I watched them intently. Their backs to me, either ignoring and dismissing the glare I was delivering or they were simply oblivious as they poked through the untouched bedroom. I wasn't too fond of letting strangers in here, again. I wanted this to be done and over with, so I could be left in peace. But with the lack of information and progress in the case, peace wouldn't find me anytime soon. I would be forced to sit and endure the same old questions, watch as possible suspects were interrogated, only to groan as he had been proven innocent.
These guys seemed different, though. Sure, they checked the same spots the other detectives did, but they also analyzed her exposed jewelry and notebooks that had been neatly placed side by side, color coordinated Just how she liked them. They shined a light under her bed, pushed her clothes aside in the closet to see a barren wall and looked behind the hung up mirrors. Prior detectives had done the typical sort of thing, but never what these guys were doing. They were looking for something well hidden. Some sort of secret. Not just some information that could guide them closer to who killed her, but a clue none the less.
They would often share looks with one another, almost speaking telepathically and it drove me mad. I tried to ignore it, to let it go, but eventually I had to speak up.
"Not finding what you were looking for, I take it?"
Straightening their spines, they turned to me, shaking their heads.
"You wanna tell me what exactly you were looking for?"
The taller one; Hamill took slow steps forward, meeting me in the doorway, his hands fumbling with one another as he struggled to speak. "There's been..some possible new evidence." "Possible? There either is or there isn't-" "Not necessarily," Ford spoke up, his eyes still scanning the room.
I raised a brow at him. "Oh?"
He finally turned to face me, his jaw tense, stern, though eyes wide awake and seeming genuinely interested, to say the least. "Was Tyler interested in dark magic? Witchcraft? Anything of the sorts?" "No! No, of course not! She wasn't raised that way." "You're sure?" He questioned with a raised brow, which I took to offense. "Yes, I'm sure," I snapped back with a glare. "I didn't grow up with and then raise her or anything." "So you haven't found any weird symbols or anything?" "No, never. I've cleaned this room top to bottom and I haven't found anything I would question. You wanna tell me what this is about?"
Again, they shared one of their special looks. "You know, I'm getting real sick of that shit."
With wide eyes, they turned to me. Blinking in confusion over my sudden outburst. "Sick of wh-" "The unheard conversations. The secrets you two are hiding and if it has something to do with my sister, I have a right to know. What's going on?"
With a well-practiced gulp, Hamill replied lowly, "We went to the crime scene today and..discovered something the other detectives have overlooked-a pentagram." When he noted my furrowed brow and slowly parting lips, he had rushed out his final statement, worried I was completely clueless on the subject. "In Christianity, the pentagram-" "Is used for protection," I finished, causing his face to light up slightly, but then falter. "Y-yeah, but.. What we found was no protective symbol. Evalyn, we-we think Tyler was used as a sacrifice in a ritual."
With a sharp intake of breath, I had cursed and rubbed a palm over my face, wiping the memory of that day away.
In that moment, the moment when they revealed something I should have known from the very beginning, I felt haunted by the blackest of clouds. Not one that carried bad luck or sadness, but instead one that held an ungodly anger that I was struggling to contain. It ate at my insides, boiled in my veins and brought upon multiple dizzy spells that forced me to take a seat with a bouncing knee when I got a little bit too worked up. Once I had finished my hasty pacing, fingers tangled in my hair and teeth clenched so tight I had expected to hear a crunch, I had thrown myself into the driver's seat of my car and reunited with Leah at a place I knew I shouldn't have been in, but something in me had snapped.
There were no new leads after all of this time, besides the one that manage to make me vomit. Not one god damn arrest and I was sure as hell I could do a better job than them. I was going to take matters into my own hands. For her.
After having explained the situation to Leah, her and I met five days a week at her shop, practicing with various guns until I could be trusted not to blow my own foot off. When she felt I was ready, she had practically handed over my choice weapon on a golden plate, costing me little to nothing. "I'd just give it to you for free," she mumbled. "If dad didn't constantly check up on our sales."
Upon hearing the new information on Tyler's death, Leah had changed. Not dramatically, but certainly noticeable in my eyes. She walked with purpose. Her head held high and her hands almost always in a fist as she eyed the strangers in her shop. She saw them all as possible enemies and looked to them with judging eyes, just as she did when she was younger. Though this time, not looking for who slept with whose wife or husband or who stole what. Instead, she searched for a killer.
Chewing on my nails, I stared intently at the ticking clock with tired, dry eyes. Waiting, waiting for the moment this dark and unruly journey would begin. The anxiety of this day and the many more to follow after had taken precious sleep from me, just as I was getting back into the swing of things. I hadn't had my usual seven hours since her death, but my body was finally giving in and allowing me to get just enough rest to survive the day before hellish nightmares brought me back to reality, doused in sweat. But now, with my mind dead set on seeking justice, I was unable to sit still long enough for sleep to take me.
Noticing some small movement off to the side, my eyes fell past the clock and looked to the back door, the sunlight beaming against the dull pink curtains that hid the outside world from my eyes. Soft thuds could be heard just before a tall shadow stretched along the fabric. There was a rustling beyond the door, a few clicks and before I knew it, I was no longer alone.
"Afternoon," Leah greeted cheerfully as she slipped her way in rather clumsily. "Lovely day to begin a life of crime, wouldn't you say?" Closing the door behind her, she moved closer to me. Hauling her large duffle bag upwards before slapping it down onto the island, causing a few papers nearby to flutter and fall to the tile, out of our sight.
With a soft sigh, my hand moved from my mouth to rest over my eyes, fingers soothing my temples as I mumbled, "I really wish you would reconsider." She scoffed in reply. "Do you have any leads?" Lowering my hand, I looked to her with an intense stare, shaking my head slowly. "Do you know how to hack?" I answered in the same fashion."Well then. Looks like I'm all you've got." She replied in a fairly sassy tone, wearing a silly smile that quickly faded once she noticed my unwavering gaze, lips pulled into a tight line, showing her I was clearly not amused.
"Look, I know what I'm getting myself into-" "Do you?" "If I didn't I wouldn't be here right now." Shifting in my seat, I leaned forward. Hands dropping and entwining with one another as they fell to hang in the air between my knees. "You could go to jail." "Only if I get caught," she added with a wink. "And believe me, I can be very elusive."
Leah seemed completely unphased by the thought of our possible future. I didn't understand it. I didn't understand how she could smile and joke about silly little things, knowing we were about to throw ourselves down the darkest of tunnels. Never to return. But as I continued to study her, her every motion and twitch of muscle in her face the longer she held her smile, I felt almost..tranquil. The tension had left my shoulders and my clenched jaw had relaxed. She was no crazy broad who faced demons without a sick smile plastered on her face. She was a woman who saw the darkness and laughed through it, so that she wouldn't let it eat her up, breaking her until she was nothing but dust.
I caught myself shedding a small smile as she turned to face me, arms filled to the brim with notebooks, folders, pens and a few snacks. "Lead the way," she ordered.
Sliding off of the chair, I sluggishly made my way into the hallway and up the stairs with my tail close behind. We walked in silence, until we had reached the white, sticker covered door that had been closed ever since the two men had left it in peace. Left me in peace.
With my hand rested on the cold, brass knob, my eyes had slipped shut as my lungs were filled with warm air, preparing myself for the flood of memories. In a quick motion, like ripping a band-aid away, I had flung the door open, but remained on the outside of the room. My feet wouldn't dare cross the line. And though she's been gone for quit some time, to this day, I still expected to see her on the bed, ignoring my calls for her to wake up and get to school.
Releasing my hold, I pulled back, immediately crossing my arms over my chest. Pressing myself tightly to the wall as Leah moved in closer to get a better look of the place. Her eyes roamed the scene for a moment, taking it all in before smiling, stating "Cute room," before slowly making her way in. "Did you decorate or..?" I replied with a simple shake of my head, telling her that I had given my sister control over her own space. It was her canvas to paint. Her world to create.
"Well," with an unnecessary grunt, she bent low and carefully placed all of her things next to the slightly dusty desk that held various stacks of books, figurines and a laptop. "She has great taste, that's for sure."
With wide eyes, I looked to her. Mouth slightly agape as my gentle breathing hitched, startled by her words. Leah had referred to my sister in the present rather than past tense. Like she had never left us. Like she was simply away on a vacation that she would soon return from with glowing, tan skin. I liked the thought, and for a moment felt deceived as my brain went haywire to try to put the pieces back together. But was quickly reminded by the empty space that she wouldn't be coming home to me.
"How about you? Is interior design something in the family?" Straightening my spine, I slapped on a forced smile, leaning against the door-frame as I tried to recall every bedroom and every change I've experienced. Grimacing at the thought of my goth phase. The walls painted red with black borders, including the ceiling fan. Not the most welcoming sight, surely. I had since outgrown such a thing, but even now as an adult I wouldn't trust myself to decorate anyone else's room but my own. I could never stick to a theme. My ADD would go mad as I spotted the most random things and purchase them on a whim, creating quite the artsy mess that unintentionally spilled out into the rest of the home.
"No, definitely not." I replied with a small chuckle. "Just her and my mother. Dad and I are the type of people who don't give a shit how anything looks." With a mildly annoyed groan, she took a seat at the desk, her hand roaming lightly over the black surface of the computer. "Damn.. I was gonna see if you could fix up my place a bit." "I'm sure my mom would lo-" She waved her hand, dismissing my suggestion as she put her full attention into the object beneath her palm, slowly opening it. "Nah. Don't worry about it."
Jaw tightly clenched, I took a steady breath as my eyes slipped shut. Not wanting to see the life she once lived. I could hear the ruffling of papers and clicks of pens as Leah got to work. I allowed my curiosity get the best of me for the shortest of moments before immediately regretting the decision to take a look. I was still too weak for this. So with the softest of whispers, I excused myself and made my way back downstairs with haste. Like a monster had practically chased me away from its territory and once I was far enough, I felt a sense of relief. The dark monster that lurked on the top floor had vanished. I could no longer smell its rancid breath or see its sharp teeth, ready to rip out my fragile heart and use it as a chew toy before spitting it back into its cage. Leaving me a whole lot weaker than I was before.
It's been like this for quite some time. Ever since Tyler left, the entire top floor held nothing but darkness for me. If I ever had to travel up that way, my stay was either quick and painless, or I would sit and wait until I felt the need to crawl out of my own skin and rush back down the steps without a second thought. Though, on the nights where I was practically dead weight, I would collapse into my bed and slip away before the unsettling feeling had the chance to sink in. Other times I would grow angry over the fact that I couldn't sleep in my own bed and storm into my room, throw myself down and glare at the ceiling until sleep took over and when I just couldn't handle it, I'd grab my things and move to the couch. The mornings that followed would be spent groaning over numb arms and lack of strength. My back would crack and cry in pain as I tried to bend over. My head would only turn right, never left but it was worth it.
With a hefty sigh, I fell into my temporary bed. My back sinking into the soft cushions and the many piled up blankets that I had shoved aside had fallen onto my lap. I fiddled with the soft fabric as I looked ahead, catching sight of my tired reflection in the broken and now useless TV. I felt yawn trying to push itself forward, struggling against my clenched jaw until I just couldn't hold it back any longer. I gave in and heavy eyes followed soon after, suddenly feeling exhausted. Figuring that Leah was a big girl, I had collapsed, dragging every blanket to lay in a disorganized mess over my body before tucking my hands under the pillow. She's visited enough to know where things were and if she really needed me, she would wake me up without the slightest bit of guilt. But right now, my unconscious mind needed me more than she did.
An eternity was spent standing still. My wide eyes burning a hole into the closed and locked front door of my home that didn't exactly..feel like my home. Everything was so perfect under this roof. The walls held no cracks and were painted a solid color without the slightest fade or hiccup. The shelves were stacked with beautiful books and unlit candles. My living room was no longer host to a young woman, struggling to live with herself. The carpet was spotless and every inch of wooden flooring shined obnoxiously. Vases that I've not once seen before were scattered around the lower floor, holding beautiful flowers of many kinds. Soaking in the bright sunlight that poured in through the windows. But I wasn't taking it all in. I had acknowledged it but never truly investigated or questioned it. I was too busy waiting for nothing to happen. I had no control over my own body for so long and I so desperately wanted to rip the door open and run out into a word that was designed just for me. It was truly one of the most boring dreams I've ever had. Until thunderous knocks could be heard. The door rattling slightly with the great force applied. Now startled, I felt myself gain control, yet I still remained in place.
"Ms. Lewis," my visitor stated rather loudly. "it's Agent Ford. I'd like to speak with you."
Pushing forward, I found myself at the door a lot quicker than I had expected, ripping it open to reveal the green-eyed man dressed in the same suit he wore when I last saw him and I didn't mind one bit.
Upon seeing me, he shed a crooked smile as he greeted me with a simple "Hi. Listen I uh.. I heard there was a disturbance in the area."
"I-I haven't heard anything-" "Really?" he replied smoothly while moving in closer, causing me to back away from the door and into the hallway. He was eventually in the house, not once taking his eyes off of me or removing that sly smile of his. "I've been told otherwise."
I couldn't help but tremble slightly. Feeling weakened by the storm that danced around in my chest. I felt the sweat my nerves brought about glide against the coarse fabric of my denim button up. I was unable to decipher if this would soon turn into a nightmare, or a blissful dream but I desperately hoped for the latter. I felt myself grow hot at the mere thought of it, but remained calm as he continued his pursuit. His hand blindly searching for the door, slamming it shut behind him.
"I don't know what you're talking abou-" Before I knew it, my back was to the wall and his breath was tickling my skin. His eyes were dark with either lust, or rage. It took for his lips crashing onto mine in order for that question to be answered. I was a little surprised, to say the least, but accepted his affection and returned it with just as much power. He fought for dominance and I would one up him which would in turn make him more aggressive.
In a swift motion he had swiped his arm over the counter, removing every object that adorned it before lifting me and placing my apparent bare ass on its cold surface. His hands immediately moving to rip my top open, exposing my chest which he littered with kisses and gentle nips while I struggled to remove his pants. They barely had the chance to fall to his ankles before he slammed himself into me. Startled by the sudden pressure, I gasped but was quickly silenced by his calloused hand as he continued to move in and out of me roughly. But the noises at the back of my throat had come to a halt as I soon realized that I..couldn't feel him. I felt nothing. Not the warmth of his breath, the wetness between my legs or the pleasure he brought with every thrust. I should have known better. It was rare to experience sex within a dream and to actually feel as if it were real. I got lucky here and there, but it would never feel exactly like the real thing, but at least there was some feeling to it and I was hoping that this would be one of those times. But alas, I was left to sit here and take all he had to offer me and act as if I were actually enjoying it. I suppose the act of it was rather comforting, though. Having someone need to need me and distract me from all else.
"Evalyn," he cried into my neck. One hand tangled through his soft, brown hair while the other rested on his lower back, pulling him in with every motion.
He would mutter my name again and again. Each time shifting in pitch and tone. His voice slowly grew more feminine and much more..aggravated.
"Evalyn!" The invading voice shouted, pulling me away from the beautiful man and the world we were sharing.
With tired eyes, I managed to force them open just enough to catch sight of Leah looming over me. Arms crossed and an all-knowing smirk on her lips. Groaning, the arm that had been resting over my forehead had slipped low enough to shield my eyes from her.
"Morning, sunshine."
"How long was I asleep?" I mumbled.
"Five hours. That's quite a power nap, if you ask me. I thought about waking you up but I couldn't possibly bare the thought of interrupting your 'happy time'" she replied with a snicker and instead of delivering a witty comeback, I merely grunted and rolled over to my side. With my motion came a sudden collapse of papers.
Looking down, I frowned at a stack of now disorganized papers that lay between me and the back of the couch. "What's all of this?" I asked as I slowly sat up, collecting every sheet, scanning over the words that seemed like gibberish in my current state. My eyes fell on the folder they all spilled from and flipped to its cover and in sharpie, the title "Tyler Lewis' Case" and I was floored. My eyes grew wide and my mouth fell open to catch the flies. "This isn't-" I squeaked out in disbelief, quickly disregarding the folder and examining every page very closely until I noticed a few had faces of unfamiliar people stamped onto its surface.
"These are-" "Suspects."
Just as I was about to ask how she was able to get all of this information, she stated rather excitedly, "I'm hungry. Are you hungry? I think we should go get some pizza," before marching off to the front door, swiping my car keys off of the counter. "Are you coming or not?"
I hastily shoved all of the files back into the folder and nearly threw myself at my companion, lazily slipping my shoes and coat on and following her out to my car, which she refused to let me drive, seeing as I just woke up. She blared the radio and tapped her hands against the steering wheel, appearing completely unphased by what she had done. Like it was just another day to her while I stared down at my lap, carelessly flipping through it all and stating "I can't believe you did all of this." I was practically worshiping the ground she walked on and she was happily soaking it all in, wordlessly up until we reached the pizza joint where we snagged a booth in the far corner. Far away from anyone who felt the need to eavesdrop. Not that we had many people to worry about, considering the time. But we wanted to be incredibly cautious.
After placing our order, Leah had snatched up the folder, sorting through it all and organizing each profile with spare paper hair pins she had in her bag before laying them out for me to examine properly.
"How-how did you even get these?" "Well," she started up as she settled into her seat. Getting quite relaxed before she re-lived her evening that I apparently wasn't apart of. "First, I started with Tyler's email and discovered she was a frequent MySpace user, which I also broke into. Before anyone even got the slightest of glimpses that her account was active once again, I changed it to "Offline" and sifted through old messages. Focusing mainly on messages that occurred either the day of her murder, or a few days prior. I didn't find much for a while. A lot of silly banter between her and some guy who I'm pretty sure was flirting with her."
A short-lived smile played over my features as I continued to scan the over the pictures of these strangers. Remembering the night I found Tyler flipping through channels looking rather irritated. She confessed to me then that there was this boy that she'd only just begun hanging out with and he was already showing signs that he wanted more than just friendship. She didn't know how to react, let alone what she even wanted and felt put off by that. She eventually told him she's just a confused little teenager and they continued their friendship and he wouldn't let up on the cute words. Hopeful of a possible future with her.
"That'd be Riley " I replied. I met him a few times. He'd come home with Tyler a few times with a certain twinkle in his eyes as he watched her go upstairs. I would do the usual threats and glares until I grew to trust him. But the threats never ended. Not once. Though they were soon empty words and he was able to laugh it off and make sad attempts at scaring me.
"Well, you'll be happy to know he's nowhere on that list." "I didn't think he would be." "Feeling a little weird about going through their private moments, I moved on and found messages between her and this Alexis girl-" In an instant, my eyes shifted to one of the final files. The picture of a young girl with icy blond hair and lips painted a vibrant red. "Uh huh?" I mumbled through gritted teeth.
"They seemed to be pretty close. They kept talking about the party and Tyler didn't seem to be all that excited to go. She was nervous because I guess there would be some new people there and Alexis just kept pushing her until she caved. I didn't like that. It seemed a bit suspicious so I went into her account, next and when I got into her messages.. Jackpot." "Jackpot." I muttered darkly as I continued to glare at this girls face. "Turns out little Alexis is into some fucked up shit and so are a few of her friends."
Lowering my eyes from her stupid smile, I found her apparent name printed in bold, "Alexis Jane Thompson." In that moment, I felt myself tremble with anger. The paper slowly being crushed into my fists, but before it was completely damaged, Leah had pulled it from my grasp with ease, placing it back into the folder along with the rest of the files. Slowly, she leaned forward, resting on her folded arms, desperately trying to meet my eyes that were now staring at the red, glistening table. "Evalyn, I'm sorry-" She was cut off as our waitress returned with a large, circular disk that was covered in a disgustingly cheesy pizza that normally I would practically pitch a tent over. Leah thanked her with a bright smile on her face before returning her attention to my crumbling composure.
"Her best friend betrayed her." I stated as the fists were brought down to rest on the warm surface, carefully avoiding my dinner. "Alexis..murdered my sister." "No. Alexis was only part of it. This was.. I hate to say it, but this was a group of people. Every face you saw tonight are the ones that were in on it." "And you know this? You're so certain of yourself yet I see no pro-" With a swift motion, she had wiped out a thick fold of papers, resting between two fingers as she held it in front of my dumb face. "In here is a printed copy of every message between the suspects. Your proof is right in here. Now, we could end this all tonight. All we would have to do is take this over to the Police Department and they'd be arrested."
Ripping the papers from her hand, I had tucked it away into my coat pocket. Not ready to read them, but keeping them closer for when I would be. "No. They won't treat them fairly." "Fairly?" "A man rapes you of your innocence, so you take away what makes him a man. You lose sight in your eye, so you take it away from the one who stole it from you. You take a life, you lose yours. That's what I believe in and it might sound fucked up, but-" "No." She jumped in with a very serious look in her eyes. "All my life I've believed in an eye for an eye and if people have such a problem with it, then maybe they shouldn't do such terrible shit."
A great weight had been lifted from my shoulders then and a slow exhale through the nose had calmed me down quite a bit. I no longer felt nauseous at the thought of Alexis Thompson and what I would do to her when I found her. I felt nothing but anticipation and only a very small amount of fear. It was nearly buried beneath everything else. I wouldn't be alone on this, though in a way, I wish I would be. I didn't need the guilt to follow her through her life, but, she seemed just as driven as I was and it's not like I could turn her back around now. Though fearful of her own future, I was also grateful for her help and comfort.
Leaning back in unison I had crossed my arms over my chest. "I can't believe it. In five hours all I did was have imaginary intercourse that lasted like five minutes and you somehow conjured up all of this information."
She stifled a laugh as she finally began to dig into our late supper. "It was actually really fucking difficult."
