayed about and he chuckled in spite of himself.
He looked to the door and back down at his wife. "Rest darling," he whispered, "I'll look after the children."
Rhett changed as quickly as possible before exiting the room with a last glance. God, she was beautiful. He had not even made it halfway to the nursery when Ella's little form came flying at him.
"Uncle Rhett," she shrieked happily, "oh, won't you take tea with me?"
He looked down at the little girl with her mother's eyes and smiled. "Why Miss Ella, I would be delighted!"
---
"Mother," Scarlett heard right beside her ear. "Mother," she felt someone shaking her, "it's time to wake up!"
Scarlett groaned and turned over. Giggles met her response and the child on the bed shook her again.
"Mother," Ella whined, "wake up!"
"Alright Ella," Scarlett barked, sitting up, "I'm up!"
Ella couldn't remember the last time her mother had spoken so harshly to her! Oh no, she almost cried, Mother's mad at me!
"I'm sorry Mother!" Ella said, about to break into tears, "I'm sorry!" Scarlett peered at the girl in her lap. The seven-year old was sniffling furiously and rubbing her eyes, tell-tale signs that Scarlett was in for the waterworks.
"Oh, Ella," she sighed, "I'm not mad, darling. Just a little bit cranky because I've only just been woken up."
Instantly, a smile was back on the girl's face. "Really, Mother?" Ella bounced with excitement. "Good, because we're going to be late for supper if you don't change!"
Scarlett resisted the urge to fall back asleep, as strong as it was. It seemed as if she had just closed her eyes a moment ago! And yet she had slept for five hours! Ella's hand tugged her to her feet and she yawned, stretching.
"Alright, Ella," she said, trying to be cheerful, "pick out what Mother is going to wear to dinner, please."
Ella nearly levitated she looked so excited, instantly rushing to the wardrobe. Moments later she returned, holding a rich eggplant colored frock. Scarlett shook her head, and Ella looked very disappointed. The little girl hung her head, and Scarlett sighed, walking over to the wardrobe.
"No, this one is for something more formal, darling, choose one of these." Scarlett pointed at the supper dresses, a selection of four frocks.
"How about this one," her daughter questioned eagerly, "is this good?"
Scarlett nodded in approval. "Yes, Ella, you did a mighty fine job, why, this is one of my favorites!" She bent and kissed her daughter's nose, and smoothed her hair. "Now shoo, sweetheart, and let your Mother get ready!" Ella nodded and hustled away.
Sighing, Scarlett closed the door behind her daughter. I'm so sleepy, she yawned again, I better not drink anything tonight, or I'll be asleep in the second course!
---
After dinner, Scarlett had excused herself and the children from the table. It was time for baths and bedtime, she said unnecessarily, and I must change beforehand. They had waved her off, and Rhett had dutifully kissed her cheek. He didn't notice her soft smile or lingering eyes as he returned to the table. But Eleanor did, and she was going to say something to her son that night!
When they had retired to the downstairs parlor, Rhett had poured himself some brandy, refilling his mother's wine glass at the same time.
"Rhett," his mother called as he poured the drinks, "when are you going to give me another grandchild?"
"Pardon," he managed, hastily he set the decanter down. He had sloshed it at her abrupt question and quickly wiped the mess away.
"You know," she said amusedly, "Scarlett spit out her tea when I asked her that."
He turned white, "You asked Scarlett about another baby?"
"Yes, dear," his mother turned to him, "is there a problem?"
Rhett sat down heavily, handing Eleanor her wine. He decided to be bluntly honest with his mother. "Scarlett would never want another child."
Eleanor looked shocked, putting a hand over her heart, "Rhett!"
He put up a hand for her silence. "She didn't want any of her children when she found out she was pregnant. I wouldn't want to tie her down with another one." Rhett's dark eyes glistened in the firelight. Another baby? I doubt Scarlett would even let me kiss her cheek again if I said something about another baby.
"Why, Rhett," Eleanor cried, "that's not true. All women love babies!"
"Not Scarlett," Rhett chuckled harshly, "not Scarlett."
"No," his mother insisted on pressing, "you don't know your wife very well then, Rhett."
"Believe me," he gave her a half-smile, "I know her better than I wish to at times, Mother."
"Rhett, oh do be quiet for a moment," Rhett looked shocked; his mother was always so soft-spoken! Of course, she meddled and gossiped, but she was never so brash! "Scarlett told me that she would happily give you another baby, but that she didn't think you'd want to be tied down to her!" Eleanor looked quite worked up, "That's the answer you gave me! It seems neither of you believe the other one even wants to be near them!"
Rhett didn't say anything; he could only nurse his brandy in silence. Another baby? She would give me another baby, and happily?
"You must be mistaken, Mother," he managed. "Scarlett, she—"
But Eleanor cut him off, "Rhett, I have never seen a woman so in love with a man as Scarlett is with you. She told me that she would give you ten babies, but that she didn't think you would want one."
Ten sounds magnificent, he inwardly smiled, ten little babies with her smile and my eyes. Or maybe, her eyes and my hair, or maybe, her curls and my smile!
"Rhett," his mother cried impatiently, "oh, stop being impossible and listen! You've got to make things right with her!"
"Mother," he stood, "I appreciate this, but I beg you, please don't try to interfere, Scarlett and I can handle our marriage."
"Fine," she softened before scowling playfully. "But don't think that I won't keep pestering you for a grandbaby, Rhett!"
"I wouldn't dream of it," he replied dryly before kissing her cheek goodnight. "If you would excuse me, I'm going to go help Scarlett with the children."
---
Scarlett smiled as she toweled off Ella and sent her into Prissy's arms. The girl was capable enough, she supposed, when it came to keeping Ella rather happy. But Wade and Beau were out of her hands, when the two were together, as they always were, they rambunctious and disobedient. Yet for Scarlett, they could be docile and obedient.
"Alright Wade, Beau, get in the bath please! The water will get too cold if you do not hurry!"
Both boys eagerly leapt in, almost soaking Scarlett completely. She laughed, wiping a sodden curl from her face and quickly pinned it back. She splashed the back merrily; glad she had changed into a cotton dress and apron from years ago.
"Boys," she said between giggles, "let me wash your faces and then you can play again!"
They laughed as they evaded her attempts with the washcloth. She leaned over further, looking menacing as she came at Wade with the soap.
"Wade Hampton," she mockingly took a stern tone, "let me wash your face right now or you can forget about that bedtime story!" He quickly complied and she moved onto Beau. "You too mister," she wagged a finger in his direction, "don't think you can get out of this!"
As she continued to play with her sons, Rhett watched from the doorway. There was no one watching, he observed, she didn't have to be the loving mother, and yet, she was. Has she really changed that much? He nodded to himself. She has.
Stepping away from the door, he made his way to Ella's room. Bidding the servant-girl goodnight, he ushered Prissy to help Scarlett towel off the boys. Ella giggled as tried to comb her hair into a plait, and laughed outright when he looked at her with furrowed brows.
"Mother has to do it," she informed him, "she does it the best."
"Ella," Scarlett said from the doorway, "why aren't you in your nightgown yet – Oh!" She put a hand over her heart, "you startled me, Rhett!"
He grinned, "My apologies, darling, I'll go see to the boys." With a rogue grin, he left Scarlett puzzled and breathless against the door.
"Mother," Ella's voice snapped her into action, "would you help me?" Her voice was muffled and Scarlett looked over before snorting with laughter. Ella had confused the sleeve with the head-hole.
---
"Are the children asleep?" he asked as she undressed for the night.
She sighed a moment before smiling tiredly at him, "Yes, at last." For a moment, she struggled with the buttons of her dress, grunting with frustration. Finally, she turned to him, and he quickly stifled his amusement. "Rhett, would you help me with this?"
He was at her side in a moment, his fingers in the button immediately. Rhett stood directly behind her, his hand intimately on her waist. His breath was hot in her ear as he answered, "My pleasure." He drew out the word, his lips barely brushing her ear. She shuddered lightly, her head resting on his shoulder.
When he finished, he delicately turned her to face him. Her chest heaved in the confinement of the corset, her eyes were hooded and she stared directly at his mouth.
"Thank you, Rhett," she said throatily, and continued to undress.
Rhett swallowed hard and moved further away, his eyes never leaving hers. Temptress, his mind accused her. He watched intently as her dress fell to her feet and she stepped out of it. Her pantalets were obstacles to his eyes, and he almost cursed them aloud. As she slipped into her nightclothes, she eyed her husband. He slowly undressed, letting his slacks fall, his shirt trailing almost immediately. He stood in only his shorts before her, and she gasped quietly. Seducer, she wanted to cry out. But he only slipped in the covers beside her.
As the gas lamps dimmed, both lay there in silence, a prison to their desires.
"Goodnight," she whispered, "have a good sleep."
He was silent for a moment, before he huskily replied, "Don't I get a kiss, Scarlett?" The question was innocent enough, but her reply was not.
As she turned over to face him, something aggressive rose within her. "Oh," she whispered wickedly, "you get more than that."
His lips crashed onto hers, and she met his kiss eagerly. He rolled so that he was atop her, balanced on his forearms. He nuzzled her neck, kissing at her collarbones before looking down on her hungrily.
"I was hoping you would say that," he said slowly, and quickly descended upon her waiting form again.
---
Rhett eyed his wife's sated and sleeping form with intrigue. Never before had she quite responded like that, with passion, fire, and dare he say it, love. She snuggled closer to him, and he cautiously wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
In the throes of their passion, she had cried it over and over again, I love you Rhett, she had almost screamed, I love you, I love you, I love you, Oh God, I love you. He had said nothing, but drawn her in for a kiss, moving intently within her. He had wanted to respond in turn, oh God; he had wanted so badly to tell her he loved her in return! But how could he? How could he relinquish his heart to her? After their past, after her love for Ashley, how could he do that?
I want to try again, he wanted to tell her, but I don't want you to hurt me. I don't want to have to leave you again, but God help me, I will if it returns to the way it was. She's already tried to change, he acknowledged, I need to try too.
"Don't make me leave you," he whispered to her sleeping form, "just love me, Scarlett and we can be happy." He kissed her forehead gently, "I want us to be happy."
He could not say it just yet though, so he fell asleep, wishing he could tell his wife how much he loved her. But he could not say it, and she would have to wait for him, as he waited for her.
---
I'm so sorry about the five month wait between the chapters, but I hope this one is worth it! I decided to take the story in a less angst way, and I am now writing from scratch, as opposed to before, where the chapters were already written.
I love reviews, so maybe a couple would be nice…
