EMPIRE


Summary: She thinks he'll break her heart. She thinks she's going to make them fall.


vii. A Piece of Art

"Look who's here. It's Midget who secretly makes moon eyes at Mistress Meg with the pretty red hair and the blue eyes – and has Erwin Smith fawning over her boring ideas."

The bar was a sleazy place – full of action, full of whores who were willing to pleasure you with their hands and their tongues, and full of wine to drown yourself in. Charlie liked being in the bar, alcohol cup in hand, watching the idiots make even bigger dolts out of themselves – and in a fit of drunkenness, she would join them, a soldier who needed ultimate release from her memories and see how lucky she would be. There would be times you could wake up naked in a stranger's bed. There were times when you could wake up in the streets, dirty and filthy and smelling of dirt and you could be scolded ten times over by the neat freak in your squad or you could arrive in your building to see your cute little best friend sleeping with the books and the chessboard, smiling and more often now, tossing and turning in her sleep.

This time, however, was different. Charlie had been downing alcohol glass by glass on her own – until a clean pale hand adorned with a few calluses slapped the table and took away the glass. When the sand-haired girl had looked, it was Midget who she had seen – and then she had jabbed away at him. At the snip from her, Midget scowled and rolled his eyes and took the seat next to her.

"I don't make moon eyes at her, brat."

"You do," Charlie muttered. It was a private joke she shared with herself, that Midget looked at her. When Erwin looked at her, what did he see? If Midget looked, did he fawn over her, wonder to himself how her hair was fire and her eyes water? At this rate, her head spun and she felt more compelled to down more alcohol in a go. Denial, denial, Midget.

"I sure as hell don't."

"Sure as hell do."

"… You don't have any proof of that."

"Don't care."

Silence followed. Midget tapped for a drink – the bartended put a glass in his hands and poured alcoholic beverage in it.

"Why are you here, Midget?"

"None of your damn business, Cadet Hunter. Can't a man drink alcohol in piece?"

"Where's Erwin? Where's Jack?"

At the mention of Jack, Midget lightly placed the cup down. Jack. It had to be Jack. Jack who hung out with Hanji at her laboratory, Jack who had asked for a go with Midget during training periods and had a clean-cut set of looks. Handsome, young, and dapper – with dark hair and dark eyes like a raven's. Jack was smart, Jack was cool, and he was rational, and of course, Midget would like a young soldier like him. Jack and Midget spent a lot of time together, when Erwin would play with Meg in private rooms to themselves, and Charlie didn't bother to think about what the two men talked about.

They were silent people at best. They were both men. They were both soldiers – and prodigies. They could be the glory of the people soon. Logic and a sense of duty made them both. Of course. How can they not get along?

"Lithgow is visiting his parents separately." A sip and that was where he seemed intent to leave it.

"Erwin?"

Midget's scowl became deeper.

"He's with Shadis, discussing issues about the squad, since Thatcher's dead." He took slow sips – almost deliberate, to dodge her questions. Slow and quick – he drank like he drank water, fluidly, like it was a drug he needed to be able to live. Thatcher's dead. A whole council had to be summoned to confirm it, and they had to target Meg.

Now that I do think about it, Charlie thought, no one really mentioned who the council members were. They just called us and said it was pretty important.

"Should we disband?" Charlie propped her question, moving her face closer to his. Impassively, his reaction was to push her away with his hand and scowl.

"Erwin doesn't want to – and he always gets his way, one way or another. Why, you want to disband? Go ahead and leave the squad."

"I wouldn't want to leave the squad," Charlie snapped. Midget had always frustrated her. She knew she was dealing with a man. A dangerous man. And a man would occasionally thirst for a woman. A woman to fuck. So far, he had never let his guard down. Did he thirst? If he ever thirsted for a woman, who would it be?

"Good for you, then, brat."

He went on drinking. There was something up with him. It was something desperate. Like an animal that was caged. Like a bird that wanted to fly. Like a wolf that wished to be able to howl.

"Is it true?"

"True that what?" He rolled his eyes at her interruption. The cup hovered between the air and his mouth.

"That Meg had anything to do with Thatcher's death?" Charlie had been stationed somewhere else. The fray had seen them separated. Erwin had been at the front – and they had all scattered in different directions. Levi had been with Meg at the time. The rumors circulated that Levi had gotten a few scars and Meg had come running to him, eager to support him. "They said that Meg manipulated Thatcher into dying."

"That's fucking disgusting."

His hand shook slightly and he drank the beverage.

There had to be something.

But they knew.

They had seen her.

The words from the girl's mouth.

Her tears.

Broken.

"Now you're defending her? Fuck you!" The cup from Charlie's hands were gone. The glass broke and the shards crashed into a million pieces.

"FUCK YOU! Fuck you, Levi, to the deepest pit of hell where you belong! You're not and will never be worth the dirt in her shoes! Fuck you!" The words were fire, and Charlie lashed before she could begin thinking. Damn. The alcohol was too strong. She could feel the waves in her body tremble, her shoulder blades sliding twice as hard, twice as unruly as she was. The skin on her hand hit the table with amazing force and pairs of eyes devoured her with shock, but she did not wish to care. Let the world see this. Let the world condemn him and her.

They were all sinners.

"You're drunk." Midget wiped his hands. "Fuck me, huh?"

"FUCK YOU!" Charlie hissed. She pulled his cravat, her forehead ramming on the skin of his forehead. Her gray eyes against his small ones, so small it was hard to tell what the color of his eyes were. His eyes were dull, and sharp at the same time. Her hands didn't shake. They were hands that wanted to fight.

Callused fingers.

Large fingers.

"Didn't you want to do it yourself? You wanted to fuck me and fuck Erwin, too." The reply was dim and dark – and Charlie spat in his face.

"What if I wanted to say I wanted to fuck you right now?" Charlie let him go. He glared at her as he wiped the spit from his face.

"I don't want to fuck you," he snapped.

"Who would you fuck, then?" Charlie yawned. "Everyone wants to fuck someone. Shadis wanted to get into Thatcher's pants. Oh, correction – he got into hers already. Mike's fucked plenty of men and women. Too many to count. Nile Dawk is fucking his wife. Jack wants some pretty noble lady to warm his bed and spread her legs for him." A delicious idea spurred her mouth to move. "Oohwho would Erwin want to fuck?"

Suddenly, she giggled hard. Suddenly, Midget's grip on his cup tightened.

"I don't have interest in such bullshit."

"King of denial!" Charlie whispered. "You know everyone wants someone. Really, you have the sex drive of an old man. Come on. You need a diet of pussy to live on, the way I need a cock inside of me to make me feel alive."

"You're disgusting." Let him say what he liked. Charlie did not give any shit. Fucking was fun, plain and unapologetic. When she wanted to, she just did it. The feel of skin on hers – it made her feel something.

"You're a man, aren't you? Don't you have any sexual appetites?"

"No comment."

When Charlie looked at him again, he was leaving the bar. No doubt, he must have been disgusted. Good.

[-]

"Why did you not place Levi under your command, Commander Shadis?"

The day was dim, and the room was deserted. Papers were strewn over the long table, and the smell of what used to be Thatcher's perfume was fading in the air. Thatcher's death was a fresh new thing and loss was a new meaning for the squad. Notebooks were piled, and pens and inks were pored over. Thatcher's papers were to be given and shared among those she had deemed worthy enough to pore over them – Meg, Levi, Hanji, Shadis, Erwin, and possibly, even Jack as Charlie had her own things to think about.

"Levi has his own mind, and I'm sure he was a little thrown off by your pretty girlfriend's presence," Shadis replied, eye never leaving the page in the notebook he was reading. The candle light dimmed, but he still focused on the page. Erwin wanted to shrug – but he found himself unable to act as casual as he used to do. Everyday that came, it became harder and harder. Every day, there was Shadis who barked orders, and there was Levi to offer Erwin his service, honest to serve and ever loyal to any of Erwin's authority. Erwin trusted Levi – with his own life, with his own command. The man was reliable, and Erwin had never felt so strongly about a person until Levi had come along.

He would trust Levi with anything he held dear.

"Girlfriend? I am single, Commander."

Shadis snorted.

"I meant the lady with the dark dress that had a plunging neckline the day a council was called to investigate Caroline's death."

"She isn't my girlfriend."

"Then what is she to you?" The snip was enough to potentially threaten Erwin.

"We work closely together."

"A pretty and a gentle lady who smiles to your face, and behind your back, shoots arrows everyday and wields a politician's mind. Interesting choice of woman."

"She is not my woman."

She was not his woman. She would never be.

"You see her beauty, but not the iron underneath."

"I do see. She is silk hiding steel, Erwin. It would be good to keep her. Caroline would want that."

Silk hiding steel.

"She always wanted that."

"She wanted the best for that girl." Shadis scowled.

More silence.

He could have had it all.

He could have done something during that mission.

He had made the decision.

He wanted it all.

"Politics is a game that is tricky to manipulate, Erwin. If you would take my place, you should remember that."

"I know. Caroline taught me well."

"Nonetheless, there are daggers at your back that threaten you as much as the ones in front of you. You need to manage politics. You need someone who can help you."

"And?"

"She's your best pick."

"I have no problem with that."

And I never will.

"Erwin, help me sort out this paperwork."

"No problem."

[-]

"How many died?" Blood. Sweat. Tears. How many more did a man have to lose? Shadis was the Commander, and he had placed his attacks with his own duty on the line. He walked as a dutiful man among men, and there was no questioning his decisions, even if he cared little for the opinion of the nobility.

Shadis frowned.

"How many died?" Erwin repeated. Without a word, Shadis took Erwin's shoulders and looked him in the eye. These eyes, Erwin thought to himself, taking in the weight of the dark circles growing every year under his eyes, the heavy shoulders, his rough manners and rigorous speeches, were eyes that had seen more than he had.

"Too many to mention."

"Everyone dies sooner or later."

Shadis sighed.

"Let the boy die. Let the man be born," the Commander recited. "Remember that, Smith."

[-]

"Have you seen Commander Shadis lately?" A tall youth with brown hair asked Erwin, as they were cleaning their 3DMG. The lad had messy cheek-length blond hair and light-colored eyes. Lanky, like a stick. Erwin was sure he had seen him before – he had been part of Meg's graduating class. Another person who was good enough to serve under Commander Shadis' personal squad.

"Of course, I have." Erwin frowned. "What's your name?"

"My name is Braun."

"Braun?"

The youth grinned.

"Call me Braun."

"My name is Smith. Erwin Smith."

[-]

Dear Meg,

A fellow needs someone to talk to. Sometimes, I think of the way you used to climb up the chairs at the library just to get the books on the high shelves when you just could have asked some handsome and tall soldier to get the books you wanted for yourself – but then you climbed up and insisted you were fine. Then after that, you ended up falling and having tons of books in your face. I think of the way you used to cook in our squad, and how you used to stay up light to talk about things.

Do you know I saw a girl with red hair today? I thought she looked like you – but her eyes were hazel, not blue, and she was like you because she was sweet and kind and warm and gentle.

She'll never be the way you are.

The pen aches in his hands.

It bleeds – but the festering does not want to be continued. So he stares at the words and shakes his head.

This letter won't do.

Not in a world where everyone wants to fight and rule the world.

[-]

She lost her hairpins that night, you know.

She told me that she lost them in her room.

They were made of Sina-forged steel.

You said that she lost her pins.

You said that you thought she'd never lie.

You didn't imagine that her hairpins weren't in her room.

You still saw her, didn't you? But you still treated her like you were friends.

[-]

"For a rookie, you're quite smart." Hanji laughed.

Jack pretended not to mind. Her compliments, he liked. Her messy hair, her passionate nature – he liked it. She acknowledged him, but she was his senior, she was older, and she was married to her job. She was his superior, his boss, in a way, even if he had already split his divisions into two – the Science Research Division and the Medical Division.

"I thought you were fascinated by the Titans themselves."

"No, ma'am."

"Huh?"

"I wanted to learn," Jack said. Blunt and quick- that was his way. "I thought the Medical Division needed me more. I considered becoming a doctor, and I'm checking if I could do that this way."

"So you'll definitely work with Squad Leader Vane."

"Vane?"

"The man with the blue eyes who Levi likes to talk to. The two of them are good as friends."

"Hmm, he seems soft."

"He's just a man who wants to nourish life for the sake of goodness itself."

"Tch."

[-]

"Lithgow, you're going to Shiganshina."

"This fast?" Jack was suspicious. Did Vane mislike him or something? Vane had let it slip Capet was his niece, and no doubt, had sized him up. It wasn't Jack's faults the other female volunteers were often sneaking peeks at him whenever he passed by the room. To amuse himself in breaks, Jack often had to play chess by himself until Levi or Vane himself would pass by and pick the chess pieces wordlessly.

For Wall Sina's sake, he had only been there for a week. A fucking week.

"There's been a plague in Shiganshina. You'll go with Dr. Grisha Jaeger. He'll tell what to do."

[-]

Grisha Yeager had brown hair, and dark eyes and he had a gentleman's appearance. When Jack had arrived in Shiganshina, he had looked hard enough – and had found the doctor, after asking.

"What's your name?"

"Jack Lithgow."

"Who sent you?"

"Keith Shadis."

[-]

"What's your name?"

Charlie had scowled at the two men in uniform taking seats near her. One had chin-length blond hair, and the other had short hair.

"Gelgar Raskoph."

"Not you. I was asking your friend."

Said youth widened his eyes.

"My name is Braun," he allowed.

"The name's Charlie."

"Charlie?"

"Yes. Charlie Hunter."

"Oh, so she's the slut."

"Gelgar!"

"Hey, I'm just sayin' the truth, Braun."

Charlie rolled her eyes.

"What if I'm the slut, Braun?" she challenged as she watched Gelgar order. Braun's eyes bored into hers.

"What if I don't care that you're a slut?"

Charlie snorted.

Cheesy. Yech.

"Then that's fine, I guess."

"Slut or not, to me, you're Charlie Hunter."

"Think whatever you like. It's your freedom as a soldier to do that. Ask me to sleep with you, I don't care. We'll die anytime."

"You're honest, don't you know?"

"Me?" She thought it was a ruse. "Trust me, I'm not."

"It's my perception of you. You're open with me."

"That's because I'm an extravert."

"Extravert or not, I like your honesty."

"Well, you're naïve."

"And what does that make of you?"

"Worldly."

"Anything you'd like to get your boyfriend?" The bartender inquired, interrupting the conversation.

"I want mil-"

"No." Charlie cut him off.

"Get him vodka."

"Vodka?"

"Yes. My treat."

Misery loved company.

[-]

"I didn't think you would be friends with Braun."

"He's just a friend."

"Remember all those men you called friends who you slept with?" Erwin tapped the table lightly. He didn't miss things. "Braun doesn't seem like the type of man you would go for."

"Braun was my classmate. Nothing more."

"But you're friends with him."

"He is yours."

Erwin closed his eyes.

"A fellow soldier."

"… What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing? Huh?"

"Nothing at all."

As he spoke, a redhead passed by, head set on another direction.

[-]

Dear Meg,

I've made some friends! I hope you're not too worried about me from your perch there. I want to see you soon, and let's say I've been busy. Erwin and Jack occasionally keep me company. Anyway, don't be too hard on yourself, are you?

I can't think of what to write, life is full of Titans and humans.

-Charlie

[-]

"What happened to your woman?"

"Her?"

Her.

"You know, her. The girl with the red hair and the blue eyes who was pretty tiny. She was a nice thing."

Nile never looked any better.

"I thought you two would last as lovers."

"I didn't think you'd see us that way. We're just friends now."

"Why?"

"I thought it would be better for both of us."

"That's a pity."

Acidic. Acerbic.

"How is it so?"

Nile sipped from his coffee.

"I thought you two looked good together."

[-]

Who the fuck should I write to?

Damn it.

Dear Levi (haha, I know you're gonna enjoy this),

How is life? Still popping poop jokes? Ha. Take that. While you're picking new soldiers for your so-called badass elite squad, you might be wondering where the fuck I am. I'm sure you'd ask Hanji. After all, Hanji is my friend. You're my friend, you lucky bastard who got to see Mistress Meg naked twice.

Anyway, I'm in Shiganshina, working with a certain Dr. Grisha Jaeger. He's housing me. The man is married, and his wife's not bad to look at. Still can't hold a candle to Meg, but holds a candle to Charlie, that is. (Don't tell her that, I just think Charlie is kinda cute but Hanji and Meg are prettier.) Her name is Carla, and she mothers me. She tells me that Grisha is a kind man and what am I to do but believe her? When Grisha is sleeping, sometimes, the good woman and I talk.

By this rate, we've become good friends. Carla hopes to have more children with her husband, and she asks me if I've thought of marriage. I said that I was sweet on someone. Later that night, I thought if I really said the truth to her.

Maybe. Maybe not.

At this point, you might be the only person I am sweet on. Don't assume that I look at you that way. I just get so frustrated. Maybe I do need some release once in a while. Reminds me. Once I'm out of Shiganshina, let us get drinking and get laid. It's been a year since I told Charlie I'd get laid.

Look at Charlie – she's laid and she likes it.

Goddamnit.

-Jack

[-]

"Did you miss me?" Hanji asked, unable to curb her enthusiasm. The hot cup of coffee was not given its due attention. The worn eatery in Shiganshina captured her – the energy of the bustling population. The mosquitoes in dirty alleys. The cats running rampant, in the maze of this large city. And also – Jack Lithgow, one of her old squad mates. Jack Lithgow, once considered a sort of idol of sorts for the other soldiers, who was now in Shiganshina under Shadis' orders. Jack's skin was paler than ever, and he did look a little more mature, but nonetheless, grown more handsome with the months.

The pale skin of his collarbone, the white collar of his shirt, his clean vest and his coat laid on the table. The skin of his arm on her hand. The light on his ears and the smell of sickness and humanity resting on his eyes.

"You know I did."

"Good to know that."

"Did you get my letter?"

"The one you sent to Levi?"

"Yes."

Hanji laughed.

"What?"

"I read it – and it was funny."

Jack blushed slightly.

"But really? How sweet are you on him?"

Jack shrugged.

"He and I are just friends."

"Do you swing that way?"

"NO!"

"Ohh…"

"Well, how about you?"

"Me?"

"What have you been up to, since I left? Shadis ordering you around? Or you do miss Thatcher? Is Charlie still sleeping around? Is Erwin getting busier and busier? Is Levi taking care of himself?"

Jack had outdone himself, Hanji thought. He was good at predicting things. He could sense them but he relied on his own thinking to get himself out and safe.

"I missed Thatcher. I missed you. I missed Charlie's horrible jokes. And Levi, too. Shadis, not too much." Jack's lips twisted. "I'd rather see Thatcher or Erwin become the Commander. Shadis is too fucking angsty. Shadis is too traditional. I hate it."

"You do realize," Hanji murmured, " that Shadis is doing his job."

Jack's gaze cut through her.

"And is that all?"

"You mislike him." Hanji gnawed on a fingernail. "Do you have any idea what Shadis is undergoing right now?"

"He's a boss. He likes bossing people around – on what tradition dictates."

"Jack. Have you ever been in love?"

"No."

"Have you ever seen the way that Shadis looked and talked about Thatcher?"

"Huh?"

"You wouldn't understand."

"Me?"

He did not get it.

"You've never been in love, to have a bleeding heart in a dangerous time, in a time of war. In our time, we don't have fairy tales. What we have is a life that is temporary, that pain is inevitable and what do we do? We weather the tides."

"How about you?"

Hanji blinked.

"You're my underling. You're not supposed to ask questions like that."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Let the boy die. Let the man be born. That's what they say in the military."

[-]

"Have you ever loved a woman, Erwin?"

"Sir?"

"I was asking you a question." Shadis did not cross his eyes. Nor did he look away. His gaze was heavy and clear, and he knew what he wanted. Erwin knew better than to avoid the Commander's gaze. He was at the Commander's mercy, after all. In Shadis' hand was a flask of alcohol – it smelled oddly like the same type of alcohol that Thatcher used to consume when she felt like drinking. Shadis smelled slightly of blood – and dead roses.

"I was listening."

"Good. Then answer my question. Have you ever loved a woman, Erwin Smith?"

"Answer me!"

"I have."

"Do you know what it is like to lose her?"

"How exactly, lose? Dead or alive?"

"Both."

He had to be honest. There was little point in fooling Shadis. Shadis was a simple man, after all. A simple man he was, but he was a man who took to things the way they were supposed to be. He sensed things, and ideas were of a rather lesser concern to him.

"I've lost a woman in my life. I almost made a mistake with it."

"Why didn't you keep her if you loved her?"

"That's because… I wanted other things. More than her."

"You were the same."

[-]

Hey Erwin,

I'm in Shiganshina? Is Shadis killing you slowly? You're so busy the only one left I have to write to is Levi. And you know how Levi is. Seriously.

-Jack

Jack,

Shadis has made me his personal aide. I am at his beck and call almost everyday. It's mostly work.

-Erwin

Erwin,

DO. YOU. NOT. HAVE. A LIFE?

-Jack

P.S. I don't have a life either, besides work.

[-]

Let the boy die.
Let the man be born.

That was what they said in the military.

[-]

"You're a soldier, aren't you?"

Jack glanced from his shoulder to throw Grisha a glance.

"I am," Jack admitted. He had always detested useless melodrama.

"What specific regiment?"

"Why are you even asking? If you're asking, I come from the Scouting Legion. Commander Shadis sent me here."

"Ah. I see now." Grisha smiled fondly. "He did warn me you would come. He talked about you. A dark-haired man with dapper looks, and a mind made for intelligence."

[-]

When he dropped the first silverware set he ever bought, he found himself looking at the scattered piece of glass and porcelain. It was flimsy – and as soft as it was, it was breakable. Pretty to look at, but not durable, not able to adapt. His fingers had touched it, feeling the glass that hardened and melded its shape. His thumb and index finger clung to the lifeless piece of pottery, his eyes slits as he tried to figure this thing out. Royals used this – why not pour tea and drink from it?

He took a sip. This life was certainly a paradox in its own respects. He still remembered it all – the mosquitoes and the bites, the reddish marks that itched and clawed under his skin, the deadly poison into his bloodstream angrily leaking. What had he looked up to? The upper life, a life from the poverty and the dead darkness that had hovered above his head, the presence of those thugs who wanted his head on a spike. He had wanted to be safe and sound, that security, the protection he wanted so much was a protection he could have offered to some lucky wench who wanted to push herself on him. He could have been that man.

He could have been in the high rise of the social strata. If that had been, then would he still be the man he was now? Erwin had made him a soldier with a cause – and the ghosts haunted the back of his mind.

Would he still –

The handle of the cup snapped. The porcelain exploded, small fire in the electricity that crackled through the details and the shape of the cup.

Levi did not want to say anything.

This was…

Unforgivable.

His reverie was interrupted, his train of thought perturbed by the penetration of a plain piece of pottery's explosion.

Fragile and beautiful.

Things he knew.

A woman he could know.

Memories.

His fingertips gave in to the coldness that shrouded his mind. Like a sunburn, the mark had not come off. He had not thought in long runs – he had never even tried.

Needless to say, this was traumatizing.

[-]

The sunlight came, and golden shines lingered in the red locks that were tied up. Loosening hair strands and blue eyes that stared, meeting dark ones. In the darkness, the sudden sight of the light almost made her unnerved.

"Do you know why I put you in my squad, Capet?"

"That's because Caroline trusted you. She would trust you – or Erwin – to look after me."

"Wrong answer. You're not always right, you know." Shadis scowled. "That's why you were on temporary hiatus, just missions, no real expedition for the time being until I say so. You're still a work in progress – like Erwin is. You two are a team and you two need each other like the sun and moon need each other."

His gaze bored through her. In her uniform, she felt oddly conscious.

"He needs you. You need him. You two are good with dealing with the higher-ups. I heard about your little trial." Meg noted there was a rather distasteful aroma with which he spoke the sentence. He could easily have seen through it all. No one had been allowed to speak. The memory made her skin burn, and her eyes water at the thought.

"My hands are stained," Meg replied curtly. "I don't want your pity. I don't want your judgement."

"My, my. What happened to you?"

"Nothing."

Lies.

"It's not like you to release your tears. Caroline told me you were an emotional one. What's happened to the girl who dreamed of romance?"

"She's dead," Meg snapped.

"Then who is the girl in front of me?"

Meg raised her chin and cupped her hands.

"I just don't want to cry no more. I don't want to die a little more everyday – I want to pull myself from harm."

[-]

"Are you sure you're fine?"

Meg looked up – and saw blond hair and blue eyes and a hand on top of her hand.

"Define fine," she replied, wiping her face.

"You look unwell."

Meg bit her lip.

"I can deal with it."

"You look blank. You're not being yourself."

"I'm trying to adapt. Shadis' squad isn't exactly the best place for a soldier like I am. You know me, Erwin Smith."

"You can do it."

"R-Really?"

"Remember, that this is a chessboard. I'm the king. You're the queen – and Levi is the knight. I'll always be here to help you."

For a moment, Meg could have sworn that during that moment, she felt something jolt in the air. Her cheeks reddened, and the eye contact so intense it felt almost so wonderful, that she was almost floating. It was something so similar in the air – the air when Levi had jumped in to push the lecherous minstrel away from. Somehow, it reminded her of that.

"That's better."

"Huh?"

"You're smiling. It's nice."

[-]

When he left the room, Meg buried her face in a book.

What was this feeling?

[-]

"What's your major malfunction, Capet?!"

Squad Shadis was cleaning their apartment, when Meg had fallen from cleaning the library shelves, landing on her face.

"I slipped –"

"And I saved her," came Erwin's voice.


"Don't you mind it's always you and me being stuck together?"

It was night – and they were in Erwin's room, playing chess again.

"Mind it?"

"Yeah."

"I don't. In fact, I like it."


"Capet!"

"W-What is it, sir?"

"Stick to Smith at all times! I can't have your ass getting suicidal on us all the time!"


"Capet!"

"What is it, sir?"

"You're in charge of the Correspondences from now on."

"What else, sir?"

"Take care of Smith for me. Also, you're on your own."

On your own.


"How is it taking care of Correspondence?"

"It's keeping me busy, but makes me sentimental. All these letters - they have someone they love."

"And you don't?"

"I can tell you so little, Erwin." She laughed bitterly. "No one will ever marry me for love. No one will kiss me for love. No one at all. How many rape attempts are going to change that fact?"


Notes: I'm so sorry this is so late, I'm having my sixth final exam tomorrow and after two, I'm free for a month! 3 Thanks for the reviews and support! We finally have Grisha's debut. A few more canons will be making more appearances in the next chapters to follow. I have to fill the gaps with the years passing. Also, the brackets in the last section represent the time period. Baby Meg is growing up. :3

PSA: The last breaks have timeskips.