It's a day of rest for the couples, and our liars are in for quite the surprise thanks to their friends! Can they get through it? Probably. Can they get through it without turning permanently red? Doubt it. Will today be the day that they finally have The Conversation? Maybe. Well, good luck, liars!
As always, I don't own GMW, author's notes are at the bottom, y'all are fantastic, and check it out on ao3 (/works/7973113/chapters/32672385) for imbedded images
If You Asked Me If I Loved Him
A Heart of Steel Starts to Grow
The first thing that Riley registered when she woke up was the solid chest under her head. Almost immediately after, she noticed the Beauty and the Beast menu music was still playing, and so she reached over Farkle to grab the remote.
"Hngn?" Farkle mumbled, feeling her weight shift.
"Sorry Farkley, just turning off the TV," she whispered.
"No, we should get up soon, don't want to waste out entire time away from the others." Riley nodded and grabbed her phone.
"Um, Farkle? I'm not sure how much of an escape we're getting," she told him, showing him her text from Maya.
"What does she mean, 'you're welcome'?"
"I have no idea!" Just as Riley went to reply, the room's phone rang, and she answered quickly.
"Hello, Riley Matthews speaking."
Farkle couldn't understand the voice on the other end, but he saw Riley's face pale when they finished.
"Yes of course- out in ten? And it's for ten thirty? Alright, thank you, have a nice day."
"What was that all about?"
"It turns out a certain Mr. Babinaux found out that the honeymoon suite includes a couples' massage and he and Miss Hart took the liberty of booking ours for today… We need to clear out within ten minutes for them to set up and then be back for ten thirty…"
"Oh…" Farkle hummed, unsure of what to expect.
"I guess we should get changed?" Riley suggested, equally nervous.
"Yeah, that sounds good… I'll take the bathroom?" Farkle offered, as the two reluctantly got out of bed.
Riley nodded, already preoccupied with grabbing a dress that would be easy to take off and a bathing suit to wear underneath, as she tried not to think of what lay ahead, and soon the fake couple found themselves sitting across from each other at breakfast.
"So, what exactly should I be expecting?" Farkle asked hesitantly.
"Honestly? I have absolutely no idea."
"Are you okay with it though? Like I know that usually you have to get undressed for a massage and like I don't want to make you uncomfortable by being there too-"
"Farkle, breathe. Yes, I'm nervous. Yes, I'd rather this weren't happening, but I'll be fine. I do know how to say no if it's too much."
"I know you do, it's just that… ugh how do I put this… It's like… like the boundaries have become fuzzy and I don't know when consent is actually consent and when consent is because we have no other choice and I don't want to take advantage of you and I know that you can speak up but I also know that you have a need to make people happy and that there's a chance that could make you agree to things outside of your boundaries just to satisfy the others."
"You're right, and I know that, but I also don't know where my boundaries are, you know? And you're allowed to draw lines too, consent isn't only for girls."
Farkle tilted his head in agreement and they went back to eating, which had them at their door right on time- though far too soon for their liking.
Almost two hours later, their room had been returned to its normal state, although the red of the couple's faces had not.
"So, now that you're all relaxed and whatever, there's something else we need to talk about, Riles," Farkle told her from his side of the bed, turning his head slightly to look at her.
"I'm not sure I like the sound of that… What is it?"
"You haven't been eating except for what I force you to. What's going on? I'm worried about you."
"It's… it's a long story. I mean, I guess you have your suspicions and observations, but it's still long and complicated and not worth getting into-"
"You're stalling, Riles, and if it's anything like my suspicions, it's also the most important thing in the world right now. Last time you were like this was before Grease, February of junior year… Is it your eating disorder again?"
"Wow, okay, you didn't beat around the bush… Are we on a time limit that I didn't know about?" She tried to joke, with an obviously fake laugh.
"Riles, I'm not someone who is just going to stop asking. I know you, remember? I know your tricks. Something's wrong, and we're not leaving this bed until we've talked about it."
"It's nothing, seriously. It's definitely not worth wasting an entire day at Disney," she deflected, rather unsuccessfully.
"We both know that's bull. Nothing is more important to me than your health."
"I'm fine, I'm always fine. I'm Riley, I'm Cory and Topanga's perfect daughter, I'm a big sister, I'm about to play the lead in Chicago, my mom says I'm "good at sleeping", I'm weird and stupid, according to Maya I'm "always wrong", and I'm a superklutz-"
"Yeah, see, Riles, I have a funny feeling that all that's been waiting for a long while to come out now. You don't need to be fine with me, I need you to be honest."
Farkle stretched his arm out, using it to pull Riley against him as she started to shake.
"I'm so damn tired of this, Farkle. I'm so damn tired of everyone. Everyone sees me as a stupid goofball, but I'm one of the smartest kids in the grade. Remember when we had that project in middle school about our limits? Yeah, that's the week that my mom- the same mom who goes on and on about how Maya is a freaking Amazon Warrior- told me that I was good at sleeping. I just want to be good enough for people, Farkle, why am I never good enough?"
"You're more than good enough, I swear it. People don't always see it because they see faith and optimism as a weakness, or even a sign of stupidity, but –and we both know Isadora would agree with me on this- it's actually one of the greatest strengths a person can have."
"No fair, you know I can't argue when you use Izzy as a source! But…"
"But you still don't think you're good enough."
"I wasn't good enough for Lucas, I'm never good enough for my parents, even Maya thinks I'm an idiot most of the time. And I could probably handle that if it weren't for… well if it weren't for everything else."
"Everything else?" Farkle asks, softly, gently, like he was approaching a wounded animal.
Riley sighed, "I practically live onstage, Farkle. I'm constantly on display, surrounded by petite girls. Trying on costumes is a nightmare, and I want to cry whenever there's a lift in choreo because I'm taller than half of the boys, especially when we wear character shoes. I just- I just-" she sighed, shaking her head and plastering on a smile. "It's fine, Farkle, honestly. I've got it under control."
A heart of steel starts to grow
Farkle eyed her carefully, "first of all, Riles, that is bullshit. You are absolutely beautiful and unbelievably intelligent, and anyone who doesn't see that is an idiot. I know that I can't convince you instantly but I'm here, Riles, I'm always here for you. I'm not going to push right now, because we're on vacation, but I know you're not fine, and we will work on it together. It's always been us against the world, right? This won't be any different."
"Promise?" Riley asked softly.
"Promise," he agreed, pulling her into a tight hug.
When they pulled away, the two teens had identical smiles on their faces.
"So much for a fun day," Riley laughed.
"We can still have fun! You want to go to the pool?" Farkle asked. Riley nodded and so the duo, still in their bathing suits from that morning, made their way down to the pool.
Okay wow I don't know how this ended up taking so long to write (yes I do, it's because The Conversation hit a little too close to home) and I'm really sorry for the wait! I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and please let me know what you think!
-Arty
